GRADE 10 HEALTH 2 - Conflict Resolution
Introduction:
Read over the set of notes below, highlight key points, complete the activities and/or write down any
questions you may have about the material covered so that you can ask your teacher to explain the
material in more detail as needed.
 You must also complete the “Advice Columnist” assignment outlined at end of this lesson
and submit it for evaluation.
 When you are ready, you can ask to write the test for this unit.
NOTES
What Is Conflict?
Conflict is a disagreement, struggle or fight that occurs whenever two or more people’s wants,
needs, demands, values or beliefs clash.
 Conflict occurs when what is important to us is: Overlooked, Denied, Endangered, Taken
Away, Attacked.
 Not all conflict is bad! Conflict is a normal part of life and can provide a healthy way to bring
about change (e.g. contract negotiations between the NHL and NHLPA)
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Major Causes of Conflict
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Conflict over
Resources
Possessions
Material goods
Water/Food
Money
Time
Land/Space
Stanley Cup
Psychological Need
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Need for power
Need to control
Need to be recognized
Need to feel secure
Sense of belonging
Economic stability
Conflicting Values
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Religion
Beliefs
Government/Politics
Family upbringing
Culture
Ethnic background,
Environment
Gender stereotypes
Racial prejudice
Relationships (loyalty, gossip, teasing,
slander, Jealousy)
Sometimes conflict can be multidimensional in that it involves more than one issue. This
makes conflict more complex and therefore more difficult to resolve.
Communication: The Rise and Fall of Conflict
What is Communication?
 The process through which you send and receive messages from others.
Communication & Conflict:
 Very often the root cause of conflict is due to a failure to communicate properly.
 The messages that we send are not always received or interpreted the way that we intended
them to be received.
 We need to be precise and accurate with what we say and do.
 Listeners have a responsibility to be attentive and give feedback that they heard the message.
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Verbal and Non-verbal ways to Communicate
Verbal Communication
Non-Verbal Communication
Tone of voice (yell, calm, etc.)
 eye contact
Labelling, name calling
 personal space
“I” messages
 nods
Paraphrasing
 hand and arm gestures
Acknowledgement
 body position/posture
Choice of words
 facial expressions
Feedback
 human touch
Styles of behaviour (passive,
aggressive, assertive)
Communication Do’s & Don’ts
Communication Do’s
Communication Don’ts
Listen actively
 Interrupt
Face the person with an open body
 Raise your voice or yell
Look the person in the eye
 Call names or label
Hear a persons out (let them finish)
 Blame
Paraphrase (“so what I heard you say
 Force or threaten
was …”)
 Laugh at people
Ask questions (how does this make you
 Assume you understand
feel? I’m not sure I fully understand! Etc.)
 Make judgments
Resist distractions
 Say “always” or “Never”
Be open-minded
 Offer advice when its not asked for
ACTIVITY 1: Communication
Part A: List three examples of positive and negative forms of verbal and non-verbal communication.
NON VERBAL COMUNICATION
Positive
Negative
e.g. Thumbs Up
e.g. Middle Finger
1:
1:
2:
2:
3:
3:
VERBAL COMMUNICATION
Positive
Negative
e.g. Hello
e.g. Name calling
1:
1:
2:
2:
3:
3:
Part B: Identify various aspects of communication in a commercial.
Watch: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zx4SnN9HuRw
1. Is the man an active listener? What does it mean to be an active listener? How then does
the man convince the woman that he is such a good listener? (i.e. identify some of the verbal
and non verbal forms of communication present in the commercial as well as some of the
communication Do’s and Don’ts that the man is using to fool the woman into thinking he is
listening).
4 Major Types of Conflict
1) Interpersonal Conflicts (Between people)
 Disagreements between two people.
 E.G.: You get into an argument with a friend about where to go on Saturday night.
2) Intrapersonal Conflicts (Within a person)
 Struggles within yourself that often involve mixed emotions (i.e. to do … or not to do …) Moral
or Ethical dilemmas!
 E.G. :
Your friends are going out on Friday night and you know that alcohol and drugs are
going to be involved. You really want to go out but don’t want to drink or do drugs.
