A Pilgrimage of Hope
Brotherhood, gift of communion in love
Circular of the Superior General
Bro. José Ignacio Carmona
INTRODUCTION
“To have the love of God is to possess all the virtues: faith, hope…
It is to see our neighbour as the image of God, a part of Jesus Christ,
and with that the whole of the law is fulfilled.”
(Father André Coindre)
“Fraternal charity must be the soul of our Congregation.”
(Venerable Brother Polycarp)
One of the most pleasant activities of my life has been teaching. A good teacher
usually begins a new term by reminding his students of the material that was covered
in the previous term and then proceeds to establish a link with the next topic. This is
what I hope to do by means of this introduction: that is, to give a brief review of the
path already covered in our pilgrimage of hope, to take stock, and then to trace our
road-map for the next part of our journey.
It has already been two years since our general chapter. We Brothers and our
partners in mission, conscious of the love of the Father and aided by the gift of the
Spirit, are striving to respond to the challenges of the Resurrected Lord who invites
us day after day to progress on our “pilgrimage of hope along the path of
communion.”
I have previously underscored that this path has three dimensions: communion with
God, communion with our brothers and communion in the charism (spirituality,
brotherhood, mission) among all the members of our extended family (cf. A
Pilgrimage of Hope, p. 20). I am giving the broadest scope possible to the word
“family” to include brothers, our partners in mission, and those to whom our mission
and ministry are most directly intended.
My two previous circulars which were sent to all our local communities dealt with the
theme of communion with God. Now I take up the challenge of writing on fraternal
communion, which will be the theme of both this third circular and the one following.
I am conscious that the topic is a vast one, and I know that I cannot exhaust the topic
by any means. I therefore pray the Holy Spirit to come to help me with his gifts so
that, notwithstanding the successes and the failings with which our fraternal life is
woven, I will be able to discern those things that must be said. The pedagogue
knows that he cannot teach everything; his hope is that his students learn at least
what is fundamental. Shall I succeed in saying what is essential? Whether the
answer is affirmative or negative, I rely on your generosity and your understanding.
I am equally convinced of the relevance and magnitude of this topic. The Chapter of
2006 reflected at length on the meaning that we ought to give today to the expression
“launch out into the deep.” In the booklet on the acts of the chapter we read that this
expression meant that we want “to live the present moment of our religious life as
brothers with renewed hope… and affirm the essentials of our religious life” (A
Pilgrimage of Hope, p. 4). Does not community life play an integral and therefore
essential role in our life as consecrated men, especially since we define ourselves as
“religious brothers” (cf. R 17)?
Please God that this circular and the one to follow will contribute to the revitalization
of inter-personal relationships in each of our communities as requested by our
general chapter (cf. A pilgrimage of Hope, p. 17). In this way our communities will be
schools of good relationships and signs of God’s love for our partners in mission, for
those among whom we principally minister, and for the broader Christian community.
CHAPTER I
New communities for a new world
I shall begin my reflection by explaining why I have chosen the theme of fraternal
communion for this circular.
In recent years the world has experienced overwhelming cultural changes in terms of
both theory and practice. There has been a significant shift in thinking and a
transformation of both institutions and values. This evolution has in turn fostered
significant changes in society, in the world and in religious life, and even the fraternal
life of our local communities has not been exempt from its influence.
Some of these cultural changes are positive. This is most certainly the case in regard
to developments in science and technology, advancements in the rights and freedom
of the individual, the tendency toward more democratic systems of government, the
growing importance afforded to emotions and to art, etc. Other changes, however,
have been negative, like metaphysical relativism – there is no such thing as absolute
truth – and ethics – there is no distinguishing between good and evil – the hic and
nunc, individualism, superficiality, the lack of meaning in life, etc.
Among other significant changes in society we note the growing influence of the
media and other means of communication, the rise in individual initiatives and the
increasing influence of civil society, the struggle for human rights, the evolution of the
concept of authority, women’s rights, the growing fragility of the family unit,
hedonism, materialism, the reality of a world becoming more and secular – all of
which leave little room for transcendent values.
With regard to the sphere of economics, there is on the one hand the notion of neoliberalism, globalization, astounding economic development, and on the other a
growing gap separating rich countries from poor countries. In this regard it is said that
the proportion of per capita of rich countries relative to poor countries is today 100 to
1, whereas it was 6 to 1 in 1900. The number of individuals deprived of things
considered indispensable for a life of minimum dignity continues to increase. The
world has lost its way and is being bled by interminable wars which are born of an
insatiable thirst for power and a taste for wealth, all to the detriment of justice and
equality.
In her wisdom always ancient and always new, the Church of our era has recognized
in many of the changes the seeds sown by the Word Incarnate and has denounced
those that go counter to both the divine plan and the dignity of the individual and of
all people. The Church desires to be an expert in humanity, open to dialogue with the
world, more independent than the temporal powers with which she seeks to interact,
committed to improving the conditions of life for all, especially the poorest, striving for
justice, desiring to be seen as a house of and school for communion, willing to be a
link between nations and a herald of Jesus Christ, Word of the Father, the only one
able to save mankind (cf. Ac 4:12; Gaudium et Spes, § 10.2).
The numerous changes mentioned above impacted our local communities and
entailed a variety of consequences that I now wish to recall.
The decrease in vocations in the northern hemisphere is part of this fallout. Fifty
years ago most of our local communities had many members; most of our apostolic
works were staffed almost exclusively by brothers, with lay staff limited to the barest
minimum. In 1968 when I began to exercise my educational ministry in Vittoria,
Spain, there were thirty brothers on the faculty, and most of these were relatively
young. Today the number of brothers in the local communities is much reduced and
oftentimes with a relatively high average age.
In other parts of the world, economic development has meant that the state takes
charge of most of the educational and health services which had formerly been
entrusted to men and women’s religious communities. Many brothers are no longer in
works that in the past they had administered. They have become “civil servants.” All
of this has entailed a good deal of questioning on the meaning of the religious
vocation as much on the individual level as on the community level.
In those areas where we still have our own educational works, we have to compete
with state and other private institutions that offer the same services. This requires
that we commit enormous effort, at the risk of falling prey to activism and neglecting
essential aspects of our religious, communal and apostolic life.
On the other hand, in their desire to build the Kingdom of God here and now, our
communities are more open to the world. In the past they closely followed a monastic
life-style, so much so that everything was done to the rhythm of a community life
underpinned by the observance of a rule whose prescriptions on all aspects of life
were clearly defined. But with today’s openness much of the treasure of community
life has been lost.
There are other factors which have influenced our religious life to the extent that in
some places, our apostolic tasks have become more individualistic, and community
life has often suffered the repercussions. In other places many brothers are old or
retired, and adapting to community life becomes problematic for younger brothers.
Another factor is that today our communities are reduced in size. This reality brings
both positive and negative consequences. Paradoxically, even though possibilities for
electronic communication are ever on the increase, interpersonal communication has
become increasingly difficult, and our frenetic life-style leaves us little time either for
ourselves or for others.
Finally, our own new governmental structures have greatly affected our community
life emphasizing as they do dialogue, co-responsibility and subsidiarity.
The changes that have so impacted our religious life in recent years challenge us to
seek a new and more authentic way of living fraternal communion. It is within this
context that the chapter of 2006 with its re-reading of the signs of the times earnestly
invited us to live hope and to be signs and builders of that hope in today’s world. To
attain this objective, the chapter invited us to undertake a pilgrimage along the road
of communion, one of whose fundamental dimensions is fraternal communion.
CHAPTER II
Vocation to Communion
Men and women are social beings
Over the course of recent centuries there has been a resurgence of interest in the life
of prehistoric man. Numerous archaeological digs have unearthed a range of human
remains that confirm that humans have always lived in groups.
