Internal assessment resource reference number Eng/2/2_D6
PAGE FOR TEACHER USE
2009
Internal Assessment Resources
Subject Reference: English 2.2
Internal assessment resource reference number:
Eng/2/2_D6
Everyone is a critic
Supports internal assessment for:
Achievement Standard 90376 v2
Produce crafted and developed formal transactional writing
Credits: 3
Date version published:
February 2009
Ministry of Education
quality assurance status:
For use in internal assessment
from 2009
© Crown 2009
Internal assessment resource reference number Eng/2/2_D6
PAGE FOR TEACHER USE
Teacher Guidelines:
The following guidelines are supplied to enable teachers to carry out valid and
consistent assessment using this internal assessment resource.
Context/setting:
This resource may be used as part of a writing unit or as part of a film study.
Students will write and develop a film review suitable for publication in a school
newspaper read by Year 12 students. The review must be based on a film
studied in class.
Conditions:
Teachers should be aware that there are many reviews on popular films available
via the internet. This activity should be worked on in class under teacher
supervision to ensure authenticity. Teachers may guide students through the
initial tasks, helping them to make suitable language choices. Teachers may
demonstrate how the techniques/language choices used in the samples in the
activity can be applied to the students’ own writing.
As students develop their final drafts, teachers can offer appropriate guidance
that writing may need further work on ideas, language, structure or accuracy in
spelling, punctuation or paragraphing. Teachers may not correct errors, rewrite
sentences or suggest specific ideas. Students should have access to dictionaries
to check their writing. Word processing is acceptable providing it is done under
teacher supervision.
Teachers are directed to Explanatory Notes 10 -12 in the achievement standard.
Resource requirements:
Access to film reviews of films other than the one being studied.
Access to dictionaries and computers as appropriate.
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Internal assessment resource reference number Eng/2/2_D6
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2009
Internal Assessment Resource
Subject Reference: English 2.2
Internal assessment resource reference number: Eng/2/2_D6
Everyone is a critic
Supports internal assessment for:
Achievement Standard 90376 v2
Produce crafted and developed formal transactional writing
Credits: 3
Student Instructions Sheet
In this activity you will write a film review of at least 500 words on a film studied in
class. The review will be suitable for publication in a school newspaper, with a
readership of Year 12 students and your teacher.
Before you begin writing you will work through some introductory activities to
prepare you to write your review.
You will be assessed on how well you:
 express, develop and support your opinions about the film
 your ability to use a writing style suitable to the task and audience
 how well you organise your material
 your accuracy in spelling, punctuation, grammar, syntax, paragraphing.
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Introduction
Going to the movies, buying a book, renting a DVD, buying a CD or computer game
all cost time and money. The number of choices you are presented with as a
consumer is staggering. A good review can help people make an informed decision
that will reduce the amount of time and money they waste on products that turn out
to be less than satisfying.
Task 1: Reviewing what you already know
a) As a class discuss these questions about receiving opinions and making
decisions:





How do you usually decide which films or videos you want to see?
Whose opinion would you trust if they recommended a film or video? Why?
Whose opinion would you not trust at all? Why not?
What would convince you to trust the judgement of someone you didn’t know
who recommended a film?
Do you ever read, listen to, or look at reviews? Are there any reviewers
whose opinion you particularly trust? Which TV shows, radio stations,
internet sites, newspapers or magazines have reviews that you would trust?
Why?
Task 2: Giving an informal spoken film review
a) Give an informal spoken review of a film to a partner. Think of a film you know
well. Without revealing the name of the film, or giving really obvious hints such
as the name of characters or actors:



Briefly explain the genre of the film, the overall intentions of the director, and
a brief plot summary.
Choose three particular aspects of the film such as special effects, acting,
camera work, scariness, and evaluate how effective each aspect was, by
referring to specific examples.
Give your partner a clear recommendation as to whether he or she should
view it or not.
b) Your partner will now ‘review’ your oral review by discussing each of the
following aspects with you:




How clear was the speaker’s opinion?
Did he/she give you an overview of the film so that the comments and
examples made sense?
Did the speaker give away too much information about the film? (for example
by revealing surprises in the plot, or how the film ended?)
How well did the speaker support his or her opinion with specific examples
from the film?