3) Intragroup Conflict (Within a group):
 Conflict that occurs between members of a group
 E.G.:
Some members of the student council want to have an end-of-year dance whereas
others want a carnival day. They just can’t seem to agree!
4) Intergroup Conflict (Between groups):
 A dispute between two different groups (nations, religions, ethnic or colour).
 E.G.:
Rival gangs, warfare,
ACTIVITY 2: Identify the Cause and Type of Conflict
Instructions:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
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9.
Try to identify the type of conflict in the situations below. Also try to identify the
cause of conflict. See the end of this note to check your answers.
Paolo thinks his sister, Katia is always in charge of the remote control. Tonight there is a
special show that Paolo really wants to watch, but Katia changes the channel and the two start
arguing.
Elena really wants to play football, but her high school only allows males on the team. Elena
gets together a group of students and parents that believe this is sexist and they approach the
administrative staff of her high school. The school tells this group that there is no female
football team because the females could get injured if they played with the male football team.
Uncle Jim and Aunt Edna came to visit. They insisted on sitting at the kitchen table to smoke.
The smoke caused the baby to start coughing. The baby's parents asked them to stop
smoking. Uncle Jim and Aunt Edna suggested that they would leave if they were not welcome
The McDonald's staff is having a meeting about breaks. Some of the staff is concerned that
other members take very long breaks, leaving others to do all the work. The management and
staff must come to an agreement as how to regulate break times.
Terry bought a slice of pizza from the cafeteria at lunch. As he was walking to his table, he
accidentally bumped into Abdul and the pizza ended up on Abdul's clothes. Terry apologizes,
but Abdul is very upset and it looks like this might escalate into a physical fight.
During World War II, there were many countries involved including Canada, Great Britain, the
United States, Germany and Italy
Betul is in the music store and she spots the latest CD of her favorite band, but she does not
have enough money to purchase the CD. Betul starts thinking about the poor security system
the store has. If she stole the CD, nobody would ever know.
The youth club raised $100 at the fundraiser last week and they are having a difficult time
deciding where the money should go. Some of the members think it would be best spent
renovating the club's building. Other members believe it should be spent on the group's next
outdoor camping trip
Rapinder is about to leave her house and meet her friends. Her parents are at work and she
knows she really should not take: the car without permission.
ACTIVITY 3: How Do You Respond To Conflict?
The following exercise is designed to help you take a closer look at how you respond to conflict. There are no
trick questions and no right or wrong answers. The purpose of the exercise is not to judge your behaviour, but
to help you become more aware of how you generally deal with conflict situations.
Instructions:
1. Think of a recent conflict (at, work, school or home, with a friend, parent, etc.)
2. Choose one situation and respond to the following statements
a. Put a “3” beside the statement if it is how you usually respond to conflict
b. Put a “2” beside the statement if it is how you occasionally respond to conflict
c. Put a “1” beside the statement if it is how you rarely or never respond to conflict
Statements: When there is conflict I …
1. ______ Try to show the other person the logic and benefits of my position.
2. ______ Try to make everyone feel at ease.
3. ______ Try to work out compromise.
4. ______ Try to find someone else to handle the problem.
5. ______ Try not to hurt the other person’s feelings.
6. ______ Try to get my way.
7. ______ Try to find out what the real problem is.
8. ______ Try to find a fair combination of wins and losses for both of us.
9. ______ Try to postpone the issue until I have had time to think it over.
10. ______ Try to meet the other person’s wishes if it seems very important to them.
11. ______ Want the other person to apologize to me.
12. ______ Try to identify lots of solutions before deciding what to do.
13. ______ Will let the other person have some of what they want if they let me have some of what I want.
14. ______ Try to do what is necessary to avoid tensions
15. ______ Sacrifice my wishes for the wishes of the other person
16. ______ Tell the other person that if they don’t agree, I’ll get someone who will back me up.
17. ______ Share the problem with the other person so that we can work it out
18. ______ Try to make everyone feel comfortable.
19. ______ Try to change the subject
20. ______ Try to soothe the other person’s feelings so we can keep our relationship
SCORE TALLY: Put the score for each question in the appropriate column
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II
III
IV
V
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Total
Shark
Owl
Fox
Turtle
Teddy bear
Interpreting your results:
Many people have a tendency towards one conflict resolution style over another (the columns with
the highest scores identifies your default conflict resolution style). What styles did you rate the
highest in? There may be more than one. Note however, that there are times when being a “shark”
is a good idea and there are times when it is best to back down from a conflict.