If an intelligent being from another part of the cosmos were to land on our planet, he
would be truly astonished. Among the living beings encountered, he would quickly
distinguish a species that walks upright, lives within a family unit, among neighbours
or friends, in towns and villages. He would conclude that these earthlings
communicate with their fellow beings, celebrate together and work with them to make
tools and machines that allow them to travel on land, on sea and in the air; to
cultivate the land for their livelihood; to extract raw materials from the earth’s crust
and from its bowels, transforming them into useful products.
No one has been able to theorize with any degree of certainty the existence of
humans who were born into this world and lived utterly alone. In fact, living among
other humans, confiding in others and sharing with others is essential to humans. To
contend that a human can live utterly alone is as absurd as theorizing that a circle
can be simultaneously round and square. Humans are undeniably social beings, and
the human person is always a person-with-others.
Either we exist with others or we do not exist at all. The lone human is a negation of
what a human is. If it were possible for a human to live alone, and even if all of his
fellow beings were at his service (cf. Gn 2:20), he would never manage to realize his
human aspirations; he would never be truly fulfilled; he would always have the feeling
that life is futile and has no real meaning.
It is said that the social condition of humans is manifested in his openness to his
fellow beings. Such openness is essentially possible thanks to the human’s capacity
for communication. Human beings are essentially rational; they are capable of
speaking and listening, of seeing and being seen, of giving (offering) and of
receiving, of loving and of being loved.
The human person becomes progressively more sociable, that is to say, that he or
she takes on a culture as a result of ongoing relationships with others in the
community (family, school, work place, etc.) This cultural appropriation consists in
acquiring both theoretical and practical knowledge (understanding), in exchanging
ideas and in sharing values (vision), and in becoming identified with various social
groups by observing the laws and norms of life in common (behavior).
In the image of the God who is communion
The conviction that humans are by nature social beings finds substance and authority
in God’s revelation in Scripture. Moreover, this same revelation provides us with the
profound reason for the social condition of all human beings.
In fact, the revealed Word and theology present God to us as a unique being in three
persons: Father, Son and Holy Spirit. The Father has a perfect image of himself, and
since it is perfect, this image exists as a real and distinct person whom we call the
Word, the Son of the Father. The Father loves his Son with a tremendous love and
the Son also loves the Father with infinite love. This exchange of love is perfect and
exists as a distinct person, which Scripture calls the Holy Spirit, the Paraclete, the
Comforter. The Spirit is therefore love in person, that is to say, the relationship of
reciprocal love between the Father and the Son.
God is not, therefore, an old bachelor who out of boredom created the world. God is
family: Father, Son and Holy Spirit. God is communion of persons, simultaneously
distinct and perfectly united in love. In God is found the most perfect unity in the most
profound diversity.
The Trinitarian God created humans in his image and likeness (cf. Gn 1:26-27) for
communion. Every human being comes into this world endowed with this vocation to
communion. He is in the midst of creation the germ of and the desire for communion.
Humans are open to communication, to dialogue, to relationships with the world; and
they are called by God to enter into an intimate relationship with Him and to live
interpersonal communion with their fellow men and women, forming a universal
family (cf. Fraternal life in Community, § 9).
The rupture of God’s plan and its restoration
Men and women were created for communion; but under the influence of the spirit of
evil, they thought that in rejecting God, they would become like Him (cf. Gn 3:5).
Yielding to this temptation to power and domination, they chose to separate
themselves from God.
We know the consequences of the fall of our “first parents.” On the one hand the
rejection of God – the Other, with a capital letter – brought with it the rejection of
mankind – the other, with a small letter: a brother commits the ignominious crime of
killing his own brother (cf. Gn 4:8), the first of a long line of disagreements among
men and women and of so many fratricidal wars that have stained the history of
mankind with blood and continues to do so today. On the other hand, the fracture of
the harmony between man and God brought with it natural imbalances which find
their echo in the deluge (cf. Gn 6:5ff). Later, human kind, driven by the lust for power
and grandeur, with a desire to surpass even God, decided to build a tower as high as
the heavens (cf. Gn 11:1-9). We know the ending of the story: the ambition to build a
world without God becomes the root of the deep division among human kind.
Despite human ingratitude, God does not admit defeat. God who created men and
women in his own image and likeness decides to sow the ultimate seed of goodness
and love in the depths of the human person. To this end, in the fullness of time, he
sends his Son upon earth so that in taking on the fullness of the human condition he
might be brother to all men and women (cf. Fraternal Life in Community, § 9; cf. R
22).
Jesus, the Word Incarnate, shares his life fully with us. From then onward, we who
had been far from God were enabled to be brothers of Jesus by the grace of the
Spirit and thus regain our condition of sons of the Father. Thanks to the life and
resurrection of the Lord, the re-uniting of the scattered children of God becomes
possible (cf. Jn 11:52), and we are able to realize anew our common vocation of
sons of God, Father of us all, and thus become brothers to one another. This is what
Jesus requests in his prayer: “I pray not only for these but also for those who through
their teaching will come to believe in me. May they all be one, just as, Father, you are
in me and I am in you, so that they may also be in us, so that the world may believe
that it was you who sent me” (Jn 17:20-21; cf. R 22).
Love of God and love of neighbour
One day a young man was reflecting on what was said above. “Who am I,” he
mused, “that God should have created the world and all its marvels for me, that he
should have given me life, that he should have sent his Son to share his life with me?
What have I done to deserve all of this? Why has God given me so much? I am but a
poor creature,” he said to himself, “and I have never done anything to deserve so
much wealth. God in his great love and mercy has deigned to look upon my lowliness
and has desired to shower me with his gifts.”
The pure, noble and generous heart of the young man was overflowing with feelings
of deep gratitude. Love had just come to birth in his heart and he asked himself,
“How can I possibly respond to this immeasurable love of God for me? What can I
do?”
The young man had learned from his teachers that God is infinitely wise, powerful
and happy. While this realization filled him with joy, he nevertheless experienced a
deep sense of sadness because he would say to himself, “If this is the case, then I
can do nothing for Him. There is nothing I can teach him, because he knows all
things; I can be of no help to Him because He has need of nothing; I can in no way
make him happier because his happiness is perfect.”
One day as he was reading the Gospel, he read the words of the king to those who
had shown compassion to their fellows: “Come, you whom my Father has blessed,
take as your heritage the kingdom prepared for you since the foundation of the world.
For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a
stranger and you made me welcome, naked…, sick…, in prison…. In so far as you
did this to one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did it to me“ (Mt 25:34-40).
These words were a revelation to the young man. Their message was clear: If you
wish to do something for God, help others. Your love for others is a proof of your love
for God. Prove to God that you love Him by loving your brothers. Reading other
pages of Scripture convinced the young man that love of God and love of neighbour
were absolutely inseparable; with a greater knowledge of the Gospel, he realized that
Jesus had spent his life doing good; that is to say, he was at the service of others. So
he chose to make of his own life a continual offering, loving God by placing himself at
the service of his brothers and sisters.
Brothers, the story I have narrated shows that we cannot separate love of God from
love of neighbour. In the words of St. John, “My dear friends, if God loved us so
much, we too should love one another. … Anyone who says ‘I love God’ and hates
his brother, is a liar, since whoever does not love the brother whom he can see
cannot love God whom he has not seen…. Indeed, this is the commandment we
have received from him, that whoever loves God, must also love his brother” (1 Jn
4:11.20-21).
Vatican Council II, inspired by the teachings of St. Augustine, declares that the
Church is necessary for salvation but warns those who think that they are already
saved by the mere fact of being members of the Church. The Council fathers teach
that “he is not saved, however, who, though part of the body of the Church, does not
persevere in charity” (Lumen gentium, § 14).
