Jessica Patton
March 11, 2012
English 11 P.4A
Research Essay
Relationships and the Great Gatsby
Have you ever wondered why people stay in bad marriages? In The Great Gatsby Tom
and Daisy’s marriage is a prime example of “bad.” Tom has a lot of money and they live in East
Egg (old money). He cheats on Daisy with a lower class woman named Myrtle. Neither
Tom nor Daisy is happy, but they have a child together and for some reason both of them
continue to stay in the marriage. I think people stay in bad marriages out of fear, reputation, and
money.
Some believe people stay in bad marriages because of fear of the unknown. Patricia Wall,
a journalist, said: “The reasons that people give for staying in a marriage are almost always a lie.
They stay because they’re afraid of the unknown—of change.”(Shannon) I completely agree
with this, because everyone always makes up excuses for staying in their marriage when it is
really fear. I think this is partially the case for Tom and Daisy because they have been married
for a couple of years, and they are comfortable. Not only would divorce be uncommon, but it
would also completely disrupt their lifestyle. It is clear Daisy is not happy and knows Tom is
cheating. ‘Go ahead,’ answered Daisy genially. ‘And if you want to take down any addresses
here’s my little gold pencil. . . ‘ (Fitzgerald 112). But despite the cheating and the spite she feels
towards him, she still stays with him. I think she is afraid of what will happen if she leaves him.
It is hard to break old habits, and for Daisy, Tom is like a habit. People like normalcy and
routine.
Another reason people stay in bad marriages is to withhold social reputations. “People
getting divorced are looked down by the society and some religions. So many pretend that they
have a happy marriage even if they are suffering”(Animika). I also agree with this, because
people look at divorce as an embarrassment, or at least the people in bad marriages believe
others will think of them as an embarrassment if they get a divorce. This was especially true in
the 1920’s (when the novel takes place). In the 1920’s it was not against the law to get a divorce,
but it was extremely uncommon. Daisy and Tom are considered upper class. They come from
old money and both of them tend to be rather vain. “Oh, I’ll stay in the East, don’t you worry,’
he said, glancing at Daisy and then back at me as if he were alert for something more. ‘I’d be a
God Damn fool to live anywhere else” (Fitzgerald 15). They care about how society perceives
them. I think a divorce would be a major embarrassment to them. Daisy and Tom want to be
viewed as perfect.
Finally, my last reason people stay in bad marriages, and perhaps the most pertinent to
the novel is money. Finances can be a stress in any marriage but more so when it comes to
divorce. I think money can be a big factor if you have a child because you don’t want your child
to go without. This isn’t so much a problem for Tom as it is for Daisy. She wants to stay with
Tom because he is rich and his family always has been which is respectable in this time period.
If she left Tom she would have no money. There is the possibility of her turning to Gatsby, but
he is new money and I think for her social standards that would be a step down on the latter. For
Tom’s point of view if he left Daisy he could turn to Myrtle, but she is considered lower class
and lives in the Valley of the Ashes. She is broke and even though Tom has money, I don’t think
it is reason enough to leave Daisy.
Throughout The Great Gatsby, nothing about the marriage of Tom and Daisy can be
considered good. There is cheating going on, and neither of them are happy. Also they have
feelings for other people.
They have been together for five years and have a child together, but is that enough to stay
together and to stay miserable? I think people stay in bad marriages out of: fear, reputation, and
money.