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

Did the speaker evaluate the film in relation to the intentions of the director?
For example it might be unfair to criticise a romance film for not having
exciting special effects, or a science fiction film for not being realistic.
Did the speaker give you a clear enough idea about the film for you to make
a reasonable decision whether or not you would enjoy it?
Task 3: Judging a film on its own merits
a) Write down three different genres of films that you are particularly familiar with,
such as action, romance, period drama, art house, horror.
b) For each genre draw a large circle. Arrange the circles so that they all intersect.
c) Brainstorm at least five qualities that you think a successful film in that genre
should have. In the intersecting parts of the circles record the aspects that are
common to all films.
It is important when you review a film that you evaluate it in relation to its
genre and the intentions of its director. It would be unfair to criticise a
romantic comedy such as Sleepless in Seattle because it did not have enough
action or special effects, but it would be reasonable to criticise it if the two lead
actors did not make you care whether they got together or not.
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Task 4: Building a vocabulary ‘toolbox’
a) Read at least three film reviews. Your teacher will provide some examples, or
give you some suggestions where you might find some. As you read you will
develop a vocabulary toolbox of typical words and phrases that describe
different aspects of films by adding them to the table below.
b) Share the vocabulary you find as a class. Add new terms to your own toolbox.
Film Review Vocabulary Toolbox
Camera work
Lighting
Special Effects
Acting and Casting
visually stunning
technically superb
dull
sumptuous
evocative
atmospheric
over-the-top
stunning
budget
state-of-the-art
wooden
convincing
believable
accomplished
inspired
Costume
Plot
Dialogue
Pace
award-winning
period
stylish
predictable
original
muddled
climax
leaden
stilted
realistic
contrived
drawn-out
bum-numbing
tightly-scripted
fast moving
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Task 5: Planning your review
a) Record important details about the film your class has viewed such as: the title,
director, genre, date of production, country of origin, and names of main actors.
Record notes on these questions:
 what is the director’s main aim?
 what type of film is it supposed to be?
 who is the target audience?
 how is the film intended to make them feel or think?
b) Decide whether your review will be positive, negative, or mixed.
c) Read the table below showing how one student evaluated different aspects of
the film Dracula to prepare for his film review.
Aspect
Director’s
intention
Intention
achieved?
Supporting explanation and examples
Acting
For Dracula to be
scary and repulsive,
but somehow
sympathetic at the
same time.
Yes
Oldman is such a good actor that you really
believe in his love for his dead wife. When he
first sees the photo of Mina his eyes look sad
and gentle even though the rest of him is so
grotesque.
For Keanu Reeves
to seem like an
innocent hero.
No
His performance is stilted. When he gets
married to Mina it looks like he is reading his
lines off an autocue. Next to Oldman and
Anthony Hopkins he just looks useless.
Wynona Ryder is
supposed to be the
woman that Dracula
gave up his immortal
soul for.
No
Atmosphere
To use colour and
lighting to create the
horror mood.
Sort of
Pace
To keep us
interested and to get
us on the edge of
our seats – will
Dracula steal Mina’s
soul forever?
No
She’s just like Keanu. You don’t ever believe
that she’s English. Even when she is
supposed to be feeling passionate (like when
she got married to Jonathon and when she
started getting attracted to Dracula) she’s no
different.
Beginning is excellent – the blood-washed
screen when he stabs the crucifix, the way
the sky changed from blue to red when
Jonathon left London and arrived in
Transylvania, the screen is tinted red every
time Dracula is around to create a mood of
horror. It gets boring because he doesn’t use
any different techniques after the first half
hour.
It’s too slow and repetitive. It lasts for 130
minutes but it seems even longer.
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d) Choose the three or four aspects of the film for review that you feel contribute
most to its overall success or failure of the film. Make up and complete a chart
using the same four headings from task 5(c):
Aspect
Director’s
intention
Intention
achieved?
Supporting explanation and
examples
Task 6: Reading a student’s review
Read the following review that one student wrote about the film Bram Stoker’s
Dracula directed by Francis Ford Coppola. Also read the annotations about
structure and language and answer the questions.
Structure
Introduction




background
information
genre
director
writer’s
opinion of
film.
Plot Overview
Summarises the
film to give
reader a general
idea of what the
film is about
without ‘ruining’ it
by giving away
any surprises.