ACTIVITY 4: Summarizing Conflict Resolution Styles
Instructions:
Review the 5 styles of handling conflict below and complete the Conflict
Resolution Styles Summary Table below.
5 Styles of Handling Conflict
Avoidance (The Turtle)
Not dealing with a given situation
Avoiding is good when
• You don’t care that much about the issue.
• You (or someone else) are very angry and need time to cool off before
discussing the issue.
• You are in a dangerous situation and don’t need to be there.
Avoiding is not good when
• You rarely want to deal with the conflicts in your life.
• You care about an issue but are afraid to speak up (fearful of consequences).
• You keep being bothered by a disagreement with someone you care about.
Turtles Have A Tendency to:
o Attempt to please others at their expense.
o Make poor eye contact.
o Allow self to be interrupted, subordinated and stereotyped
o Withhold information, opinions and feelings
o Are indecisive
o Apologize, avoid and leave
o Change the subject
o Humour others
Aggressive or Confrontational (The Shark)
 Using aggressive behaviour to win a situation with little regard for the
opinions and feelings of other parties involved.
Forcing is good when:
• You need to do something quickly.
• Your conscience tells you to do or not to do something that displeases
others.
• You know you are right and it is important to you that the others recognize
that.
Forcing is not good when:
• You use it often with people you care about or will need to spend time with in the future.
• You want people to feel they can discuss and disagree with you openly.
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Sharks Have A Tendency to:
o Interrupt
o Have intense and glaring eye contact
o Have invading posture and arrogant air
o Conceal information, opinions and feelings
o Are poor listeners
o Dominate
o Are loud, abusive, blaming and sarcastic.
o Manipulate
o Want to win at all costs
o Bully
o Distort truth
o Do not have a positive view of conflict,
o Fearful of being wrong.
Accommodation (The Teddy Bear)
 Giving in or going along with the wishes of the other parties involved in the conflict
despite your opposition to the position
Giving in is good when:
 You are, or were, wrong about something.
 You care more about the other person than you do about the issue.
Giving in is not good when:
 It happens a lot and you wish you could speak up more often.
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Teddy Bears Have A Tendency to:
o Don’t want to hurt the other persons feelings
o Allow the other person to have their way
o Make sacrifices
o Want to maintain the relationship
o Are willing to give in to the other person’s needs and wants
Compromise (The Fox)
 Refers to the process of giving and taking in order to reach an agreement on a
common goal (win-win but also lose-lose)
 Effective method by which to resolve conflict and still meet many (not all) of the
needs of all parties involved
Compromising is good when:
• You need a quick solution and can both give up something.
• You both want exactly same thing and it can be divided up or shared.
• You are willing to let chance decide it (flip a coin…).
• You have tried to satisfy each one completely and it isn’t possible (or would take too long).
Compromising is not good when
• You might work a little longer and find a solution that pleases each one better.
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Foxes Have A Tendency to:
o Willing to give a little to get what they want
o Want things to be fair win-win yet lose-lose
o
Wants everyone to feel comfortable
Collaboration (The Owl)
 Involves the sharing of ideas, identifying the scope of the problem, and
brainstorming different options that may assist in meeting the needs of everyone
 involves treating each other as partners in the problem
 extremely time and energy consuming
 most effective method to use to resolve conflict, but should be saved for the
important issues and the relationships that matter most
 best way to solve a conflict and preserve relationships
Problem solving is good when
 You have the time and want to work something out that satisfies all sides.
 You care about the other person(s) and also feel strongly about the issue.
 You want to get thoughts and feelings out on the table and deal with them, so they don’t cause
problems later.
Problem solving is not good when
 You don’t care that much about the issue.
 You need to do something quickly.
