Content, Style, and Communication
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“Have something to say, and say it as clearly as you can.
That is the only secret of style” (Matthew Arnold)
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“You will discover that you can write more clearly once
you more clearly understand what you are writing about.”
(earlier edition of Williams)
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“As we struggle to master new ideas, most of us write
worse than we do when we write about things we
understand better.”
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Experience in 448W
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Good writing leads to good learning
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Avoided separate content & writing grades
Reveal Ideas, Don’t Hide Them
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C. W. Mills quote: “A turgid and polysyllabic
prose does seem to prevail in the social
sciences.”
Example:
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It [the classical model] is a view that hinges on
everyone in the economy holding an affinity for
efficiency.
R: The classical model implies that the economy
uses resources efficiently.
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Possible verb choices: shows, demonstrates, predicts,
asserts
Another Example
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Ultimately, supply-side and demand-side
macroeconomics aim to achieve an analogous result.
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R: Ultimately, supply-side and demand-side
macroeconomics aim to achieve the same result.
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Good: “aim to achieve,” fairly active.
Michael Crichton (from Williams): “Some writers plump
up their prose to impress those who think that
complicated sentences indicate deep thinking.”
Fazzari’s Law: Writing is Research
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Corollaries: Writing is understanding; writing is
learning
Williams (the writing-understanding “multiplier”):
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As [writers] rewrite that first draft into something clearer, they
understand their ideas better. And when they understand their
ideas better, they express them more clearly, and the more
clearly they express them, the better they understand them …
and so it goes, until they run our of energy, interest, or time.”
“Perfection is the ideal, but a barrier to done.”
Correctness and Choice
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Grammar rules vs. writer choices
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Need to write in modern English
But Williams as liberator from rigid rules
Strategies:
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Safe blind obedience
Risky choice, more possible reward but chance of
coming across as a little careless or excessive
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What is our level of confidence as writers?
Careful with unusual word choices; look them up
Example: “predicates” (to affirm or assert)
Example 1: Expressing Contrast
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The classical model predicts the economy will always
operate at full employment. But U.S. data show that
many workers are unemployed in recessions .
The classical model …. However, U.S. data show …
The classical model …. U.S. data, however, show …
Note how choice depends on objective
 How strong do we want contrast to be?
 Challenge to think consciously about your writing; not
just stream of consciousness
Example 2: Split Infinitive
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The price level adjusts to quickly close the gap between
actual and potential output.
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The price level adjusts to close quickly the gap between
actual and potential output.
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Emphasizes “quickly” and modifies “close”
Seems awkward
The price level adjusts quickly to close the gap between
actual and potential output.
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OK, but shifts emphasis from gap to price level.
Rules to Follow
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“Affect" is a verb and “effect" is a noun. Be careful.
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Use a hyphen to connect multi-word adjectives
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No: The money supply effects the price level.
Yes: The money supply affects the price level.
Words have definitions: if you ignore them you do not communicate well
This article discusses the short-run effects of monetary policy.
Improves clarity by identifying adjective phrases.
But: Monetary policy has real effects only in the short run.
Don’t get carried away:
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Say’s Law is a hard-to-understand-but-profound feature of classical
theory.
R: Say’s Law is hard to understand, but it is a profound feature of
classical theory
Characters and Actions
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Sentences are clearer when the main character is
the subject and the main action is the verb
Lesson 3: use verbs in sentences to convey primary
actions
Lesson 4: associate subjects of sentences with
primary characters
Work on these things together: getting actions into
verbs often clarifies characters
Advice applies to clauses as well as full sentences
Actions and Characters: Example 1
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Supply-side economists see increased saving as
beneficial.
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R1: Supply-side economists argue that higher
saving benefits the economy.
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Main character: “supply-side economists;” OK. But think about
“theory” as alternative.
Main action hidden in adjective “beneficial”
Verb “see” is ineffective and imprecise. Who “sees” saving? Get
main action into the verb.
Other verbs: believe, predict
R2: According to supply-side theory, higher saving
raises investment and potential output
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More information, but not too many more words; now sentence
shows how higher saving “is beneficial”
Avoids creating somewhat distracting character (supply-side
economists); main noun “higher saving,” is main character
Actions and Characters: Example 2
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Supply-side and demand-side macroeconomics both
utilize government policies to influence economic
behavior.
R1: Supply-side and demand-side macroeconomic
theories both predict that government policy influences
economic activity.
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Refine the action; make it more precise. Theories predict, they
don’t “utilize”
R2: In both supply-side and demand-side
macroeconomic theories, government policy influences
economic activity.
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Shift of character from “theories” to “policy”
Actions and Characters: Example 3
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Supply-siders acknowledge activist policy as doing
more harm than good.
R1: Supply-siders argue that activist policy does
more harm than good.
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“Argue” vs. “acknowledge:” issue of precision and strength. Does
“acknowledge” sound more academic because it is a big word?
“As doing;” clunky, awkward, clumsy. How to identify?
R2: Supply-siders reject activist policy because it
hurts the economy more than it helps.
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Better match between action and verb choice (“reject”)
Shift of character to supply siders
Actions and Characters: Example 4
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Labor demand is set at the firm level
R1: Firms set labor demand
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Make true character of the idea (“firms”) the
subject of the sentence
Avoids passive voice verb
R2: Firms choose employment to maximize
profits
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A few more words, but more descriptive verb
(“choose”) and more information for the reader
It Can Be Done!