Acting
Gives two brief
contrasting
evaluations with
supporting details
from the film.
© Crown 2009
Language
Deadly Dull Dracula
Review of Bram Stoker’s Dracula directed by
Francis Ford Coppola
I am the Count and I luvvvve to count. Anyone who has
taken on the huge job of counting all the Dracula and
vampire stories which have been made now has one
more to add to their list – Bram Stoker’s Dracula
directed by Francis Ford Coppola. We all know how it
goes: nocturnal, neck-biting, blood-sucking, castles,
coffins, garlic, stakes through the heart. We already
know every Dracula cliché there is. We’ve seen Buffy.
And Sesame Street. Do we really need another vampire
film? Does it add anything? Does it really, count? I don’t
think so.
In the
introduction, find
an example of:



a pun
a rhetorical
question
listing.
Why has the
writer used these
techniques?
The story begins in 1462. On finding his wife has been
tricked into killing herself, Vlad takes his revenge on the
world by turning himself into the blood-sucking vampire
Dracula (Gary Oldman). 400 years later Jonathon
(Keanu Reeves, a real estate agent, visits his castle.
Dracula sees a photo of Keanu’s fiancée, Mina, (Winona
Ryder) who looks just like his dead wife, and decides to
travel to London to see if they can patch things up.
There are some strong performances, and some which
really need to be laid to rest - preferably six feet under.
Gary Oldman is excellent as Dracula. He is totally
believable as a handsome young hero at the beginning
and as a love-sick vampire later. When his wife dies and
he goes into a rage and stabs the cross I felt sorry for
him and shocked that he could do such a terrible,
blasphemous thing.
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Atmosphere
Discusses
atmosphere by
focusing
particularly on
one aspect.
Opinion is
supported with
specific
examples.
Concludes this
section by
making a strong
statement of the
writer’s opinion.
When he sees the photo of Mina I felt scared for her and
Jonathon. His love for her, even though perverted and
murderous, was believable. On the other hand Keanu
Reeves is as wooden as one of Dracula’s coffins, and it
is hardly believable that anyone would give up their
immortal soul for someone as inexpressive and irritating
as Wynona Ryder.
Coppola creates a strong vampirish atmosphere, but to
the point of overkill. Take his use of colour. As you
might expect there is quite a bit of red and black in the
film. When he stabs the cross, blood pours not just from
the cross itself but from the sides and top of the screen
to show the extent to which he had turned on God.
When Jonathon leaves London the sky is bright blue but
as he approaches Transylvania the sky is awash with
red. Whenever Dracula is in the frame everything is
tinted with red to create a real sense of blood and
danger. This had me fascinated at first but unfortunately
Coppola uses this one technique so much that you are
soon longing to see a few other colours as well, and you
begin to see it as an unoriginal and annoying gimmick.
The biggest fault in this film is the pace. The first half
hour is great. I found the elaborate period costumes, the
set design, and the excellent camera work all riveting. It
was different from any film I had ever seen before.
Unfortunately the film keeps on going, very, very slowly
for another 100 tedious minutes. The pace was so slow
that it gave me too much time to think, and what I began
to think was boring, boring, boring!
Conclusion
Restates writer’s
opinion and
finishes review
with a strong
statement.
© Crown 2009
In the body of the
review, find an
example of:
 simile
 metaphor
 a pun
Why has the writer
used each
technique?
Pace
Note how the
writer has
organised the
aspects in
reverse order of
effectiveness.
Statements
about acting are
reasonably
positive,
atmosphere less
positive, and
pace negative.
Why is the
review organised
in this way?
Bram Stoker’s Dracula is based on a famous novel,
made by a famous director, and stars famous actors.
There are aspects of the film that are very good when
you think about them by themselves. Unfortunately,
when you put them all together, you’ve got a film that
deserves a stake through its heart.
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Task 7: Writing your first draft
a) Write a catchy title for your review.
b) Write an introduction that grabs the reader’s attention and clearly states:
 the title of the film, director, principal actors
 the genre and the director’s intention
 your opinion of the film.
c) Write a short paragraph giving an entertaining overview of the film.
d) Write one paragraph for each aspect that you have chosen to evaluate,
developing details from the table you completed in Task 5.
e) Write a concluding paragraph that restates your opinion of the film and ends
your review strongly.
