MCWelch-Dearest-as we said, this shows huge improvements in your writing skills. I am so proud of your progress. I think your essay could be used as a starting point for your college applications. Everything in yellow means “I object” or “yuk” or “seriously?” I gave you a 93 on the Exam and a 87 on your paper so you have a B for the course.
Again, I am very proud of you and I will miss you so much next year. How odd will it be not to have you in class? Take care.
Mrs. Hackelman
Despite signs that China has relaxed on their strict laws, many Chinese officials, including Minister of the State Commission of Population and Family Planning, Zhang
Weiqing, have said no plans of ending the One Child Policy have been set.
7. The gender imbalance in some places can be very extreme, especially in severe poverty stricken areas. According to Ansley J. Coale and Judith Banister, "A missionary (and naturalist) observer in [China] in the late nineteenth century interviewed 40 women over age 50 who reported having borne 183 sons and 175 daughters, of whom 126 sons but only 53 daughters survived to age 10; by their account, the women had destroyed 78 of their daughters." In the Hainan province, boys now outnumber girls by 3 to 1. As well as in Fujian, where for every 135 boys 100 girls exists. Jonathan Manthorpe of the Chinese
Academy of Social Sciences said that "The imbalance between the sexes is now so distorted that there are 111 million men in China, more than three times the population of
Canada, who will not be able to find a wife."
8. In November 1999, the use of cell phones implicated to three fatal accidents. Early
November, a distracted driver using his cell phone, killed two-year-old Morgan Pena.
Morgan’s mother, Patti Pena, reports that the driver “Ran a stop sign at 45 mph, roadside my vehicle and killed Morgan as she sat in her car seat.” A week later, Corrections
Officer Shannon Smith, while guarding prisoners on the side of the road, was killed by a woman distracted by a cell phone call (Besthoff). Naval Academy midshipman crashed into John and Carole Hall’s parked car on Thanksgiving weekend, killing them both in the same month of the other incidents. During court the driver said that by the time he looke 䡃䭎䭗 ⁓
parked car on Thanksgiving weekend, killing them both in the same month of the other incidents. During court the driver said that by the time
April 31, 2009
English 1111/1112
1. The United Nations should monitor how governments spend their money and what they spend the money on, in order to prevent government currency from being spent on

personal desires.
2. The United Nations exaggerated the severity of AIDS, as well as skewed the number of actual AIDS patients worldwide, in order to receive more donations than they deserved.
3. American high school runners do not put forth the hard work nor demonstrate the work ethic needed to be great at what they do.
4. Kenyan runners follow a diverse practice schedules that combine novice runs with rigorous ones to maintain a high level of oxygen efficiency and performance.
5. Muscles are amazing designs. The muscles working together can compare to a symphony in concert. Muscles can only pull, therefore they work in pairs to pull back and forth. Comprised of slow and quick response muscle fibers, muscles can result in customized routines, enabling a target to a specific muscle type. Slow twitch fibers help in high endurance exercises. Contrasting with the slow twitch fibers, the fast twitch muscle gives off a quick and powerful movement associated with strength and speed. In essence, everyone needs a routine that will coincide with their fitness goals. Whether your a power lifter or a long distance swimmer, this system customizes anyone
fibers, the fast twitch muscle gives off a quicMcKenzie Welch
Hackelman
April 31, 2009
English 1111/1112
Duplicate/No worries
1. The United Nations should monitor how governments spend their money and what they spend the money on, in order to prevent government currency from being spent on personal desires.
2. The United Nations exaggerated the severity of AIDS, as well as skewed the number of actual AIDS patients worldwide, in order to receive more donations than they deserved.
3. American high school runners do not put forth the hard work nor demonstrate the work ethic needed to be great at what they do.
4. Kenyan runners follow a diverse practice schedules that combine novice runs with rigorous ones to maintain a high level of oxygen efficiency and performance.
5. Muscles are amazing designs. The muscles working together can compare to a symphony in concert. Muscles can only pull, therefore they work in pairs to pull back and forth. Comprised of slow and quick response muscle fibers, muscles can result in

