Wedding Manual
A collection of resources pulled together by Michael Teulon, to help assist in your
Ceremony planning.
General Information
Page 2
Framework for a Ceremony
Page 6
Examples
Introductions
Page 7
Giving Away
Page 17
Endorsements
Page 18
Asking
Page 19
Vows
Page 21
Ring ceremonies
Page 23
Alternative Inclusions
Page 26
Poetry and Readings
Page 29
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General Information
This manual has been put together to assist in creating your very own Wedding
Ceremony.
The Framework and Examples are provided as only a guide. Obviously, you are more
than welcome to include them (in part or full) but alternatively, they may also help to
stimulate your own creativity, enabling you to write your own ceremony.
Examples are from various sources including; the internet, past clients, material I have
written myself and material written by fellow celebrants. The material is intentionally
varied to meet the requirements of a diverse range of couples, so I warn you “Read
with Caution – some material may offend your taste”.
Creating your own Ceremony
I suggest you begin by reading through examples of Full Ceremonies I have included in
this folder. This should give you a better feel for the general flow and structure. Once
you have done this, you may be in a better position to draft your very own ceremony,
and choose specific examples.
Whether you write your own ceremony or personalise an existing one, the most
important thing to remember is to “make it yours”. It should reflect you and your
partner and what you share.
If you do get stuck I am more than happy to put together a simple ceremony for you,
one that you can then personalise. A soft copy of this Manual is available at
www.sydneymarriagecelebrant.info.
Structure of a Ceremony
Timing
Generally the over all ceremony would be about 30 minutes, from the time the bride
arrives through the spoken ceremony, the signing up to the point where people come
up to congratulate you. The actual spoken ceremony in this case would last about 10
and 15 minutes. Much longer and you may find your guests losing focus. Remember
too, that generally, your guests will be standing for the entire ceremony. Similarly, a
ceremony shorter than 5 to 6 minutes may leave your guests wondering “if that was it
?”.
Including Others
Your wedding ceremony, is also a very important occasion for your friends and family,
so you may like to include them as well. Traditionally you may like them to be part of
the bridal party but you may also wish to include them in other ways. You may like to
ask them to give a reading or a blessing. They may perform the role of a ring bearer
or an usher. All the parents can be included in an Endorsement or the entire guest list
can “give you away”. You may also like to ask someone to sing, play music or read a
poem. Children can also be included. There is no limit to how you can involve others in
your ceremony.
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Alternative Inclusions
You may like to include an alternative ceremony as a substitute or in addition to the
standard ceremony. Examples may include; a Rose Ceremony, a Ring Warming or a
Candle Ceremony. Or maybe there is something a little different like a tree planting
ceremony you may like to include.
Rehearsal
A rehearsal or more accurately a “walk through” serves an important purpose. It
enables us to block through the entire ceremony from your arrival to your departure.
We can consider and develop a plan to make the whole ceremony flow smoothly on
the day and make sure you get exactly what you want. Generally we would hold the
rehearsal on location if the venue and distance permitted.(we can discuss this). The
rehearsal is generally held about 1 week out from the actual ceremony. The entire
bridal party is welcome to attend but this is not necessary (although it can be a good
excuse for a social get together and maybe a drink).
Wet Weather Option
An out door wedding is a fantastic idea but it does leave you vulnerable to the
elements. I know it is something that you may not wish to think about but it is important
to have a contingency plan, just in case. The reception venue may be able to
accommodate – so check with them first.
NB Ironically, rain, traditionally is symbol of new life and new beginnings.
Ceremony Time
I would normally suggest that you invite your guest to arrive 10 -15 minutes prior to
the time you expect your ceremony to begin. That way you will hopefully avoid your
guests racing you “up the aisle”. People can be delayed for various reasons and it is
important to remember that it may be the first time many of your guests have been to
the particular venue.
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Other Important Stuff
Please take this the right way, I definitely don’t want to offend, however I think it is
important to ensure we all have the same expectations and thus hopefully avoid
misunderstanding and so ensure the perfect ceremony.
Ceremony Time
You will need to notify me of the ceremony start time when you make your booking. If
you wish to change this you will need to confirm with me first in case I have since
made additional engagements.
I never like to rush you, but I must reserve the right to leave if your ceremony is
delayed by 30 minutes or more. If I can wait, I am happy to, but if I have another
engagement I will have to depart and return later to perform the ceremony.
Props, Costumes and Materials
I can provide you with a PA, signing table and Mont Blanc Pen.
However, you are responsible for providing additional props, costumes and equipment
if required. Examples: candles.
I am always happy to offer advice on where you may be able to source such
materials.
Additional Charges
My price includes my full service however you are responsible for additional, out of
pocket, expenses. These include;
Certificate of Marriage – Issued by Births, Deaths and Marriages- Optional
On your wedding day I will provide you with a Certificate of Marriage from the
Commonwealth Government. However, if you would like to receive a Certificate of
Marriage from Births, Deaths and Marriages NSW, (required for Change of Name or
other legal purposes) you can arrange that directly with B,D and M.
City Parking – Generally around $15-$30.
Examples: Ceremonies at the Royal Botanical Gardens, Opera House, Wharfs other
City Venues
Taxis and Water Taxis – If your ceremony is on a boat or island I would still arrive 30
minutes prior and would need to leave no longer than 20 minutes after the ceremony.
Thus to achieve this I may require you to provide and pay for a Water Taxi.
Distance Travelled to Ceremony - I am happy to travel to venues both for the rehearsal
and the actual ceremony which are considered to be within a reasonable distance from
my base in Balmain. Generally, I would consider this to be within a 30 minute radius of
Balmain.
Obviously I am happy to travel further a field but I would then need to charge travel
time and cost, please feel free to discuss
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Payment
To guarantee your booking a deposit is required. Until this deposit is received I am
unable to confirm your booking. Full payment, including additional charges (parking,
Distance, water taxis) must be made, at the latest at our last meeting prior to your
wedding day.
Note: All prices include GST.
The Resources Manual
You are welcome to hang onto the manual up until we see each other at the rehearsal
when you can return it in person or post it back to me. However, if you lose the manual
or you would like to keep it there is a charge of $15 (replacement value) which will
need to be paid in addition to and at the same time as the total fee.
Thank you for taking the time to read through the above, I hope I didn’t sound like I
was “laying down the law”. Please feel free to discuss any of the above.
Conclusion
Start work on your ceremony and book a rehearsal time and date (with me) as early
as possible. That way you will avoid the last minute rush and be able to enjoy the
whole process.
Please do not hesitate to call or email me if you have any question.
Good luck and enjoy the process!
Michael Teulon
Authorised Marriage Celebrant
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Ceremony Framework and Work Sheet
You may use this form to record your selection for your ceremony
Step
No.
1
Heading in Ceremony Outline
Introduction
I will present the Introduction on your
behalf. Please enter segment
reference for Opening and Body.
2
“My name is Michael Teulon and I am a Marriage Celebrant, duly
authorised to solemnise this marriage, in accordance with the laws of
Australia.”
Readings
This is generally given by a family
member or friend.
Could you also include their name and
their relationship to you.
3
Monitum for Marriage
This is the compulsory warning I must
give
4
“Before you I can join you (Full Names) in marriage, in the presence of
these witnesses and myself, I must remind you of the solemn and binding
nature of the relationship into which you are about to enter. Marriage,
according to the law of Australia is the voluntary and full commitment of
a man to a woman and a woman to a man. It is made in the deepest
sense, to the exclusion of all others and entered into for life.”
The Giving Away
Could you please state the name of
the person & their relationship to you
& reference
5
The Asking
6
The Vows
“I call upon the persons present to witness that from today
I, Full Name, take you, Full Name, as my husband/wife/ spouse”
7
The Ring Ceremony
8
Declaration of Marriage
9
Signing of Register
Example: “Having now promised to share your lives together, in front of
your witnesses and in accordance with your vow, I can now pronounce
you, husband and wife. You may kiss the bride”
Please provide Full names of
Witnesses and Check witnesses are
over 18. If possible, please make
sure that a table & chair are available
at the venue
10
Congratulations How would
you like to be introduced following the
signing. Eg. “Nicole and Kevin” or “Mr
and Mrs Smith” or “Nicole and Kevin”
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Introduction
The Introduction sets the tone for the ceremony. It gives me (on your behalf) an
opportunity to welcome your guests and let them know why they have been
invited.
I have split the Introduction into Openings and Bodies to help simplify the
process. Feel free to add, delete or mix examples to create your own
Introduction – one that reflects you and what you want to say.
Minimum Requirement
Legally I must introduce myself as a marriage celebrant and explain that I will
be marrying you both. I general include the following somewhere in the
opening.
“My name is Michael Teulon and I am a Marriage Celebrant, duly authorised to
solemnise the marriage here, this afternoon, in accordance with the laws of
Australia.”
Introduction – Openings
Introduction – Opening 1
To begin, On behalf of Bride and Groom, I would like to welcome you here
today.
We are all here today to celebrate with Bride and Groom a very important
moment in their lives. They started out as friends and have over time learned to
know and love each other and have now decided to spend the rest of their lives
together, as husband and wife.