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If prices are “sticky,” then compensating
shifts in AS occur slowly and output actually
strays from the potential level for a time.
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Terrific sentence from a 448 student paper
“Compensating shifts:” great choice of character
“Strays:” nice verb
Could shorten “the potential level” to just
“potential”
Nominalization: Hiding Actions in Nouns
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Higher saving causes a decrease in the interest
rate, which will lead to an increase in investment,
which will result in increased future output.
R1: Higher saving decreases the interest rate which
raises investment and future output.
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Saves words. “Will result in” says next to nothing; “causes
a decrease” emphasizes causation, but word order in R1
implies causation in a more efficient structure.
“Raises” rather than “increases” for word variety.
R2: Higher saving causes the interest rate to fall
which raises investment and future output.
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Keeps “cause,” but avoids nominalization.
Another Nominalization Example
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Frictions such as sticky wages prevent
market clearing from occurring.
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“Market clearing” is a noun phrase that substitutes
for an action
“From occurring” awkward, “clunky”
R1: Frictions such as sticky wages prevent
markets from clearing.
R2: Because of frictions like sticky wages,
markets do not clear.
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Note character shift between R1 and R2
Awkward Actions – Inefficient Sentences
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The two models end up with different theories as
to which policies would prompt an effective
economic response.
R1: The two models lead to different policy
recommendations.
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“End up” and “prompt” are poor action choices
“Effective economic response” is implicit in policy;
what else would we want?
R2: The two models recommend different
policies.
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“Recommendation” is a nominalization, but do models
“recommend?”
Techniques Apply in “Real World!”
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From early version of Brown-Fazzari-Petersen
Journal of Finance paper: Mature firms have a
longer track record, allowing for easier
assessment of true market values.
R: Mature firms have a longer track record,
allowing outside investors to more easily assess
true market values.
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Change nominalization to verb: assessment to assess.
Identify “hidden” character in original (“outside investors”).
What about split infinitive?
“That allows” vs. “allowing?”
Passive Voice Verbs
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The economic analysis is sensible, although you
need to work harder to make sure that your
assertions are well supported and the logical links in
your analysis are clear.
The economic analysis is sensible, although you
need to work harder to support your assertions and
clarify the logical links in your analysis.
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Character and action (you / support & clarify)
Passive verbs (forms of “to be,” is, are, was, were, has
been …) are a signal that the action in your sentence is
possibly hidden
Oops! Passive verbs signal the possibility that your
sentence hides the action.
Precision and Accuracy in Word Choice
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Use words that accurately describe the underlying
concept.
Know what words (and concepts) mean!
Careful application of economic concepts:
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The production function defines how much output the given
labor supply will produce.
The classical model explains how utility maximizing
behaviors determine equilibrium production and
employment.
Content: Logic and Causation
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Words such as “since” and “because” imply logical causation.
The placement of ideas in a sentence or sequence of
sentences can imply causation.
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Make sure logic is correct and clearly stated.
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The interest rate falls, investment increases, firms accumulate more
capital, and potential output rises.
“Another way to reach potential output is with technology.”
With unemployment and lower demand, workers bid down the
nominal wage and firms cut prices to increase aggregate demand.
** Say’s Law holds in the classical model because investment
equals saving
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Say’s Law holds in the classical model because investment absorbs
saving forthcoming at full employment.
Finish Your Points
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Do not assume the reader can fill in the blanks.
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From a discussion of the Say’s Law process: “A decrease in
consumption, for example, will result in an increase in saving.
This increase in saving will decrease the interest rate in the
loanable funds market, causing an increase in investment.”
(32 words)
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Good start, but finish the point. Why does higher investment help in this
example?
Revision: A decrease in consumption, for example, raises
saving and lowers the interest rate in the loanable funds
market. The cost of capital falls and investment rises to fill the
demand gap caused by lower consumption. (35 words that do
a lot more!)
Support Your Assertions
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Make sure assertions and conclusions are
supported by previous analysis.
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Comments such as “Why?” or “How?” often signal
this problem.
Develop points adequately. Are you
expecting too much from your readers? If
you can’t develop a point adequately, cut it.
Make Words Count - 1
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“Vague:” need to make point more concrete; try to
provide more specific information.
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Perhaps you do not fully understand the underlying point.
Hiding lack of full understanding behind lots of words
Link all points you make to the main argument. If
they don’t tie in, they don’t belong in the essay.
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Ex: “diminishing returns” in classical model essay.
Might link to profit-maximizing behavior through secondorder conditions, but it would take a lot of words to develop
this secondary point. (If you can’t develop fully …)
Make Words Count - 2
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Avoid “metadiscourse” sentences that add little.
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Example 1: In order to properly understand how this
equilibrium is brought about it is necessary to understand
the intuition behind the model. (21 words)
Example 2: In this brief essay, I will summarize the basic
theoretical results and driving factors of the classical
macroeconomic model.
Don’t share your full thought process with your
reader. The reader just needs to see the final result.
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Revise!
Think About Your Audience
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Professor? (almost never the right audience
for student writing.)
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Often not the right audience for research writing,
considering the narrow specialization of expertise.
Other students in class (often the right
choice)
Intelligent, but uninformed, public (news
articles).