Social Exchange Theory Social Exchange Theory: Making Interpersonal Economic Caroline Dillon Texas Christian University Social Exchange Theory I. Summarize Social Exchange Theory Mark Twain once said, “the principle of give and take is the principle of diplomacy - give one and take ten”1. From diplomacy to interpersonal behavior each individual inescapably experiences the tugging between the desire to benefit and the necessity to sacrifice to reach equality between parties. This is a basic and unalterable fact of how society operates and functions to manage and negotiate competing demands in an ever-competitive world. The effects of this core principle were first understood in the field of economics. It became understood that the trade of goods and service was reliant on a calculus of reward versus cost and a subsequent analysis of outcome. All people therefore were assumed to desire a positive outcome, which procured a higher gratification of rewards for a lower amount of cost. Later, communication theorists applied this same methodology to relational behavior to determine the satisfaction, dependence, and stability within a relationship. They discovered that in all three elements of overall attraction to a relationship, the formula of cost versus benefit was a highly effective predictor. From these tenants the Social Exchange theory was conceived and gave birth to a conceptual system that solidified elusive interpersonal behavior into tangible data and evidence. The Social Exchange Theory has revealed the formula imbedded into central human social behavior and made apparent how essential this methodology is to the success of relationships. The Social Exchange Theory (SET) is contingent upon the classic economic principle of rewards versus costs analysis (Schrodt, Lecture X, October 13). Relational negotiation, within the context of this theory, maintains that each actor (partner) assesses the rewards gained from the relationship, whether they are tangible or intangible, versus the perceived costs in remaining committed. This relational ‘calculus’ thus renders the outcome and the overall attraction to the relationship. If the rewards overwhelm the costs, the outcome is viewed as positive and the 1 See works cited page for citation 2 Social Exchange Theory overall attraction to the relationship is higher. However, if the costs overwhelm the rewards, the outcome is viewed as negative and the reciprocal attraction level is markedly lower (Schrodt, Lecture X, October 13). The overall attraction to the relationship does not, however, indicate the overall satisfaction each partner experiences within the relationship. (Nakonezny & Denton, 2008). The interdependence theory establishes that the satisfaction of a relationship is instead based on the comparison levels of alternatives. This aspect of the theory refers to “the lowest level of outcomes that is equal to or greater than what a partner could obtain from some alternative relationship” (Nakonezny & Denton, 2008, p. 405). If a partner perceives greater benefit or reward from an outside alternative, for instance a different partner or career opportunity, they will be subsequently less satisfied then on who perceives no greater alternative (Nakonezny & Denton, 2008). The varying overall attraction and satisfaction levels within a relationship demonstrate the level of interdependence and shared solidarity. One partner’s low level of satisfaction most often leads to a lower amount of commitment to the relationship on the part of the less satisfied. This can cause instability and distress within the relational structure because there is a lack of mutual interdependence and therefore little shared solidarity. Building solidarity, particularly within marriage, necessitates repeated even exchange and “curtailing the levels of alternatives” (Nakonezny & Denton, 2008, p. 405). Asymmetrical power emerges within any relationship when the level of commitment and self-identification to the relationship is not equal among partners. According to Nakonezny and Denton (2008), whoever is most dependent and self-identified, and therefore committed, to the relationship thereby becomes the weaker of the parties. 