Introduction – Opening 2
Bride and Groom have chosen us to be with them on their special day. And I am
sure that we are all here to offer our support for this marriage and to wish them
every happiness for their lives together.
They are delighted that so many of you have travelled great distances to be
with them and hope that this evening is one of happiness, celebration and
above all fun.
Introduction – Opening 3
We are all here today for a very special occasion – Bride and Groom’s
wedding. Over the years they have learned to know and love each other and
have now, finally decided to join their lives together, a life as husband and
wife.
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Introduction – Opening 4
Ladies and Gentlemen, it is my very great pleasure to welcome you to this most
joyous occasion – Bride and Groom’s wedding day. They are delighted that you
all have been able to join them in this expression of their love for one another,
especially those of you who have travelled from great distances to be with them
today.
Introduction – Opening 5
Bride and Groom are pleased that all of you are able to be here today to
witness their public affirmation of their partnership as they commit to spend the
rest of their lives together – a life as husband and wife. They also wish to make
that commitment in the presence of the people who are most important to them
– you, their much loved family and friends.
Introduction – Opening 6
Bride and Groom welcome you here today to share with them their joining
together as one. This is a joyous occasion for them as they have decided to
seal their love with this marriage, and have invited us to share in their
happiness.
Introduction – Opening 7
Bride and Groom have invited us here to day to witness the commitment they
have for each other. Having come together they have decided that they would
like to recognise their love for one another in marriage and are delighted you,
their friends and family, have made the effort to be here today and support
them in their decision.
Introduction – Opening 8
Bride and Groom welcome you here today to share with them their joining
together as one. This is a joyous occasion for them as they have decided to
seal their love with this marriage, and have invited us to share in their
happiness.
Introduction – Opening 9
We are here today to share a most important moment in Bride and Groom’s
lives.
They were lucky enough to find each other in the murky depths of cyber space
and were stubborn enough to survive the perils of their first dates.
Now Bride and Groom have come to know and love each other and have
decided to declare, in front of old and new friends, their intention to make a life
together, a life that will be made with care and love to last a lifetime.
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Introduction – Opening 10
We are here today to share with Bride and Groom a most joyous occasion.
They have decided to seal their love with this marriage and have invited us to
share in their happiness. Family and friends are important to them, as are
traditions, and marriage is one of the most important traditions we follow. From
now on each partner will consider the other person's desires and needs are
equal, if not more important, to their own.
Introduction – Opening 11
They feel honoured and privileged that you, their close family and friends, are
able to share this special rite of passage with them. For this they give their
heartfelt thanks in spite of the honour they have bestowed upon us by asking us
to bear witness to such a magical moment in their lives.
Bride & Groom want you to know how important you are to them and would
like to express their happiness at becoming part of such a loving and supportive
family. They feel immensely proud and happy today.
Introduction – Opening 12
On behalf of Bride and Groom, I would like to welcome you. We are here
today on this very special occasion for us all - Bride and Groom’s wedding.
They have chosen us to be with them on their special day as they prepare to
exchange their marriage vows, as a statement of their caring for us and to
indicate their belief that all of you support them in their decision to be married.
We are here to offer our support for this marriage and to wish them every
happiness for their life together. They are delighted that many of you travelled
from great distances to be with them and hope that the evening is one of joy for
you all - as it is for them.
Introduction – Opening 13
Ladies and Gentlemen, Boys and Girls, it is my very great pleasure to welcome
you to this most joyous occasion – Bride & Groom’s wedding day. They are
delighted that you all have been able to join them in this expression of the love
for one another, especially those of you who have travelled from great
distances to be with them today.
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Introduction Body
Introduction – Body 1
In society today, marriage has become a less obvious choice for two people in
love. "It's just a piece of paper" people say. And in a few minutes I will ask
Bride and Groom to sign "a piece of paper" as evidence of their marriage here
today.
But by the time they sign “the piece of paper” in their hearts and in ours, they
will already be married.
Because it is not about the scribe on a piece of paper that seals their marriage.
It is about the courage and commitment it takes to stand up in front of their
friends and family, people they love and respect, and make a promise that will
last the rest of your lives. It's a pretty big call.
So, family and friends don't think you are here today as innocent bystanders,
because you’re not. You are here, today, to participate. You are going to
perform a role far more important than any piece of paper. You are here
today as witnesses, as Bride and Groom make their promise of love, a potential
that will take a life time to fulfil.
Introduction – Body 2
Bride and Groom, believe that marriage is the supreme sharing experience and
an adventure in the most intimate of human relationships.
They have chosen to take this step after a short period of time as a statement of
confidence in their love and commitment towards each other.
Their belief in the power of the family unit, their shared values and their
commitment to maintain their individuality will carry them through the inevitable
challenges that life will bring.
They envisage a strong, happy, adventuress and loving union. Through their
marriage they hope to maintain above all mutual respect and support as each
other’s best friend
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Introduction – Body 3
Marriage is a commitment to life - to the best that two people can find and
bring out in each other. It offers opportunities, sharing and growth no other
human relationship can equal. A physical and emotional joining that is promised
for a lifetime.
Within the circle of love, marriage encompasses all of life's most important
relationships. A wife and a husband are each other's best friend, confidant,
lover, teacher, listener and critic.
Marriage understands and forgives the mistakes love is unable to avoid. It
encourages new experiences and new ways of expressing love through the
seasons of life.
When two people pledge to love and care for each other in marriage, they
create a spirit unique to themselves, which binds them closer than any spoken or
written words.
Marriage is a promise, a potential made in the hearts of two people in love,
which takes a lifetime to fulfil.
Introduction - Body 4
Bride and Groom, were lucky enough to find each other in the murky depths of
Newtown and were stubborn enough to survive the perils of courtship – not to
mention lucky enough to survive a couple of years in Adelaide!
Vital to their success as a couple was realising very early on that the limelight
wasn’t big enough for both of them, so they made the limelight bigger. With
insights like this it was only a matter of time before one hot summer night, whilst
sitting drunkenly in their underpants, they both came to the conclusion that
marriage was a fabulous idea.
Introduction – Body 5
Marriage, is a big and serious undertaking. As Rainer Maria Rilke said: “More
belongs to marriage than four legs in a bed. “and there is no sure-fire do-ityourself kit. This ceremony celebrates the net of friendships within which Bride
and Groom’s relationship began and affirms their belief in the necessity of
friendships for their relationship to thrive. Bride and Groom need to have you
all around.
Above all, this is a joyful occasion. Bride and Groom choose to affirm and
express their love by getting married. Their wedding ceremony is a special,
spiritual place where their joy can be shared with you all and so increased and
strengthened.
(Explain about the rings) These wedding rings represent the never-ending cycles
of giving and receiving, and the birth, death and rebirth of life and love. Please
pass them around. Let your hands and heart hold them for a moment and let
them come back to Bride and Groom full of your warmth.
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Introduction – Body 6
Bride and Groom understand that there are no guarantees in marriage.
Marriage is a work of love. It calls for two people to remain individuals while
building around themselves a world that they call their own. Real love is not
being totally absorbed in each other. It is looking outward in the same
direction, together. Love makes burdens lighter because you divide them, it
makes joys more intense because you share them. It makes you stronger so you
can reach out and become involved with life in ways you dared not risk alone.
Together you will face the challenges life will inevitably throw at you. At these
times; always speak the truth and listen attentively, inspire each other, say "I
love you" often and laugh a lot too, even when you're angry, and remember
you are each other's best friend.
Introduction - Body 7
Family and friends are important to Bride & Groom, as are rites of passage,
and Marriage is one of the most important rites we follow. It is a sharing of
goals and decision-making. A commitment from the heart and mind based on
mutual love, trust, respect and the understanding that from now on, each partner
will consider the other's desires and needs as equal to their own.
Real love between a man and a woman is unconditional and perhaps the
highest experiences that is possible to humankind. Such love reduces selfishness,
deepens personalities, promotes growth, but above all, gives life new purpose
and meaning.
When we think about this union between Bride and Groom we take heart; this
marriage encourages all of us, because when a man and a woman find this kind
of joy and happiness in their lives, it says something to all mankind of the
possibilities in life.
Introduction - Body 8
We have all been invited to assemble here on this happy day to witness the
official union of these two lovers, and to join in the public celebration of their
joy and delight in finding one another. Let us all be together in friendship and
love, sharing this scene and these precious moments which join this couple. Bride
and Groom let us consider the belief that you have in each other, and the fact
that you are ready to proclaim publicly to us, your love, in this special rite of
passage, as you move from being single to the permanent status of a married
couple.
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Introduction – Body 9
In deciding upon a suitable introduction, Bride & Groom came to the only
conclusion. Their love is so total that they consider it a precious gift. They will
nurture it through all its stages of development. They know this will not be an
easy commitment, but intend to honour the privilege of its blessing.
Bride and Groom are thankful that they have found such happiness in each
other, and even more thankful that you have joined in this beautiful and
traditional sharing of its expression.
Introduction – Body 10
Bride and Groom are pleased that all of you are able to be here today to
witness their public affirmation of their partnership as they commit to spend the
rest of their lives together – a life as husband and wife. They also wish to make
that commitment in the presence of the people who are most important to them
– you, their much loved family and friends.
