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Kiley Zwick
Mr. D’Agostino
Marriage, Family & Commitment, Father
12 April 2013
LLG 6 Outline
I.
Evaluate how the different parenting/childrearing philosophies impact a child’s
development.
A. “The interaction of many specific actions and attitudes on the part of parents
come together to affect a child’s development.” (Gurian)
B. Types of parenting styles:
1.Authoritarian: “extremely strict, parents are highly controlling. They
dictate how their children should behave. They stress obedience to
authority and discourage discussion. They are demanding and directive.
They expect their orders to be obeyed and do not encourage give-and-take.
They have low levels of sensitivity and do not expect their children to
disagree with their decisions.” (Gurian)
a. “Research reveals that adolescents of authoritarian parents learn
that following parental rules and adherence to strict discipline is
valued over independent behavior. As a result, adolescents may
become rebellious or dependent.” (Kopko)
2.Authoritative: “moderate, parents set limits and rely on natural
consequences for children to learn from making their own mistakes.
Authoritative parents explain why rules are important and why they must
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be followed. They reason with their children and consider the children’s
point of view even though they might not agree. They are firm, with
kindness, warmth and love. They set high standards and encourage
children to be independent.” (Gurian)
a. “Research demonstrates that adolescents of authoritative parents
learn how to negotiate and engage in discussions. They understand
that their opinions are valued. As a result, they are more likely to
be socially competent, responsible, and autonomous” (Kopko)
3.Permissive: “indulgent, parents are accepting and warm but exert little
control. They do not set limits, and allow children to set their own rules
and schedules and activities. They do not make demands about behavior
as authoritarian or authoritative parents do.” (Gurian)
a. “Research findings show that adolescents of permissive parents
learn that there are very few boundaries and rules and that
consequences are not likely to be very serious. As a result, teens
may have difficulty with self-control and demonstrate egocentric
tendencies that can interfere with proper development of peer
relationships.” (Kopko)
4.Uninvolved: “demand little and respond minimally. In extreme cases, this
parenting style might entail neglect and rejection.” (Gurian)
a. “Research supports that adolescents of uninvolved parents learn
that parents tend to be interested in their own lives and less likely
to invest much time in parenting. As a result, teens generally show
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similar patterns of behavior as adolescents raised in permissive
homes and they may also demonstrate impulsive behaviors due to
issues with self-regulation.” (Kopko)
B. In general, research has proved that the most well-developed children are children
who were reared by authoritative parents who set rules and demands, but respect
their child’s opinions and emotions. This allows the child to develop a sense of
independence (Gurian).
II.
Propose what a healthy parent-child relationship might look like.
A. Mutual respect between parent and child, friendship but the parent still sets rules
and child obeys them, parent and child are able to discuss situations without the
parent telling the child what to do.
B. Tips for a healthy parent-child relationship
1.“Focus on your own parenting skills and behavior…What can you do to
keep your own reactions in check and be the adult in the relationship?
Consider ways that you can remain calm and still authoritative as you
connect with your child…Consistency and honesty are two absolutes as
you develop your parent-child relationship because you want the bedrock
of the relationship build on your core values and principles” (Gatty)
2.“Respect your child…As your child grows, help them to make their own
choices. You may not always agree with these decisions, but let them
learn and grow…As the child grows, grow with the child. If you listen—
really listen—your child is likely to talk…Model pride in what your child
is trying to accomplish and respect his efforts.” (Gatty)
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3.“Share time with your child…Believe it or not, the childhood years fly by.
If you’re spending a majority of your time preoccupied with work, you’ll
miss out on experiences that can’t be replaced…Parent-child relationships
deepen over time. Be patient, and see what you can learn from your child
each day.” (Gatty)
4.“Make your child a priority in your life…Let them know that they are a
priority but that they are not in control of you. It’s a delicate balance but
you, as a parent, still need to be in charge of your own emotions.” (Gatty)
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Reflection
I have learned a lot about how different parenting styles affect the development of a
child, as well as how to create a healthy parent-child relationship from researching for this LAP
learning goal. I learned that the best way to parent a child is through the authoritative style,
which allows the child to develop a sense of independence but still have rules to follow. If
parents are too strict with their children, it could lead the child to rely too heavily on the parents,
or it could lead the child to rebel against the parents. If parents are too lenient with their
children, it could lead a child to be egocentric and have social problems later in life. If I have
children in the future, I think that I would definitely use the authoritative parenting style. I also
learned that, in order to have a healthy parent-child relationship, parents should be respectful of
their child and his or her opinions, set a good example for the child, and spend time with the
child to let them know that they are a priority. This project was very insightful to me in that it
helped me to learn some of the best ways to parent a child.