3 Social Exchange Theory Within SET there are multiple ways unequal or equal status is achieved. In addition to the interdependence theory’s commitment dichotomy, there is the equity theory which addresses the principle of distributive justice. This principle relies on the notion that the party that contributes more to the relationship should inversely also receive more to be considered fair. (Schrodt, Lecture X, October 13). The fairness of a relationship is determined by the comparison of inputs (contributions) and outcome (benefits); if the ratio of the partner’s inputs and outcomes are equal the relationship is considered equitable or fair (Yum & Canary, 2009, p. 385-386). The balance of the relationship can become skewed when one partner is considered or considers him or herself to be ‘overbenefited’ or ‘underbenefited’. Overbenefited individuals receive an inappropriately high amount of benefit compared to the low level of their contribution. The underbenefited party perceives their benefit to contribution ratio to be lower than that of their counterpart (Yum & Canary, 2009, p. 386). This mismatch of distributive justice can become a source of major friction and tension in relationship; being overbenefited often leads to guilt, though being underbenefited is generally the most detrimental and can lead to anger, sadness, or depression (Schrodt, Lecture X, October 13). In response to the disparity, relationships generally seek to re-balance and terminate the inequity. A study by Suzanne Taylor Sutphin of the division of labor within same-sex families demonstrates the dynamic process of SET. In her research, Sutphin “examined division of household labor, using social exchange theory, among 165 survey respondents in a same-sex relationship” (Sutphin, 2010, p.191). Sutphin acknowledged that gender has been considered responsible for hierarchical division of labor in heterosexual homes. Sutphin set out to find how the division of labor functions when gender is not applicable. She hypothesized that a same-sex partner with higher social status variables will be responsible for fewer domestic tasks than their 4 Social Exchange Theory partner with lower social status variables (Sutphin, 2008). Sutphin’s social status variables consist of: education, income, hours of paid labor, employment status, age, and race (2008, p.196). She also hypothesized that high levels satisfaction with division of labor leads to increased levels of satisfaction with the overall relationship (Sutphin, 2008). Her conjectures were supported by her conducted surveys and she found that the higher the hours worked or income of a partner in a same-sex relationship, the less they participated in domestic tasks. Her last hypothesis was also completely validated; her research concluded a high correlation between overall satisfaction and feelings of appreciation and satisfaction with the division of labor. The principles of SET were supported in this study in that “the partner with the most resources decides which household tasks he or she does or does not want to participate in” (2008, p.193). II. Application of SET and Analysis of Case Study The concepts, behaviors, and dynamics of SET are witnessed in authors Alberts and Rabby’s Case Study: “Double Jobs”. The characters of the story, Ray and Shawna, are a working married couple with a young family. Heading into the weekend they are both very busy and have many obligations to honor. Both are being pulled between finishing work, fulfilling commitments to their family, and spending time as a couple. As parents, both Ray and Shawna need to pick up their children from child-care, care for a toddler and infant, and be present for their daughter’s ballet recital. As a family, groceries need to be bought, meals need to be made, and they all need to be at Ray’s mother’s birthday celebration. As a teacher, Ray needs to make lesson plans and grade papers and his boss expects his to go to the school’s Halloween carnival. As an investment banker, Shawna has important potential clients to contact and set up appointments. As a couple, they both feel the pull to stay connected and spend some quality time together. Ray and Shawna are knee-deep in responsibilities and commitments and must negotiate 5 Social Exchange Theory their needs and desires within the relationship to fulfill all that must be done and walk away satisfied. In this hot bed of competing needs and demands, SET is illuminated time and again. Both Shawna and Ray are required to make sacrifices (or costs) to accomplish all that must be done. Because they are a dual-career home, Shawna and Ray must especially make sacrifices for the competing tensions of the other’s job. In the context of this one weekend, Shawna makes provisions for Ray to have some time without children or distractions so he can complete his lesson plans and grade papers. Shawna is sacrificing her free time and time with Ray to take on the responsibility of the children and grocery shopping to give Ray space to work. She however, is rewarded earlier in the day with time to go to her aerobics class. In return Ray does not impose his work commitment of the school carnival on her, and agrees to take their young daughter with him so she can have some quiet hours alone to make phone calls and talk to potential clients. Ray is being cost having Shawna also with him but is being benefited the time to honor his work commitment. This can be seen as one ‘exchange’ in which both parties are being cost and benefited equally. The economic nature of the theory is demonstrated in the nature