Bride and Groom have chosen to take this step of marriage to say to the world
"We are together, we are a team and we have something very special we
would like to acknowledge". Through their marriage Bride and Groom also
have the opportunity to create something new and exciting together. They
envisage a strong, joyful and happy union.
Their marriage will be based on values of acceptance, respect, sharing,
openness and unconditional love given freely to each other. Through their
marriage, they will be each other's best friend as well as lover.
Introduction – Body 11
Bride & Groom believe that a happy marriage will enable them to establish a
home where there will be love and stability. A home where you, their family
and their friends, will find welcome, peace, love and support, strengthened
today, by this ceremony.
Bride & Groom are ecstatic that their experiences have brought them to the
place where they are ready to fulfil what is theirs to accomplish in this life, to
join the forces of their individual spirits, capabilities, and backgrounds.
Therefore, we celebrate with them their arrival at the portal of true conscious
loving and are honoured to witness this joyous occasion in their lives.
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Introduction – Body 12
Real love in marriage is something beyond the warmth and glow, the excitement
and romance of being deeply in love. It is caring as much about the welfare
and happiness of your marriage partner as about your own. But real love is not
being totally absorbed in each other. It is looking outward in the same
direction, together. Love makes burdens lighter because you divide them, it
makes joys more intense because you share them. It makes you stronger so you
can reach out and become involved with life in ways you dared not risk alone.
The beautiful thing about love is that it’s an experience we share with the whole
of mankind throughout the world. And yet, to everyone who falls in love, it is
the most unique, precious thing in the world. A really happy marriage is
founded on love and friendship. There is nothing in life that love cannot change.
Love is, of its nature, unselfish, understanding and kind. True love, too, is a
commitment of heart and mind. There can be no stronger bond to ensure a
happy married life. There can be only one, it’s a kind of magic.
Introduction – Body 13
The wonderful thing about Bride and Grooms decision to marry is that they
didn’t have to in this day and age, which makes the decision all the more special
and meaningful. Marriage for Bride and Groom does not mean a loss of
individuality, rather it represents to them an expansion of support and
resources, so that individually they can better realise their own goals and
ambitions.
Though the opportunity was there for them to live together as a De facto
couple, they have chosen to take this step of marriage so as to say to the world
"We are together, we are a team and we have something very special we
would like to acknowledge".
Through their marriage Bride and Groom also feel they will find strength
through commitment that is borne of a true desire to face the world together
and to feel secure in the knowledge that each has made a commitment to the
other, and to enjoy the freedom which that decision brings.
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Introduction – Body 14
Bride and Groom today you affirm your love for the other, the one you have
laughed with and cried with, the one you have learned from and shared with,
the one you have chosen to support encourage and give yourself to, through all
the days given you to share. Today you affirm your lifelong commitment to
each other.
Every love story in its own way has certain greatness. There is often the untold
history of physical and mental hardship, the fear and agony of difficult decision
making, the shattering darkness of the great breaks in life's pattern, and then
almost unbelievably, the light at the end of the tunnel. True love, traditions tell
us, never runs smoothly, but there does come a time when the forces which have
sought to destroy it, admit defeat and disintegrate, and love triumphs.
This is a happy occasion when Bride and Groom stand before us to declare and
celebrate their love. Their path has not been easy, but they believe that what
has emerged was worth the hardship they have endured.
If we recognise that life at its deepest and most personal must be selfless and
loving to bring human happiness, then so it must be in the wider community. It is
to celebrate this marriage that we are now assembled and the happy memories
will remain with Bride and Groom from this time on.
Introduction – Body 15
This is the time and place chosen by Bride and Groom to allow us, their family
and friends to share the radiance of their love for one another. A love that is
solely experienced by Bride and Groom, as they prepare to exchange their
marriage vows.
These vows unite them in a relationship that is founded on love, trust, honesty
and mutual respect. And they are more than mere words; these vows are the
expression of an emotion that two individuals cherish between themselves. An
emotion that unites them as only they can fully understand.
There are no guarantees in a marriage. Marriage is a work of love. It calls for
two people to share their vision of life, with tolerance, patience, understanding
and love. It calls for two people to remain individual while building around
themselves a world that they call their own. A world which is full of their hopes,
their dreams of love and their happiness, a beautiful world of peace and
contentment in which they are equally strong as they support and love one
another through the inevitable challenges that life will present them with.
Marriage is not an easy commitment, but we can all be sure that Bride and
Groom have already built the foundations for such a wonderful relationship to
continue to grow, and to blossom, as the years strengthen their love and life
together. We, who are witnesses to this marriage between Bride and Groom,
sincerely wish them all happiness and prosperity in their lives together.
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Introduction – Body 16
We are gathered here, not to witness the beginning of what will be, but rather
what already is! We do not create this marriage, because we cannot. We can
and do, however, celebrate with Bride & Groom and their families, the
wondrous and joyful occurrence that has already taken place in their lives. So
let the celebration begin!
Introduction – Body 17
This marriage ceremony is a celebration of human destiny. It acknowledges that
this union will have, as one of its major commitments, the willingness of each
partner to search for, discover, and support one another as they commit to
maintain their individuality through their journey together.
Introduction – Body 18
Always speak the truth and listen attentively, so that you may understand each
other's thoughts and intentions. Inspire each other by sharing your
accomplishments. Say "I love you" often to retain the warmth between you.
Laugh a lot too, even when you're angry, and remember you are each other's
best friend.
Stand together and for each other always, be content in mind and spirit and
make each day a blessing and fulfilment of your dreams
Introduction – Body 19
Bride and Groom have chosen to marry today because they have something
very special they would like to acknowledge. They are delighted that they have
been so lucky to find that one person, in a world of many, that makes them
whole. They have discovered that their soul mate, that person that they are
going to spend the rest of their life together. They are ecstatic. They want to
share this happiness with the people they care the most about, their close friends
and family, so have asked us here so they can make public affirmation. .
Introduction - Body 20
This marriage ceremony is a celebration of human destiny. It acknowledges that
this union will have, as one of its major commitments, the willingness of each
partner to search for, discover and support one another as they commit to
maintain their individuality through their journey together.
From now on each partner will consider the other person's desires and needs
are equal, if not more important, to their own.
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Giving Away
Traditionally the bride will be “Given Away by her Father” but this role may be
performed by someone else if you wish. Example; Mother, Brother, Sister,
Children
Feel free to add, delete or mix examples to create your own Giving Away
Ceremony.
Minimum Requirement
Nil
Giving Away 1
When people discuss what really matters in life, they always conclude what
they really value is human relationships, their relationship with friends and
family. One of the longest and strongest relationships we have is that between
a Father and his Daughter. However, it is only on rare occasions that this
relationship is recognised and today is one of them.
Brides Father’s Name represents his family here today, but in a special gesture
he symbolises his own personal love for his daughter, Bride. So mindful of
these values I now ask him – Bride Father’s Name do you bring Bride to be
married to Groom?
Father: I do.
Giving Away 2
Who gives Bride to be married to Groom?
Giver: I do.
Giving Away 3
Traditionally, it was the custom for a young woman to be under the authority
and protection of the man of the house. When she married, the responsibility
passed to her husband. This was the origin of the "Giving away" ceremony.
Things have changed and so have women. But in keeping with tradition we still
ask, but more as a symbol of respect for Brides Father rather than the exchange
of a chattel. With this in mind, I now ask
Do you Bride’s Father give Bride to be married to Groom?
Bride’s Father:
I do.
Giving Away 4
Who brings Bride to be married to Groom?
Bringer: I do.
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July 2010 Page 17
Endorsement
The endorsement is an alternative to the Giving Away Ceremony or may be in
addition.
It offers the opportunity of more than one person being involved. It also avoids
the idea of someone being given away like a possession.
Feel free to add, delete or mix examples to create your own Endorsement
Ceremony.
Minimum Requirement
Nil
Endorsement 1
Parents
Bride & Groom are happy that their parents are here to witness this pledge of
their commitment to one another. They ask that their parents endorse this
marriage and that they help uphold the ideals Bride and Groom are expressing
today. So I now ask of the parents: (Insert their Names here) Do you offer
Bride and Groom your love and support for their future life together?
Parents: We Do
Endorsement 2
Group
Ladies and Gentlemen, Bride and Groom and requested that you all be
included in their circle of love by becoming involved in their ceremony; they
have requested that you give them to each other in marriage, that you all
collectively give them away. So mindful of this I now ask of you, friends and
families of Bride and Groom, please say “We do” if you bring Bride and
Groom to be married to each other.
Guests “We Do”
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July 2010 Page 18
THE ASKING
This is probably the most recognisable part of a Wedding Ceremony, although
it is not a compulsory component in Australia.
I have included traditional examples below but you may also like to give them
your own flavour and add a smile. By personalising the Asking Ceremony it
“pulls together” your guests, because they will recognise you in the ceremony.
Examples:
1. Bride and Groom, before you make your marriage vows, I must ask, do you
each promise to continue your love … of cheap red wine, eighties music and
spending the whole of Sunday in your Pyjamas?
