Carmen Khalil
Dempster
11/11/15
Univ 112
Research Paper
What Causes Human Attraction? Is the reasoning more biological or physical? How has this idea
evolved over time? How does this cause sex addiction?
Attraction is inevitable. At the age of 10, hormones in the body begins to develop and
creates the first signs of sexual desires. As people age, these desires heavily increase. Many
factors play in attraction such as the person’s mental state, seeking a long- term relationship or
short term- relationship, or even a women’s menstrual cycle. There are many gender differences
in human attraction as men and women get attracted differently. However, sexuality doesn’t
cause any additional differences in attraction. Sexual desire can become to the extent that isn’t
controllable for an individual to handle. This can lead to having a sex addiction and even other
disorders. Theories of human attraction have evolved over time and I have found them to show
an in depth outlook on what attraction is. Human attraction can be a problem in a human’s life as
it can be hard to control sexual desire.
According to Charles Darwin, who created the first theory of human attraction, human
attraction is divided into two sub-categories, inrasexual and intersexual. Intrasexual, females
choice, and Intersexual, male’s selection (Buss 616). Intrasexual tends to be males, as they use
the tactics of talking about materialist things and “showing off” while trying to attract a female.
In several studies of observing how males and females attempt to attract the opposite sex,
multiple patterns were noticed. Men more than women appear to act “promiscuous, display
strength, display athleticism, and show off.” (Buss 619) or they will even “purchase a woman a
nice dinner, talk about lifting weights, display a superior vocabulary, offer help, and mentioning
financial independence” (Buss 619). These results relate back to males being intrasexual
because they constantly talk about the materialist aspects about their personality or life to attract
a women. A women will try to attract a man in a different way than this. It was concluded that
women often use the “act nice tactic” (Buss 618) or will “act coy or promiscuous” (Buss 618) or
may even adjust their appearance by “wearing sexy clothes” (Buss 618). These are prime
examples of the differences between how males and females try to attract a mate and why they
are categorized differently by Darwin in terms of attraction. As these show what the individual
does to attract, others show what an individual seeks to be attracted.
A short-term relationship can be anything from a fling or a hookup to just talking to
someone for a short period of time where as a long-term relationships is a lot more serious.
Males and females both share common desires in any relationship. During short term
relationships, researchers found that “men's preference for physical attractiveness in short-term
mates approached the ceiling of the rating scale” (Schmitt 211). This is because men seek a more
“shiny” mate during a short term relationship, they value more of the physical qualities of a
women than in a long term relationship. Schmitt’s study showed that for a short term mate, “2/3
of men’s standards were significantly lower than the women’s” (Schmitt 214). Similar results
occurred for women as they “highly valued men spending a lot of money on them and getting
gifts for them during a short term relationship (Schmitt 222)”. Both genders appreciate a relaxed
and ultimately beneficial time during a short term relationship. However, during a long term
relationship, results for women’s ideal mate showed “high numbers for having a promising
career, having good financial prospects, likely to earn a lot of money, and has a reliable future”
(Schmitt 225). This is because women want to make sure they are choosing someone who make
their life stable and that they ultimately won’t have a bad life. Similar findings for male during
long relationships as they “highly value a commitment, loyalty, and faithful during a long term
relationship” (Schmitt 214). These characteristics are complete opposite from their short term
desires as men seek a serious long term relationship.
Findings show that any person seeks a mate who displays “humor, good manners,
sympathy, and good grooming” (Buss 620). These characteristics are universal as every person
wants to feel free and loved in the relationship. A scientist Buss examined the “Baxter’s 8
relationship criteria” which is 8 basic criteria that every relationship relies on. The 8 criteria is
“autonomy/personal freedom, loyalty and good faith, honesty and openness, similarities, mutual
support, time together, shared resources and efforts, and the feeling of something special
together”( Buss 367). These 8 criteria is the foundation of relationships.
As there are similarities in relationships, there are differences, and is no right or wrong
answer because every person is different. Freud and Jung proposed that people seek in mates
characteristics “that resemble images or archetypes of their opposite-sex parent” or people seek
in mates characteristics that “they themselves lack: a search for complementarity” or people even
seek “similarity in mates: that likes attract likes” (Schmitt 200). In another research, Perrett
found that the more “similar a man’s face was to the women’s face, the higher she ranked his
face in attractiveness and that men are attracted to “a little of their own face blended into the face
of a women” (Perrett 201-202). This shows that both males and females find mates attractive that
somewhat resemble themselves and that every person has a person preference. When it comes to
human attraction there is no “right or wrong” because every person is different. Every individual
has his/her own preferences and these are just some of the preferences. There is no right or
wrong theory as it is unique to the person.