of their discussion in which a sacrifice is met with a benefit and a benefit is met with a sacrifice. Ray says, “Why don’t I take Maria with me to the carnival while Chuy is napping and you can make your phone calls?” (p.149) To this Shawna replies, “…will [you] watch the kids while I exercise tomorrow morning, I will take them shopping while you work on your classes” (p. 149). The dialogue portrays the calculated trade that takes place within SET. However, not all of Ray and Shawna’s exchanges are always perfectly economical. The competition between professional and personal life often elicits friction and can cause tension or anger within their relationship. While making phone calls, Shawna had been able to secure a 6 Social Exchange Theory meeting with a potential client for the following Sunday afternoon. She felt this would be a big step in her career and get her that much closer to a promotion. She had failed to remember however, that she had promised Ray she would take the children out grocery shopping that afternoon so Ray could have much-needed alone time to get his work done. Ray’s mother’s birthday party was also only two hours after Shawna scheduled her meeting, so she would be possibly cutting into family time. When Shawna tells Ray of her appointment, he becomes angry because their bargain is not being upheld and his sacrifices are not being rewarded with the promised time to himself. Out of anger, he personally attacks her and accuses her of always putting her career first. Though she knows she should be apologetic, Shawna feels defensiveness towards Ray for accusing her of disordered priorities and retaliates with an attack on his success. The deterioration of this conversation exemplifies the destructive effects of mismanaged outcomes and disproportionate benefit status. In this example Ray feels his costs are greater than his rewards and he is unsatisfied with the relationship in that moment. In lieu of the equity theory, he is also feeling underbenefited by Shawna which incites his irritation. As is consistent with research, Shawna feels guilty about the disparity in benefit and seeks to reconcile and recalibrate the levels for mutual satisfaction. She agrees to reschedule her meeting so Ray will have his agreed upon time and she can buy groceries. They are able to resolve their issue, but this conflict typifies the important balance of benefit and sacrifice and the damaging consequences of tipping the scale of distributive justice. After examining specific instances of social exchange within Shawna and Ray’s relationship, it is necessary to answer whether their relationship is actually equitable or if one partner remains over or underbenefited. It seems to far sweeping to qualify their relationship as always equitable or not. They have moments in which equality is and is not achieved. In the 7 Social Exchange Theory previous example, Ray was obviously being underbenefited because his needs and desires were not being met though he had made significant contribution. Shawna’s insistence that she should be able to keep her appointment though it conflicted with her earlier promise to contribute, is an example of her assumption to be overbenefited. On the other hand, there is the issue of Shawna’s income. Though it is not made an explicit point in the case study, Shawna does seem to make a more sizeable income than Ray. Though this may seem an untactful piece of evidence to evoke, Ray is being better benefited by Shawna’s salary then Shawna is of Ray’s. Both of their careers are of personal and financial importance, but when it comes down to the hard evidence of even exchange, Shawna’s career does trump Ray. Aside from these illustrations, the breadth of events and circumstances in this Ray and Shawna’s story depict an overall equitable relationship. Both parents pick up a child on their way home from work each day. Both participate in household chores whether it is Shawna making dinner or Ray cleaning up the kitchen. Both are integrally involved in their children’s lives, for example Shawna breastfeeding the baby or Ray reading bedtime stories with Maria. Without making a chart of each and every interaction between Ray and Shawna, it is impossible to say whether the relationship is truly equitable or not, but it is apparent they both make an outright effort to maintain fair and equal division of labor and tasks within the home and their relationship. III. Critique of Case Study Participants using SET Ray and Shawna would have undoubtedly benefited from understanding this communication theory, especially when managing their own personal feelings about their relationship. Both Ray and Shawna’s inner dialogue admits to feeling tired, stressed and distant from one another. Though they have an overall equitable relationship, the strain of various competing tensions disallows a sense of unity and has driven a