Bride and Groom: We do.
2. Do you Bride promise that you will accept Groom’s obsession with his plasma
TV also promise to share your doona with him during the Sunday night movie?
Bride: I will
Do you Groom promise to wait patiently out side shoe shops while Bride tries on
six pairs of new shoes, knowing that she has 2 pairs in the wardrobe, that she
has never worn.
Groom: I will
You may include anything, but if it reflects you, particularly things about you
that other people will recognise it can be a great way of pulling all your guests
together and maybe even putting a smile on their face.
Minimum Requirement
Nil
Asking 1
Will you Groom/Bride take Groom/Bride to be your lawful
wife/husband/spouse.
Groom/Bride: I will
Asking 2
Will you Groom/Bride take Groom/Bride to be your lawful wife/husband, to
share your life with her/him, and do you pledge that you will love, honour and
care for her/him, with tenderness and affection, through all the varying
experiences of your life?
Groom/Bride: I will.
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Asking 3
Will you Groom/Bride take Groom/Bride to be your life long partner. Do you
promise that you will love, listen and learn from him/her every day so that you
may share your dreams and your future together forever.
Groom/Bride: I will.
Asking 4
Will you take Groom/Bride to be your wife/husband?, will you make the daily
effort to relate to her/him and listen to her/him.
Groom/Bride: I will.
Asking 5
Will you Groom/Bride take Groom/Bride to be your lawful wife/husband.
Will you love her/him, comfort her/him, honour and cherish her/him in times of
sickness and health and forsaking all others be true only to her/him as long as
you both shall live?
Groom/Bride: I will.
Asking 6
Groom and Bride, now that you are about to enter the magic and mysteries of
marriage, do you choose still and happily, in our midst, to make these promises
together?
Groom & Bride: together We Do.
Asking 7
Groom/Bride, Will you take Groom/Bride to be your wife/husband and your
lifelong partner. Will you constantly try to stay aware of your relationship
with her/him, striving to communicate with her/him, be sensitive to her/his needs,
wanting her/his success and happiness through all the years ahead?
Groom/Bride: I will.
Ph 0412 477 141
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July 2010 Page 20
THE VOWS
Your Vows are the heart of your Ceremony. This is when you make your
commitment to one another. You make a promise, in front of your witnesses,
which will last a life time. (Don’t mean to scare you)
This section you must actually speak the words your self (it’s the law). So you can
memorise your vows or you can repeat them after me, or a mix of bother.
Minimum Requirement
I call upon the persons present to witness that from today, I Names, take you,
Names to be my wife/husband/spouse
Vow 1
I call upon the persons present to witness that from today, I Names, take you,
Names to be my wife/husband/spouse
Vow 2
I call upon the persons present to witness that from today, Their Name, I choose
you to share my life as my wife/husband. I love you for yourself and will love
you through good fortune and adversity, while we both shall live.
Vow 3
I call upon the persons present to witness that from today, I Names, take you,
Names to be my wife/husband/spouseI, Name, take you, Name to be my
wife/husband, my lover and my friend, the one I will live with, laugh and dream
with. I promise to love you, cherish and respect you, throughout our lives
together.
Vow 4
I call upon the persons present to witness that from today I, Name, take you,
Name to be my wife/husband, to have and to hold from this day forward
through good times as well as bad and I promise to be true to you as long as
we both shall live.
Vow 5
I call upon the persons present to witness that from today Name I declare my
love for you. I take you as my wife/husband. I invite you to share your life with
me. I promise always to respect your needs and to accept you as you are. I
will be honest with you in thought word and deed. I truly love you.
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July 2010 Page 21
Vow 6
I call upon the persons present to witness that from today Name, I declare my
love for you, I NAME take you, NAME as my Husband/Wife/Spouse. I invite
you to share my life me. I promise to be kind, unselfish and trusting. I will
work for a happy life for both of us. This is my solemn vow.
Vow 7
I call upon the persons present to witness that from today I, Name, take you
Name as my Wife/Husband/Spouse. I give myself to you,. and I promise to
love and cherish you for all the days of my life.
Vow 8
I call upon the persons present to witness that from today I, Name, take you,
Name to be my wife/husband/spouse. Today I pledge my love to you, to be
given without restraint. I lay my life in your keeping and will do my utmost to
protect yours. I'll care for you though illness and rejoice in your health. My
wealth is yours to share, as are our burdens and our losses. Your every breath
is sacred to me and should death ever separate us, I vow my love shall be
undying.
Vow 9
I call upon the persons present to witness that from today I, Name, take you,
Name to be my wife/husband, and I agree to be your loving wife/husband.
Vow 10
I call upon the persons present to witness that from today I Name, take you,
Name to be my wife/husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for
better for worse, for richer for poorer, in times of happiness as well as
adversity, while we both shall live.
Vow 11
I call upon the persons present to witness that from today I Name, take you
Name as my wife/husband/spouse. I vow to love you no matter what happens
to you or us. I will share all the possessions that I own with you. I will be
supportive and loyal to you in every way possible; I will be faithful to you
forsaking all others; and I will be your ever present friend, your constant lover
and your lifelong spouse.
Vow 12
I call upon the persons present to witness that from today I, Name, take you,
Name to be my wife/husband/spouse. All that I am I give to you and all that I
have I share with you. Whatever the future holds I will love and stand by you
throughout our lives together. This is my solemn vow.
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July 2010 Page 22
Vow 13
I call upon the persons present to witness that from today Name, I now join my
life with you as I take you as my Husband/Wife/Spouse. A life to be lived with
love, honesty and trust, to communicate fully, to care for you and to share all I
can, so that we may grow together and as individuals. This is my promise for
our life together.
Vow 14
I call upon the persons present to witness that from today From this day I take
you, my darling, Name to be my wife/husband/spouse, to live with you and
laugh with you; to stand by your side and sleep in your arms; to be joy to your
heart and food to your soul; to bring out the best in you always; and, for you,
to be the most that I can. To laugh with you in the good times; to struggle with
you in the bad; to console you when you are downhearted; to wipe your tears
with my hands; to comfort you with my body; to mirror you with my soul; to
share with you all my riches and honours until we grow old.
Vow 15
I call upon the persons present to witness that from today I Name take you
Name to be by wife/husband/spouse, to love you and to cherish you. To help
you and to honour you, to give you understanding and comfort, in whatever the
future may bring, in confidence that together, we are responsible for our
destiny.
Vow 16
I call upon the persons present to witness that from today I Name take you
Name to be my husband/wife/spouse. To be no other than yourself. Loving
what I now of you, trusting what I do not yet know, with respect for your
integrity and faith in your love for me, through all the years and in all that life
may bring us, this is my pledge to you.
Vow 17
I call upon the persons present to witness that from today I, Name, take you,
Name to be my wife/husband/spouse and life partner.
To laugh with you in the good times; to struggle with you in the bad;
to solace you when you are downhearted; to wipe your tears with my hands;
to comfort you with my body; to mirror you with my soul;
to share with you all my riches and honours; beyond when we both grow old.
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July 2010 Page 23
RING CEREMONY
The exchange of rings may be prefaced by an introduction. It may simply be a
connection between the Vow and the exchange of rings or explain more about
the tradition or symbolism of rings.
Following the introduction, each the Bide and Groom, will make a statement as
they exchange/ receive their ring.
The classic example of this would be “With this ring I thee wed”
Minimum Requirement
Nil
Ring Introduction
Ring Introduction 1
Traditionally, the passage to the status of husband and wife is marked by the
exchange of rings. These rings are a symbol of the unbroken circle of love.
Love freely given has no beginning and no end. Love freely given has no giver
and no receiver – for each is the giver and each is the receiver of love. May
these rings remind you always of the vows you have taken here today.
Ring Introduction 2
The perfect circle of a ring symbolizes eternity. As you give these rings to each
other, our wish is that your love will be as eternal and everlasting as these rings.
In the years to come, they will remind you of the overwhelming joy of this
special occasion. May you always be as happy together as you are today.
Ring Introduction 3
As you exchange these rings today, they will become a practical reminder of
your vows. So use them. When you are dealing with one of life’s challenges may
the look or the touch of these rings remind you of the joy, happiness and love
you are sharing today.
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Ring Exchange 1
Groom/Bride, wear this ring, and the world will know that I am yours and you
are mine.
Ring Exchange 2
With this ring I thee wed and I make you a promise that from this day forward,
you shall not walk alone. My heart will be your shelter and my arms will be
your home.
Ring Exchange 3
Groom/Bride with this ring I give you my personal gift and my personal promise
of love, trust and pride that you are my wife/husband
Ring Exchange 4
With this ring, I thee wed, wear it with love and as a symbol of all we share.
Ring Exchange 5
Groom/Bride I place this ring on your finger, with the dream of a never-ending
love, just like the circle of this ring, wear it with love and faith as a reminder of
my love for you.
Ring Exchange 6
With this ring, I give you my heart and my love, and my promise, of love, trust
and pride that you are my husband/wife.