customized routines, enabling a target to a specific muscle type. Slow twitch fibers help in high endurance exercises. Contrasting with the slow twitch fibers, the fast twitch muscle gives off a quick and powerful movement associated with strength and speed. In essence, everyone needs a routine that will coincide with their fitness goals. Whether your a power lifter or a long distance swimmer, this system customizes anyone’s needs.
6. Deng Xiaoping said in the year 1979 “Use whatever means you must to control
China’s population, just do it, with the support of the Central Chinese Communist Party, you have nothing to fear”. Created by China’s then leader Deng Xiaoping, China’s One
Child Policy helped China’s population decrease. Initially this policy was supposed to last for a temporary amount of time, but insd up from dialing on the cell phone, he had reached three feet from the car and had no time to stop (Stockwell B8).
11. In order to maintain a safe community within the United States, cease organized crime, and diminish sexual predators the government should monitor the usage of personal web pages such as Myspace and Facebook. Still not there. Make sure your verbs match the subject, the government must reduce the power of organized crime and prevent sexual predators……..
12. The discrimination against one’s skin color and modern day culture demonstrates the practice of racism. Racism in today’s society exists on a scale of citizens believing that they themselves mandate superiority over other ethnic groups.
13. Students who participate in immoral actions such as cheating become more susceptible to committing the same heinous act later in their educational career, as well as in their workplace which can lead to termination, making it more difficult to be trusted and relied on among a workforce.
14. During the sixteen years of my life I have faced a numerous amount of obstacles but amongst them all, auditioning for North Carolina School of the Arts was the most difficult. The challenge forced me to open my eyes to new techniques of dance, push my endurance to the extreme, and seek for my inner self.
15. The professor will review the report before it is sent to the secretary.
16. Mark found numerous errors in the excel spread sheet, but steps have been taken to correct them.
17. Robby can be reached at 712 288-1144, if you have an questions.
18. With the current transcript attached, I have highlighted the important classes and credits.
19. It will not be possible to know the opinions of our students until the survey responses have been collected and tabulated.
20. I managed a group of six lazy people.
21. Susie, now a junior for the third time, has a nice personality.
22. Because the strong king lacked in writing skills, he got beheaded.
23. No way can I write a sentence without using the form “to be”, correct?

24. The silliest group of girls on campus live across the street.
25. Because he lacked in doing his homework during the school year, Jeff earned himself a mandated stay in summer school.
26. The President of the United States, Barack H. Obama, loves his dog named Bo.
27. Mrs. Hackelman blamed the boys for cheating on the test she gave us.
28. With the class being afraid to write strong sentences, their nervousness about earning a bad grade for the semester has reached a high.
29. “Has anyone found the money promised to the family attending the trip? This trip could possibly be the last one given.
Essay- What effect has any research, reading or study, work in the arts, science project, had on your intellectual and personal growth in recent years? Discuss what influence this involvement has had on your academic goals. (UNC-Chapel Hill)
During my four year attendance in the preparatory ballet program at North
Carolina School of the Arts, I gained a sufficient amount of intellectual and personal lessons along my journey. From the experience of being in a prestigious program at such a young age, my exposure to the encouragement of seeking for one’s inner individuality came first in my personal growth. Surrounded by students acquiring themselves in music, theatre, design, dance, and art came as a culture shock on many levels yet molded my immature and naive mind into one that was optimistic and open-minded. Having attended the North Carolina School of the Arts for four years, successfully enrolled in the preparatory ballet program, I have discovered much more about myself than I would have had I not pursued any fine arts at all. Yet in choosing to pursue the arts I have developed a sense of precise artistic imagination, a gain personal humility, and a exceptionally advanced achievement in ballet technique, further encouraging me to pursue a higher education at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill.
Before auditioning for the preparatory program at NCSA, I was convinced that my technique in dance was far more advanced than others attending the school at my age.
Little did I know that when I stepped foot onto the dance room floor that first day that the rest of the attendees were on the same technical level as myself. I had walked into a new world. Something I had never seen, since my previous experiences were only in studio dance. My humility completely overrode my cockiness within seconds. As time progressed I became attentive and curious on how I could improve my technical skills in order to merely touch the outskirts of the level of dance students pursue while enrolled.
This humility I gained from being at the NCSA has influenced my academic goals for
UNC-Chapel Hill, by encouraging me to be more respectful of teachers with higher educations and further experience. I have opened the doors to excelling in academic achievements through enrolling in challenging courses at school and participating in assignments that challenge my academic thought process. All in which to continue to excel in my academic achievements and goals for my future education.
If chosen to attend University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, I can insure my academic goals will continue to outshine the rest and strive to go above and beyond.
Through my experience at North Carolina School of the Arts, I have developed a sense of artistic imagination, a gain in personal humility, and an exceptional level of technique in the dance department. Without the arts being apart of my life in previous years and

existing still today, I might not portray the qualities at such a prestigious and gifted level that they are today. If chosen to attend UNC-Chapel Hill, I can assure that my academic goals will be at an ultimate elevation and will prosper onward after my undergraduate career has finished.