wedge between them. According 8 Social Exchange Theory to Nakonezny and Denton’s (2008) research, “[when] interpersonal exchange within the marriage becomes less interdependent; there is less mutual involvement; there is less mutual identification; there is less liking; there is less shared level of compatibility; there is less solidarity; and there is progressive withdrawal of love and affection” (p. 406). Nakonezny and Denton (2008) further explain experiencing the feeling of incompatibility propel the couple away from each other and a return from the dyad back to two individuals. The fact that both feel somewhat isolated and alienated from the other at times is indicative of their struggle to properly balance all that must be done. If they were took the time to disclose how managing their busyness made them felt, they would soon realize that the relational distance stems from the assumption that each is on his or her own to complete their allotted tasks. Though there is not much they could do to avoid how eventful their days are, they could instead derive camaraderie from all they are able to accomplish as a unit. They could enhance their level of interdependence by appreciating the commitment they have to each other as exhibited by the sacrifices and contributions each makes. Instead of each day seeming like an uphill battle, they could instead acknowledge that these struggles are normal and their ability to overcome them is evidence of their strong relationship. In the specific instance of their fight over Shawna’s afternoon meeting, Shawna could have more readily realized that making sacrifices after being benefited is absolutely necessary to maintain fairness. It would also behoove their relational well-being to quiet their thoughts about the alternative of Shawna becoming partner. Though surely tempting to day-dream about a sizeable promotion, it does not help either individual with the present situation and it leaves the solution to something far-off. Both Ray and Shawna would benefit from living in the moment and being content as it is now. 9 Social Exchange Theory Understanding the exchange theory may enable them to better cope with the necessary sacrifices and appreciate the benefits they are given. Instead of feeling guilty for going off to aerobics class, Shawna could feel grateful to have a husband who gives her the opportunity to take time for herself. Instead of personally attacking the other’s character in an argument, they could instead focus on the behaviors that are upsetting them and acknowledge that it is not an issue of personal substance but of cost, benefit, and equity. Because I had previous knowledge of this theory while reading and analyzing the case study, I was able to better understand the dynamics and behaviors being enacted. Before understanding the exchange model I may have been more eager to take Shawna’s side in the argument against Ray. I may have perceived her motives to be justified, and Ray’s response as unreasonable. However, because I understand the necessity for equal cost and benefit I was hoping for Shawna to realize her mistake and to rectify the momentary lapse in judgment. I also saw Shawna’s action to not go out for drinks with her co-workers after signing a new client as a fair and prudent decision. Previously, I may have thought she ‘deserved’ the drink out but it was made clear to me that she would have been abusing the system of relational justice and that Ray deserved time-off just as much as she did. I also better appreciated Ray’s efforts to create dialogue about divvying out tasks and initiating solutions to the conflicting needs. My grasp of how essential it is to manage, delegate, and complete the abundance of Life’s tasks within marriage and family was greatly improved. Instead of viewing it as minor nuances, I now understand it is a cornerstone of a relationship that can make or break success of a couple. It is absolutely fundamental to the health of any relationship, whether friendship or romantic, to be willing to forfeit your own desires for the other and to reciprocate when you have been given the 10 Social Exchange Theory advantage. I know see that maintaining the equity of a relationship is more than “good”, it is integral to maintaining the satisfaction and connectedness experienced. IV. Critique of SET In addition to examining the makeup and merit of the social exchange theory in terms of the case study “Double Jobs”, it is also pertinent to evaluate the theory on the five standard criteria: scope, testability, parsimony, utility, and heurism. The scope refers to the range and quantity of information a theory addresses (“Lecture IIa,” Dr. Schrodt, August 30). The scope of the social exchange theory is exceedingly large. It is attempting to quantify all interpersonal behavior on the presupposition that economic theory and profit calculus are the underlying