Ring Exchange 7 – One ring only
Bride/Groom: I place this ring on your finger, wear it as our symbol of eternal
love and all we share
Bride/Groom, I thank you for this beautiful ring I accept it as a symbol that we
are one with each other. This ring will remind me of you and I will wear it with
love all my life
Ring Exchange 8
Bride/ Groom: With this ring, I give you my heart, my love and my credit card, and
my promise, of love, trust and pride that you are my wife/ husband.
Bride/ Groom: With this ring, I give you my heart, my love and I accept your credit
card, and my promise, of love, trust and pride that you are my wife/husband.
Ph 0412 477 141
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July 2010 Page 25
Poetry and Readings
I Treasure Your Friendship
by Larry S. Chengges
There is no greater treasure
than an understanding friend
who's there in times of trouble
and on whom we can depend.
A friend who knows our every mood
and brightens cloudy days,
one who's slow to criticise,
but quick to offer praise.
One who shares our happy times
and gives them added worth,
who adds a touch of heaven
to all our days on earth.
There is no greater treasure
than a friend who always cares,
one who will always remember us
every day throughout the year.
Friendship
By Judy Bielicki
It is often said that it is love that makes the world go round.
However without doubt, it is friendship that keeps our spinning existence on an even
keel.
True friendship provides so many of the essentials for a happy life - it is the strong
foundation on which to build an enduring relationship, it is the mortar which bonds us
together in harmony, and it is the calm, warm protection we sometimes need when the
world outside seems cold and chaotic.
True friendship hold a mirror to our foibles and failings, without destroying our sense
of worthiness.
True friendship nurtures our hopes, supports us in our disappointments, and encourages
us to grow to our best potential.
(Name and Name) come together as friends. Today, they pledge to each other their
love, but also the strength, warmth and, most importantly, the fun of true friendship.
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July 2010 Page 26
To My very Good Friend
By Laura Medley
We have all had many friends
throughout our lives,
but only a few of those friends
we would call good friends,
That's because being a good friend
involves time and understanding and love, which can be difficult to share with another.
When I think of my good friends,
I always think about you,
because that is what you have been to me.
You have taken the time
to be there when I needed you,
and you have listened to me
when my life was changing.
You have always cared enough
to try to understand my feelings
and help me to understand myself.
And, most important,
your consideration and honesty
have shown me
that your friendship is true…
symbolising a very special kind of love
that only a few friends
ever share with one another.
Thank you for being such
a good friend to me,
and for all the joys we have known together.
To Keep Your Marriage Brimming
By Ogden Nash
To keep your marriage brimming
with love in the loving cup,
Whenever you're wrong admit it;
Whenever you're right shut up.
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July 2010 Page 27
I CARRY YOUR HEART WITH ME
(I carry it in my heart)
By E.E.Cummings
I carry your heart with me
(I carry it in my heart)
I am never without it
(anywhere I go you go, my dear;
and whatever is done by only me is your doing, my darling I fear no fate, my sweet) I
want no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true) and it's you are whatever a
moon has always meant and whatever a sun will always sing is you here is the deepest
secret nobody knows (here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud and the sky
of the sky of a tree called life; which grows higher than soul can hope or mind can
hide) and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart I carry your heart (I carry it
in my heart)
Everyone Needs Someone
By Helen Steiner Rice.
People need people and friends need friends
And all need love for a full life depends
Not on vast riches or great acclaim
Not on success or on worldly fame,
But just in knowing that someone cares,
And holds us close in their thoughts and prayers.
For only the knowledge that we're understood,
Makes everyday living feel wonderfully good,
And we rob ourselves of life's greatest need
When we "lock up our hearts and fail to heed"
The outstretched hand reaching to find,
A kindred spirit whose heart and mind
Are lonely and longing to somehow share
Out joys and sorrows and to make us aware
That life's completeness and richness depends
On the things we share with our loved ones and friends.3
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July 2010 Page 28
Love
By Rod Mckuen
Love
Love, puts the music in laughter,
the beauty in song,
the warmth in a shoulder,
the gentle in strong.
Love puts the magic in memories,
the sunshine in skies,
the gladness in giving,
the starlight in eyes.
Love puts the fun in together,
the sad in apart,
the hope in tomorrow,
the joy in the heart.
Give Yourself
By Unknown
Give yourself to one another completely.
Be generous in your giving and make no conditions for these gifts.
Love one another constantly and fully.
Be humble in your acceptance of your partner's love.
Be honest with each other.
Be thankful for each other's love and strive to develop its richness day by day.
Respect each other in every way.
Be patient with each other's weaknesses and accept each other for what you are, not
what you wish one another to be.
Communicate constantly with one another.
Be calm, patient, tolerant and reasonable in your communication.
Be capable of good listening.
Share with one another misfortune and fortune alike.
Be compassionate and express your love for one another constantly.
Know your limitation and be honest with yourself as you are with one another.
Fuse your souls into one another and be happy for the love you have been so
fortunate to find in one another.
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July 2010 Page 29
What is Real
An excerpt from the book “The Velveteen Rabbit”, by Margery Williams:
“What is ‘real’?” asked the rabbit one day,
“Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?”
“’Real isn’t how you are made,” said the skin horse.
“It’s a thing that happens to you. When a person loves you for a long, long time, not
just to play with, but really loves you, then you become real.”
“Does it hurt?” asked the rabbit.
“Sometimes,” said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. “When you are real you
don’t mind being hurt.”
“Does it happen all at once, like being wound up,” he asked, “or bit by bit?”
“It doesn’t happen all at once”, said the Skin Horse.
“You become. It takes a long time. That’s why it doesn’t often happen to people who
break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by
the time you are real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out
and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all,
because once you are real you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand
The Greatest Prize Already Won
Today is our day of celebration,
As today we're off and running,
Life is a journey; a fast-paced race,
The corks are popped and the champagne bubbling.
Run with me along the grassy mile,
I promise you a life of fun,
Whatever we do we'll have the best of times,
Until the race is won.
Life with you is a sure-way bet,
Unbridled, unfettered and free,
We journey as each other's favourite,
There is no other for me.
Life races by at a frenetic pace,
To the sound of a thundering roar,
But the wonderful opportunities of life
Are the tracks we are yet to explore.
There are many barriers and hurdles,
To jump along the way,
But we'll face the challenges head-on together,
And from our track we'll never stray.
I promise you an exciting ride,
A walk, a run; oft times a hop,
Ever special, always fun,
As long as I'm on top!
There'll be many moments to capture,
Celebrations in the sun,
Our happiness a photo finish,
The greatest prize already won.
The Art of Marriage
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July 2010 Page 30
A good marriage must be created.
In the art of marriage the little
things are the big things.
It is never being too old to hold hands.
It is remembering to say "I love you" at least once a day.
It is never going to sleep angry.
It is at no time taking the other for granted;
the courtship should not end with the honeymoon,
it should continue through all the years.
It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives.
It is standing together facing the world.
It is forming a circle of love that gathers in the whole family.
It is doing things for each other, not in the attitude
of duty or sacrifice, but in the spirit of joy.
It is speaking words of appreciation and demonstrating
gratitude in thoughtful ways.
It is not expecting the husband to wear a halo
or the wife to have wings of an angel.
It is not looking for perfection in each other.
It is cultivating flexibility, patience, understanding and a
sense of humor.
It is having the capacity to forgive and forget.
It is giving each other an atmosphere in
which each can grow.
It is finding room for the things of the spirit.
It is a common search for the good andthe beautiful.
It is establishing a relationship in which the independence is equal, dependence is
mutual and
the obligation is reciprocal.
It is not only marrying the right partner,
it is being the right partner.
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July 2010 Page 31
The Matrimonial Stakes
by A.B. "Banjo" Paterson
I wooed her with a steeplechase, I won her with a fall,
I made her heartstrings quiver on the flat
When the pony missed his take-off, and we crashed into the wall;
Well, she simply had to have me after that!
It awoke a thrill of interest when they pulled me out for dead
From beneath the shattered ruins of a horse;
And although she looked indifferent when I landed -- on my head -In the water, it appealed to her, of course!
When I won the Flappers' Flatrace it was "all Sir Garneo",
For she praised the way I made my final run.
And she thought the riding won it -- for how could the poor girl know
That a monkey could have ridden it and won!
Then they "weighed me in" a winner -- it's not often that occurs!
So I didn't let my golden chances slip,
For I showed her all the blood-marks where I jabbed him with the spurs,
And the whip-strokes where I hit him with the whip.
Then I asked her if she loved me, and she seemed inclined to shirk
For a moment, so I took her by the head
(So to speak) and rushed her at it; and she seemed to like the work
When she kissed me, though she blushed a rosy red.
She's a mouth as soft as velvet, and she plenty has of heart,
I could worship every little step she takes;
And the saddle-bell is ringing, so we're going to the start,
Certain winners for the Matrimonial Stakes!
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July 2010 Page 32
‘The Nicest Feeling’
by Barin Taylor
The Nicest Feeling I’ve Known Is Being In Love With You!
For bringing me happiness
as though it were a gift
I could open every day
….. I thank you.
For listening to the words
I want to say
….. I appreciate you.
For letting me share the most
personal parts of your world,
and for welcoming me with
your eyes
….. I am grateful to you.