Task 8: Craft your writing
a) Read over your writing and then edit it by using the techniques mentioned in the
student review of Bram Stoker’s Dracula in Task 6 as a checklist.
b) Check all your spelling, punctuation, grammar, syntax and paragraphing.
c) Before you develop your draft to its finished state, read the exemplars on pages
11 to 16. Talk about the strengths and the areas they could be improved. You
may not use any of this material in your own review.
d) Your finished review will be at least 500 words long. It will:
 develop and support your opinions about the film
 use language appropriate for an review and for a readership of Year 12
students and your teacher
 follow a suitable review structure
 use writing conventions accurately (spelling, punctuation, grammar, syntax,
paragraphing).
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Deeper
features:
achievement
criteria assessing:

ideas

crafting

structure.
Writing is not
crafted:
 awkward
expression in
several places.
 incorrect/
inappropriate
word choices
Exemplar A:
BILLY ELLIOT
Not Achieved
Film Review
Billy Elliot has a fresh, new angle to it and is a story well told
which is proven by all of the awards this movie has won.
The director Stephen Daldrey, a new comer to films has done a
realistic movie which people can relate to and emphisise with
the characters – Imagine a small working clas family who are
getting no income due to a minors strike for a whole year and
that same family dealing with the loss of a reasontely passed
mother and one word springs to mind, tension.
The pace was tightly scripted as viewers sat glued to there
seats hoping for Billys Ballet future and sympathizing for the
Nana who was told to be quiet time and time again by Jackie
Elliot (Gary Lewis).
Some limited
supporting
detail.
achievement criteria
assessing:
conventions.
Set in a small British town called Durham the story of a young
boy Billy Elliot is told in the year of 1984 where a small
community has been taken over by a Minors Strike.
The acting in this film Billy Elliot is inspiring and believeable
from the very start.
Ideas are not
developed:
muddled
commentary on
the film.
Surface
features:
Billy is an eleven year old boy who while boxing comes across
a group of young girls doing Ballet who are sharing the same
hall due to the minors strike and becomes rather intreiged by
what he witnesses and before you know it Billy is a regular
Ballet dancer. In the film there is a good use of contrast with
the Ballet lessons and the Minors yelling at the “scabs” in one
scene, also there is as good use of camera shots where Billy
finds his freedom for example and runs along the road with a
view of the ocean behind him.
Writing
conventions are
not used
accurately
throughout:
 intrusive errors
in
 syntax
 spelling
 and
paragraphing
throughout.
Titles not
underlined.
NB: a few
random errors, or
minor editing
lapses, are
acceptable.)
Billy Elliot is an inspiration for the way he can break out of the
expectations and traditions that surround him, as he was
expected to become a Minor like his father and older brother
and stay in his home town for his life where as Billy has greater
and higher accomplishments on his mind and works hard at his
goal with help from Mrs Wilkinson (Julie Walters) the Ballet
instructor who takes Billy under her wing and becomes like
mother figure to Billy and treats him as an adult. Julie Walters
performance in this film is incredible which is backed up by the
awards she has won from this feature.
Billy played by Jamie Bell also puts up an overall excellent
performance with his package of good acting and dancing the
provides a fresh exciting new feel to this movie and also has
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won individual awards. The character Billy shows responsibility
from the very beginning as he prepares breakfast for his Nana
and then chases after her through a nearby field as poor old
Nan likes to wander. He is also a very caring boy who is kind
and happy. Billy shows his happiness in the opening scene
where he bounces on his bed to one of his brothers records
which shows his energy and keenness to life.
The beauty of this film is the characters who touch Billys life
like Mrs Wilkinson the Ballet instructor and when Jackie Elliot
finally realizes Billys talent. This movie is really good for all
ages and although a drama has also a lot of comedy
throughout it.
© Crown 2009
Writing has
some overall
structure, but
with
weaknesses:
 jumbled
introduction
 attempt made
to express
points in
paragraphs,
Paragraphs not
well linked.
 weak
conclusion:
details of
characterisation
inappropriate at
this point.
Minimal
overview /
summation.
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Deeper features:
achievement
criteria assessing:
 ideas
 crafting
 structure.
Writing is
crafted:
reasonably clear
expression and
appropriate
language use.