theme for interaction. The theory is supposing the breadth and width of relationship can be confined to one theory. This seems to be over-reaching and a miscalculation of how much can be contained to one theory. Though the nature of the theory necessitates this “range of phenomena” (“Lecture IIa,” Dr. Schrodt, August 30), it cannot expect to accurately affirm all the ground it covers. This is not to assume that it is wrong or not mostly right, but because of its girth it cannot be completely right. A theory must also be verifiable or testable, meaning that the claims asserted by a communication theorist must be able to be investigated to determine accuracy (“Lecture IIa,” Dr. Schrodt, August 30). The social exchange theory is essentially a formula or equation and therefore highly testable. In addition to Sutphin’s afore mentioned research study, there are scores of other research studies breaching the topic of the social exchange theory and applying it to real-life through survey and observation. The nature of the theory lends itself to a more exact analysis of interpersonal behavior, which can often be difficult to precisely pinpoint. It is not perfect, of course, because investigation is still subject to the finicky perceptions of the surveyed 11 Social Exchange Theory or interviewed participants. Defining and relating every cost and benefit can also prove challenging because they are not limited to the tangible; costs and benefits can also be considered the intangible experience of love, affection, frustration or stress which are much more allusive then say financial security. Though there are some challenges with the theory’s research and investigation, the social exchange theory could easily be considered one of the more testable theories in the discipline of interpersonal communication. Parsimony is the third criterion of theory evaluation. This element emphasizes the need for succinctness and simplicity while simultaneously describing, explaining, and predicting all the appropriate components of a theory (“Lecture IIa,” Dr. Schrodt, August 30). In addition to having a high degree of verifiability, the social exchange theory is also quite parsimonious. The theory fundamentally breaks down to a mere weighing of cost and benefit to determine satisfaction, dependence and stability within relational dynamics (“Lecture X,” Dr. Schrodt, October 13). The rest of the theory then encompasses the interdependence and equity theory which shed greater light onto how people go about analyzing and negotiating the cost-benefit continuum. If the social exchange theory were to be accused of any malfeasant, it would be being slightly too simple. The process the social exchange theory propagates is rather mechanical or mathematical and does not make all the necessary reparations for how fickle humans are. That being said, the theory does do its job of adequately describing and explaining its tenets clearly and concisely. The theory is also scrutinized for its usefulness. Consistent with my claim that Ray and Shawna would have improved their communication behavior if they had knowledge of the exchange theory, it has practical merit and value in real-life. The theory’s strength is forming the abstract concepts of emotion and relational dynamic into a concrete understanding of cause-and- 12 Social Exchange Theory effect and cost-versus-benefit. This enables those to see why tensions or friction accumulates and monitor the current satisfaction, dependence, and stability. The economic foundation of the theory can prove to be its own undoing at times however. According to Nakonezny and Denton (2008), “[the] economic exchange embodies specified obligations, whereas social exchange embodies unspecified obligations” (p.407). Though it proves useful to a point, the theory does not rectify the difference between social and economic interaction. Within economics, there is always a pre-determined obligation and reward; it is steadfast and presupposed. Social interaction does not achieve the same precision. Though there is most often a general expectation of reciprocity, there is no defined or enforced measure of exchange (Nakonezny & Denton, 2008). The social exchange theory is undoubtedly useful in a variety of circumstances, but its limits must also be understood. The final criterion for theory evaluation is heruism, meaning a theory’s ability to “generate new thought or insight” (“Lecture IIa,” Dr. Schrodt, August 30). Because the exchange theory is based on such long-held ideology, it is especially interesting to evaluate if it inspires revitalized investigation. Out of the five theory evaluation mechanisms, it seems heurism is likely its weakest point. Though the theory can be continually utilized in a variety of contexts, the theory in it of itself does not provide much room for adaptation. The insight the theory is able to make will likely