There have been people in the past who, under the influence of an individualistic
spirituality and from a purely vertical perspective, prayed a great deal, participated in
the Eucharistic liturgy and received the sacraments, had a range of pious practices,
and performed much penance.
But at the same time such people could make life intolerable for others, because
charity and love of neighbour were not factors high on their list of concerns. Of this
sort of person, some would say, “These persons believe in loving God intensely
because they’re incapable of loving anyone else.” Others saw them as “saintly”
people, while those who had to live along side them were real martyrs.
You will easily understand that the caricature that I have just presented is totally
contrary to the Gospel message. Following Jesus requires today, as it always has,
that we be intimately united with the Father and deeply united with others. The
Christian is not a solitary being but rather one who lives in solidarity with all people.
This is what we read in a hymn of the Divine Office:
“Where there is a Christian
there isn’t solitude
but only love;
for the Christian bears the Church
in the depths of his heart.
And he always means ‘us’
even when he says ‘I’.”
What is love?
Fraternal life consists in living together united by bonds of love. But, what is love,
really?
If that question were put to people, we would get varying answers: a passion that
drives us to seek intimacy with another person; to make love; a feeling of
compassion towards another; solidarity; or an availability to serve others, etc.
Given such diverse answers, we must come to some consensus on the meaning of
the word “love.” Having reflected on this topic for some time, I put to you my
interpretation. I am referring to love in the most general sense of the word, without
any religious connotation. Love is a disposition and a praxis of service which have at
their source an acknowledgment of the worth of the other as person, and
consequently, a concern for his or her wellbeing.
Knowledge of the other leads to a full acceptance of the other, and from the latter
love is born. Let us call to mind the old Latin dictum, “nihil volitum qui non
præcognitum”. No one can love what he or she does not know. Love is born of a
deep awareness of the worth of the other, not only for what the person does, but
especially for what that other person is and what he or she is called to be, for his or
her intrinsic value, for the inherent dignity of the person.
Naturally the person who loves also needs to acknowledge his or her own worth, for
anyone who is not conscious of that worth and has no love of self cannot love others.
Along with this attitude or disposition, there must be a certain availability; that is to
say, of being habitually available for service and for support. It is not a matter of
something fleeting.
It was by design that I used the word “praxis” above, because I wanted to underscore
the fact that love does not consist only of good intentions but especially of
accomplishing good deeds.
I have defined love as a disposition and a praxis of service towards the other person,
which are born of a recognition of the worth of the other person and of the good that
is wished for him or her. It follows, therefore, that it is possible to love without any
physical manifestations. It is clear that such manifestations are good and desired by
God in a loving and committed couple. They are signs of love and they help to unify
the two by bringing to their relationship the well-being of physical intimacy and
pleasure. This is the physical dimension of the couple’s love; but it must be
complemented by affection, tenderness, dialogue, understanding, mutual help,
support, service, etc.
We must not confuse love with mere feelings or empathy. Love is not merely the
pleasure of encounter, affection for a dear one, or passion for a person towards
whom one is drawn. If such were the case, we could only and would be obliged to
love only those persons to whom we are naturally attracted. But the Gospel tells us
that we must love even our enemies, those whose faces we don’t even remember,
those for whom we experience antipathy, and those who seek and even succeed in
doing us harm (cf. Mt 5:43-47).
A growing love
Throughout the life of a human person, he or she develops the capacity for loving.
Initially, it is a love of self-interest, the fruit of natural attraction, a sort of love that
might be summarized as a tendency to seek out the other for personal pleasure. This
is equally the case in the selfish love of the child who receives everything and gives
nothing in return. This possessive love is called eros.
Gradually, the person who develops normally passes from a self-interested childish
love to an adult love, an increasingly gratuitous love. This is the passage from selfish
love to unconditional love by the person who gives a great deal more than he
receives and even by the person who increasingly draws closer to the goal of a total
gift of self without expecting anything in return. This love, this total gift of self is
unique and is called agape.
Over the course of one’s life a person never attains perfectly the objective of this
agape love, because agape love always keeps some element of self-interest or eros.
Eros is called to perfect itself, to draw closer and closer to agape.
Loving with the Heart of God
“It is only in God and for God
that we can truly love ourselves with a righteous love.”
(Father André Coindre)
“The measure of the love that we ought to have for our brothers
is to love them as Jesus Christ has loved us.”
(Venerable Brother Polycarp)
In the true sense of the word, there is no other agape love than the love of God. This
love is revealed ever more clearly in the Word of God throughout the history of
salvation which culminates in Jesus. Every Christian is invited to tend more and more
towards agape love, that is, to love Jesus with a heart totally free and generous.
Our Rule of Life alludes to this passage from eros love to agape love when it speaks
of “the transfiguration of our love” (R 74). As Christians we are called to love every
person and every thing with an unconditional love which is nothing but the pure gift of
self, a love which only seeks the good of others: my brothers in community, my
students, my partners in mission, parents, etc. Yes, we are called to love with God’s
own love, which is perfect love.
But just how can a human heart come to love with God’s love? Is it even possible?
Would our tragic destiny be to be able never to slake our deep thirst for loving?
The following little story is an attempt to answer these questions. A little girl and her
father were walking in a park. The child wanted to pick a flower that was beyond her
reach. So her daddy put her on his shoulders and she was able to pick the flower.
Now she was able to admire its beauty, experience its freshness, breathe in its
perfume, and realize her dream of saying to her father, “Daddy, I love you and this
flower is for you.”
The little girl had found a way to show her father that she loved him because he was
willing to lift her onto his shoulders so that she might pick the flower. Likewise we are
able to love God and our neighbour with a love that grows increasingly more like
agape love because God has gifted us with his own heart to love through us. In other
words, God offers us the Heart of his Son so that we in turn can say to him in all
truth, “Father, I love you and I also love all your children, my brothers and sisters.”
The Spirit places the Heart of Christ into our hearts so that through him we love the
Father and all our brothers and sisters. The life of communion in the Christian
perspective is therefore a spiritual reality, a gift of the Spirit and not exclusively the
fruit of simple human love. Taking up once more the words of St. Paul when he
speaks of the natural man and the spiritual man (cf. 1 Co 2:14-15), we can equally
speak of a natural love and of a spiritual love that may be translated respectively by
eros and agape. Isn’t this precisely what the Apostle suggests when he writes,
“Though I should give away to the poor all that I possess and even give up my body
to be burned, if I am without love, it will do me no good whatever” (1Co
13:3)? Natural love is love of self; spiritual love is love in the name of the love of
Christ, and the basic hallmark of that love is gratuitous service.
Natural love can lead a person to accept great sacrifices for the sake of the beloved:
to give away all his or her goods, to sacrifice health, and even to surrender one’s life.
But this love is born of the affinity that we have for the other, the sympathy or
empathy that one experiences for the other, family ties, the natural tendency to
rejoice with those who rejoice and to be compassionate towards those who are
suffering, the desire to be supported by the other in our own adversity like the person
who says, “Today is your day, tomorrow will be mine.” Basically, it is love for the
other, but in terms of the other being the reflection, the mirror of one’s self. And that
is still a selfish love.
If our love is not the fruit of the Spirit but simply something in the natural or human
order, we remain throughout our lives mere beggars for affection, always seeking first
and foremost to be loved by others. The Christian, however, does not render service
in order to be loved but rather because he loves others so deeply, and he is
energized by his love for Christ. He loves his neighbor with a gratuitous love,
eschewing reciprocity. He is inhabited by God; he gives of himself to others who see
in his solicitude the love of the Father.