Collaborators have a tendency to:
o Be good problem solvers in search of resolution
o State feelings, needs and wants directly using (I - messages)
o Make good eye contact
o Have straight posture and competent air
o Disclose information and opinions
o Are effective listeners
o Take initiative and take clear positions
o Apologize
o Discuss and listen actively
o Get help as needed
Resolutions Style & Name
Avoidance
Aggressive
Accommodation
Compromise
Collaborator
Definition
ACTIVITY 4: Conflict Resolutions Styles Summary Table
This style is Good when
This Style is Bad When
Common Tendencies
ACTIVITY 5: Identify the Conflict & Resolution Style
Instructions:
1.
2.
3.
4.
With a partner or on your own, read over each scenario and try to identify the type
of conflict and the conflict resolution style used by both parties. You can use
your notes to help you. See the end of this note to check your answers.
After Shinlah's boyfriend publicly makes fun of her new hairstyle, she laughs along with him
and says, "It'll grow back."
When Jordan accuses Drayton of fouling him on purpose during a basketball game, Drayton is
apologetic.
Preya and Anna are playing basketball. Anna fouls Preya. Preya thinks the foul was deliberate
and starts calling Anna names and swears at her.
The boys from student council want to go play pool for their monthly social yet the girls want to
go to the movies. They decide that this month they will go play pool and next month go to the
movies.
Assignment: Become the Advice Columnist
Instructions:
You are to assume the role of an advice columnist for a newspaper and respond to the letter
below. Be sure to include the following information within your response.
a. Clarify the situation by identifying the dynamics of the conflict (i.e. paraphrase the
conflict).
b. Identify three different styles of conflict management that could be used to resolve this
conflict (i.e. avoid, deny, aggressive, collaborative, compromise &/or accommodate). Show
how they could apply each style to this situation while outlining at least one strength and
one weakness for each style chosen.
c. Select one of the management styles as the most likely to succeed and give your reasons
for the choice.
d. Outline specifically what you think could be done to resolve the conflict (e.g. say…, try
to… avoid…, do this, perhaps try to…). Provide direction and possibilities on how they can
resolve the conflict on their own. Identify what each person could have done differently.
Dear Advice Columnist,
My friend and I had a huge fight last week. My parents were away for the weekend and I had to look
after my dog. That weekend, my girlfriend had invited me to a wedding out of town, so I asked my friend if he
would look after my dog for the weekend. He said it would be no problem, so I gave him the key to my house.
When I returned home at the end of the weekend, I found empty beer bottles in the kitchen and dirty dishes in
the sink. He, along with some of his friends, had finished all of my Dad's beer and had helped himself to food
in the fridge. He had also taken a bunch of my CDs. When I asked him why he had done this, he said that I
should just consider it payment for looking after my dog, since it was a hassle. I yelled at him and said he
shouldn't have agreed to look after my dog if it was such a hassle for him. He told me that I was overreacting
and selfish. We don't talk anymore and it really bothers me. I'd like our friendship to continue, but I don't feel
that I should be the one to apologize when I feel that he took advantage of our friendship. How should I
respond to this situation? Is our friendship over?
Sincerely,
Upset in Barrie
Become the Advice Columnist Assignment Rubric
Category
Knowledge &
Understanding
Thinking & Inquiry
Criteria
Level 1
Level 2
Level 3
Level 4
Identify type of conflict and
the escalators to conflict
Identifies type of conflict
and a few relevant
escalators
Identifies type of conflict
and some relevant
escalators
Identifies type of conflict
and most relevant
escalators
Identifies types of conflict
and a1l a1most all
relevant escalators
Identification of factors which
may influence individual's
perception of conflict
Able to identify a few
factors which impact
perception
Able to identify some.
factors which impact
perception
Able to identify most
factors which impact
perception.
Able to identify
a1l/a1most all factors
which impact perception
Identification of three possible
response styles along with
strengths and weaknesses for
each
Identification of one
appropriate response
styles. Limited discussion
of strengths and
weaknesses
Identification of two
appropriate response
styles. Some strengths
and weaknesses identified
for each.
Identification of three
appropriate response
styles. Strengths and
weaknesses identified for
some.
Identification of three
appropriate response
styles. Strengths and
weaknesses identified for
each
Uses appropriate letter format
in response
Demonstrates limited
command of letter format.
Demonstrates moderate
command of letter format.
Demonstrates
considerable command of
letter format.
Demonstrates extensive
command of letter format.