For being the wonderful, kind,
giving person you are
….. I admire you.
For being the most beautiful
light in my life
….. I desire you.
For being everything you are to me,
and for doing it so beautifully
….. I love you.
The Secret of a Beautiful Marriage
If you can love each other
Through the sunshine and the storm,
And keep the flame of true devotion
Glowing bright and warm;
If you can give each other room
To grow and change and learn,
Yet still hold one another close
In mutual concern;
If you can be both lovers
And the very best of friends,
And face together, hand in hand,
The challenges life sends….
If you can offer patience, comfort,
And real understanding,
Encourage one another’s efforts,
Yet be undemanding;
If you can show true love and faith
In everything you do,
Then married love will surely hold
Much joy for both of you.
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July 2010 Page 33
Union Garden
by Christine Byrnes
Today this Two become as One,
New life in a garden has begun
Garden of Life – this union akin
The Union Garden shall begin
All it took was just one small seed,
Then friendship grew a further need.
So love between these two it grew
And now these words I give to you:
A great garden needs effort & time,
Tender it always, rain and sunshine.
A new garden is fresh and bare
The earth is soft, so tread with care.
Take pleasure in all the new growth,
That’s comes within & before you both.
Feed it with kindness, patience, and trust
Shower with praise, laughter and lust.
Each living thing needs room to grow,
So don’t overcrowd whenever you sow.
For the oak grows - not in the shade
Neither the gum, willow, nor jade.
The seasons they come, and they go
Give each space: to blossom and grow.
May your roots grow deep in the soil.
Savour the fruits of all your toil
With scent of jasmine and the rose
The lemon thyme between your toes
Breath-in the sweet scent of the flowers
Love intoxicates - with perfume powers.
An untended garden may wither & die
So give of your self - all that you try.
Don’t be afraid to dig in the earth
Let not the weeds take centre, nor girth.
Be the evergreen - remain bold & true
Sparkle and shine like the morning dew;
This Union is the elixir of life,
Today the joining of man and wife.
Take time to share, to have and to hold
From this day forward, may it unfold
And so this Union is like a garden,
May it be strong, majestic, and everlasting
No longer they’re the wind blown seed,
Now, go and walk the grounds with thee.
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July 2010 Page 34
The Prophet
By Kahlil Gibran
Love one another,
But make not a bond of love,
Let it rather be a moving sea
Between the Shores of your souls
Fill each other’s cup
But drink not from the same cup
Sing and dance together and be joyous,
But let each one of you be alone
Though they quiver with the same music
Give your hearts,
But not into each other’s keeping
For only the hand of life
Can contain your hearts
And stand together
Yet not too near together
For the pillars of the temple stand apart
And the oak tree and the cypress
Grow not in each other’s shadow
I Love You – Means Forever
"I love you,” means that I accept you for the person you are,
and that I don't wish to change you into someone else.
It means that I do not expect perfection from you,
just as you don't expect it from me......
"I love you" means that I will love you and stand by you
even through the worst of times.
It means loving you when you're in a bad mood
or too tired to do the things I want to do.
It means loving you when you're down,
not just when you're fun to be with.
"I love you" means that I know your deepest secrets
and do not judge you for them, asking in return
only that you do not judge me for mine.
It means that I care enough to fight for what we have
and that I love enough not to let go.
It means thinking of you, dreaming of you,
wanting and needing you constantly,
and hoping you feel the same way for me.
"I love you".....means forever.
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The Thoughts of Nanushka
May your friendship and trust endure and strengthen
through the winter of your lives and may your love be renewed as surely as the blossoms
adorn the trees each spring may your understanding of each other grow with your love
until the wonder of each night and day
becomes a lifetime of happiness together –
I love you so many ways
In so many ways....I love you.
You may never think about
what a special person you are,
or all the many ways you're loved,
but I know how I feel
when I think about you,
when I look at you,
and when I hold you.
I always want you near me,
with the happiness we find together in love.....
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Today
Adapted from Bertrand Russell
Today you marry your best friend
the one you have laughed with and cried with
the one you have learned from and shared with
the one you have chosen to support, encourage and give yourself to
through all the days given you to share
Today you marry the one you love
My Love
It means so much to have you
as the source of my laughter and smiles,
as the person with whom to share
my little secrets and big dreams,
my fondest memories
and most important plans.
Every day,
remember that I love you.
In my eyes, in my mind,
and in my heart,
you are like no other,
and there will always be
a special place in my life just for you.
To My Wife
By Brian Zouch
Upon this day I pledge my all
to you and only you
And never shall love’s blossom fall
through any act I do
My love for you is pure and strong
my eye for you alone
I take your hand and guide you on
in each our hearts a home
This boundless love I have for you
I give in charge this day
That you shall know, all other too,
‘tis not a game I play
From this day on, we wedded live
two lives to be as one
This gift of love to you I give
To never be undone
So Journey on life’s road with me
and say for all to know
Our love is deeper than the sea
and yet has much to grow
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This Day
by Brian Zouch
This day you shall remember well
As in your married love you dwell
And cast your minds back to the time
You made each other's hearts entwine.
In wedded love you choose to be
Each binding each and yet each free
As days and months and years go on
Your love will hold you firm and strong
The marriage vow this day you say
A vow you'll build on day by day
And as you walk the path of life
The world will know you're man and wife
You two who now are but one soul
Have each to play a different role
For in this life you each shall care
That all you do is all times fair
You pledge this day to be as one
In all those wondrous years to come.
Evermore
Today as you make your marriage vows
and all your dreams come true.
May the happiness that love endows
Forever be with you.
If a problem arises, as well it may
Let patience be your guide
Within your hearts do not dismay
As love is true and tried.
Throughout the years that lie ahead
as the wings of life unfold
The loving words each have said
On a scroll of gold are told.
For as you open love's hallowed door
and you join as man and wife
May your love be strong for evermore
To last throughout your life
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Marriage
If two are caring, as they're sharing life's hopes and fears
If the music of laughter outweighs sadness of tears
Marriage is togetherness.
If both derive pleasure from mere presence of each other
Yet when parted no jealousies restrict, worry or smother
Marriage is freedom.
If achievements mean more when they benefit two
And consideration is shown with each point of view
Marriage is respect.
And if togetherness, freedom and respect are combined
With a joy that words can never fully define
then Marriage is Love.
The Gift of Love.
The devotion a man and a woman may feel each for the other
Is the great and eternal mystery of this world of ours.
We see it always, know joy beyond measure in its finding
Find fulfilment and happiness in its sharing
We need not understand only acknowledge and cherish its existence.
Life has the capacity to bring great sorrow as well as great happiness
But no matter what the adversity
Its pain will yield to the acknowledgment of love
And the acceptance of life
So keep open your hearts, be true to your souls.
You will remember always that the greatest gift of all is love
Given and received without reservation
With humility and gratitude
It forms of itself a buttress, a haven,
A strength that never wanes or weakens,
but grows more wonderful, more unconquerable
Day by Day
And enables life to become
An exciting and satisfying experience
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Forever Friendship
Sometimes in life, you find a special person,
Someone who changes your life by being a part of it.
Someone who convinces you
that there is an unlocked door,
just waiting for you to open it.
This is forever friendship.
When you're down, and the world seems dark and empty,
Your forever friend lifts you up in spirit, and makes that
dark and empty world - Suddenly seem bright and full.
Your forever friend gets you through the hard times,
the sad times and the confused times.
If you turn and walk away, your forever friend follows,
If you lose your way, your forever friend guides
you and cheers you on.
Your forever friend holds your hand and tells you that everything is going to be okay.
And when you find such a friend, you feel happy and complete, because you need not
worry.
You have a forever friend for life, and Forever, has no end.
This is why I love you
For the kindness in your eyes
and the warmth in your voice
for the honesty of your words
and the silence in your smile
for the ways in which we're similar
and those in which we're worlds apart
I love you
for the openness of your understanding
and the acceptance of your heart
for the tenderness of your touch
and the strength of your commitment
for your sense of humour
and your seriousness of purpose
for a thousand small reasons
and one most important of all simply because you are you.
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I Promise
I promise to give you all my love for now and forever,
to keep your love close
so that we will never grow apart.
I promise to confide in you if I feel insecure.
I promise to look back on the good and bad times with a smile,
to learn by each mistake and know that with every step of success,
we will make it, if we just try.
I promise to offer you all the happiness
I am capable of giving you,
to see that the future is ours,
to make the very best of.
I promise to set time aside to be best friends,
to dream dreams and make them reality,
and just to say...."I love you"....
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Always
I will always accept the way you are,
I fell in love with you for the qualities,
abilities and the outlook on life that you have,
and I won't try to reshape you in a different image.
I will always respect you,
as a person with your own interests,
desires and needs, and to realise
that those are sometimes different....
...but no less important than my own.
I will always share with you,
my time, my close attention,
and to bring joy and strength and
imagination to our relationship.
I will always pledge to keep myself open to you,
to let you see through the window of my personal world,
into my innermost fears and feelings,
secrets and dreams.
I will always promise to grow along with you,
and to be willing to face change
as we both change in order to keep our
relationship alive and exciting.
