Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Thursday,
June 19th, 2014
THE BITS…
Police were called to Selena Gomez’s house because of a loud party that included
live music and tacos. Selena should’ve gone with soft shell tacos.
Police in Rhode Island arrested three people for throwing beer bottles at Taylor
Swift's beachfront home. The three were identified as John Mayer, Harry Styles
and Jake Gyllenhaal.
Kanye West had a tarot card reading yesterday and was found to have a beautiful,
childlike soul. Kanye then cussed out the reader and beat him up.
Jeopardy host Alex Trebek says that his breakfast consists of a Milky Way candy
bar and a Diet Coke. I’ll take “What are the causes of Alex Trebek’s two heart
attacks” for $500.
Comic strip character Garfield is 36 today. Garfield is like most American 36-yearolds – overweight and lazy.
The U.S. Patent and Trademark Office has canceled six trademarks for the
Washington Redskins. Although they didn’t specify which name was more
offensive; ‘Redskins’ or ‘Washington.’
The U.S. Patent and Trademark Office has canceled six trademarks for the
Washington Redskins. Word has it the Redskins plan to change their name just as
soon as they decide on a new minority to offend.
Seattle Seahawks players Richard Sherman and Phil Bates got into a fight during a
team practice yesterday. You can’t blame them for being in a bad mood
considering the terrible season they had last year.
Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Thursday,
June 19th, 2014
SON OF THE BITS…
The Los Angeles Dodgers’ Clayton Kershaw threw a no-hitter last night against
the Colorado Rockies. It was the first no-hitter out of Los Angeles since the last
Mariah Carey album.
The San Antonio Spurs held their NBA championship parade yesterday.
Meanwhile, a depressed LeBron James has been cramping around the house.
The San Antonio Spurs held their NBA championship parade yesterday. It was the
biggest celebration for the Spurs since Tony Parker divorced Eva Longoria.
Hillary Clinton says she supports medical marijuana and will wait and see how
recreational pot works in Colorado and Washington. So, it looks like we may have
finally found a Clinton willing to inhale.
On this date in 1856 the first Republican national convention ended in
Philadelphia. Their nominee for president that year was John McCain.
A Chinese man reportedly died from sleep deprivation after staying up too late
watching the World Cup. That’s odd because, normally, watching soccer puts
people to sleep.
A kayaker in Upstate New York was hospitalized after being attacked by a beaver.
However, Ward told June he plans to have a word with the Beaver.
McDonald's has been named America’s least favorite fast food chain. That was
according to a survey of underpaid McDonald’s employees.
Scientists in Poland have reported observing two male brown bears performing
oral sex on one another. And you thought it was fun to watch Yogi and Boo-Boo.
Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Thursday,
June 19th, 2014
TODAY’S AUDIO…
Today on the Bitman audio feed we have clips from So You Think You
Can Dance, plus a late night round up with Dave, The Jimmys, Craig,
Seth and Conan.
Plus more from Pamela Furr and the Bitman audio archive! It’s all at
BitmanComedy.com in the Subscribers area
Not hearing anything? TV Sound bites are available at
BitmanComedy.com! If you need access to the site, contact Adrienne
Munos at United Stations Radio Network at 561-381-7598 or
amunos@unitedstations.com
Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Thursday,
June 19th, 2014
TINSELTOWN TATTLER…
Police were called to SELENA GOMEZ’S house on Tuesday night because of a
loud party. In fact, one neighbor told TMZ that the music was so loud her windows
were rattling. No word on whether JUSTIN BIEBER was at the party, but word is
that Selena has told her family that she’s back together with him because he’s
cleaned up his act. However, they’re not buying it since Selena seems to have
returned to the party scene since Bieber returned. In any case, Selena and her
friends were said to be cooperative with police and she later posted a photo on
Instagram with the caption, "Tacos, live music and candles?? such a beautiful night
with beautiful people."
It took two years but JENNIFER LOPEZ and MARC ANTHONY are finally
officially single as they’ve signed off on their divorce. Among the conditions is
that they’ll make their best effort to avoid unwanted publicity when it comes to
their 6-year-old twins Emme and Max and shield them from "aggressive news
organizations and photographers." J.Lo gets primary custody and Marc gets the
kids seven days a month, although nannies must be present.