The educator or the formator who is lacking in maturity usually accompanies children,
young people, and even the not-so-young searching for affection. His goal is in no
way gratuitous service but self-interest: he is seeking his own enhancement and the
esteem of others. He demands that those whom he accompanies manifest their love
for him and trust him. He imposes himself on them and does not allow them to be
themselves. On the other hand, the person who loves with a spiritual love is
sufficiently detached from himself to allow others to be themselves and to respond
freely to the Word of God and the grace of Christ.
Spiritual love is the love of a human heart which is inhabited and energized by the
Heart of Christ. Clearly we are speaking of the love of a flesh and blood person.
Therefore, spiritual love is not synonymous with ethereal invisible love, deprived of all
external signs. Quite to the contrary, this love shows itself by an array of exterior
signs and gestures: a long, caring look; listening to the other; a warm greeting; a
message sent; a word of encouragement or congratulation; an invitation to have a
drink; a phone call when circumstances warrant, etc.
CHAPTER III
Living is…
“Many opportunities for knowing, accepting, and loving each other
arise from our sharing of the same ideal of life and apostolate.”
(R 26)
“Humility must hide us on earth, but love, charity must lose us in God.”
(Father André Coindre)
The Brother of the Sacred Heart believes in the love of God, lives it and spreads it
(cf. R 13) according to the charism of the institute. But to live the love of God requires
that we be true brothers, that we love one another.
I said earlier that there are several ways of understanding love. I also noted that true
Christian love comes from God, for love is a gift of the Spirit. St. Paul speaks to us of
love in his hymn to charity (cf. 1 Co 13:1-13). Without presuming to exhaust the topic,
I will present below a few concrete ways of living love on a daily basis.
Loving is knowing
I have already emphasized that love is impossible without knowledge. It is in
interpersonal communication that one comes to this knowledge.
… maintaining harmonious and meaningful relationships
“Brother, do you love me enough to share deeply with your brothers your wounds,
your deep desires, your hopes and your encounters with me?”
(A Pilgrimage of Hope, p. 16)
Maintaining harmonious and meaningful relationships requires that we draw nearer to
one another, that we become interested in one another, that we truly share life. A
religious community is not merely a group of individuals who reside under the same
roof in anonymity and isolation.
During my fraternal visits throughout the institute I come across some model local
communities, communities who are aglow with fraternal spirit. In those communities
the brothers are eager to share with me the good relations that exist among them.
They tell me that they dialogue, they listen to one another, and this always allows
them to find within community someone with whom to share their life’s story, either
personal or family; they can share their joys and sadness, their wounds, their
successes and their difficulties, their relationships with others, their deepest longings,
their hopes, and their faith journeys. This sharing helps them to discern the paths of
the Lord throughout their lives; it is for them a great support to their perseverance in
fidelity to their vocation.
But here and there, I also meet brothers who also share a life with their confreres, but
with heavy hearts confide in me that they feel isolated and alone. There are
unfortunately local communities where men live in the same house, but where each
one is steward of his own livestock and lands, as it were. Everyone is busy with his
own affairs, his own work or his own concerns. Add to all of this an abuse of the
internet, cell phones, television or “outside” relationships, habitual and unexplained
absences from the local community, whether by day or by night, and the result is
situations in which there is no time for brothers to develop friendly relationships which
could foster knowledge, support, mutual esteem and sincere and authentic affection
for one another.
… affirming each person (cf. R 25)
To really know another person is to discover gradually his or her physical and
intellectual qualities, ideals, and deep wealth of spirituality. This knowledge leads to
admiration and appreciation of that person’s true identity. As we progressively come
to know what is within the other, we discover that the person’s limitations and failings
do not constitute his or her deepest identity which is, in fact, built upon the
individual’s natural goodness.
… being with our brothers
In writing what follows I risk being labelled as reactionary. There are those who might
criticize me, thinking that I am suggesting a model of religious life based exclusively
on a community life lived out under the same roof and with an excessive amount of
rules and regulations. Such a vision of community life is simplistic and not at all the
hallmark of a community life characterized by friendly relations, dialogue and
communications, by the fact of knowing, helping, and accepting one another, by the
sharing of our relations with God, and by fraternal life and mission. In other words, a
community of life where true love finds its dwelling place.
In reality, I simply want to call to mind what our Rule of Life affirms regarding the
charismatic and social aspects of fraternal life lived in common. This latter aspect
should not restrict the freedom of the Spirit but rather allow for the expression of the
“the demands of charity” (R 31).
It is clear that in order to be signs of the Kingdom our communities must be open (cf.
A Pilgrimage of Hope, p. 16). But this openness must not be understood as a
dispersion of the brothers to the point that they only gather together for community
prayer and meals…if even that! Fortunately, it seems that this happens in few cases.
A few years ago, an elderly brother used to tell me, “Keep to your cell and your cell
will keep you.” Obviously we cannot return to that era in which our life was more or
less modelled on a monastic life-style. We are religious of the active life. But it must
be said, and this especially to the young, that the brother who lives a life of
nonconformity, who goes out and returns at unseemly hours of the night, and never
informs his brothers of his whereabouts, is placing his vocation at serious risk. My
dictum is, “He who always says where he’s going never goes where he shouldn’t go.”
Through a sense of family spirit, whenever we are to be absent from the community,
we ought to let someone know where we’re going, with whom, why, approximately
when we expect to return, etc. Isn’t this what happens in all good families?
For professional or social reasons, parents too have more and more difficulty in being
with their families. As educators we are aware that there are children who spend
much time alone or in the care of a third party. This can have negative repercussions
on their education. There are parents who assert, “It’s true that we spend little time
with our children, but the time we do have with them is quality time.” The response is
obvious: there has to be at least minimum time to be able to speak of ‘quality time.’
The members of any family need to find time to be together. It’s good to be able to
share as brothers not only moments of prayer and of work, but equally other times
such as community outings, sports, a game of cards, going to a film or watching a TV
program which we talk about together afterwards, etc. Times like these are never
wasted, for the community is always the winner when brotherhood is celebrated.
Loving is accepting
Mutual trust is born of the conviction that each person is a being loved by God and by
others for who he or she is.
… accepting others
Acceptance of self is easier when we feel that others accept us. How good it is to live
in a local community where brothers accept one another and where there is mutual
love! “How good, how delightful it is to live together as brothers! It is like fine oil on
the head, running down the beard, running down Aaron’s beard, onto the collar of his
robes” (Ps 133:1-2).
Loving is accepting the other in his difference. It would be utopian to believe that
there can be total uniformity in community. The strength of a local community may be
measured by its acceptance of the differences among its members.
Love “is always ready to make allowances…” (cf. 1 Co 13:7). The person who loves
looks more at the positive qualities of the other than at the faults. In reality, positive
qualities tend to be more in keeping with what a person is and what a person is
called to be, rather than faults which correspond neither to who that person is nor to
what he or she may become.
The person who loves always speaks well of others. People tend to have more good
qualities than faults. That is why it ought to be so much easier to speak of a person’s
strengths than of his weaknesses. However, the sad reality is that more often than
not we rub shoulders with brothers who have become ‘specialists’ in criticism of
others. This divides the community and poisons fraternal life. These brothers ought to
be encouraged to speak more charitably with their brothers than to talk about them.
In the letter of St. James we read, “If anyone thinks himself to be religious, and yet
does not bridle his tongue but deceives his own heart, this man’s religion is
worthless” (Jm 1: 26). A little further he emphasizes, “Brothers, do not slander one
another. Anyone who slanders a brother or condemns one is speaking against the
Law and condemning the Law. But if you condemn the Law, you have ceased to be
subject to it and become a judge over it. There is only one lawgiver and he is the only
judge and has the power to save or to destroy. Who are you to give a verdict on your
neighbour?” (Jm 4: 11-12).
