Elements Chemistry Joke

What did Mike say when he heard magnesium
and oxygen were dating?
• …is an unchangeable substance.
• …can’t be broken down into simpler substances.
• …is the building block of all matter.
Remember matter has a mass and takes up space.
Where do you put a dead chemist?
Elements combine to form all the different substances
(matter) in the world.
Where do you put dirty dishes?
Chemical Property Definition: A chemical property
is a property or behavior of a substance when it
undergoes a chemical change or reaction.
Examples: flammability, poisoning, rusting
Physical Property Definition: The measurement of a physical
property may change the arrangement of matter in a
sample, but not the structure of its molecules.
Examples: mass, density, boiling and melting points & volume
What show do cesium and iodine love
to watch together?
Dmitry Mendelyev create d the first periodic table in 1869.
He recognized that certain elements share the same chemical
Properties so he grouped them together on his version of the
table. The ones that were most alike were grouped in the
same column. He called these similar columns Groups.
When he arranged his version of the table, he noticed their
were gap in the table. This lead him to predict that an
undiscovered element would fit in this spot with similar
Alkali Metals- column 1—Very reactive and explosive in water.
Alkaline Earth metals-Reactive with other elements,
the lighter element are go for you. Example: Calcium
Metals-there are 4 main characteristics of Metal, one is
how well it conducts electricity.
Halogens-very reactive, often combining with metals
and Alkali metals
Noble Gas-will not react with any element on the periodic table.
What kind of weapon did the chemist
More from potassium, Nickel and Iron?
Thanks to Mendeleyev, he gave us a table that organizes
the elements from simplest to most complex.
What is “HIJKLMNO”?
Sun is 75% hydrogen, 0.9% oxygen.
Iron is the most abundant element in the earth at 35%,
28% oxygen.
The Earth’s Atmosphere is 78% Nitrogen,
21% Oxygen.
The ocean is 85% Oxygen, followed by 11% Hydrogen.
You are made of 65% Oxygen, followed by carbon at 18%.
How did the date between oxygen
and potassium go?
Because billions of years ago, ago huge star
exploded leaving behind dust and gas. Thanks to
gravity this dust and gas (the 90 known elements)
came together to form our sun and planets.
If H2O is the chemical formula for
water, what is the formula for ice?
Carbon, Hydrogen and oxygen make up carbohydrates
(sugars and starches) and Lipids (fats).
Carbon, Hydrogen, Oxygen, and nitrogen make up proteins.
90% of living matter is made of these 4 elements.
What did the comic say when he
Was asked if he had any jokes about
Because the there are infinite combinations of those 90 elements.
Where do you put a dead chemist?