Rumor has it that JESSICA SIMPSON will be walking down the aisle this Fourth
of July weekend. Jessica and fiancé Eric Johnson have long planned to get married
and will reportedly tie the knot in Santa Barbara.
Could there be a new couple alert for KATY PERRY and ROBERT
PATTINSON? The buzz is that Pattinson is smitten with Katy and even hooked up
with her at an after-party for his latest film, The Rover, in Los Angeles last week
with a supposed eyewitness saying they were “all over each other.” After doing
the red carpet thing, Pattinson skipped the screening of the movie and went to a
party at the W Hotel to hang with Katy. This witness says, “When Rob saw Katy
his eyes lit up. She looked gorgeous in a lace sequin black mini-dress, and they
hugged and kissed.” They went on to say, “At least 10 hotties were hovering
around Rob, but his focus was on Katy. He kept kissing her the entire night.”
Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Thursday,
June 19th, 2014
TINSELTOWN TATTLER 2…
CASEY KASEM may be gone, but his family feud continues. Casey’s daughter
Kerri still plans to file elder abuse charges against Casey’s wife, Jean Kasem. The
big bombshell is that Kerri is accusing Jean of cheating on Casey while he was
dying. A neighbor supposedly saw Jean kissing a younger man who’s been living
in their Malibu home. Court documents also state that back in 2007, Casey told a
doctor he believed he’d been divorced from Jean for years. The documents go on
to say that witnesses will testify that Jean had been lying to Casey for at least two
years, telling him that they were divorced.
There could be another family feud brewing over an ailing celebrity. Debby
Campbell, who’s one of singer GLEN CAMPBELL’S daughters, found out her
father had been placed in a Nashville assisted living facility through the media.
Glen’s family placed him there because he was becoming a danger to himself and
they felt they could no longer properly care for him. Debby says she wants to move
him into her house in Arizona, claiming Glen has told her numerous times that he
wants to go home. However, Debby is Glen’s daughter by a previous marriage and
there’s no word on how close she is to the rest of Glen’s current family.
Pretty Little Liars star ASHLEY BENSON got a temporary restraining order
against a guy who used to be a security guard on the Warner Bros. lot where the
show is filmed. The creep was telling people he has a relationship with her and
sexual feelings for her and that God told him to pursue her romantically. It all
started after she happened to glance at him one day, and he believed she and others
were silently communicating messages to him.
That break-in at SANDRA BULLOCK'S house keeps getting scarier. It was later
determined that the guy who broke in wasn’t there for valuables, but had a thing
for Sandra. It was later learned he owned a machine gun and now they’re saying he
had an arsenal of seven machine guns, plus other weapons and tracer bullets as
well. The guy has been charged with 19 felonies and with stalking.
Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Thursday,
June 19th, 2014
TINSELTOWN TATTLER 3…
Actor MICHAEL JACE, who played a police officer on the TV show The Shield,
has pleaded not guilty to murder in the death of his wife last month in their Los
Angeles home. It could be tough to beat the rap as he called 911 afterwards and
admitted he’d killed her. Jace was also ordered to stay away from his two young
sons, who witnessed the killing, should he ever be released on $2 million bail.
The father of REAL HOUSEWIVES OF NEW JERSEY star JOE GIUDICE
collapsed and died in Joe's garden yesterday. FRANK GIUDICE also appeared on
the show and was building a chicken coop in the garden when he collapsed.
There’s no official cause of death as of yet, but Joe and Teresa believe he suffered
a massive heart attack. Frank was 63.
Now that JAY LENO has really left THE TONIGHT SHOW, the truth can be told!