A few years ago, I read that a wise desert monk, well advanced in years, was asked
to leave his monastery and act as judge over a confrere in another monastery. The
old monk found a knapsack, filled it with sand, and made a small hole in the bottom
of the sack. Then he slung it over his shoulder and set off for the other monastery.
The monks saw him coming from a long way off and ran to meet him. When they saw
that he was carrying a knapsack over his shoulder and that there was a thin stream
of sand flowing from it, they thought his behaviour a bit odd; and so one of the monks
asked him, “Father, why are you travelling in such a manner?” He replied, “My whole
life long I’ve left behind me a trail of sins, and now I am being called to pass
judgment on my brother.”
This doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t talk about behaviours and attitudes that leave
something to be desired. But we should do so in front of the person or persons
concerned, in an appropriate time, place, and manner so that we never offend the
dignity of the individual.
… a caring gaze
In our relations with others, we can daily observe the transforming effect of a caring
gaze from a person who clearly desires the wellbeing of the other person.
As religious educators we have all encountered children and young people in
difficulty, children who have had to live through difficult family situations or problems
with their peers. We know from experience that an all-embracing and caring glance,
or giving our full attention while wanting only the best for the other, and letting the
young person know that we have confidence in him or her can produce
extraordinarily positive changes. This is the case of the child who at age nine had not
yet learned to read until he met a good and understanding teacher. It’s also the case
of the youngster who could not fit in at any school until he met teachers who believed
in him. It is the case of yet another youngster who was doing everything he could to
be disruptive at school in hopes that his parents would send him back to his former
school where he felt he had been appreciated by his teachers.
The better we know others the more we appreciate them for their positive qualities
and despite their faults. Moreover, we know very well that it is never easy to make
headway. But doesn’t the Imitation of Christ affirm that “if we manage to correct one
fault a year, we would soon be perfect”?
… forgiving
Generally speaking people have a tendency to love those who love them and dislike
those who hurt them. After the example of God the Father, loving towards even the
most ungrateful and immoral of his sons and daughters, the Christian is recognized
by his love for his enemies (Lk 6: 27ff). We become men and women of forgiveness
in the measure in which we accept that God is always ready to forgive us and that He
sent his Son to heal us and to teach us how to love. We come to this realization
especially in the sacrament of Reconciliation. Frequent recourse to this sacrament
motivates us to forgive our brother and with renewed hope to restore our fraternal
relationship with him.
The one who truly loves knows how to forgive and continue to love the offender,
desiring to see him continue his journey on the way to greater perfection.
Forgiveness is the sign of spiritual health; it promotes both physical and mental wellbeing. The person who bears a grudge allows thoughts of antipathy, vengeance and
revulsion to fester within him, and this climate can hardly foster peace of soul; in the
end, it can even affect physical health. “Mens sana in corpore sano,” goes the Latin
dictum. On the other hand, the one who forgives tastes the peace and joy of those
who desire the good of others and are ready to serve them.
Forgiveness is one of the most difficult gestures or attitudes for any person. We all
have a natural tendency to bear resentment towards anyone who has hurt us. This
antipathy manifests itself in various behaviours: we may refuse to speak to the “guilty
party”; we take every opportunity to criticize or to say unpleasant things about him;
we are antagonistic even towards that person’s friends; we are against him in every
possible circumstance; we are on the lookout for any false move on his part so as to
be able to fault him; and possibly we even refuse to lend him a hand when he needs
our help. You may tell me, “Any similarity with our lived experience is mere
coincidence. Such things never happen in my local community!” Come on, be honest;
this happens often enough, at least with others.
Forgiving is much more difficult for people who have been deeply wounded in their
childhood. We have such persons in our local communities, especially in recent
years with the increase in family breakdowns. Sometimes professional or spiritual
counselling can help in moving beyond such problems. But fairly often, despite all
external assistance, the wounds remain open. And so there are brothers who are
condemned to live their entire lies with blockages, forced to learn to live with their
difficulties. Our understanding can help them to survive.
Lack of forgiveness is one of the principal causes of friction in local communities. The
brother who causes discord does great damage to his local community, because he
is an impediment to the presence of Christ. Didn’t Jesus say, “Where two or three are
gathered together in my name, I am in the midst of them” (Mt 18: 20)? I point out that
the text says “gathered together” (united), and I presume that to be “gathered
together” does not mean simply to be living side by side, but rather to be living in
unity. In fact, unity in the local community is both a manifestation of the presence of
Jesus in its midst and a prerequisite for his enduring presence. The person who
promotes unity helps to create the conditions for the continued presence of Jesus in
the community. Likewise the one who creates discord deprives the community of the
inestimable gift of the presence of Christ in its midst.
Loving is serving
After telling the parable of the Good Samaritan, Jesus asks the doctor of the Law,
“Which of these three, do you think, proved himself a neighbour to the man who fell
into the bandits’ hands?” He replied, “The one who showed pity towards him.” Jesus
said to him, “Go, and do the same yourself” (Lk 10: 36-37).
The priest who served in the Temple was in principle very close to God. The Levite
was well acquainted with the Law and what was to be done or avoided in every
aspect of life. But the only one who showed real love was the Samaritan. He was the
only one to place himself entirely at the service of the unfortunate man who had
suffered the grievous assault. He washed the man’s wounds, cared for him, took him
to an inn, and paid for his lodging.
The person who has experienced the mercy of God feels disposed to serve others.
And serving means helping, supporting, as counsels the Apostle, “Carry each other’s
burdens; that is how to keep the law of Christ. Someone who thinks himself
important, when he is not, only deceives himself” (Ga 6:2-3). Paul considered that
being disposed to service is the hallmark of the humble. He invites us to humility
when he says, “Never pride yourself on being better than you really are, but think of
yourself dispassionately, recognizing that God has given to each one his measure of
faith” (Rm 12:3). There are other important services that we can offer to our
neighbour: listening to him, encouraging him, especially in times of difficulty, helping
him to discern, offering him good advice, sharing the Word of God with him,
encouraging him to follow Christ, etc.
The greatest in the Kingdom of Christ is the one who considers himself the least.
Jesus taught his disciples this when he told them, “You know that among the gentiles
those they call their rulers lord it over them, and their great men make their authority
felt. Among you this is not to happen. No; anyone who wants to become great among
you must be your servant and anyone who wants to be first among you must be
slave to all. For the Son of Man himself came not to be served but to serve and to
give his life as a ransom for many” (Mk 10:42-45).
We cannot speak of service without mentioning the Virgin Mary, Jesus’ mother and
the mother of us all. She is the servant of the Lord (cf. Lk 1:38) and of all God’s
children. She is the servant who accompanied Jesus during his life, even to the foot
of the cross. She was always attentive to the needs of others, as at the marriage
feast of Cana (cf. Jn 2:1-11). By her presence characterized by exemplary solicitude,
discretion, and prayer, she placed herself at the service of the unity of the early
Church (cf. Ac 1:14); she continues her loving service as she intercedes with the
Blessed Trinity for unity among her beloved children, pilgrims on paths the world
over.
… concern for the smallest details
Community is built one day at a time. And daily life is made up of a host of little
things: preparing meals, doing the dishes, looking after the garden, leading
community prayer, decorating the dining room for celebrations, taking part in
community meetings, visiting a brother who is ill and seeing to his needs, writing to
brothers far away, congratulating a brother for a job well done or for achieving a
given objective, sending birthday or Christmas cards, etc. Let’s do all of those in a
spirit of love and affection.