Lacks degree of
control needed
for merit. Some
variety of syntax
and diction,
although
repetitive in
places (eg
“great”).
Exemplar B: Achievement
GREAT EFFECTS, BUT….
Bram Stoker’s Dracula
Surface features:
achievement criteria
assessing:
 conventions.
“One blood is the life and it shall be mine”. Yes there was
plenty of blood and plenty of great effects in Francis Ford
Coppola’s new film ‘Bram Stoker’s Dracula.’ A movie needs
more than effects though. Dracula was a bit boring with the
drawn out story. The cast didn’t act to their full potential and
were dull, but Coppola made up for this by using great special
effects, costume, lighting and make-up.
The film did an excellent job in the special effects department.
When Vlad the Impaler stabbed the cross after finding out that
his wife had committed suicide, blood poured out everywhere
until the whole screen was flowing with blood. This was great
because it was so unexpected and it showed what a terrible
thing he had done. All that blood was a great introduction to his
new life as a vampire and got us in the mood for a good
vampire movie.
Writing
conventions
are used
accurately
throughout:
titles
underlined,
correct syntax,
paragraphing,
punctuation
and spelling.
(NB: a few
random errors,
or minor editing
lapses, are
acceptable.)
Coppola also used lighting cleverly. When Dracula or any of
the other vampires were around, the lighting would turn red to
show that there was danger. When there were no vampires it
would turn blue to give a sense of safety. For example when
Jonathon (Keanu Reeves) was leaving London the sky was
blue because he was safe, but as he entered Transylvannia
the background turned red because he was entering
dangerous vampire country.
Costuming showed me the time the film was set in and this
also was a technique that Coppola used well. One way it was
good was because the costumes’ colour showed what was
going on. Mina always wore blue because she was a nice,
safe, quiet girl, but her friend Lucy always wore red because
she was wild and outgoing.
Ideas are
developed and
supported:
A number of
straighforward
points made about
the film, supported
with relevant
examples.
A technique that won Coppola an Academy Award was makeup. Dracula’s physical shape changed almost all the time, from
a handsome young man to a wrinkly, 400 year old vampire and
then back again, into a bat and a posse of rats. The make-up
was so well done that you really believed that he could change
like this and helped show how powerful he was.
The problem was that the film is long and confusing. After 135
minutes it really did lose the plot. Part of the problem was that
there were too many stories happening at the same time:
Dracula in London trying to seduce Mina, Van Helsing trying to
track down Dracula, Lucy getting used to being a vampire…
Scenes seemed to jump from one to another and by the time
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Writing is
structured:
 an introduction
 several points
expressed in
paragraphs
 a conclusion
which sums
up the writer’s
overall opinion
of the film.
the stories connected and began to make sense, it was too
late.
The best things about the film were all the techniques that
Coppola used and it was also good to find out about the
original Dracula story. The worst parts are that the film was too
long and slow moving and the acting was dull, but this was
made up for by the makeup, costume, lighting and special
effects. It was a movie that was enjoyable to watch if you are in
the right mood -and if you have plenty of time.
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Exemplar C: Merit
Deeper features:
achievement
criteria assessing:
 ideas
 crafting
 structure.
Ideas are
developed and
supported
convincingly:
but not
convincingly
(required for
excellence).
Discussion is too
plottish in parts.
Ideas are
developed and
supported
convincingly:
Some thoughtful
comments
made.
Writing is
crafted and
controlled,
despite some
fluency lapses.
Does not
‘command
attention’
(needed for
excellence).
DANCING TOWARDS YOUR HEART
Billy Elliot
Surface features:
achievement criteria
assessing:

conventions.
“Just because I like ballet doesn’t mean I’m a poof”. An eleven
year old boy wanting to do ballet, surrounded by a macho
mining community. Sound a bit unbalanced? This must see
movie directed by Stephen Daldry really pin-points the fact that
not all male ballet dancers are ‘poofs’. With the superb
storyline, outstanding acting and creative cinematography it
isn’t any wonder why this film has been nominated for so many
awards.
Set in Durham, North East England, Billy Elliot is the story of
an eleven year old boy who is lost in the muddle of a family
grieving and the historical 1984 miners’ strike. Jackie Elliot
(Gary Lewis) and Tony Elliot (Jamie Draven), are both miners
that are struggling to cope with the pressures of a mainly
mining community in strife. To carry on the family tradition
Jackie makes his son Billy, (Jamie Bell) take boxing lessons.