One of Leno’s producers, Dave Berg, has written a new tell-all book about what
went on behind the scenes. He says that Dennis Rodman was perennially late and
would never get in the limo they sent, so they finally had to get him to the studio in
a helicopter, but he was still late! As for who was the biggest diva, Berg says it was
a toss-up between Teri Hatcher and Jessica Simpson. Jessica refused to come on
the show unless Leno's crew paid the $18,000 she required to have her hair and
makeup done. When Hatcher got bumped from the show in 2009 so President
Obama could make an appearance, her people said a Louis Vuitton handbag would
make a really great apology gift. Alas, she had to settle for a bouquet of flowers.
Also, Christian Bale refused to make a return appearance after Leno asked personal
questions like where he grew up and what his first acting job was.
Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Thursday,
June 19th, 2014
TINSELTOWN TATTLER 4…
It turns out that MALIA OBAMA’S job as a production assistant on the set of
Halle Berry's new TV show "Extant" was nowhere near as glamorous as it
sounded. The president's daughter spent most of her day going on runs for coffee
and drinks for the cast and helped the crew by blocking people from walking
through scenes during shooting. Despite Secret Service agents on the set, not
everyone even knew who she was. At least one person talked to her about sports
without knowing she was the president’s daughter.
Was DUCHESS KATE’S grandmother a World War 2 spy? Sort of. Yesterday,
Kate paid a visit to Bletchley Park, the British spy school where her grandmother
was one of dozens of women who worked to break Nazi codes. Bletchley is now a
national historic site, which has been restored to its WWII-era appearance. During
her visit, Kate even got to meet one of the code breakers who worked with her
grandmother and her grandmother’s sister back then.
Jeopardy! host ALEX TREBEK says that despite undergoing close to 20 different
surgical procedures and having two heart attacks, he doesn’t diet and for years his
breakfast was a Snickers and a Diet Pepsi. Trebek added that this past year he ran
into a nutritionist who told him he had to eat better. Alex says he stopped eating
Snickers and Diet Pepsi and replaced them with Milky Ways and Diet Cokes.
Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Thursday,
June 19th, 2014
DATELINE HOLLYWOOD…
The upcoming final season of BOARDWALK EMPIRE will jump forward seven
years to the Great Depression. The cast says the days of shiny shoes and suits will
be gone when the final season airs this fall on HBO.
BIG BROTHER returns for a new season next Wednesday and this time they’ll
have several new twists. One will be an interactive element that’ll let fans
influence the game from home. This season will be in high-definition for the first
time and the guests will live in an urban tree house-themed home.
More nominees have been announced for the TEEN CHOICE AWARDS.
Nominees in the music categories include Taylor Swift, Justin Timberlake, One
Direction and Beyoncé. Fans between ages 13-19 can vote once each day per
category at TeenChoiceAwards.com.
JAY LENO will be presented with the 17th annual Mark Twain Prize for American
Humor. The ceremony honoring Leno will be held on October 19th at the Kennedy
Center.
Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Thursday,
June 19th, 2014
MUSIC NOTES…
Here are last week’s top 10 albums (with sales figures) according to Billboard
magazine…
1. Jack White - Lazaretto - 138,000
2. Miranda Lambert - Platinum - 62,000
3. Soundtrack - Frozen - 50,000
4. Brantley Gilbert - Just As I Am - 40,000
5. Soundtrack - The Fault in Our Stars - 38,000
6. Various - Now 50 - 34,000
7. Coldplay - Ghost Stories - 33,000
8. The Black Keys - Turn Blue - 26,000
9. Michael Jackson - Xscape - 25,000
10. Various - Now That's What I Call Country: Volume 7 - 22,000
JACK WHITE has set a record for the best one-week sales of a vinyl album since
the Sound Scan electronic sales monitoring system went into effect in 1991. Of the
138,000 copies of White’s Lazaretto sold this week, 40,000 were vinyl.
KORN is planning to release an expanded edition of its latest album, "The
Paradigm Shift," this summer. The extra tracks will include songs that didn’t make
the final cut for the album and some live music.
THE BABYS are back with a new album called "I'll Have Some of That!" due
June 24th. Founding members Wally Stocker and Tony Brock will return without
original frontman John Waite and Jonathan Cain, but both have given the reunion
their blessings.
Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Thursday,
June 19th, 2014
MUSIC NOTES 2…
MARIAH CAREY has launched her own soft drink. It’s called Butterfly with the
bottle’s label describing it as "a melodic beverage".
MILEY CYRUS may be naughty, but she can also be nice. Miley recorded a video
for a young fan named Caley Camarillo, who was dying of cystic fibrosis. Miley
met her a couple years ago and recorded a video for her just before she died last
Friday. Caley’s mom said her daughter was able to watch Miley’s video an hour
before she had passed. Miley also dedicated her next show to Caley. (See here)
SIA recently had some of her favorite clothes ruined by Metropolitan Garment
Cleaning in New York and when the dry cleaner refused to make it right, she asked
her fans for help by asking for revenge and prank suggestions. The winning
suggestion was to send her fans to Yelp to write terrible reviews of the dry cleaner.
The Lifetime channel biopic of AALIYAH has already hit a snag. Aaliyah's uncle
and former manager, Barry Hankerson, says the family is cheesed because no one
gave them the heads up and they plan to try and block the film. Like Whitney
Houston’s family, they’re not opposed to a biopic, but they feel their girl is
deserving of the big screen.
PITBULL received an honorary degree from Doral College in his hometown of
Miami this week in honor of his support for education.
DR. DRE is spreading the wealth after the $3.2 billion sale of his Beats
Entertainment. Dre was partying at West Hollywood's Mondrian Hotel, doing shots
of tequila at its poolside bar, and left behind a $5,000 tip for the waitress.
Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Thursday,
June 19th, 2014
MUSIC NOTES 3…
You’ll soon be able to sleep with MIRANDA LAMBERT! Miranda is opening a
bed and breakfast called Ladysmith in her hometown of Tishomingo, Oklahoma.
Miranda bought the building across from her Pink Pistol gift store and has been
renovating it for the past year. No word on when they’ll have the grand opening.
Police in Rhode Island arrested three people outside TAYLOR SWIFT'S
beachfront home after they threw beer bottles and shouted expletives at the guards.
Swift wasn't there at the time.
Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Thursday,
June 19th, 2014
TUBULAR…
Daytime:
GMA: Kate Gosselin; singer Jennifer Lopez
Today: Steven Van Zandt; Clean Bandit performs; actor Mark McGrath
Kelly & Michael: Actors Jamie Foxx and Zac Efron
The View: Sam Smith performs
The Talk: Actress Poppy Montgomery
Queen Latifah: Rhea Perlman; Jeremy Sisto (``Suburgatory'') (R)
Ellen: Miley Cyrus performs (R)
Primetime:
CW: Cedric the Entertainer hosts the Critics Choice Television Awards
Fox: Hell’s Kitchen’s final 7 Chefs Compete
NBC: Last Comic Standing’s Semi Final Day 2
Late Night:
Jimmy Kimmel: NBA champion Tony Parker; Linkin Park performs
David Letterman: Paul Rudd; comic Jeff Altman; John Doe performs
Jimmy Fallon: George Lopez; Pitbull performs
Craig Ferguson: TV personality Carson Kressley
Seth Meyers: Screenwriter Paul Haggis
Conan: Actor Kevin Hart; actress Rhona Mitra; Atmosphere performs
Bitman
Bitman
By
David
By David Evjen
Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Bitman1@aol.com
Friday,
Thursday,
May
June 29th,
19th, 2009
2014
THE WATERCOOLER…
Forget your kids, tomorrow is "Take Your Dog to Work Day." Pet Sitters
International started the event in 1999 to "celebrate the great companions dogs
make and encourage their adoptions." Procter & Gamble, Amazon and Google are
among some of the big name companies that allow pets in the office not just today,
but every day. Proponents say having pets around boosts morale, relieves stress
and makes employees healthier and calmer, making them much more productive.
Although only 12% of dog owners can bring their pals to the office on a regular
workday, 48% say they would if they could. Experts recommend dog owners also
bring a leash, treats and bowls for food and water.