….accepting to be served
Serving others requires sacrifices and effort, but it brings with it the satisfaction of
feeling useful and receiving thanks. We like to feel useful; we appreciate a word of
affirmation from our brothers for the good we accomplish. As Scripture says, and it is
true, “There is more joy in giving than in receiving” (Ac 20:35). Sören A. Kierkegaard
expressed the same sentiment when he said, “The door to happiness opens from
within. We must back up a bit before opening it. If we push the door, we close it still
more.”
Especially during our years of formation there was always an emphasis on service
and on availability to render service. Doubtless we live to love, but let’s not forget that
we also need to be loved.
When we were young we harboured many ideals and exerted a great deal of energy;
we felt happy and the world belonged to us. But in middle age our experience
allowed us to place more importance in the execution of our work. But time goes by
and one year follows another; our health declines and our level of energy diminishes.
Then comes the time for slowing down our pace of life. In more serious cases, illness
obliges us to give up acts of material service. We who had been servants now
become dependant on others.
An elderly brother who was physically limited told me once, “In my current situation, I
am a burden on the institute. All I do is give work to the other brothers and work up
expenses.” But I told him, “During your whole active life, you gave unconditional
service to your brothers and to the mission of the institute. You lived love as you went
about helping people. Now it is time for you to let yourself be loved and to accept the
help you need. Besides, despite your handicap, you can offer your brothers and
many others the inestimable service of your prayers, your hope, your serenity, your
patience, your wisdom, your kindness, your mercy, and your interior peace. You are
a treasure for the community; you are the wise man who by the way you live your life
teach us much more than we could learn in books.”
… making others happy
Loving means doing everything we can to make life pleasant for others; it is making
them feel at ease so that they can experience the happiness of always feeling
affirmed and supported, and so that they can sustain that “joie de vivre.” We are in
community not only to be happy but especially to make others happy.
… fraternal correction
In the letter to the Colossians we read, “As the chosen of God, then, the holy people
whom he loves, you are to be clothed in heartfelt compassion, in generosity and humility,
gentleness and patience. Bear with one another; forgive each other if one of you has a
complaint against another. The Lord has forgiven you; now you must do the same. Over
all these clothes, put on love, the perfect bond. And may the peace of Christ reign in
your hearts, because it is for this that you were called together in one body. Always be
thankful. Let the Word of Christ, in all its richness, find a home with you. Teach each
other and advise each other in all wisdom. With gratitude in your hearts sing psalms and
hymns and inspired songs to God; and whatever you say or do, let it be in the name of
the Lord Jesus, in thanksgiving to God the Father through him” (Col 3: 12-17).
I cited this marvelous text of St. Paul because it summarizes so beautifully the love
that we ought to have for our neighbour. We note that at the end of the text, the
Apostle exhorts us to fraternal correction, one of the greatest expressions of fraternal
love.
We are very familiar with Matthew’s text on this theme: ‘If your brother does
something wrong, go and have it out with him alone, between your two selves. If he
listens to you, you have won back your brother. If he does not listen, take one or two
others along with you: whatever the misdemeanour, the evidence of two or three
witnesses is required to sustain the charge. But if he refuses to listen to these, report
it to the community; and if he refuses to listen to the community, treat him like a
gentile or a tax collector” (Mt 18: 15-17).
Note the first words of the exhortation, “if your brother.” This is Jesus’ way of saying
that the person who takes on the responsibility of correction must do so in a fraternal
spirit, out of love for his brother, motivated by affection and concern for him. Only
love for the other person can produce a truly positive change in him. The person who
corrects through coercion and with an attitude of contempt or resentment can only
increase further the climate of discord that exists.
It is also necessary to emphasize the importance of the way to practice fraternal
correction: first, the one-to-one meeting with the brother; if he does not mend his
ways, two or three others must be present during the next encounter; finally, if the
individual still refuses to change, the rest of the community must be informed. All
these stages in the process of correction require respect, discretion, and charity; and
they make clear the desire to do everything possible to help the brother.
Nowadays it seems that we rarely practice fraternal correction. Is this perhaps due to
individualism, to respect for the liberty of each brother, to a lack of love of God or of
neighbour? Or do we believe that it is up to the superiors only to fulfill this duty? It
can happen that superiors entrust this task to other members of the local community
who in turn leave it to the superiors, and in the end, nothing gets done!
Our Rule of Life invites us to “forge true friendships which go as far as fraternal
correction” (R 25). Each one of us ought to be disposed to welcome those who
endeavour to correct us and show our gratefulness to them. It might be a good
initiative to choose someone in the local community who can help us become aware
of our faults and accompany us on our journey of human and religious growth. One
additional observation: the community evaluation of our PAC is a form of communal
fraternal correction.
CHAPTER IV
Ecclesial Community, Religious Community
The Church, Sacrament of Communion
The Christian vocation to communion is realized in the Church. Among the
documents of Vatican Council II, the Church is presented as a communion of the
faithful. In fact, don’t most of the Council documents refer to this fundamental
identity? That is why we say that the Council presented an ecclesiology of
communion.
In the pastoral constitution Gaudium et Spes we read, “Just as God did not create
men to live as individuals but to come together in the formation of social unity, so he
willed to make men holy and save them, not as individuals without any bond or link
between them, but rather to make them into a people who might acknowledge Him
and serve Him in holiness. At the outset of salvation history He chose certain men as
members of a given community, not as individuals” (Gaudium et Spes, § 32.1).
The Church, the Body of Christ, is an assembly, a community, a family, “a people
brought into unity from the unity of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit” (Lumen
Gentium, § 4). The Church “is in the nature of sacrament, a sign and instrument, that
is, of communion with God and of unity among all men…” (Lumen Gentium, § 1).
In the Acts of the Apostles we can read with wonderment how the Church increased
through the action of the Spirit. These pages reveal to us a youthful Church, full of
vitality, emboldened by growth through the fresh air of brotherhood. It gathered
together around the breaking of the bread and under the constant protection of Mary,
that mother full of solicitude. We remember that well known phrase which described
that first Christian community: “The whole group of believers was united, heart and
soul; no one claimed private ownership of any possessions, as everything they
owned was held in common” (Ac 4:32). Christians have maintained this image in
spirit as the prototype of what the Church ought to be since it summarizes the ideal of
every Christian Community over the centuries.
Religious community, expression of communion
The unity of the Church, well-beloved spouse of Christ, is the fruit of the action of the
Holy Spirit (cf. Fraternal Life in Community, § 9). Likewise, religious community is
also a gift, a fruit of the love of God poured out by the Holy Spirit who unites all its
members “like a true family in the name of the Lord” (Perfectæ Caritatis, § 15). Over
the course of centuries, the Spirit has given rise to numerous religious families,
which, under diverse forms, live communion as an essential part of their life style.
Vatican Council II underscored the vital importance of fraternal religious life at the
heart of the Church and the world by affirming that this style of life is an
unquestionably integral part of the life and holiness of the Church (cf. Lumen
Gentium, § 44).
Fraternal religious life witnesses to the unity of the Trinity. In his apostolic exhortation
Vita Consecrata, Pope John Paul II affirmed that, “The fraternal life seeks to reflect
the depth and richness of this mystery, taking shape as a human community in which
the Trinity dwells, in order to extend in history the gifts of communion proper to the
three divine Persons” (Vita Consecrata, § 41). Earlier the Holy Father had explained
how fraternal life reveals each of the three persons of the Trinity: “It proclaims the
Father, who desires to make all of humanity one family. It proclaims the Incarnate
Son, who gathers the redeemed into unity, pointing the way by his example, his
prayer, his words and above all his death, which is the source of reconciliation for a
divided and scattered humanity. It proclaims the Holy Spirit as the principle of unity in
the Church, who ceaselessly raises up spiritual families and fraternal communities”
(Vita Consecrata, § 21).
