Interdependency
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How are relationships like economies? What is exchanged?
What determines if we’ll stay in our current relationships?
Why do some relationships fall apart quickly?
How can we remain satisfied in our relationships?
Social Exchange
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Maximum reward at minimum cost
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Rewards – anything that brings enjoyment or
fulfillment to the recipient
Costs – financial expenditures, injuries,
frustrations, restrictions, etc.
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Outcome = Rewards – Costs
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We want the BEST possible outcomes
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Outcomes are measured against our
expectations
Comparison level (CL) – the value of
the outcomes that we believe we
deserve in our dealings with others
Basic Math:
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Outcomes > CL = Satisfied relationship
Outcomes < CL = Dissatisfied relationship
Caveat: Even if you are making a profit, you
may not think that profit is big enough
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Comparison level for alternatives (CLalt) –
outcomes that we can receive by leaving our
current relationships and moving on to the
best alternative partner
But when do people actually leave?
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Must consider the availability and desirability
of potential alternatives
Prospect of loneliness
Investment in the current relationship
(Rusbult, Drigotas, & Verette, 1994).
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Tangible items (furniture, money, etc.)
Psychological benefits (love and respect from inlaws, for example)
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CLalt is whatever you think it is
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May be influenced by self-esteem and
access to information
Outcomes – CLalt = dependence or
independence
Types of relationships in
interdependency theory
outcome
outcome
CLalt
CL
CL
CLalt
A happy, stable
relationship
CLalt
outcome
CL
A happy, but unstable
relationship
A happy, stable
relationship
CL
outcome
CLalt
An unhappy, but
stable relationship
CLalt
CL
CL
CLalt
outcome
An unhappy, unstable
relationship
outcome
An unhappy, unstable
relationship
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How might people’s CLalt’s influence their
interactions with one another?
Betty’s and Barney’s outcomes
Betty’s CLalt
Barney’s CLalt
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Principle of lesser (least) interest – the
partner who is less dependent on a
relationship has more power in it
CL and CLalt over time
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We may become used to wonderful treatment
from our partners, raising our CL
But if outcomes remain the same, satisfaction
will decrease
As for CLalt, we may have entered the age of
“permanent availability”
Rewards and Costs over time
Costs
Rewards
Beginning
Developing
Established
Beginning
Successful Relationships
Unsuccessful Relationships
Developing
Established
Graphs adapted from
Eidelson, 1981
Other good vs. bad exchanges
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Gottman and Levenson (1992) observed that
well-regulated couples maintained a ratio of
positive to negative exchanges of 5:1 or
better
Well-regulated couples were more satisfied
Four years later, 56% of poorly regulated
couples were divorced vs. 24% of wellregulated couples
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We’ve seen that satisfaction can
decrease as CL’s rise over time
But outcomes tend to decrease over
time, too
Relationship satisfaction declines in the
first few months after marriage
How come?
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Remember social cognition? Impression management
takes work
Trivial annoyances may build up through repetition
Partners may reveal secret information (intentionally
or accidentally)
“Fatal attractions”
Birth of children (unrealistic expectations)
These may also be the very things that keep people
from marrying in the first place, as they are
discovered over time
Are we really this greedy?
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Providing good outcomes for one’s partner
can ultimately be self-serving
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It may influence them to stay
It may influence them to do nice things for you,
too
Nevertheless, there is plenty of
compassionate thoughtfulness in
interdependent relationships
Exchange vs. Communal
Relationships (Clark & Mills, 1979)
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Exchange relationships – carry the
expectation of immediate repayment for
benefits given
Communal relationships – carry the
expectation of mutual responsiveness to one
another’s needs
Equitable Relationships
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Proportional justice – each partner gains
benefits that are proportional to his or her
contributions (Hatfield, 1983)
A relationship is equitable when the ratio of
your outcomes to your contributions is similar
to that of your partner
Your outcomes
Your contributions
Your partner’s outcomes
=
Your partner’s contributions
Partner A
Partner B
a)
80
50
=
80
50
b)
20
100
=
20
100
c)
50
25
=
100
50
Partner A
Partner B
d)
80
50
≠
60
50
A is overbenefitted
e)
80
50
≠
80
30
A is underbenefitted
What are some ways to restore equity?
If both partners are prospering, does it
even matter?
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Equity theory suggests that people are
happiest when the relationship is fair
Overbenefitted people should feel guilty and
somewhat less content
Underbenefitted people should simply dislike
the unfairness of the situation
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Studies show that no one likes being
underbenefitted
But research is inconsistent regarding
overbenefitted people and equity in general
When might equity matter?
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Division of household tasks
Childcare
Commitment
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Commitment can be either a happy
dependence or a burdensome entrapment
It can result from both positive and negative
influences
Investment Model
Satisfaction
Level
Quality of
Alternatives
Investment
Size
(Rusbult Drigotas, & Verette, 1994)
+
+
Commitment
Level
+
Decision to
remain
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Very good generalizability
Useful for predicting relationship duration,
faithfulness, and even if battered wives will try to
escape their abusive husbands
Other types of commitment?
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Personal
Constraint
Moral (e.g. long-distance relationships)
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Commitment leads people to take action to
protect and maintain a relationship, even
when it is costly to do so
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Accommodative behavior
Willingness to sacrifice
Committed couples also consider their
relationships to be superior to others’