CHAPTER TOPICS




What are Emotions?
Influences on Emotional Expression
Guidelines for Expressing Emotions
Managing Difficult Emotions
Looking Out/Looking In
Thirteenth Edition
 Physiological
Factors
• Strong emotions are coupled with strong
physiological factors
 Physical components of fear:





Increased heart rate
Rise in blood pressure
Increase in adrenaline secretions
Elevated blood sugar
A slowing of the digestive system
EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING
2
 Nonverbal
Reactions
• Feelings are often apparent by observable
reactions
 Appearance Changes
 Blushing, sweating, etc
 Behavioral Changes




Facial expression
Posture
Gestures
Different vocal tone or rate
EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING
3
 Cognitive
Interpretations
• The mind plays an important role in determining
emotional states
 The symptoms of fear discussed earlier are similar to
those of excitement, joy and other emotions
 If you were to monitor someone having a strong
emotional reaction, you would have a hard time
ascertaining which emotion the person was
experiencing
EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING
4
 Verbal
Expression
• Words can be required to discover the depth or
intensity of the emotion
• At times we can’t rely on perceptiveness to be
sure a message is communicated
 Is a new acquaintance mistaking your friendlessness
as a come-on?
 Is a lover’s unenthusiastic response a sign of boredom
with you, or something less personal?
EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING
5
 Personality
• There is a clear relationship between personality
and the way we experience and express
emotions
 Extroverts tend to report more positive emotions
 Neurotic individuals tend to report more negative
emotions
• Personality doesn’t have to govern your
communication satisfaction
EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING
6
 Culture
• A significant factor that influences emotional
expression in different cultures is whether that
culture is:
 Individualistic (United States and Canada)
 These cultures feel comfortable revealing their emotions to
people with whom they are close
 Collectivistic (Japan and India)
 These cultures prize harmony and discourage expressions
of negative emotions which may upset relationships
EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING
7
 Gender
• Biological sex is the best predictor of the ability
to detect/interpret emotional expression
 Research suggests that there is some truth to the
unexpressive male
 In one study, females were 10-15% more accurate in
remembering emotional images
• People in close relationships are likely to
experience/express more emotions than those
who are not
EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING
8
 Social
Conventions
• The unwritten rules of communication
discourage the direct expression of emotion
 How many genuine emotional expressions do you or
we see in daily life?
 Social rules even discourage too much expression of
positive feelings
• Emotion Labor
 Managing or even suppressing emotions is both
appropriate and necessary
EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING
9
Fear of Self-Disclosure
• In a society that discourages the expression of
emotions, revealing them can seem risky
Emotional Contagion
• The process by which emotions are transferred
from one person to another
 Is it possible to catch someone’s mood?
 Emotions become more infectious with prolonged
contact
There is not a universal rule for
expression of emotion
• Personality, culture, gender, play a part
• The key is to express emotion constructively
 Think about a time when you expressed your emotion
clearly, then wish you hadn’t.
• Those who control their feelings and deny
distress are more likely to get a host of ailments,
including cancer and heart disease
 Recognize Your
Feelings
• Beyond being aware, also try to identify
 Recognize
the difference between
feeling, talking and acting
 Expand your emotional vocabulary
 Share multiple feelings
• You might often express anger but overlook
confusion, disappointment or frustration
EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING
12
 Consider When
and Where to Express
Your Feelings
• Give yourself time to discover the gravity of the
emotion before full expression
 Accept
responsibility for your feelings
• Instead of saying:
 “You’re making me angry!” try “I’m getting angry.”
 “You hurt my feelings,” say “I feel hurt when you do
that.”
EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING
13
Be Mindful of the Communication
Channel
• Mediated Channels
 Email
 Instant Message
 SMS Message
• Is it appropriate to end a relationship via
voicemail?
• What is the result of using CAPITAL LETTERS in
an instant message or email?
Facilitative and Debilitative Emotions
• Facilitative Emotions
 Are emotions which contribute to effective
functioning
• Debilitative Emotions
 Are emotions which detract from effective functioning
• Intensity
 Anger or irritation may be beneficial
 Rage usually makes matters worse
Sources of Debilitative Emotions
• Our genetic makeup
• Emotional memory
 Harmless events can trigger debilitative feelings
• Self-talk
 Self-Talk
• Interpretations people make of an event, during
the process of self-talk that determine their
feelings
Event
Thought
Being called names
“I’ve done something wrong.” hurt, upset
Being called names
“My friend must be sick.”
EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING
Feeling
concern,
sympathy
17
 Irrational
Thinking
 The Fallacies
• The Fallacy of Perfection
 The belief that a worthwhile communication should
be able to handle every situation
• The Fallacy of Approval
 That it is vital to gain the approval of virtually every
person
EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING
18
Irrational Thinking
• The Fallacy of Shoulds
 The inability to distinguish between what is and what
should be
• The Fallacy of Overgeneralization
 Basing a decision on limited information
 When we exaggerate shortcomings
• The Fallacy of Causation
 The irrational belief that emotions are caused by
others rather than by one’s own self-talk
Irrational Thinking
• The Fallacy of Helplessness
 Satisfaction in life is determined by forces beyond
your control
• The Fallacy of Catastrophic Expectations
 The assumption that if something bad can happen,
then it is going to happen
Minimizing Debilitative Emotions
• Monitor your emotional reactions
• Note the activating event
• Record your self-talk
• Reappraise your irrational beliefs
• Replace self-defeating self-talk with more
constructive thinking
 What
are Emotions?
 Influences on Emotional Expression
 Guidelines for Expressing Emotions
 Managing Difficult Emotions
EMOTIONS: FEELING, THINKING, AND COMMUNICATING
22