GAPBS Conference
Georgia
Association for Positive Behavior Support
Thursday, December 5, 2013
2:00 – 2:50 p.m.
Teaching the REAL Social Skills
Teaching the REAL
Social Skills
So your students
can be successful
in school!
Convincing you to listen to me Amy C. Zaring
Autism/Behavior Intervention Specialist
Fayette County Schools
zaring.amy@mail.fcboe.org
678-796-5691
Goals of Presentation
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Be AWARE of all the social skills involved in school
Be AWARE that behavior may indicate a social skill
deficit
ACCEPT that social skills must be taught just like
any other skill.
Take away five (5) ideas that you will think
about/use/apply to make you a better teacher – “a
better person” would be a stretch!
When do we perceive that people
have good “social skills”?
When they share space
effectively; often non-verbally.
So, what is it?
Social Skills
Social Pragmatic Skills
Social Cognition
Self-Management/Self Regulation
Social Thinking and Related Skills
Social and Emotional
Development
Kindergarten - Grade 5
Domains of Development
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Cognitive Attainment and Educational Achievement
Health and Safety
Social and Emotional Development
Self-Sufficiency
Social and Emotional
Development
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Characteristics of Well Adjusted Children
– Physical
– Intellectual
– Psychological
– Social
– Personal and Social Assets
Social and Emotional
Development
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5 Qualities Needed for Success
– Patience
– Self-Reliance
– Responsibility
– Relationships
– Self-Control
Social Emphases
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Enhancing Social Awareness
Resisting Provocation
Avoiding Provoking Others
Reading and Interpreting Social Cues
Experiencing Positive Peer Relations
Demonstrating Empathy
Emotional Emphases
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Acquiring Emotional Literacy
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Identifying and Labeling Feelings
Expressing Feelings
Assessing Intensity of Feelings
Managing Feelings
Tolerating Frustration
Cognitive Emphases
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Reorienting Self-talk
Exercising Self-control
Manifesting Impulse Control
Engaging in Productive Problem Solving
Seeking Alternative Solutions to Interpersonal
Problems
Delaying Gratification
Social and Emotional Development
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External Assets
– Support
– Empowerment
– Boundaries and Expectations
– Constructive Use of Time
– Commitment to Learning
– Positive Values
– Social Competencies
– Positive Identity
Acknowledgements
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Dr. Kristin Moore
Camille Smith
Jacquelynne Eccles
Dr. Marc Mannes
Lessons will be learned. . . .
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How do typical kids learn social skills?
How do kids with social cognition deficits learn?
– Missed lessons – deficits
– Wrong lessons – maladaptive behavior
Then they are perceived as “bad” kids.
WE HAVE TO TEACH
THE SKILLS ! ! !
A lack of social skills leads to difficulties in
school, peer rejection, academic failures,
and depression!!!
What are the goals of social skills
instruction?
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increase functional social skills to be used in a
variety of settings
provide a safe environment to practice newly learned
skills
understand a variety of feelings
communicate feelings
develop ways to control feelings
improve problem solving – predicting, understanding,
reading social situations
Other goals 
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develop the ability to modulate behavior and
emotional responses
learn social rules
develop an understanding of main idea in language
and social situations and responding in an organized
way with a focus on the main idea
reduce perseverations and preoccupations
develop insight
appropriately seek help
What social skills are required to
participate in a classroom setting?
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Awareness of the thoughts of others.
Awareness of the hidden rules of the classroom.
Ability to stay focused on the topic.
Ability to manage self when bored so not to
distract others.
Awareness of when is a good time to talk.
Social Skills in the Middle and High School
General Education Setting
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Lessons on working in groups
Lessons on participating in discussions
Lessons on interacting with teachers
Skill of the week – use a “cue” that fits the subject
area
Citizenship training
Expand on County/School word of week or thought
for the day
Individual conferences
Teach Abstract/Inferential
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Clearly teach there are 2 forms of language:
Literal and figurative
Teach kids HOW TO OBSERVE
Teach kids to make “educated guesses”
Teach kids to make connections with what
they see and what they hear
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Emotions and words together
Keeping up in the classroom
Social skills instruction should
include 
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giving students the rationale – convincing them!!!!
stress management
self-esteem
self-confidence
listening skills
coping with bullying, teasing, criticism
recreational/leisure skills
understanding family dynamics
protecting ourselves
advocating and seeking help
developing positive character traits
But here is the question How can we tackle some of those
REAL
social skills in the special education and
general education settings –
and across a school?
Ideas on where to begin in
schools:
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Recognize the difference between how we
assess students academically and deficits in
social cognition. Measuring one domain
may not reveal the other!
Realize that work to increase social
awareness will also help within the
classroom
Realize that smart kids can have significant
social cognitive disabilities.
TEACH social skills!