Hormones have a lot to do with attraction and development. Sexual attraction is affected
by hormones and new data indicates that a significant hormonal event is around age 10. Since the
adrenal glands begin to mature at an early age, children experience their first sexual attractions at
an early age as well. As the adrenal glands mature, more hormones are released which cause
children to feel sexual attractions. Changes, such as girls wearing “ornate earrings or boys
forming preteenage groups, may occur around age 10” (Herdt 181). At the age of 10 a lot of
biological changes happen, including hormones. These are some suddle changes that women and
men do has their bodies are changing. This is a problem because at the age of 10, the person is
still a child and isn’t able to control emotions and sexual desires. A big hormone for women is
the menstrual cycle. During the menstrual cycle, “women’s attitude to faces change, show an
increased attraction to the smell of the same male sex pheromone” and are attracted to “selfresembling faces during the last two weeks of menstrual cycle” (Herdt 114). Menstrual cycle has
a lot of hormonal changes happening in the women’s body and this causes changes in attraction.
Women are more likely to not be able to control their sexual desires during their menstrual cycle.
The more hormones flowing in the body, the less likely women can control their urges. Women
are also highly attracted to men’s hormone testortone. Testortone is highest in morning on
waking and can drop “by 40% by midday” (Herdt 108) The higher the testortone, the more
females are attracted to the male. The higher the testortone, the less likely a female can control
themselves.
Attraction can lead to sex addiction and other major problems due to lack of control of
one’s desires. Scientists Barth and Kinder describe it as “a lack of control over erotic impulses”
(Barth & Kinder 349). Once a person’s desire exceeds a certain limit, it becomes hard to control
them. People who are sex addicts tend to damage their intimate relationships as it is hard for the
partner to live up to those demands. Many factors play into being able to control one’s sexual
desires. Mental aspects such as feeling “loneliness, low self-esteem, and anxiety” (Carnes 349)
cause the person to be less able to control the desires. The incessant need is because of a desire to
relief from psychic distress. This is similar to drug addicts needing to be temporary relieved by
doing the drug. Sex addicts characteristics differ from men and women. It is found that male sex
addicts outnumber female sex addicts (Carnes 350). Men tend to have a more uncontrollable
personality and can be more erotic. A male’s sex addiction can drive him intro multiple affairs
with other women and lowering one’s standards. A male with a sex addiction can also become
homosexual or bisexual in order to have more possible sexual mates. On the other hand,
women’s sex addict tend to “manifest itself in frequent dangerous sexual encounters with
strangers” (Carnes 350). Women have a sense of guilt afterword’s which is why they rather
pursue their desires with someone who they will probably never see again. Women’s addiction
grows over a period of time and increases in addiction. The person’s first time behavior is
sporadic but then becomes a routine. Sexual addicts act on compulsion and develop a
compulsion disorder. An increase desire in sex can have other issues besides compulsion and
being an addict.
Sex addiction is the start but it can manifest into other problems. A person who begins to
have uncontrollable urges can overall become a very inappropriate person and may not be able to
fit in society/ interact with other people. Sex addiction can turn into sexual dysfunctions because
the more they have intercourse, the less they can benefit from it. Some clinical conditions that
may form are “anorgasmia- not having orgasms, inhibited sexual desire, sexual aversion- fear of
sex, ejaculatory incompetence, or erectile insufficiency” (Carnes 354). These are just some
clinical conditions that may arise in the person’s body from too much sex. These conditions
inhibit the person from having “normal sex”/ the normal results from sex such as pleasure and
sensational feelings.
Attraction to another person causes an interest in them, emotionally and sexually.
Attraction is found to be the different amongst genders but the same in each gender, regardless of
sexuality. There are some common traits that every person is attracted to but ultimately a
person’s preference decides the attraction. Culture, environment, and hormones play a huge role
in attraction as it influences a person’s beliefs which results in what he/she is attracted to. What a
person seeks, whether short term or long term relationship influences the person’s attraction. A
person tends to seek a more materialistic person for a short term relationship and a more mature
and stable person for a long term relationship. Regardless of the relationship, males tend to seek
a less in characteristic in a mate than a female. Females ensure that their mate will be able to
provide and support for them and males just want someone pretty and supportive. The more a
person is emotionally drawn to a person, the more sexually drawn they are to them. This is a
problem as a person can like someone else to the extent that his/her sexual desires and is beyond
the person’s control. Lacking of control of sexual desire results in ruining relationships as well as
overall character. The person becomes erotic and compulsive as well extremely inappropriate.
These kinds of people cannot interact with society as it is difficult to talk to them and it is
difficult for the addict to have conversations other than sex. Sex addiction can lead to other
mental disorders that inhibits the person from having pleasurable sex. One can conclude that
human attraction is overall weighed more with biological factors but other environmental factors
influence it. Also, that as attraction and sexual desires increase, it is more likely for people to
become a sex addict which is why people should always be cautious and controlled with their
actions, to prevent addiction.