The Church is the Sacrament of the plan of God that involves men and women living
as children of the Father and as brothers and sisters, sharing the graces of God and
the goods of this world. And consecrated life is a charism of service for this divine
plan. “All the members of the Church should unflaggingly fulfill the duties of their
Christian calling. The profession of the evangelical counsels shines before them as a
sign which can and should effectively inspire them to do so” (Lumen Gentium, § 44).
In all of this the duty of brotherhood is the most important for it is the hallmark of
authentic disciples of Jesus (cf. Jn 13: 34-35).
We Christians, and especially we religious, are in this world of pilgrims in search of
unity, the reflection of Trinitarian communion. The Spirit helps communities to be that
expression of communion. Jean Vanier writes, “The unity of the Father and the Son
is total, substantial. Every community must tend towards this unity, but it can only be
realized in the mystical order by and in the Holy Spirit. Here below, the only thing we
can do is to walk humbly toward that unity.” 1
Consequently religious communities are signs and expressions of ecclesial
communion: “Experts in communion, religious are therefore called to be an ecclesial
community in the church and in the world, witnesses and architects of the plan for
unity which is the crowning point of human history in God’s design. (Fraternal Life in
Community, §10). They accomplish this mission especially by means of the
evangelical counsels, signs of their intimate union with God and of fraternal life
understood as communion in life, in prayer and in apostolate (cf. Fraternal Life in
Community, § 10). In this way religious life proposes models of holiness to the
Church and to the world.
Fraternal life, the risk
“We are all men, and, full of faults and imperfections as we are,
we all provide our neighbour with sufficient cause for patience.
But on the other hand, we are also very weak and vulnerable,
and so we need his help and support.”
(Venerable Brother Polycarp)
1
Translated from VANIER, Jean. La communauté lieu du pardon et de la fête. Montréal, Éditions
Fleurus/Bellarmin, 1979, pp. 35-36.
Community is always a reality in progress. The “ideal community” is a fiction. But one
of the motives for many of us to enter religious life was seeing happy brothers
generously engaged in a common project, united through fraternal love, and helping
one another. Gradually, with the passage of time, we realized that community is not
that perfect milieu that we had imagined it to be. But neither is it so bad as to give
Voltaire reason to maintain that persons entered religious life without knowing one
another, lived it without loving one another and died there without being mourned.
Religious life is simultaneously beautiful and difficult. It’s easy to love the street kids
of Calcutta, but it’s difficult to love those who share our roof. It’s difficult to go from
selfishness to love, from the “me” to the “us,” from the community for my own
interests to my interest for the community. This passage is a long one and lasts a life
time. Religious life is also arduous because it requires a great deal of purification, a
dying to many things before arriving at that “interior freedom, freedom to love and to
be loved.” 2
The difficulties inherent in community life have a range of causes. I will limit myself in
the following paragraphs to highlighting a few of them.
The basic problem arises from the imperfection of the people that we have around us
in community. It is, of course, impossible to create a perfect mosaic with imperfect
pieces. It is axiomatic that humans are not perfect, but they are at least perfectible,
that is to say capable of always striving for perfection.
St. Paul presents us with a human being who is a paradox: “The good thing I want to
do, I never do; the evil thing which I do not want, that is what I do” (Rm 7:15). On the
one hand a person tends towards good, thanks to the God of light. On the other,
under the influence of the powers of darkness, that same person tends toward evil,
making power, domination, and prestige his or her goal in life, rejecting love-service.
A person aspiring to possess material wealth risks setting aside God, who is
supreme wealth, and ignoring the neighbour. Seeking after selfish pleasure renders
impossible a relationship of self-giving love. The person who seeks after prestige in
life cannot be seeking either God or neighbour. Does activism respond to the spirit of
the Gospel, a spirit of generous and humble service, or does it rather reveal an
inclination to seek success in order to secure power and domination?
Sometimes our imperfection may take on the guise of immaturity. Many conflicts in
community life flare up as a result of our having ceased to grow as persons.
Immaturity manifests itself at times in selfishness, which prevents us from
experiencing unconditional love. Lack of self-esteem is another symptom of
immaturity. Lacking in self-assurance, we become envious of what others have; we
become spiteful, full of aggression and quarrelsome, projecting upon others our
complexes and our wounds.
We’re all more or less immature. Immaturity is partly the result of a personal history
marked by past negative experiences such as a lack of affection, family
disagreements or violence, poverty. These experiences often cause wounds that
show themselves through insatiable desires, fears, frustrations, complexes, a lack of
2
Translated from VANIER, Jean, op. cit., p. 4.
self-esteem, jealousy, scornfulness, destructive or self-destructive feelings.
Undesirable qualities often result from suffering and from a lack of understanding.
Those who have suffered in the past are perhaps still marked by the pain and
continue to suffer and to cause others to suffer. Mutual support and a healthy
spirituality can help one to surpass these difficulties or, at least, to live with them.
However, there are cases when these persons are not suited to enter religious life.
Individualism and the desire for independence can equally be factors which make life
in community difficult. As we have seen above, though his vocation is to love, man
always retains some remnants of selfishness. To this individualism is added the
desire for a freedom understood as an absolute independence. And so there are
persons who want to live a life of solitude. They come to community prayer and to
some meals, but then they disappear to occupy the rest of their time in strictly
personal endeavours. These persons are independent, but basically they are not free
because freedom always tends towards doing good for and being concerned about
others.
Community life is no less easy for people who are different, because of nationality,
age, culture, formation, education, aptitude, temperament or character. To these
differences must be added the fact that we do not choose our confreres, but at a
certain point in our lives, we were called to live together in order to form community.
It can happen that living with people different from ourselves, we begin to wonder
whether our way of being is the right one. If we lack self-confidence, this question
can begin to disturb us and create within us a certain sense of insecurity, and
insecurity can give rise to prejudices against others.
Such prejudices frequently exist among persons of differing cultures or nationalities.
We may have been brought up believing that our culture and history are the best, to
the detriment of others. Isn’t it true that facts of history are the same for everyone?
However, people are prone to recount history from their own point of view and
usually to their advantage. And what is true of history is equally true of cultures. I
often say that coming from a particular place does not make us superior or inferior to
anyone else; we’re just a bit different. It’s worth adding that what we hold in common
goes beyond our differences; what unites us is stronger than what separates us. It’s
good to value what is specifically ours while simultaneously appreciating the richness
in others.
Historical and cultural biases frequently poison the life of local communities where
brothers from different backgrounds live side by side. We’ve heard, for example, of
conflicts between missionary brothers and indigenous brothers, once these latter
have increased in number, age, wisdom and grace. Such conflicts are probably due
to a lack of mutual appreciation and trust, to a desire to lord it over others, to pride,
and to a lack of charity.
To overcome these conflicts there is a need for a good deal of common sense, both
human and divine help, personal communication, sincere and constructive
community dialogue, a deep relationship with God, discernment, a good supply of
kindness and humility, and a great amount of brotherly love.
We brothers who come from various countries and who are living a community
project in the same province or in the same local community give witness of a
fraternal life which is a reflection of the God-Love and of His desire to create a world
of brotherhood. Surely this is the greatest witness that we can offer, and it is the
cornerstone of all other forms of witness. Without the evidence of love, everything
else risks losing its value!
Caricatures of community 3
Last September when I began writing this circular, someone gave me a book from
which I’ve selected some ideas to offer you a few caricatures of local communities.
Clearly a caricature is not a photograph. The artist always exaggerates some
particular physical trait of his subject. Could one or another of the local communities
that I present in any way resemble one of ours? We might do well, brothers, to reflect
on these sketches both personally and in community and try to identify the caricature
which best reflects our community life, and hopefully glean some notions as to how to
build, day by day, a fraternal life which is ever more evangelical. Perhaps you may
even come up with other types of caricatures.