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Set behavioral standards, and help the student learn WHY and
HOW his behavior falls within or outside of those standards.
Appreciate that kids with social cognitive deficits are bullied and
teased by socially savvy students more than any adult can
imagine. Establish a ZERO TOLERANCE policy for bullies in
schools! DON’T tell kids that they just need to put up with it
since all kids are teased! Develop a social thinking group on
every campus to help teach students how to relate to others
and how to cope with negative social relationships.
Appreciate that teaching ALL students about perspective taking
is VALUABLE, even if not MEASUREABLE!
Creating a Positive School Climate
- A setting where people appreciate
individuality and contributions
- All students know they are valued and
respected members of the school community
Positive School Climate
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Learn and use student’s names and know
something about each one.
Use homeroom time to build a sense of
community. Provide opportunities for
conversation among students.
Provide unstructured time when students can
practice social skills with peers and receive
feedback.
Positive School Climate
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Encourage journal writing to improve selfawareness.
Provide extracurricular activities that don’t
require tryouts or auditions. Provide
accommodations as needed.
Provide opportunities for the students to give
feedback about their daily experience at
school; take that input seriously.
Positive School Climate
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Make a point of connecting informally with
individual students having difficulties; the
student will then feel notices and cared for;
adult will also be more aware if the student
needs a more formal intervention
Embedding Social Skills
Instruction
in Inclusive Settings
Embedding - Assessment
Identify skill vs performance deficits
Key!!!!
Is it motivation?
Is it non-compliance?
Is it stress?
Or, are these things caused by a skills deficit?
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Embedding - Assessment
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Monitor behavior – take data!
Select and prioritize replacement skills.
This one is harder than you think!
Conduct reinforcement surveys.
Make a plan; meet with the student(s).
Embedding - Instruction
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Engage in daily morning meeting activities
that practice skills.
Take advantage of teachable moments.
Connect social behaviors to academic skills.
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waiting; turn-taking; listening to others; etc.
Embedding - Instruction
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Teach social skills the same way you teach
academics.
Teach social skills in context.
Role play!
Provide examples and non-examples.
Embedding - Maintenance
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Use self-monitoring.
Provide reinforcements.
Provide prompts and cues.
Provide feedback.
Embedding - Generalization
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Involve other members of the school faculty.
Involve parents!
The Hidden Curriculum
Unstated Rules in Social
Situations
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We are surrounded on a daily basis by such
unstated rules or customs that make the
world a confusing place. This is known as
the hidden curriculum.
The hidden curriculum contains items that
impact social interactions, school
performance, and sometimes safety.
The Hidden Curriculum:
Reading the Hidden Curriculum of Body
Language
Differs Across Age
Differs Across Gender
Differs Depending on Who You Are With
Cultures Each Have Their Own Hidden
Curriculum
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Where is the Impact?
School
Home
Community
Workplace
Legal System
Examples of areas of “hidden
curriculum” -
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Bathroom Rules
Clothing
Friendships in the Classroom
School Locker Room
School Dances
Bullying and Tattling
Telling Jokes
The “4” Greatest Things to Know
Make them a part of what you naturally do in
your classroom every day!
Live Out Loud
Do-Overs
TEACH the Routines, Rules, and
Procedures
Check-Ins
Live Out Loud
As a teacher, model your thought process OUT
LOUD whenever possible:
“I am feeling really stressed right now…..”
“I have this problem…..”
“Let me think what I need to do this….”
“We are going to the media center, but….”
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Share the agenda/plans – state the obvious
– “live out loud”
Simplify the language – “reading between the
lines” – understanding abstract concepts like
sarcasm – interpreting facial expressions or
body language - Avoid: “cute” names, idioms,
double meanings, teasing
“Do-Overs”
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Would you like to do that over?
Why don’t you try that again?
Would you like to make a different choice?
TEACH
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TEACH students what you want them to do!
(We too often focus on what we don’t want
them to do!)
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Learning the “rules” of a situation and/or
setting is a social skill – and learning how to
function successfully in that teacher’s
classroom is a part of social skills!
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Rules
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Make the rules clear
Post the rules
Remind the student of the rule(s)
Give a personal copy when necessary
Highlight the most significant rules
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Procedures/Routines
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Teach the procedures
Role-play the procedures
Give reminders about the procedures
Provide student with a checklist of routines –
morning routine, packing up routine, getting ready
for lunch routine, at-the-locker routine
Check-ins!!!
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Determine what “plan” or language will be
used – a number or color scale – or student
decided!
Ask “Where are you?”
Student should respond.
Teacher’s response based on student!
Proactive Component
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Stress Management must be taught
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Students can’t be expected to do something they haven’t
been taught
Developing lesson plans – teach specific stress
management techniques and when to use them!