be confined to repeated tests of cost-benefit analysis in different cultures, relational structures, and power dynamics. That is, of course, valuable and worthwhile study, but the theory itself is not of a pliable nature that can constantly adjust to the changing world. In conjuncture with the case study, the theory shows its colors and exposes it strengths and weaknesses as discussed in the earlier criteria analysis. The theory gave meaning to where Shawna and Rays struggles and tensions originated: from the natural desire to be benefited after 13 Social Exchange Theory making sacrifice. The case study exhibited how pertinent the ‘economy’ of relationship is to effectively managing satisfaction and overall happiness within a relationship. In the constant onslaught of activity and responsibility, Shawna and Ray desperately needed some mechanism to help alleviate the burden off one person’s shoulders. Analyzing this case study along with the theory presented a moving picture of how a couple experiences these concrete principles in action to reach a fair and equitable status. Though the theory was able to effectively encapsulate many of the interpersonal dynamics, it was not equipped to demonstrate the vivid humanness of this young family. It is always important when analyzing a concrete theory within the context of life-like scenarios to not allow the people to become merely data, or the conversations to become simply an exchange of ‘this for that’. Stepping into the life of this couple humanizes the experience of negotiating cost for benefit and reflects the intricacies of behavior within relationship. Ray and Shawna’s marriage does not merely benefit them with more money in the bank and an extra pair of hands to wash dishes and fold mounds of laundry. They each experience benefit and satisfaction in the mutual affection of their love for each other and emotional support while raising a family together. Even in the midst of their hectic schedules and competing careers, they spend a few intimate moments cuddling by the fire. Though having children has brought incredible stress and responsibility which costs them their freedom to go out for drinks with friends or have consistent alone time, they have moments of pure joy as they read bedtimes stories and listen to nighttime prayers. Ray and Shawna’s story illustrates that relationships are sometimes unfair and a struggle to negotiate but in the presence of love and commitment, it is worth the effort. The theory alone could not portray the same profundity. 14 Social Exchange Theory The economic principles of the Social Exchange Theory give it a solid foundation for assessing complicated and allusive interpersonal dynamics in a uniquely tangible way. All theories, however, have room for improvement. The theory could make reparations to infuse more ‘humanity’ into its underlying themes. It could possibly include another proposition that more closely deals with the solidarity and mutual trust within relationship. The proposition could deal with the cost of having trust broken versus the cost or benefit of how long one has been in relationship with someone and how much one already disclosed to the partner or friend. The theory could also make more effort to emphasize and categorize non-tangible costs and benefits. The theory’s practicality could profit from better promulgating the emotional and internal costs and benefits within relationship for example stress, frustration, longing, appreciation, respect, or affection. Investigating “Double Jobs” in accordance with the SET has helped uncover the dynamic and fluid character of relationship. Shawna and Ray’s relational struggles and successes balancing competing demands demonstrate how SET is practical and is applicable to real-life. Though the theory is not perfect, it proficiently encompassed the spirit of the couple’s dialectics and aided in a fuller understanding the necessary ‘push-pull’ in relationship. The Social Exchange Theory can be a powerful tool to gleaning a better appreciation for the work involved in flourishing relationships, and to understand the paradigm of human nature. 15 Social Exchange Theory Works Cited: Mark Twain. (n.d.). 1-Famous-Quotes.com. Retrieved Tue Dec 6 02:01:12 2011, from 1Famous-Quotes.com Web site: http://www.1-famous-quotes.com/quote/15645 Nakonezny, P. A., & Denton, W. H. (2008). Marital Relationships: A Social Exchange Theory Perspective. American Journal Of Family Therapy, 36(5), 402-412. doi:10.1080/01926180701647264 Sutphin, S. (2010). Social Exchange Theory and the Division of Household Labor in Same-Sex Couples. Marriage & Family Review, 46(3), 191-206. doi:10.1080/01494929.2010.490102 Yum, Y., & Canary, D. J. (2009). Cultural Differences in Equity Theory Predictions of Relational Maintenance Strategies. Human Communication Research, 35(3), 384-406. doi:10.1111/j.1468-2958.2009.01356.x 16