Integrated Communication Notes
Chapter 11
The importance of communication in close relationships:
~Close relationships are distinguished by their frequency, intensity, and diversity of
contact as well as their level of intimacy, importance and satisfaction.
Close relationships and the individual:
~1/3 of first marriages end in divorce or separation within 10 years
~Attraction theory
-three forces that draw people together to form relationships: Proximity,
interpersonal attractions, and similarity
-Proximity: the easier it is to interact with someone, the easier it is to develop
and sustain a relationship
-Attractivness: matching hypothesis (the tendency to develop relationships
with people who are approximately as attractive as we are)
-Similarity: The more similar=the more likely the attraction levels rise
~Social Penetration Theory
-communication, self-disclosure is key to relationship development
-Self-disclosure has three dimensions: Breadth, depth, and frequency
-Breadth: number of different topics dyads willingly discuss.
-Depth: how deep or personal communication exchanges are
-Frequency: how often self-disclosure happens
~Uncertainty Reduction Theory
-much of the interaction when we first meet someone is dedicated to
reducing uncertainty and determining whatever we wish to interact with them
again.
~Predicted Outcome Theory
-an attempt to explain how reducing uncertainty can lead to attraction or
repulsion
-three primary dialectical tensions exist in relationships:
Autonomy/connection, expressiveness/privacy, and change/predictability
~Stage models of relationship developments
-Knapps stage model conceptualizes relationship development as a staircase.
- up: initiating, experimenting, intensifying, integrating, and bonding
-down: differentiating, circumscribing, staging, avoiding, and termination
-relational trajectory model: view relationship development as more variable
that previously thought.
~Turning point model of relationship development
-non linear model that best captures the fact that relationship development
can be bidirectional (couples both move toward and away from commitment over
the course of the relationship)
Communicating in friendships and romantic relationships:
~When initiating a potential romantic/sexual relationship, women are typically
more active than men; they use more eye contact, smiles, brief touches, and
grooming behavior to signal interest and attraction..
~Some scholars and journalists suggest that dating no longer exists. Traditional
dating has been replaced by group dating, hook ups, friends with benefits, and
celibacy.
~initiating a conversation is perhaps the most crucial communication skill in
developing friendships
-The idea is to ask questions that can’t be answered with a yes or no or with
only brief responses
~in general studies of relationship maintenance indicate that specific
communication patterns such as joking, spending time talking about one’s day,
encouraging self-disclosure, and expressing commitment to the relationship may
help couples.
~Relational maintenance: behaviors that couples perform that help maintain their
relationships
~Two basic trajectories from ending romantic relationships as well as friendships
are called sudden death and passing away.
~Termination of relationships: 1. Negative identity management, 2. De-escalation, 3.
Justification
~ 5 factors that could end a friendship:lack of communication, rule breaking,
deception, boredom, or other reasons
~relationship dissolvement stragegies: withdrawal/avoidance, Machiavellian
tactics, positive tone, and openness
~Men are more likely to consider leaving the relationship and to become involved
with other women in an attempt to repair their self-esteem; women are more likely
to focus on repairing the relationship
~truth bias: the tendency to not suspect ones intimates deceptions
~sexual coercion: physically nonviolent pressure to engaged in unwanted sex
~marriages typically occur between people of similar religious backgrounds, age,
economic status, weight, education, class, and appearance.
Ethic and close relationships:
~Authentic communication is connected to intimacy
~3 pitfalls of authentic communication: topic avoidance, meaning denial, and
disqualification
Chapter 12
~Conversational learning skills
-listening in conversations requires some strategies…
Conversations should be two sided
Don’t assume
Before speaking ask yourself what message is needed
~Organizing ideas
-chronological order
-spatial orders
~Its is theorized that by the age 2, US American children tend to display basic
empathetic responses through touching, crying, and verbalizing
~Causes for Conflict
-goals to be pursued
-Allocation of resources
-decisions to be made
-behaviors that are considered inappropriate
~Levels of conflict
1. No conflict
2. Latent conflict
3. Problems to solve
4. Dispute
5. Help
6. Flight or fight
7. Intractability
~Conflict smoothing over: seeks above all else to preserve the image that everything
is okay.
~Nonassertive acts: avoidance, accommodation, and soothing over. Persons needs
are not met
~Competition: aggressive act. Person gets what they want at the expense of
someone else
~interrogation: assertive. Getting what you want but not at the expense of someone
else
~Compromise: assertive or nonassertive
~Communitive approaches to managing conflict are assertive communication,
negotiation, arbitration, litigation, and mediation.