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Deep Breathing
Count to Ten
Happy Book/Poster/Pictures
Relaxation Techniques – Use Scripts
Creative Visualization
Progressive Muscle Relaxation
When to teach When students are calm  Beginning of class
 End of class
 Practice before a test
 During morning work
 Role model why a good time to use
Stress Management Toolbox
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Classroom Tool Box – have a visual representation.
Each Student has a toolbox – a visual representation that can
be referred to.
The “tools” are the stress management techniques the student
has learned.
Students add to the tool box as they learn new strategies.
Creating Your Tool Box
Break Systems
Taking a break! The student is going to end up missing
instruction or leaving your classroom AFTER the
behavior – why not teach taking a break BEFORE
the behavior!
Table Breaks
In-room Breaks
Away Breaks
TEACH the system – what is allowed, when, and for
how long!
Table Breaks
should occur at early signs of frustration or escalation.
They
involve short breaks that the student can do at his/her
desk or
Examples include: head down on desk, turning his
paper over, pushing himself away from his desk,
stretching arms & legs up and out (making sure not
to touch anyone sitting next to him), standing up
briefly and pushing on his desk (without moving
desk).
Local or In-Room Breaks
breaks that the Student can take if he/she is feeling
mildly stressed
needs to get up from his/her desk but does not require
leaving the room
students should be taught what to do/what is allowed
and for how long
Examples include: sharpen a pencil; get a tissue;
stretch in the back of the room; go to designated
spot
Away Breaks
Break will take longer; student’s behavior will become
disruptive if doesn’t have a change
Examples include:
-Wall push ups
-Bathroom break
-Drink of water
-A few walks up and down the hallway
-Errands (non reinforcing)
-See the counselor or designated adult
Social Problem Solving
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Have a class template for solving a problem
– it should list pros and cons, the choice
made.
Have a method or form for predicting what
will be “faced” that day -
Understanding Perspective...
Considering the thoughts and emotions,
motive, intentions, beliefs, prior
experiences and personality of yourself
and others around you.
Use literature to teach social skills – at all
grade levels!
Four steps to Perspective Taking
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I think about you.
I think about WHY you are near me or talking
to me. What is your intent?
I think about what you are thinking about me
I monitor and regulate my behavior to keep
you thinking about me the way I want you to
think about me!
Social Autopsies
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Take apart a situation with a student who is upset
by something that happened or confused by
something that happened
Can be done through discussion when student is
not upset
Goal is to help student understand what happened
and PERSPECTIVE TAKING
Can be done in writing
Many, many examples of forms 
The autopsy allows for analyzing a social skills
problem by dissecting social incidents. When a
social error occurs, the student with AS works with
an adult to (a) identify the social error or mistake,
(b) determine who was harmed by the mistake, (c)
decide how to correct the mistake, and (d) develop
a plan to ensure that the mistake does not reoccur.
Debriefing
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Briefer discussions that have the same goal
as social autopsies
Pair with Check-ins
Finding Your Place
Students need to know where they fit in
and
they need to find some contentment in school.
Lunch Partners/Bunch
Choose specific students – think about the
grouping! Decide how often. Should some
students have “training?”
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Start a “game” club or an extracurricular club.
Give the student “jobs” across the school.
Have the student help with morning
announcements.
Social Games
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To promote social situations between children with disabilities
and typical peers
Short activities – 10 to 15 minutes in length
Structured activity – groups assigned prior to lesson
Any activity that will promote interaction between peers
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Jump rope
Play catch
Duck, duck, goose
Toss bean bags
Handout
“SELF”
Self-Advocacy
Self-Esteem
Self-Confidence
Make sure the students knows his or her
accommodations –
And knows how to ask for them!
Replace the function of the behavior –
If the function is “escape/avoidance”
are all the academic accommodations
being provided?
If the function is “attention” –
Can we find other ways for the student to
receive attention?
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Have we provided student with an effective
way of communicating to us?
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Self-determination (choices/preferences)
Need to escape or be alone
Communicating “I need help.”
Provide opportunities for variable
grading
All kids get tired of low grades all the time!
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Give student a
“time to shine.”
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Catch him or her
“being good.”
“Give it Up Strategy”
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Choose an “item” that represents the class.
Every student gets the “item.”
Establish a goal to “give it up.”
Make sure all students participate.
Examples: pay a compliment, ask a question
of the teacher, ask a question of a peer, work
without talking, smile!
Build Independence
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Checklists –
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Elementary – pictures or words – routines,
procedures, schedule, center order, etc.
Middle – words – routines, procedures,
reminders, class assignments, etc.
High – words or blank – what to do this period,
steps of a lab or project, etc.
Teach Abstract/Inferential:
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Clearly teach there are 2 forms of language:
Literal and figurative
Teach them HOW TO OBSERVE
Teach them to make “educated guesses”
Teach them to make connections with what
they see and what they hear
–
–
Emotions and words together
Keeping up in the classroom
Negotiation
Let class determine the parameters of
assignment or the grading system.