There’s good news for Robby Gabbert. He’s the soldier who had his girlfriend take
care of his dog while he was deployed to Afghanistan, only to have her sell it on
Craigslist. Robby also went on Craigslist pleading for Baxter the dog’s return. The
ad went viral and a Facebook page was set up to reunite Robby and Baxter, who
was tracked down to another military family in Colorado. However, they didn’t
want to give Baxter up as they said their kids became attached to him. The family
has finally given in and they’ve assured Robby that Baxter will be returned.
You may recall the story of San Marino, California Mayor Dennis Kneier, who
caused a big stink when he was caught on a security camera tossing a bag of dog
poop on his neighbor's lawn. The poop hit the lawn in more ways than one and
after the ensuing outrage the mayor apologized. However, San Marino residents
are apparently not the forgiving type as Mayor Kneier has been forced to resign
over the incident. Mayor Kneier was also cited for littering and will pay a fine.
Bitman
Bitman
By
David
By David Evjen
Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Bitman1@aol.com
Friday,
Thursday,
May
June 29th,
19th, 2009
2014
THE WATERCOOLER 2…
Two officers with the Rosenberg, Texas Police Department have gone viral with
their video lip-synching to Katy Perry's 'Dark Horse,' while on duty. Officers
Aerial Ronell and Ranell Roy say they filmed themselves lip synching because
they wanted to give the "inside scoop" of what goes on in a patrol car. Despite
criticism from those who think that maybe they should be out busting bad guys
instead of making videos, the department is backing them by saying, "See...we
really are no different than anyone else." (See here)
Last week, Tesla announced that everyone could use their patented battery
technology and that move may already be paying off. Nissan and BMW are said to
be interested in cooperating on Tesla’s charging networks. That was the idea
behind the move as Tesla wants its superchargers to become the industry standard.
Right now, Tesla has just 97 charging stations dotting a path across the country,
but they hope to make them nearly as common as gas stations in the not-too-distant
future. If there were more charging stations and they could provide a re-charge in
about the same time as it takes to fill a car with gas, the electric car would become
more practical and Tesla sales would theoretically climb.
California’s 72-year old Wolfgang Zech has run the annual Dipsea foot race 44years in a row. It’s described as a torturous race that goes up and down trails, steep
hills, and hundreds of steps from the town of Mill Valley to Stinson Beach. Not
impressive enough? During this year’s race, Zech started having chest pains but,
thinking he was suffering from heartburn, continued to the finish line. At the end
of the race, Zech went to the emergency room, where stunned doctors told him
he’d just run the Dipsea while having a heart attack. Doctors inserted two stents
into a coronary artery that was 95-percent blocked and Zech says he’ll be back
next year to run in the 45th annual Dipsea.
Bitman
Bitman
By
David
By David Evjen
Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Bitman1@aol.com
Friday,
Thursday,
May
June 29th,
19th, 2009
2014
THE WATERCOOLER 3…
What is the most disliked fast food chain in America? Not everyone is lovin’ it as
McDonald's was named America’s least favorite major fast food chain. Taco Bell
and KFC barely beat out McDonald's to also finish near the bottom. McDonald’s
sales are down and they say the improving economy is partly to blame as more
Americans are able to upgrade to places like TGI Fridays and Applebees.
The World Cup isn’t the only athletic competition going on this month. Japan's Sex
Lube Grand Athlete Meet recently took place in a warehouse in Tokyo. Events
included curling, wrestling, sumo, tug-of-war and a giant ball relay race with the
athletes all covered in the aforementioned lube. More than 100 athletes participated
in the games with an entry fee of around $100, while spectators paid about $30 to
watch. The event was organized by the Sex Lube Sports Association and they’ll
have another competition on July 5th and 6th. (See here)
This beats the heck out of a bear hug! Scientists at the Polish Academy of
Sciences’ Department of Wildlife Conservation have reported observing two male
brown bears performing oral sex on each other 28 times over a period of six years!
Being scientists, they’re not convinced the bears were doing it for pleasure, instead
speculating they just weren’t weaned properly. However, they noted the bear on
the receiving end appeared to reach orgasm as evidenced by muscular contractions
and, um, fluids on the muzzle of the provider.
Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Thursday,
June 19th, 2014
SPORTS SHIRT…
The Los Angeles Dodgers’ Clayton Kershaw threw a no-hitter last night against
the Colorado Rockies. Kershaw struck out 15 and retired the first 18 batters in a
row until a two-base throwing error by shortstop Hanley Ramirez ended his perfect
game bid.
The Washington Redskins have been sacked by the U.S. Patent and Trademark
Office, which has canceled six federal trademark registrations for the name
Washington Redskins. The move was made on the grounds that the football team’s
name is “disparaging to Native Americans” and therefore in violation of federal
trademark laws banning offensive or disparaging language.
Seattle Seahawks cornerback Richard Sherman got into a fight with receiver Phil
Bates during their minicamp yesterday. Both players landed blows to the other's
head, but neither was injured.
Defending champion Spain was eliminated from World Cup competition yesterday
with a 2-0 loss to Chile. While not expected to repeat, the elimination came much
quicker than expected. Cameroon was also eliminated in a 4-0 loss to Croatia.
Nearly 100 rampaging Chilean fans broke through a security checkpoint at Brazil’s
Maracana stadium yesterday, rushing through a large media room and breaking
down walls as they tried to force their way into the sold-out Spain vs. Chile match.
Security eventually contained the fans and they were detained.
Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Thursday,
June 19th, 2014
Scoreboard
Today’s Games
MLB:
American League
Kansas City 2 Detroit 1 Final
Baltimore 2 Tampa Bay 0 Final
Boston 2 Minnesota 1 Final 10
Oakland 4 Texas 2 Final
N.Y. Yankees 7 Toronto 3 Final
L.A. Angels at Cleveland (PPD)
MLB:
American League
L.A. Angels at Cleveland (12:05 PM)
Kansas City at Detroit (1:08 PM)
Toronto at N.Y. Yankees (7:05 PM)
Houston at Tampa Bay (7:10 PM)
Chi. White Sox at Minnesota (8:10 PM)
Boston at Oakland (10:05 PM)
National League
Philadelphia 10 Atlanta 5 Final
Chi. Cubs 6 Miami 1 Final
N.Y. Mets 3 St. Louis 2 Final
Cincinnati 11 Pittsburgh 4 Final
Arizona 4 Milwaukee 3 Final
L.A. Dodgers 8 Colorado 0 Final
National League
Cincinnati at Pittsburgh (12:35 PM)
Milwaukee at Arizona (3:40 PM)
Atlanta at Washington (7:05 PM)
N.Y. Mets at Miami (7:10 PM)
Philadelphia at St. Louis (8:15 PM)
Interleague
Chi. White Sox 7 San Francisco 6 Final
Washington 6 Houston 5 Final
San Diego 2 Seattle 1 Final
Interleague
Seattle at San Diego (6:40 PM)
Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Thursday,
June 19th, 2014
DUH…
In 2010, a developer built a $2 million mansion in the Rhode Island coastal town
of Point Judith with sweeping oceanfront views. Unfortunately, the developer
didn’t build it on the lot he owned, but on land owned by the Rose Nulman Park
Foundation. Unlike the developer, a potential buyer had survey work done and
discovered the error. Not only did the developer lose a sale, the state's Supreme
Court has ruled that the home must be removed. Local media reports it's not clear
yet whether the developer will try to move the structure or demolish it.
Staten Island’s Nickolas Ellias took a bus to go home. Unfortunately, that bus
wound up taking him to jail. That’s because Nickolas didn’t take a bus in the
figurative sense, but literally took it. While the driver was on a break, Nickolas got
behind the wheel and drove it home. The bus was quickly located thanks to its GPS
and Nickolas told police that he wants to be a bus driver and was going to return it
when he was done. If prosecutors didn’t already have enough evidence, a friend of
Nickolas’ that was with him recorded the crime and posted it on Facebook.