This is so he can be just as tough as his older brother Tony, all
ready for a tough life in the mining industy. It just so happens
that Billy stumbles across a ballet class after one of his boxing
lessons, and decides to give it a go. Soon realizing that this is
his way of expressing himself, he starts attending ballet
classes during his boxing lessons. Billy’s dance teacher, Mrs
Wilkinson (Julie Walters) soon notices his incredible rhythm
and expression. It is not until Billy gets caught going to ballet
lessons by Jackie that the true beauty of the film begins to
develop. As with all male ballet dancers Billy is immediately
given the stereotypical label of being gay and his determination
to prove to his father and brother that he is not is truly inspiring.
He doesn’t get off to a good start however. Telling his father
that lots of men do ballet was fine, but then Billy mentions
Wayne Sleep. Not a good example, (but a very humourous
one) for a boy accused of being gay to use.
With spell bounding performances from Jamie Bell, (Billy Elliot)
and Gary Lewis, (Jackie Elliot), the reality of the fresh original
storyline is easy to see. By casting Jamie Bell as the sincere
Billy Elliot his previous ‘inexistence’ as an actor means there
are no images of him from previous movies. His long history in
dance is evident in the film as he shows so much enthusiasm
and energy just like Billy. The tough look of Gary Lewis (Jackie
Elliot) really makes you sympathize Billy and his troubles with
his father. One particular scene when Billy is caught doing
ballet by Jackie, the harsh look on Gary Lewis’s face really
emphasizes the angry person within.
© Crown 2009
Writing
conventions are
used accurately
throughout:
titles underlined,
correct syntax,
paragraphing,
punctuation and
spelling.
(NB: a few
random errors, or
minor editing
lapses, are
acceptable.)
Writing is clearly
structured:
 a challenging
introduction
 paragraphed
discussion of
storyline,
acting,
cinematograp
hy
 a conclusion
that echoes
the
introduction.
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Ideas are
developed
but not
integrated
(required for
excellence).
Some
generalisations
and superficiality
detract.
Special mention must be made to Brian Tufano for his
outstanding achievements in the area of cinematography. The
contrasting camera shots, lighting and scenery all change
tremendously throughout the film which will leave you
understanding poor Billy’s struggle between what he loves and
what he fears. Whenever Billy is dancing to tranquil music, he
is surrounded by giggling girls in white tutu’s. This image is
consistently contrasted to the violent, dark riot scenes. The
effect of this is really a must-see. It is both stunning to the
heart and eye.
Writing is crafted
With a running time of 110 minutes this captivating movie
contains scenes for all viewers. There’s comedy, drama,
dance, history, the list is endless.
So if you are waiting for the next best thing since sliced bread
be sure to dance your way into the inspiring tale of a young
boy’s love for dance.
© Crown 2009
and controlled:
Reasonable range of
vocabulary and
sentence structures,
but clichés detract.
Does not command
attention (needed for
excellence).
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Internal assessment resource reference number Eng/2/2_D6
PAGE FOR STUDENT USE
Exemplar D: Excellence
Deeper features:
achievement
criteria assessing:
 ideas
 crafting
 structure.
Writing is
crafted,
controlled and
commands
attention:
effective varying
of sentence
lengths for
emphasis.
Sustained use of
humour / puns
throughout.
Deadly Dull Dracula
Review of Bram Stoker’s Dracula directed by Francis Ford
Coppola
I am the Count and I luvvvve to count. Anyone who has taken on
the huge job of counting all the Dracula and vampire stories
which have been made now has one more to add to their list –
Bram Stoker’s Dracula directed by Francis Ford Coppola. We all
know how it goes: nocturnal, neck-biting, blood-sucking, castles,
coffins, garlic, stakes through the heart. We already know every
Dracula cliché there is. We’ve seen Buffy. And Sesame Street.
Do we really need another vampire film? Does it add anything?
Does it really, count? I don’t think so.
