Communication: Embracing Difference
Dunn & Goodnight
• Chapter 6
• Content messages
• Relational messages
The obvious message, the
actual spoken words.
The hidden message,
usually sent nonverbally.
Reward power
Coercive power
Referent power
Expert power
Legitimate power
1st Stage:
“First contact”
Initiating
Experimenting
3rd Stage:
“A couple”
Intensifying
Integrating
5th Stage:
2nd Stage:
“get acquainted”
4th Stage:
“depend on each other”
Bonding
“Promises Commitment”
* Knapp’s Relational Development Model * Textbook pg. 121 Figure 6.1
1st Stage:
“Independent”
Differentiating
Circumscribing
3rd Stage:
“Stop growing”
Stagnating
Avoiding
5th Stage:
“The break-up”
2nd Stage:
“lose interest”
4th Stage:
“Need time apart”
Terminating
* Knapp’s Relational Development Model * Textbook pg. 121 Figure 6.1
JOHARI WINDOW
Known to self
Not known to self
Benefits of Self-Disclosure
Understanding of self
Known to
others
Not known
to others
1
2
Open
Blind
3
4
Hidden
Unknown
Letting feelings out
Others will begin to share feelings
Cautions of Self-Disclosure
Self-disclose to only those you trust
Look for good listeners
* Textbook pg. 126 Figure 6.2
Pay attention to the environment
Interpersonal Needs Theory – William Shutz
People have certain needs that affects their interpersonal communication
Inclusion needs:
Under social - - - - - Ideal - - - - - Over social
Control Needs:
Abdicrats - - - - - Democrats - - - - - Autocrats
Affection Needs:
Under personal - - - - - Personal - - - - - Over personal
Cost-Benefit Theory – John Thibaut Harold Kelley
People chose to maintain or exit relationships based on rewards they receive from the
relationship.
Relationship Benefits VS. Relationship Costs
Emotional
Emotional Stress
Psychological
Financial Expense
Financial
Time Spent in Relationship
Physical
Physical Abuse
* Valuable tool to assess relationships
• Expressed struggle between both parties
• Incompatible goals
• Factors that contribute to conflict:
–
–
–
–
Denial
Suppression
Aggression
Status
* Textbook pg. 135 Table 6.2
• Deal with feelings
• Find special time to meet
• Keep the discussion focused on the problem
• Use perception checking and empathetic listening
• Find a solution for both parties: Be flexible