An apparently tired 25-year-old Andrew Davoli of Washington Township, New
Jersey decided to sit down for a rest. Unfortunately, Andrew sat down on railroad
tracks. Luckily for Andrew, the inevitable oncoming train knocked him between
the rails, and rolled over him without hitting him again. Andrew told police he
didn’t know how he ended up on the tracks, but explained it all by acknowledging
he’d been drinking. West Deptford Police Chief Samuel DiSimone says, “He got
extremely, extremely lucky.” The chief failed to add extremely, extremely stupid.
If at first you don’t succeed, give up. An unidentified man recently called a
Princeton, New Jersey CVS pharmacy, threatening to detonate three hydrogen
bombs if he didn’t receive 10 $500 prepaid money cards. Princeton police talked to
the caller, informing him he wouldn’t be getting any cards. Upon hearing the
disheartening news, he said, “OK,” and hung up the phone.
Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Thursday,
June 19th, 2014
MO’ DUH…
TV reporter Heather Holmes was sent to Oakland, California to do a report. As she
filed her report, she had her purse stolen from the television truck. Ironically,
Heather was reporting on a violent daylight robbery of a woman. Someone used
Heather’s bank card at a nearby gas station within 20 minutes of the theft, which
took place near Oakland police headquarters.
The Perry family went to Salem, New Hampshire’s Canobie Lake amusement park
for a day of fun. Unfortunately, fun was not had by all when park security said they
couldn’t bring their knives inside. The Perry family became belligerent and Salem
police responded to calm things down. However, it had the opposite effect as the
Perry clan became more irate and began yelling profanities. After several verbal
warnings, an officer attempted to arrest one of the Perry clan, which led to a fight
in which they jumped on the backs of the officers and punched, kicked and
grabbed for their weapons as their mother faked a seizure. Two officers were
injured and the Perry family was taken to jail, where knives are also not allowed.
Union Grove, Alabama parents-to-be Morgan and Breanna Medlock hosted a
gender reveal party to reveal the gender of their unborn baby. The party involved
shotguns loaded with either pink or blue glitter, confetti and ribbon. The discharge
from the guns was pink and the Medlocks baby will be stuck with the right to bear
the name Remmington Sue. Breanna said, “Remington is a gun manufacturer and I
thought surely my husband would go for that.”
An unnamed Vienna, Austria woman caused a car accident. However, the woman
wasn’t driving, but sunbathing in the nude with her legs dangling out her third
floor apartment window. A witness said the woman was obviously keen on getting
some sun in a place where it doesn't usually shine and heard one driver apologizing
to the other, saying he was distracted while pointing up to the woman. The guy
who was hit then said: 'Oh, right, I see what you mean'."
Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Thursday,
June 19th, 2014
HISTORY LESSON…
1856: The first Republican national convention ended in Philadelphia with the
nomination of explorer John Charles Fremont of California for president. He
would lose to Democrat James Buchanan.
1862: Slavery was outlawed in the U.S.
1953: Julius and Ethel Rosenberg were executed for selling atomic secrets to the
Russians.
1964: Senator Edward Kennedy was seriously injured in a plane crash
1964: Congress approved the Civil Rights Act
1977: Elvis Presley made his final live concert recordings in Nebraska.
1978: The comic strip Garfield debuted
1981: Superman II set a then-all-time, one-day box office record of $5.5 million
1987: The Recording Industry reported that for the first time, sales of CDs
surpassed vinyl albums in 1986.
1988: Over 3,000 East Germans gathered at the Berlin Wall to hear Michael
Jackson, who was performing a concert on the Western side
1999: Stephen King was seriously injured when he was hit by a van while walking
near his home in Maine.
1999: Britain's Prince Edward married commoner Sophie Rhys-Jones in Windsor,
England.
Birthday Partiers:
actress Gena Rowlands (Peyton Place, The Notebook, Hope Floats) 84
actress Phylicia Rashad (The Cosby Show, The Wiz) 66
musician Ann Wilson (Heart) 64
actress Kathleen Turner (Body Heat, Moonlight and Valentino, Serial Mom) 60
TV personality Paula Abdul (American Idol, The X Factor) 52
actress Poppy Montgomery (Without A Trace, Unforgettable) 42
actress Zoe Saldana (The Terminal, Avatar, Star Trek) 36
rapper Macklemore 31