I will always love you in good times and in bad,
with all I feel inside.....
in the only way I know how,
completely and forever.
The Newly Wedded
By Winthrop Mackworth Praed
Now the rite is duly done,
Now the word is spoken,
And the spell has made us one
and never can be broken:
Rest we, dearest, in our home,
Roam we over the heather,
We shall rest, and we shall roam,
Shall we not? together.
From this hour the summer rose
Sweeter breaths to charm us;
From this hour the winter snows
Lighter fall to harm us:
Fair or foul -- on land or sea -Come the wind or weather,
Best or worst, whatever they be,
We shall share together.
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Apache Wedding Prayer
translator unknown
Now you will feel no rain,
for each of you will be a shelter to the other
Now you will feel no cold,
for each of you will be warmth to the other,
Now there is no loneliness;
For each will be companion to the other.
Now you are two persons,
but there is only one life before you.
and in your dwelling place,
enter into your days together,
And may your days be good
and long on the earth.
Destiny (From the American Wedding Album)
Let this be our destiny…
to love, to live,
to begin each new day together,
to share our lives forever.
Benediction of the American Indians
Now you will feel no rain, for each of you will be shelter for the other.
Now you will feel no cold, for each of you will be warmth to the other.
Now you will not be lonely for each of you will be companion to the other.
Now you are two persons, but there are three lives before you:
his life, her life and your life together.
Go now to your dwelling place, to enter into the days of your life together. May
beauty surround you both in the journey ahead
and through all the years
May happiness be your companion
to the place where the river meets the sun,
And may your days together be good and long upon this earth.
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Our Relationship
Some people believe that with time
relationships become less interesting
less exciting and less fun.
But our relationship with time
has become more interesting
more exciting and more fun.
Some people believe
that with time the best aspects of a relationship end.
But with time our relationship
has become better and better
and our love has become stronger and stronger....
Our relationship is the most important
part of my life and I will always strive to keep it this way.
I believe so much in you and in us and
I love you very much.
Love
By McKuen
Love,
Puts the music in laughter
the beauty in song
the warmth in a shoulder
the gentle in strong
Love,
Puts the magic in memories
the sunshine in skies
the gladness in giving
the starlight in eyes
Love,
Puts the fun in together
the sadness in apart
the hope in tommorrow
the joy in the heart
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I Was Born to Speak Your Name
By Tom Clark
I knew the tune
It was my song
Even before you came along
Yet only then did I perceive its meaning
This “you” wished for
This desired Other of whom
I spoke so glowingly in poems
I never knew its name
When I lifted its arms up
I noticed tiny wings
That's all I knew
The rest was dreamlike
Anonymous this "you"
So I guess those poems
Were like phone calls to the future
I think I had your number
Knew what I was looking for
Even before I found it
In the “face” directory
And luckiest of all
Your human substance
Was life's loveliest
Far as I could see
As if I'd placed
Bones and skin
Together in a dream
You were put together that way
Look to This Day
From Sanskrit
Look to this day!
For it is life,
The very life of life ...
For yesterday is only a dream,
And tomorrow is only a vision
But today, well lived,
Makes every yesterday a dream of happiness,
And every tomorrow a vision of hope!
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The Greatest of These is Love
Adaptation of the first letter of Paul to the ‘Corinthians
Be ambitious for the higher gifts and I am going to show you a way that is better than
any of them. If I have all the eloquence of men or of angels, but speak without love, I
am simply a gong booming or a symbol clashing.
If I have the gift of prophecy, understanding all the mysteries there are, knowing
everything, but am without love, then I am nothing at all.
If I give away all that I possess, piece by piece, and if I even let them take my body to
burn it, but am without love, it will do me no good whatever. Love is always patient
and kind; it is never jealous; it is never boastful or conceited; it is never rude or selfish;
it does not take offence and is not resentful.
Love takes no pleasure in other people’s sins but delights in the truth;
It is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope, and to endure whatever comes.
True love does not come to an end.
On Friendship by Roy Croft
I love you, not for what you are, but what I am, when I am with you.
I love you not only for what you have made of yourself, but what you
are making of me. I love you for the part of me that you bring out.
I love you for putting your hand into my heart and passing
over all the weak things that you cannot help seeing there,
and drawing out into the light all the beautiful and radiant things
that no one else has looked quite far enough to find.
I love you for ignoring the possibilities of the fool in me,
and for laying hold of the possibilities of good in me.
I love you for closing your eyes to the discords in me, and adding
to the music in me by worshipful listening...
You have done it without a touch, without a sign.
You have done it by being yourself.
"True Love"
True love is a sacred flame
that burns eternally
and none can dim its special glow
or change its destiny
True love speaks in tender tones
and hears with gentle ear
True love gives with open heart
and true love conquers fear
True love makes no harsh demands
it neither rules nor binds
and true love holds with gentle hands
the hearts that it entwines
adaption of Aristohenes’ speech to Plato at the Symposium.
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Whenever a lover has the good fortune to encounter his own actual other half,
affection, kinship and love combine together in them, an emotion which is quite
overwhelming, and such a pair practically refuses ever to be separated, even for a
moment. It is people like these who form lifelong partnerships, and it is more than
mere physical enjoyment, which causes them to take such intense delight in the
company of each other. If we are to praise the God who confers this benefit upon us,
then it is to Love that our praises should be addressed. It is Love who is the author of
our wellbeing in this life, by leading us towards what is akin to us. And it is love who
gives us the sure hope that if we conduct ourselves well in the sight of heaven, we will
hereafter be blessed and happy.
Happiness
Happiness is not something that just happens. A good marriage must be created.
In the art of marriage, the little things are the big things.
It is: never being too old to hold hands;
It is remembering to say, “I love you”, at least once a day.
It is never going to sleep angry.
It is at no time taking the other for granted but making the courtship continue
through all the years.
It is doing things for each other, not out of duty or sacrifice, but in the spirit of joy.
It is demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways.
It is not expecting the husband to wear the halo,
or the wife to have the wings of an angel.
It is not looking for perfection but cultivating flexibility, patience, understanding
and a sense of humour.
It is having the capacity to forgive and forget.
It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow.
That is the art of marriage.
Marriage is a Promise of Love
Marriage is a commitment to life...to the best that two people can find and bring out
of each other. It offers opportunities for sharing and growth no other human
relationship can equal, a physical and emotional joining that is promised for a lifetime.
Within the circle of its love, marriage encompasses all of life's most important
relationships. A wife and a husband are each other’s best friend, confidant, lover,
teacher, listener, and critic.
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There may be times when one partner is heartbroken or ailing, and the love of the
other may resemble the tender caring of a parent for a child.
Marriage deepens and enriches every facet of life. Happiness is fuller, memories are
fresher, commitments are stronger, even is felt more strongly, and passes away more
quickly. Marriage understands and forgives the mistakes life is unable to avoid. It
encourages and nurtures new life, new experiences, and new ways of expressing love
through the seasons of life.
When two people pledge to love and care for each other in marriage, they create a
spirit unique to themselves, which binds them closer than any spoken or written words.
Marriage is a promise, a potential, made in the hearts of two people who love, which
takes a lifetime to fulfil.
When You Love Someone
By Anne Murrow
When you love someone, you do not love them all the time in exactly the same way,
from moment to moment. It is an impossibility and yet this is exactly what most of us
demand.
Some people have so little faith in the ebb and flow of life, of love, of relationships.
They leap at the flow of the tide and resist in terror its ebb, as though afraid it will
never return. They insist on permanency, on duration, on continuity; when the only
continuity possible, in life as in love, is in growth, in fluidity - in freedom, in the sense
that the dancers are free, barely touching as they pass, but partners in the same
pattern.
The only real security is not in owning or possessing, not in demanding or expecting,
not in hoping, even. Security in a relationship lies neither in looking back to what was in
nostalgia, nor forward to what it might be in dread or anticipation, but living in the
present relationship and accepting it as it is now. Relationships must be like islands, one
must accept them for what they are here and now, within their limits - islands
surrounded and interrupted by the sea, and continually visited and abandoned by the
tides.
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Quotes
An adaption made up from quotes by Helen Keller and Joseph Addisson
A happy marriage has in it all the pleasures of friendship
All the enjoyment’s of sense and reason and indeed,
all the sweets of life, and the most important of all, Love.
It’s like a beautiful flower, which I may not touch
but whose fragrance makes the garden
a place of delight just the same.
A Blessing
Every day you both live, learn how to love.
Take time with each other Restore each other’s soul with loving words.
Receive love with as much understanding as you give it.
Find that which is within yourself.
Then you can share it with each other.
Do not fear this love and do not fear this marriage
But keep open heart and sincere minds.
Be sincerely interested in each other’s happiness.
Be constant and consistent in your love.
From this, as you know, comes security & strength
Untitled Poem by Michael Leunig, from You and Me, 1995
Once there was a damsel in distress.
She had become a bit of a dragon and it was consuming her.
A knight in shining armour confronted the damsel,
And seeing her reflection in his shiny breastplate,
she realised what a dragon she had become
and she didn’t like it.
In earnest she set about getting the dragon where it belonged and making sense of it.
