MY HEART BLEEDS!
If you've seen the 2001 horror film Valentine, you'd be forgiven for being perhaps a little
wary of celebrating this February 14. Or maybe you're unwillingly single? In which case,
Valentines Day is hardly likely to be an occasion you mark on the calendar. But what about
those unfortunate few who have a genuine fear of love, romance and all the sensual things
connected with this particular day? For these people, even something as seemingly harmless
as being in love can induce sweating, shortness of breath, an irregular heartbeat and nausea.
Valentines day? It's more like Halloween!
Phobias associated with Valentines Day range from Ereuthrophobia (a fear of blushing) to
Philemaphobia (a fear of kissing) and the one which many men would like to be able to claim:
Obligaphobia (a fear of commitment)!
Many of us have at one time or another experienced heartbreak in our lives; love itself seems
to be quite a risky business but imagine being scared to even fall in love to begin with?
Sufferers of Philophobia are diagnosed as having “an abnormal, persistant and unwarranted
fear of falling in love.” It may seem rather obscure on the surface but when you realise that a
lot of the people who suffer from this have often had to confront particularly emotional
turmoil relating to love in their pasts, it all seems to make a lot more sense.
What about sufferers of Hedonophobia? The abnormal, excessive and persistent fear of
experiencing pleasure could render Valentines Day especially useless, single or not. These
poor folk typically feel guilty about partaking in any activity which will give them a feeling of
pleasure even though they rationally realise they are doing nothing wrong. Feelings of guilt
are spurred by the realisation that others are experiencing grief and hardship while they are
having fun. Or not, as the case may be!
Other phobias associated with Valentines Day include:
 Gamophobia – fear of marriage.
 Zelophobia – fear of jealousy.
 Erotophobia – fear of physical love!
 Haphephobia – fear of touching or being touched.
 Androphobia – fear of men.
 Gynophobia – fear of women.
Imagine suffering from one of these and trying to enjoy a romantic Valentines Day with your
significant other! And guys, if you're planning on a classic romantic gesture, make sure the
object of your affection doesn't suffer from Anthrophobia (fear of flowers) or Xocolataphobia
(fear of chocolate) and if she does, save your money and why not spend it on a bottle of wine
to share for the special day? As long as neither of you suffer from Oenophobia, that is!
Frankly, what's the point? Even if you don't have a rare and unfortunate phobia which
makes Valentines Day a struggle, there's always the big risk you take whenever letting anyone
have access to your heart and we daily gamble with our own happiness for the chance to be
loved. OK, so when the gamble pays off it's great but how many of the estimated 1.92 million
people who will be single this year on February 14 will be untimely reminded of love they
had and lost and the lingering bad taste it leaves in the mouth? Saint Valentine seems to have
a lot to answer for!
Having said that, we are undeniably creatures of hope. So if you find yourself suffering for any
reason at all this Valentines Day, don't despair because all is never lost. Bear in mind the words of
American writer Richard Bach:
“The worst lies are the lies we tell ourselves. We live in denial of what
we do, even what we think. We do this because we're afraid. We fear
we will not find love, and when we find it we fear we'll lose it. We fear
that if we do not have love we will be unhappy.”
Maybe we should all stop being afraid and start enjoying ourselves and our lives, and make
the most of the hand we have been dealt. There's always someone worse off. Just think, you
could be a sufferer of Optophobia and be afraid to open your eyes. That would make waking
up every morning a nightmare indeed!
END