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Who do you have the hardest time getting along with? Why do you think you have such a hard time getting along with that person?

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CHILD- Easiest & Most natural to use- very immature and the least effective. Ex) “I want, You’re so dumb, etc”
› Whining, Yelling, Not Listening, Ordering
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PARENT-This style has NOTHING to do with age or being a father/mother. Directs behaviors- gets someone to comply and gets the point across. Ex)
Giving instructions, demanding, punishing, “Lend me a dollar. Mom, get me a cookie!”
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ADULT-Highest level and most desirable/effective.
Open, two-way communication, trusting others, respecting opinions, controlling emotions. Ex) Think of one you have had 

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Definition: Those used to communicate with oneself
Examples: self-control, self-discipline, accepting responsibilities, self-talk

INTERPERSONAL
SKILLS:
OTHERS

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Definition: Those used to communicate with others
Examples: listening, talking, problemsolving, understanding

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They help us to understand our own behavior
They help us to cope with circumstances of life
They help us to control situations we find ourselves in

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Write a comic (next to the one from yesterday) using the same characters.
This set must also show at least 3 scenes and needs to be about one of the 3 communication styles (child, parent, adult)

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Passive:
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Characteristics: Blushes when someone looks his/her way. Agrees with EVERYONE.
“Yes, you’re right” “I agree.”
Buys from every door-to-door salesman
Uses phrases like “They say”
Takes blame
Makes others feel guilty by letting others walk all over them
Often apologizes in a conversation

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Tells others what he/she wants and then talks them into it
Gets angry when someone disagrees
Rams opinions down people’s throats
Demands for explanations
Very critical
Must be in charge
Gets even with sarcasm
Listens by interrupting

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Buys only what they need
States opinion matter of factly
Negotiates and compromises
Smiles frequently
Takes credit when it’s due
Can admit he/she is wrong
Cooperates well with others
Listens when others speak

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Of the three types, which is the most successful?
What type of person would you want to communicate with?
What kind of communicator are you?

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-Giving positive or encouraging messages
-Asking questions
-Sending clear, concise messages
-Being honest and open
-Keeping the confidences of other people
-Speaking with respect
-Using tact- (communicating something sensitive without hurting or offending)
-Being a good listener

This is talk that “hurts.”
Some messages discourage rather than encourage helpful or constructive communication.

Insults, harassing, teasing
-Gossip, lies, blaming and accusing
-“You” messages
-Sexual Harassment
-Threatening
-Sarcasm- (when a person says one message, but send another message)
-Interrupting or dominating the conversation
-Swearing

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Nonverbal communication is the way a person expresses him/herself through movement, posture, and facial expression. It is possible to send one type of verbal message and at the same time, a different type with body language. Nonverbal communication is
VERY powerful and can often be misinterpreted.

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Use “I” messages!
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I feel ~ makes you responsible for the statement
When ~ Describes the situation
Because ~ tells why you feel the way you do
(This really works!! You should try it!)

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Ask questions
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If you are not clear on what someone is saying….ASK QUESTIONS!!
Restate what someone has said to make sure that you really did understand what they said.
“S0 you are feeling sad because…”

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Be a good listener
- Studies indicate that 60 percent of the time that you communicate is spent listening! If you are a poor listener you are a poor communicator.

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Are you listening?