Let us begin with common life in community. It is characterized by regularity, but
there is hardly any communication among its members. Its principle traits are
regulations and uniformity: everyone does the same thing in the same way at the
same time. The community horarium is generally adhered to, and the work load is
intense. The brothers gather together daily in the chapel, in the dining room, and for
some in the T.V. room. Relations among them are cordial but superficial; the brothers
really do not know one another. The local superior is generally authoritarian.
I call the second model the community of managers of apostolic works. In this
community the one really important thing is the ministry, in which most of the brothers
hold positions of responsibility. Prayer life, if it exists at all, is restricted to the bare
minimum. What counts above all is efficiency, prestige and professional competence.
Life is limited almost entirely to work. The members are valued for their professional
effectiveness. The brother is first and foremost an excellent professional and the
superior, a good manager.
The third model resembles a community of social welfare. It is organized around
helping the poor, social services, or work on behalf of justice, but all to the detriment
of the other dimensions of religious life, such as spirituality, fraternal life, and the
forming of a Christian community for the proclamation of the Word, for liturgy, and for
the sacraments. Some members end up by becoming political militants. This model
of community and of the preceding one is generally notable for the activism of its
members. In both cases, religious life and ongoing formation take a back seat.
Living in community, being good professionals, working at the service of the most
deprived are all very good things. The problem arises when one or another of these
aspects is exaggerated to the detriment of the objective of religious life, which is the
« following of the Christ of faith, a particular following which encompasses the essential
3
From a text by PALMÉS, Carlos, S.J. Ser o no ser: la vida religiosa del siglo XXI. Bogotá: Coedición
Paulinas y CLAR, 2008, pp. 79 to 91.
elements of a deep experience of God, a community life which expresses the Christian
ideal of genuine mutual love, and a Gospel-inspired mission which goes so far as to
give up ones life for the sake of others by placing oneself at their service for the sake
of the Kingdom. And it is to all of that that we religious commit ourselves by the vows,
which are an expression of an interior attitude of total and selfless love.” 4
Fraternal community, a possible utopia
The expression “possible utopia” may appear paradoxical, given that generally
speaking “utopia” is synonymous with an ‘impossible dream,’ a mirage, an illusion.
But this is not the meaning intended here. Rather it refers to a dream that we realize
little by little but which we will never fully achieve. Utopia is possible because we can
daily draw closer to it by remaining always on the path that leads to it. The quest for
agape love, the perfect community, the beatitudes—all are utopian.
Every Christian community is “modeled on the community of the Twelve, gathered
around the Lord” (R 23). It was the model of the first Christian communities where
“the whole group of believers was united, heart and soul” (Ac 4:32).
We Brothers of the Sacred Heart are gathered together into local communities in
order to share a common ideal: to believe in the love of God, to live it and to spread it
(cf. R 13) in conformity with our own distinct charism. Every community finds its unity
in a common project, a goal, certain objectives. The fulfilment of this common
purpose and, as a consequence, the building of community is the work of a lifetime.
After Vatican Council II religious institutes of consecrated life underwent many
changes; but perhaps there is something fundamental lacking in many religious
communities: a life in community built on genuine communication and personal
relationships of true friendship. It is not merely a matter of saying that we are
brothers, but especially of actually being brother-friends, after the example of Christ
who said to his disciples, “I shall no longer call you servants, because a servant does
not know the master’s business; I call you friends, because I have made known to
you everything I have learnt from my Father” (Jn 15:15).
Developing fraternal friendships in our communities should not lead us to turn our
backs on the world. No, the religious community is not an end in itself. Quite the
opposite, for it is called to be open, so as to form a wider community and thus be a
sign of the community of the Kingdom.
I consider that the future of religious life depends in large measure on its openness. It is
not only a matter of praying well in community, of truly living as brothers should, of giving
of oneself with joy and generosity so as to contribute to the building up of the Kingdom, of
dedicating ourselves to the task of evangelization, especially through the education of
children and young people. It is also very much a matter of opening our local communities
to young people, to our partners in mission, to the people around us so as to share with
them the joys of living for God, united together in service for an extraordinary mission, that
of caring for God’s little ones. It is evident that not every community is able to have the
same openness. It’s easier in some. But in each province there ought to be at least one or
more local communities that try more and more to live this openness.
4
Translated from PALMÉS, Carlos, op. cit., p. 92.
Utopia is possible. Love can happen because the Spirit helps us to bring to fulfillment
the utopia of the Kingdom of the Father which is realized and finds its symbol in
Christ-centered communities. It is possible today to have communities of brothers
who are united around a common purpose of incarnating our charism in today’s
world.
It is possible with the grace of God and our collaboration with this grace to form
communities built upon a privileged relationship with God (spirituality) which gives
form to our fraternal relations and to our commitment to our mission of building up the
community of the Kingdom; truly fraternal communities based on dialogue and
communication, with deep relationships that are authentic and life-giving;
communities where the sharing of the brothers’ faith, life and mission constitutes their
way of being and becoming community in a process of ongoing renewal.
In the next circular, I plan to develop what I have just said in the preceding
paragraph. The title might be, “To be brothers, a common project. Building
community.” If all goes to plan, you should receive it in June, 2009.
CONCLUSION
Beginning to write a circular is like setting out on an adventure: you know your
starting point, but you never know exactly where you will end. You know the day
you start out, but there is no way you can know when it will end. At the beginning you
have some ideas, but you’re not sure how you will develop them nor in what order
you will present them, or what ideas as yet unknown will come to mind.
Writing a circular or a book is like life. We manage the present moment, but the
future escapes us. But isn’t the present that very reality that projects us towards the
future? Writing, like living, means taking risks, trusting, loving.
Fraternal life too is an adventure, a life-long pilgrimage on the road of communion
that Jesus, our brother, journeys with us day after day. It’s that adventure of
communion with the Father through the gift of the Spirit, of communion among us as
brothers and friends, of communion for service for the sake of the Kingdom.
Again, we emphasize that our vocation is communion. That’s why fraternal life is an
essential dimension of our lives. With that dimension religious life is a light that
warms and shines. Without it all is cold and darkness.
Brothers, let’s live as brothers at the heart of the People of God by opening the doors
of our local communities so that they may be signs of the Kingdom of the Father. Our
communities are expressions of communion at the heart of the Church, the
sacrament of communion, called to create other communities upon which to build,
day after day, the dream of universal brotherhood and a society of love.
In this circular I have shared with you some of my convictions: the love of God is
inseparable from fraternal love; fraternal life, however difficult, is possible because
the Spirit has imprinted upon our heart the Heart of Christ so that we may, with him,
love the Father and all our brothers with an agape love.
As we hear at the beginning of each Eucharist, “May the grace of our Lord Jesus
Christ, the love of God the Father, and the communion of the Holy Spirit be with you,”
so that we may, as our Rule of Life says, “live Christian brotherhood in a radical way
as a sign of the unity which Christ urges us to achieve” (R 22). May Mary, the
Mother of unity, intercede with the Blessed Trinity to make it so!
QUESTIONS
(For personal or community reflection; feel free to add to the list below)
1. To know, to accept, to pardon, to serve, to correct fraternally: are there any other
important verbs to define fraternal love?
2. What are some positive and negative aspects of fraternal life in your local
community?
3. What are some positive and negative aspects of fraternal life in your province or
delegation?
4. What do you bring to community? What does community bring you?
5. What can be done to help deepen communication among the brothers?
6. What would be the keys to creating a fraternal life that is more intense and which
offers a greater witness?
7. Etc.