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HOW TO FIX A
FOUR-PAGE BRIEFING NOTE
The Challenge................................................................................................ 2
Option 1: Edit Rigorously ........................................................................... 3
Option 2: Delete Unneeded Text ................................................................ 4
Option 3: Use Attachments ......................................................................... 6
Option 4: Treat the Memo As If It Were An Attached Briefing Note.... 9
Links to Attachments.................................................................................. 10
In A Pinch .................................................................................................... 11
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The Challenge
Many departments limit memos to the minister and
memos to the deputy minister to two pages. It is sound
practice. But you have a draft that comes out to four.
What can you do to fix it?
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Option 1: Edit rigorously.
To fix a four-page memo, one option is to edit the
content vigorously to reduce it to the bare essence.
This takes time and thought, but the result can be a
dramatic improvement.
You’ll find an example of this in the section on
Substance vs. Froth. You’ll find other tips on how to do
this in these sections:
•
•
•
•
Relevance
Abstract vs. Concrete
Short Words
Active Verbs
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Option 2: Delete unneeded text.
Another option is to delete any text that is not
absolutely necessary.
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That leaves you with a two-page memo:
However, you’ve also lost a lot of information. What if you think that it is important to
keep that material?
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Option 3: Use attachments.
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You could keep that text by
moving it from the memo
into attached briefing notes.
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Thus leaving you with . . .
a two-page memo
plus . . .
plus . . .
a two page
briefing note
and . . .
you haven’t lost a word
of the original text.
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a one-page
briefing note
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If you use Option 3, bear in mind that the minister is
unlikely to read the attached briefing notes. The
minister’s advisors might read them, but the minister
will not in most cases.
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Option 4: Treat the memo as if it
were a briefing note.
A fourth option is to treat the four-page memo
as if it were actually an attached briefing
note. Then, distill the essence of that briefing
note into a two-page memo. For tips on doing
this, see the sections on Abstract vs. Concrete
and Substance vs. Froth.
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LINKS TO THE
BRIEFING NOTES
When you attach briefing notes, you will need to use
connectors in the memo to link it with the attachments.
Here are two examples:
Attachment 1 explains how this
came about.
Attachment 2 summarizes the
discussions at the meeting and
lists those who attended.
In forming links, it is often helpful to use
relatively abstract words in condensing material
that used to be in the memo. Here is an example
(the abstract words are underlined):
Attachment 1 sets out
the pros and cons of the
project.
If you wanted to provide slightly more concrete
detail while still keeping the bulk of the text in
the briefing note, you could write the following:
Arguments in favour of the project include effectiveness and ease of
implementation. Arguments against include cost and possible overlap with
provincial jurisdiction. Attachment 1 gives details on these arguments.
The concrete details replacing “the pros and cons” are underlined.
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IN A PINCH
There will be times when you are in a pinch and you need to save just a line or two to
keep the memo to two pages. Here are several ways you could do this:
1. Look for paragraphs whose last line is just a word or two long. Then study those
paragraphs to see if rigorous editing might cut out a word or two to gain that line.
Using short words and active verbs can help a lot here.
2. Look for opportunities to eliminate some details by replacing them with an abstract
term.
3. See if you can save a line by moving acronyms or text from the subject line to the
opening paragraph, or vice versa.
4. Look for acronyms that appear only twice in the memo. The first time an acronym is
used, it must be spelled out in full, followed by the acronym in parentheses.
Sometimes adding the acronym in parentheses is just enough to kick a paragraph over
to a new line. You might find, however, that spelling the term out in full the second
time would not add a new line to a later paragraph. Thus, you could save a line by
not using the acronym in the first place.
5. Scrutinize the relevance of every sentence. See if there are one or two sentences that
aren’t really needed.
6. Look for places where you might have used froth instead of substance. Bear in mind
Samuel Johnson’s dictum: “Read over your compositions and, when you meet a
passage which you think is particularly fine, strike it out.”
Next Section: Letters
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