“You have saved me”, she cried
“Take off your armour that I may kiss you in gratitude”.
“The removal of armour requires assistance”, responded the knight.
So, together they removed the heavy armour and the damsel embraced him warmly.
The knight had never been so warmly touched.
He felt immense relief. He felt lighter; less weary; more free.
“That’s how I feel too!” cried the damsel joyfully,
and after some healthy, passionate kisses
they had some healthy, passionate children.
They kept the dragon and the armour, which were useful from time to time;
and generally speaking, in their own funny way, they lived quite happily ever after.
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The Prayer
St. Francis of Assisi 1182-1226
Lord, make us instruments of your peace.
Where there is hatred, let us sow love;
Where there is injury, pardon;
Where there is discord, union;
Where there is doubt, faith;
Where there is despair, hope;
Where there is darkness, light;
Where there is sadness, joy;
O Divine Master, Grant that we may not so much seek
To be consoled as to console,
To be understood as to understand,
To be loved as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive;
It is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
And it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.
Amen
Blessing For A Marriage
James Dillet Freeman
May you always need one another, not so much to fill the emptiness as to help each
other know your fullness. May you want one another, but not out of lack. May you
embrace one another, but not encircle one another. May you succeed in all important
ways with each other, and not fail in the little graces. May you have happiness, and
may you find it in making one another happy. If you have quarrels that push you
apart, may both of you hope to have good sense enough to take the first step back.
May you have love, and may you find it in loving one another.
Marriage Advice Jane Wells 1886
Let your love be stronger than your hate or anger.
Learn the wisdom of compromise, for it is better to bend a little than to break.
Believe the best rather than the worst.
People have a way of living up or down to your opinion of them.
Remember that true friendship is the basis for any lasting relationship.
The person you choose to marry is deserving of the courtesies
and kindnesses you bestow on your friends.
Please hand this down to your children and your children's children.
Never Marry But For Love William Penn 1644-1718
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Never marry but for love; but see that thou lovest what is lovely. He that minds a body
and not a soul has not the better part of that relationship, and will consequently lack
the noblest comfort of a married life.
Between a man and his wife nothing ought to rule but love. As love ought to bring them
together, so it is the best way to keep them well together.
A husband and wife that love one another show their children that they should do so
too. Others visibly lose their authority in their families by their contempt of one
another, and teach their children to be unnatural by their own examples.
Let not enjoyment lessen, but augment, affection; it being the basest of passions to like
when we have not, what we slight when we possess.
Here it is we ought to search out our pleasure, where the field is large and full of
variety, and of an enduring nature; sickness, poverty or disgrace being not able to
shake it because it is not under the moving influences of worldly contingencies.
Nothing can be more entire and without reserve; nothing more zealous, affectionate
and sincere; nothing more contented than such a couple, nor greater temporal felicity
than to be one of them.
Marriage Is A Commitment To Life Source Unknown
Marriage is a commitment to life, the best that two people can find and bring out in
each other. It offers opportunities for sharing and growth that no other relationship can
equal. It is a physical and an emotional joining that is promised for a lifetime. Within
the circle of its love, marriage encompasses all of life's most important relationships. A
wife and a husband are each other's best friend, confidant, lover, teacher, listener,
and critic. And there may come times when one partner is heartbroken or ailing, and
the love of the other may resemble the tender caring of a parent for a child.
Marriage deepens and enriches every facet of life. Happiness is fuller, memories are
fresher, commitment is stronger, even anger is felt more strongly, and passes away
more quickly. Marriage understands and forgives the mistakes life is unable to avoid.
It encourages and nurtures new life, new experiences, and new ways of expressing a
love that is deeper than life.
When two people pledge their love and care for each other in marriage, they create
a spirit unique unto themselves which binds them closer than any spoken or written
words. Marriage is a promise, a potential made in the hearts of two people who love
each other and takes a lifetime to fulfil.
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Fulfilment
I have opened unto you the gates of my being and, like a tide, you have flown into
me.
The innermost recesses of my spirit are full of you and all the channels of my soul are
grown sweet with your presence.
For you have brought me peace.
The peace of tranquil waters and the quiet of the summer sea.
Your hands are filled with peace as the noon-tide is filled with light.
About your head is bound the eternal quiet of the stars
and in your heart dwells the calm miracle of twilight.
I am utterly content.
In all my being is no ripple of unrest
For I have opened unto you the wide gates of my being.
And like a tide you have flowed into me.
"Once in a Lifetime"
When I met you, I had no idea
how much my life was about to be changed ...
but then, how could I have known?
A love like ours happens once in a lifetime.
You were a miracle to me,
the one who was everything I had ever dreamed of,
the one I thought existed only in my imagination.
And when you came into my life,
I realised that what I had always thought was happiness
couldn’t compare to the joy that loving you brought to me.
You are a part of everything I think, do and feel,
and with you by my side,
I believe that anything is possible.
Thank you for the miracle of you ...
You are, and always will be,
the love of my life.
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On “LOVE”
Real love in marriage is something beyond the warmth and glow, the excitement and
romance of being deeply in love. It is caring as much about the welfare and
happiness of your marriage as about your own. But real love is not being totally
absorbed in each other. It is looking outward in the same direction, together. Love
makes burdens lighter because you divide them, it makes joys more intense because
you share them. It makes you stronger so you can reach out and become involved with
life in ways you dared not risk alone.
The beautiful thing about love is that it’s an experience we share with the whole of
mankind throughout the world. And yet, to everyone who falls in love, it is the most
unique, precious thing in the world. A really happy marriage is founded on love.
Love works in ways that are wondrous and strange.
There is nothing in life that love cannot change.
Love is unselfish, understanding and kind;
Love sees with the heart and not so much with the mind.
There can be no stronger bond between husband and wife
To ensure and secure a happy married life.
Harmonious wedded life is a precious gain to both man and woman, because, as we
said before, joys are increased and sorrows diminished by being shared. Marriage
increases the scope of responsibility, but it also adds the dimension of love to life,
giving it new meaning and new purpose.
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TOGETHER
By Peter F. Brown
Someday, when we're old and leathery,
Perhaps when we're two hundred and five,
Or more antique than that,
We'll move to spirit world
And take up residence.
There will be a white stone castle
On a seaside cliff
That rises from a moor.
Facing toward the west,
And each day's painting of the sun,
It will beckon us to walk through rooms
Filled with sunlight.
We will live there, with our children
And our children's loved ones,
A clan that lives to love others
And bring them to our castle
Of warmth and heart and love.
Art and music and growing things
Will fill the rooms,
Expressing how much we value
The chance to give and serve and love.
Our castle is waiting for us,
To live in its walls and dance with the world.
It will never change.
Its walls will never crumble.
My love for you is stronger than our castle.
If, on the way to the spirit world,
You found that your home was to be
A darkened hole of regretful muck,
But mine (through a clerical error)
Was still the castle,
You need not worry.
I would live with you in ooze,
Cleaning our swamp together,
Until our castle welcomed us
And watched us dance with the world.
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5 short Versicles:
1) Today I marry my friend;
The one I have laughed with and cried with;
The one I have learned from and shared with;
The one I have chosen to support, encourage and give myself to,
through all the days given us to share,
Today I marry the one I love.
2) You are my friends - my family
and all the lovers I have known You are my wisdom and my warmth,
the ecstasy in every high my heart has ever flown My pupil, my teacher, my eagle and my dove You are the music and the words to every song my soul has heard You are my love
3) Our love is strengthened by knowing
that each of us could survive
on our own
If we wanted to ...
but realising that more than anything
We choose to be together
4) Only once in a lifetime love rushes in
Changing you with the tide
And dawn’s ribbon of light bursts through the dark
Awakening you inside.
I thought it was all untrue
Until there all at once I knew....
When I saw you.
5) I want to love you without clutching
appreciate you without judging
join you without invading
invite you without demanding
Leave you without guilt
criticise you without blaming
and help you without insulting
If I can have the same from you
then we can truly meet and enrich each other.
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By SIR HUGH WALPOLE
The most wonderful of all things in life is the discovery of another
human being with whom one's relationship has a growing depth,
beauty and joy as the years increase. This inner progressiveness of
love between two human beings is a most marvellous thing; it cannot
be found by looking for it or by passionately wishing for it. It is
a sort of divine accident, and the most wonderful of all things in
life.
By TERRI MCPHERSON
Our life together had been built on mutual choices. We had chosen
each other as partners, chosen to love, to trust, and to create joy
together. The universe may very well have had a hand in bringing us
together; what we did beyond that point was of our own choosing.
That tiny flash of time left me forever changed. I realised that
somewhere among the pages of our history, rich in passages of shared
memories, we had chosen to become soul mates.
Kahlil Gibran on “Love and Desire”
Love has no other desire but to fulfil itself. But if you love, and must have desires, let
these be your desires:
To melt and be like a running brook that sings its melody to the night.
To know the pain of too much tenderness.
To be wounded by your own understanding of love - And to bleed willingly and
joyfully.
To wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving.
To rest at the noon hour and meditate love's ecstasy;
To return home at eventide with gratitude.
And then to sleep with a prayer for the beloved in your heart & a song of praise upon
your lips.
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