Chapter 28, Readiness for Marriage
Theories of Attraction
1. Many studies have found that people choose mates that are like themselves.
This is the basis of _____________________________________ (sameness).
2. Three levels of homogamy:
a.
b.
c.
3. The expression opposites attract may be a comment on a pattern of attraction.
This theory is called __________________________________________ _______________________. It
says that people select others who complete, or complement, their personality
needs.
Example:
4. ________________________________________________________________ -- related to the costs and
rewards of the relationship. The belief that people ask themselves what they want in
a mate; they look at material resources, personal qualities, and skills; then they look
at what they can offer in return.
5. ____________________________________________ - This theory means people are more apt
to meet and get to know and stay with others who are physically close by. (Linked to
social exchange theory) ____________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________________________________________
6. ___________________________________________________ - with this theory, people have a
mental image of an ideal mate based on appearance, character, or other traits.
7. ____________________________________________ - people pick a mate when the time is
right. (may be after graduating high school or college, or when they are established
in a career). A person may have had many suitable mates over the years, but none
were right until the time was right.
8. _______________________________________________ - puts some of the other theories of mate
selection together and explains how a couple moves toward marriage. A person
chooses another according to several criteria. Each choice narrows the field. The
filters are:
a.
b.
c.
d.
e.
Choose the Right Partner
1. _______________________________ is those traits and conditions that show whether a
person is prepared for marriage. Questions about readiness need to be asked and
answered early.
2. ___________________ - up to a point, the older two people are at the time of their
wedding, the more apt the marriage is to be stable. Added years bring more
___________________________________________________. This effect levels off at about age
_________ for men and _____________ for women.
3. Independence: _________________________________________________________________________
_________________________________. Look at your own level of independence in readiness
for marriage. And remember to ask the questions about a potential partner.
***_________________________________________________________________________________________.
Otherwise, one person may rely too much on the partner. Or both may depend too
much on their families.
4. ______________________________________________ should not be a main reason for choosing
a mate. However, parental input can be very helpful.
5. _______________________________________________________ is essential to the success of a
marriage.
Warning Signs
Some conditions can encourage couples to move forward with their relationship,
other factors should make them put on the brakes.
6. _______________________________ - may be physical or emotional; it shows a partner’s
inability to handle problems in a mature way.
7. ________________________________ is watchfulness in guarding a relationship with a
loved one. Jealous people see their actions as signs of love. Their behavior is a
_____________________________________________________________________________________________.
They show a complete lack of trust in their partners.
8. __________________________________________ is emotional, poorly reasoned, and can be
hurtful. May even lead to physical abuse. Argument does not solve a problem.
___________________________________________ is honest, thoughtful, respectful, and sticks to
the subject; it leads to compromise and resolution.
9. Some important qualities that make a relationship work:
a.
b.
c.
A Realistic Attitude
10. Love alone is not enough to solve the problems that married life brings. You
must have a strong belief in the ___________________________________________________________.
(marriage as a way of living) You must believe marriage is worth preserving in
society.
11. Important points to help you think realistically about marriage and potential
marriage partners:
a.
b.
c.
d.
Your choice of a spouse will influence most of the other decisions you make
throughout life. It will impact the kind of lifestyle you create.