“We could read all of this silently, out
loud, or individually, and then discuss.”
“I think you need to do all these
problems; how do you think you can show
me what you know?”
Make sure students say pros/cons and discuss!
Provide student(s) with choices:
Allow student to create the schedule.
Allow student to create the checklist.
 Allow a day when students can “swap jobs.”
 Playing games teaches negotiation
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choice of game, sharing, your turn, winning/losing
Across the Curriculum
Relate to government and history topics.
Hold debates.
Embed Opportunities for Choice
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Materials within an activity
Among different activities
Refuse an activity
People to be included or excluded
When the activity occurs
Type of writing tool (pen, colored pencil, marker) or
computer
Order of assignments
How to turn in your assignment
When you read aloud
Self-Monitoring
Self-monitoring empowers students!
What are the benefits of teaching
students to self-manage?
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Strategies can be differentiated
Less invasive than teacher-managed
strategies
Have higher levels of self-efficacy,
motivation, and school achievement
Use of appropriate help-seeking behaviors to
learn how to do things independently
Can use to manage a variety of behaviors
Teach students to monitor their own
behavior –
Identify the target behavior.
Define the target or a replacement behavior.
Conference with the student.
Select the self-monitoring procedure – teach
the procedure to the student.
Teach students to monitor their own
behavior –
Implement the self-monitoring.
Use specific verbal praise.
Monitor student progress.
Maintenance and follow-up.
Teach students to monitor their own
behavior 
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Index card for tally marks
Form with multiple dates/tally marks.
“+ or –” or “yes or no” or “smiley face”
Small sheet of questions “Today I . . .”
“Was I Doing My Work?” Time/Yes or No
Rate your performance (1=NI, 2=OK, etc.)
Student and teacher rate
Teach students to monitor their own
behavior 
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Number of times blurted out/raised hand.
Number of times used appropriate words.
On-task behavior/working on assignment.
Work completion/problems finished.
I followed directions.
I remained cool and calm.
I kept my hands to myself.
Peer-Mediated Social Skills
Intervention Methods
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Group or individual sessions
Same-age peers (best)
Trained peers (best)
Peer academic tutoring
Circle of Friends
Peer proximity
Peer initiating
Peer prompting and reinforcing
Peer-Mediated Intervention
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Peer Proximity
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The peer model works and plays next to a
particular child to provide opportunities for
observation of desired behaviors.
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Peer Prompting and reinforcement
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Peer model will prompt verbally, targeted student
will practice the skill (respond appropriately to the
activity or play prompt), and peer model will
provide reinforcement such as verbal praise or a
high five.
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Peer Initiation
Peer model is directed to initiate or request
to be paired with the targeted child.
Resources
The following slides are the
additional resources used for this
presentation.
Winner, Michelle Garcia. Inside Out: What
Makes a Person With Social Cognition
Deficits Tick? Published by the Author.
California, 2000. Available at:
socialthinking.com
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Winner, Michelle Garcia. (2007). Thinking
About You Thinking About Me: Teaching
Perspective Taking and Social Thinking to
Persons with Social Cognitive Learning
Challenges (2nd Edition). San Jose, CA:
Think Social Publishing, Inc.

www.socialthinking.com
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http://specialed.about.com

Embed Social Skills Instruction in Inclusive
Settings. Nicole S. Fenty, Melissa A. Miller,
and Andres Lempi. Intervention in School
and Clinic 2008 43: 186.
Online version of article:
http://isc.sagepub.com/content/43/3/186
Dunn, Michelle A. S.O.S. Social Skills in Our
Schools. Autism Asperger Publishing Co.
Shawnee Mission, Kansas: 2006.
Preparing for Adult Life: Important Social Skills
for High School Students. Christine D.
Bremer, Sharon Mule, and John G. Smith.
Impact. Volume 24, Number 1,
Spring/Summer.

Myles, Brenda Smith, Melissa L. Trautman,
and Ronda L. Schelvan.
The Hidden Curriculum: Practical Solutions
for Understanding Unstated Rules in Social
Situations. Autism Asperger Publishing Co.
Shawnee Mission, KS: 2004.
Increasing Prosocial Behaviors of Young
Children With Disabilities in Inclusive
Classrooms Using a Combination of PeerMediated Intervention and Social Narratives.
Sanna Harjusola-Webb, Sophia Parke
Hubbell, and Pena Bedesem. Beyond
Behavior. Winter 2012, Volume 21, Issue 2.
Step-by-Step: Teaching Students to SelfMonitor. Rafferty, Lisa A. TEACHING
Exceptional Children, Vol. 43, No. 2, pp. 5058.
Designed for Teachers: How to Implement
Self-Monitoring in the Classroom.
Vanderbilt, Allison A. Beyond Behavior, Fall
2005.