The story begins in 1462. On finding his wife has been tricked
into killing herself, Vlad takes his revenge on the world by
turning himself into the blood-sucking vampire Dracula (Gary
Oldman). 400 years later Jonathon (Keanu Reeves, a real estate
agent, visits his castle. Dracula sees a photo of Keanu’s fiancée,
Mina, (Winona Ryder) who looks just like his dead wife, and
decides to travel to London to see if they can patch things up.
There are some strong performances, and some which really
need to be laid to rest - preferably six feet under. Gary Oldman
is excellent as Dracula. He is totally believable as a handsome
young hero at the beginning and as a love-sick vampire later.
When his wife dies and he goes into a rage and stabs the cross I
felt sorry for him and shocked that he could do such a terrible,
blasphemous thing. When he sees the photo of Mina I felt
scared for her and Jonathon. His love for her, even though
perverted and murderous, was believable. On the other hand
Keanu Reeves is as wooden as one of Dracula’s coffins, and it
is hardly believable that anyone would give up their immortal
soul for someone as inexpressive and irritating as Wynona
Ryder.
Ideas are
developed and
integrated
convincingly:
balances
positive aspects
with criticisms.
Surface features:
achievement criteria
assessing:

conventions.
Writing is
clearly and
effectively
structured:
introduction
indicates the
tone of the
review.
Writing
conventions
are used
accurately
throughout:
titles underlined,
correct syntax,
paragraphing,
punctuation and
spelling.
(NB: a few
random errors,
or minor editing
lapses, are
acceptable)
Coppola creates a strong vampirish atmosphere, but to the point
of overkill. Take his use of colour. As you might expect there is
quite a bit of red and black in the film. When he stabs the cross,
blood pours not just from the cross itself but from the sides and
top of the screen to show the extent to which he had turned on
God. When Jonathon leaves London the sky is bright blue but as
he approaches Transylvania the sky is awash with red.
Whenever Dracula is in the frame everything is tinted with red to
create a real sense of blood and danger. This had me fascinated
at first but unfortunately Coppola uses this one technique so
much that you are soon longing to see a few other colours as
well, and you begin to see it as an unoriginal and annoying
gimmick.
© Crown 2009
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Internal assessment resource reference number Eng/2/2_D6
PAGE FOR STUDENT USE
Writing is
crafted,
controlled and
commands
The biggest fault in this film is the pace. The first half hour is
attention:
great. I found the elaborate period costumes, the set design, and
effectively
the excellent camera work all riveting. It was different from any
combines
film I had ever seen before. Unfortunately the film keeps on
sophisticated
going, very, very slowly for another 100 tedious minutes. The
diction with
informal register.
pace was so slow that it gave me too much time to think, and
Skilfully
what I began to think was boring, boring, boring!
integrates
humour.
Bram Stoker’s Dracula is based on a famous novel, made by a
Sustains a real
famous director, and stars famous actors. There are aspects of
sense of
audience.
the film that are very good when you think about them by
themselves. Unfortunately, when you put them all together,
you’ve got a film that deserves a stake through its heart.
© Crown 2009
Writing is
clearly and
effectively
structured:
purposefully
builds argument
throughout,
reinforced by
conclusion.
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Internal assessment resource reference number Eng/2/2_D6
PAGE FOR TEACHER USE
Assessment Schedule: Eng/2/2_D6 - Produce crafted and developed formal
transactional writing
Achievement
Descriptor
Example
Develop and support ideas in a piece of Refer to annotated
formal transactional writing.
achievement exemplar B
on page 12.
Craft writing to create effects which are
appropriate to audience, purpose and
text type.
Structure material in a way that is
appropriate to audience, purpose and
text type.
Use writing conventions accurately.
Achievement
with Merit
Develop and support ideas
convincingly in a piece of formal
transactional writing.
Refer to annotated merit
exemplar C on page 14.
Craft controlled writing to create effects
which are appropriate to audience,
purpose and text type.
Structure material clearly in a way that
is appropriate to audience, purpose
and text type.
Use writing conventions accurately.
Achievement
with Excellence
Develop, support, and integrate ideas
convincingly, in a piece of formal
transactional writing.
Refer to annotated
excellence exemplar D
on page 15.
Craft controlled writing to create effects
which are appropriate to audience,
purpose and text type, and which
commands attention.
Structure material clearly and
effectively in a way that is appropriate
to audience, purpose and text type.
Use writing conventions accurately.
© Crown 2009
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