~Principles of assertiveness
people are not mind readers
habit is no reason for doing something
you cannot make others happy
disapproval has nothing to do with who you are
take action
do not be victimized
action will only change something
do the best you can
assertiveness comes with consequences
~3 types of assertive response
Simple assertion
Empathetic assertion
Follow up assertion
~DESC: Describing, Expressing, Specifying, and stating Consequences
~Negotiation: the act of bargaining to reach an agreement with at least two people
working on a mutual problem
~4 principles of negotiation:
Prepare in advance
Reframe the questions and the arguments
Respond, don’t react
Identify and alter tactics
~Apologizing
repair the damage
take responsibility
use good timing
show your regret
choose an appropriate conduit
its not about who won or lost
Chapter 13
What makes a group?
1. the number of people must be small enough for everyone to actively
participate
2. the people must be interacting together to achieve common goals
3. the people should be interacting face to face e
4. People should have a number of meetings over an extended period of time
~4 factors that can affect a groups outcome are CULTURE, GENDER, TECHNOLOGY,
and ETHICS.
Types of groups…
1. Learning groups: groups who are involved in collaborative learning are more
motivated to get involved and tend to learn more info from each other
2. Self maintenance groups: groups that work together to maintain their
understanding and use of communication, interpersonal skills and conflict
skills
3. Problem solving groups: group is used regularly by people in business,
education, and healthcare
Individual decision making:
~when fast decisions are needed
~when decisions are fairly simple or will affect only a few people
~When working with others is difficult
Group decisions work best…
~when quality is essential
~when acceptance by a large number of people is needed
~when accuracy is crucial
~when tasks are complex or difficult
~When differing strong opinions and conflicts exist
Optimum group size is considered at maximum participation of 5 people
Decision making methods
1. decision by vote
2. decision by compromise
3. decision by consensus
Group Cohesiveness: quality that causes members of the group to be attracted to the
group and willing to endure despite challenges
1. shared goals
2. group diversity
3. enduring bonds/limited membership
4. competition with another group
Groupthink: members of the group refrain from expressing divergent viewpoints for
fear of being sanctioned or because they the group so much that they don’t want to
risk causing the group any discomfort
Phases:
1. Orientation phase
2. Conflict phase
3. Emergence phase
4. Reinforcement phase
Group processes step 1: Identify the problem
~Question of facts: seeks to determine what the present situation
~Question of conjecture: ask what can be anticipated in the future
~Question of value: evaluating what course of action is best or most worthy
~Question of policy: determine what course of action should be taken
Group processes step 2: Analyze the problem
Force field analysis
1. make a list of pros and cons of specific group idea, decision, desired action, or
plan.
2. Assign points to each force based on its strength
3. Totally the scores to determine if the driving forces or the restraining forces
predominate and discuss what insight they offer to the group and its
problem
Group processes step 3: Establish and Rank Criteria
Group processes step 4: Generate possible solutions
~a method of generating ideas that assure equal participation from all members is
called nominal group technique
Group process step 5: Apply criteria to select best solutions
Group process step 6: Implement and follow up
Chapter 14
Characteristics of effective group members
1. Keep an open mind
2. Preparing and participating effectively
3. Using the problem solving procedures effectively
4. Handling conflicts effectively
Effective member roles
~group roles: are categories of behaviors enacted by individules
Formal roles:
1. agenda setter
2. recorder
Task roles:
1. information/ opinion seeker
2. analyze
3. expediter
4. clarifier
Maintenance Roles:
1. supporter
2. harmonizer
3. tension reliever
4. gate keeper
Dysfunctional roles:
1. Dominator
2. Deserter
3. Blocker and Aggressor
4. Showboat
Power:
1. reward power
2. coercive power
3. legitimate power
4. expert power
5. referent power
Leadership power: process whereby an individual influences a group of individuals
to achieve a common goal
Nominal leader: a person who has been formally designated as the leader or
chairperson
Emergent leader: who acquires influence by performing task or maintenance roles
as needed
Leadership styles:
1. authoritarian leader
2. democracy leader
3. laissez-faire leader
Fred Fiedler came up with the contingency model:
Leader member relations
Task structure
Position power
Hersey and Blanchard came up with the situational model:
When a group is up and and up wolling= Delegate
When a group is up but down unwilling=participant
When a group is down unable but up willing=sell
When a group is down unable and down unwilling =tell