Expresses information and
ideas with clarity
Information expressed
with limited clarity.
Information expressed
with some clarity
Information expressed
with considerable clarity.
Information expressed
with a high degree of
clarity.
Selects an appropriate
response style for the scenario
and provides supporting
rationale along with steps to
resolve conflict
Identification of an
appropriate response style
with limited integration of
supporting rationale and
steps
Identification of an
appropriate response style
with some integration of
supporting rationale and
steps
Identification of an
appropriate response style
with considerable
integration of supporting
rationale and steps.
Identification of an
appropriate response style
with thorough integration
of supporting rationale
and clear steps on how to
resolve
Communication
Application
Answers To Activity 2: Identify the Cause & Type of Conflict
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
Paolo thinks his sister, Katia is always in charge of the remote control. Tonight there is a
special show that Paolo really wants to watch, but Katia changes the channel and the two start
arguing. Interpersonal – conflict between two people: Cause = power struggle.
Elena really wants to play football, but her high school only allows males on the team. Elena
gets together a group of students and parents that believe this is sexist and they approach the
administrative staff of her high school. The school tells this group that there is no female
football team because the females could get injured if they played with the male football team.
Intergroup – conflict between two groups (girls Vs Admin): Cause = Conflicting beliefs.
Uncle Jim and Aunt Edna came to visit. They insisted on sitting at the kitchen table to smoke.
The smoke caused the baby to start coughing. The baby's parents asked them to stop
smoking. Uncle Jim and Aunt Edna suggested that they would leave if they were not welcome.
Intragroup – conflict within a group (family): Cause = values/beliefs; environment/smoke
Intergroup – Conflict between groups (smokers Vs non-smokers).
The McDonald's staff is having a meeting about breaks. Some of the staff is concerned that
other members take very long breaks, leaving others to do all the work. The management and
staff must come to an agreement as how to regulate break times. Intragroup – conflict within
a group (Staff): Cause = resources (time), values/beliefs/upbringing.
Terry bought a slice of pizza from the cafeteria at lunch. As he was walking to his table, he
accidentally bumped into Abdul and the pizza ended up on Abdul's clothes. Terry apologizes,
but Abdul is very upset and it looks like this might escalate into a physical fight. Interpersonal
– conflict between two people: Cause = resources (clothing), values/beliefs.
During World War II, there were many countries involved including Canada, Great Britain, the
United States, Germany and Italy. Intergroup – Conflict between more than 1 group:
Cause = power, resources.
Betul is in the music store and she spots the latest CD of her favorite band, but she does not
have enough money to purchase the CD. Betul starts thinking about the poor security system
the store has. If she stole the CD, nobody would ever know. Intrapersonal – conflict within
the individual: Cause = beliefs/values and/or resources.
The youth club raised $100 at the fundraiser last week and they are having a difficult time
deciding where the money should go. Some of the members think it would be best spent
renovating the club's building. Other members believe it should be spent on the group's next
outdoor camping trip. Intragroup – conflict within the group (youth club): Cause =
resources (money), beliefs, power.
Rapinder is about to leave her house and meet her friends. Her parents are at work and she
knows she really should not take the car without permission. Intrapersonal – conflict within
the person: Cause = beliefs/values, resources.
Answers To Activity 5: Identify the Conflict Resolution Styles
1.
2.
3.
4.
After Shinlah's boyfriend, John, publicly makes fun of her new hairstyle, she laughs along with
him and says, "It'll grow back." Conflict Type: Interpersonal: Shinlah’s Style – Teddy Bear;
John’s Style – Shark.
When Jordan accuses Drayton of fouling him on purpose during a basketball game, Drayton is
apologetic. Conflict Type: Interpersonal: Jordan’s Style – Shark; Drayton’s Style – Turtle.
Preya and Anna are playing soccer. Anna fouls Preya. Preya thinks the foul was deliberate
and starts calling Anna names and swears at her. Conflict Type: Interpersonal: Preya’s
Style – Shark; Anna’s Style – Turtle.
The boys from student council want to go play pool for their monthly social yet the girls want to
go to the movies. They decide that this month they will go play pool and next month go to the
movies. Conflict Type: Intragroup: Boys’ Style – Fox; Girls’ Style – Fox.