What is a toy? And the importance of free play
“Play is the only way the highest intelligence of humankind can unfold.” Joseph Chilton Pearce
A toy can be defined as ANY item that can be used for play.
What is a toy? Is it something to take up the slack of a boring and lonely afternoon? Something that keeps the
child busy and out of the way? Something to have fun with? Something to fan the spark of creative play?
What are we looking for when we choose a toy for our child? Are we choosing it with the child in mind, or is
it the child in our grown-up bodies with adult consciousness choosing? For each of us at one time or another,
all of the above have been true. When we consider how much time our children spend with their toys, how
much more important it becomes for us to make conscious choices about what we give them. Do we not all
carry with us the fond memories of toys we loved and cherished when we were young? What memories are
we offering our children through their toys, with all of our best intentions?
How many toys should we give our children? This has become a real question in our affluent times and
presents us with hard decisions. Do we follow the dictum of “the more the merrier?” In this question we may
be reminded of those excellent family cooks who always became their most creative and joyful in the
kitchen, not when the pantry was stocked from top to bottom, but when the rest of their family had already
despaired that any meal could possibly come together from such scanty reserves.
This raises the question: what stirs creativity the most, fullness or vacuum? A doll with perfect features is
certainly a pleasure to look at. But if it is perfectly finished, is there much left for the child to play with? A
doll with only the hint of eyes, nose, and mouth is an unwritten book of expression for the young child.
Present children with potential, and they will fill it out of their own unlimited fountain of creativity. Present
them with finished products, regardless of how beautiful, and we will have unwittingly limited their own
resourcefulness.
This is one of the maxims of Waldorf education: give children only enough to stir their own creative
processes, and give them guidance in expressing what the lessons have awakened. This fosters true creative
activity in the soul-life of the child and leads to imaginative thinking in the adolescent.
Cedar Valley Waldorf School, Squamish.
What is an ‘open-ended’ toy?
Anything that inspires your child’s imagination in more than one way – something that can become
anything!
“We should have busy children, not busy toys!” Magna Gerber, RIE approach
Here are some things to look for when selecting toys for your children.
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Good quality, durability
‘Playability’
Anything healthy for humans and the planet
Natural materials that feel good to all our senses – including visually beautiful toys, toys that
feel good to hold.
Toys that can be put away in 5 minutes
Non-competitive, social toys
Toys that are toys – where ‘learning’ is not forced.
You DON'T have to spend money on awesome toys. In fact, the best toys ever are free, or very
inexpensive.
Top 10 open-ended toys EVER
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
A stick
A box
A rope/piece of string
A cardboard tube
A spade, a bucket, and some
sand/dirt/snow
6. A ball
7. Wooden Blocks
8. Large pieces of fabric (silks are
lovely: anything will do!)
9. A doll
10. Jars with lids
Also highly recommended:
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Wooden train sets (not with the
tables – the table can be limiting to
imagination and skill level!)
Baskets to put toys in (and to carry
them around in)
Costumes – don’t have to be fancy AT
ALL. Old grown up clothes work
beautifully!
Art supplies – glue, scissors, paper,
large crayons/pencil crayons etc – no
need for fancy kits
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Baskets of buttons & beads, string.
Polished crystals, geodes, river rocks
Pine cones, dried bark & materials
from the natural world
Deck of cards
Real life cleaning tools – child sized
broom etc.
Real life cooking tools
Real life mending tools
It’s important to allow your children to discover the toys themselves.
Resist the urge to show your child what to ‘do’ with their toys, and let them do
whatever they will do – let go of your expectations when it comes to play, and you
will be rewarded by a peek into a child’s true imagination!
Why open-ended toys and play?
In her book Playing to Get Smart, Betty Jones, Ph.D., urges parents to understand that
children and adults who are skilled at play with both things and ideas, have the power,
influence, and capacity to create meaningful lives. They are more receptive to ambiguity
than those who are stuck in the way things are or were. Play is a "happy talent."
Open-ended play helps foster happy talent in a relaxed way. It also supports the mission
behind the American Academy of Pediatrics' 2006 Report on the Importance of Play,
which emphasizes that all children need free, undirected play for creative growth, selfreflection, and decompression. Here's why it works:
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Less pressure. With no predetermined outcome, open-ended play eases off the
gas pedal of achievement and allows children to focus on creating based on inner
inspiration. During play, children have choices and decisions to make. This
format offers great potential for self-discovery.
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No errors. Since trial and error is part of open-ended play, unintended mistakes
cause children to pause and wonder. "Errors" produce fascination and foster new
creation. Self-initiating behaviors are developed.
Liberty at last. Open-ended play gives children a sense of freedom and
autonomy to develop initiative and self-confidence. They enjoy making choices
themselves, affirming their ability to be responsible and self-directed.
http://www.scholastic.com/parents/resources/article/creativity-play/endlesspossibilities
Kinds of toys you may want to consider discarding or storing:
1. Anything broken: put it on a ‘to mend’ pile if it can be mended. If you
haven’t mended it within 2 weeks, recycle it.
2. Anything missing pieces.
3. Anything developmentally inappropriate – toys they have grown out of, or
not yet grown into.
4. Anything ‘fixed’ in concept.
5. Anything that requires you to buy more of to make it work/keep it
working
6. Anything that comes with social pressure to you buy more/ collect
7. Anything too complicated or that breaks easily
8. Anything that requires batteries, makes electronic noise, flashes –
generally high stimulus.
9. Anything annoying, offensive or which encourages corrosive &
dangerous play (evil characters / war games)
10. Anything environmentally unfriendly or toxic - made of plastic
11. Anything that ‘forces’ learning – it’s just not as fun as figuring things out
yourself!
What is a ‘closed’ toy?
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Anything that only has one specific function
Anything that has one clear ‘right’ way to do it – for example, puzzles.
I put gender-specific toys into this category too, as they close off imaginative
play for boys or girls, and direct them away from avenues of empathy and
understanding the opposite gender.
Simplifying and sorting through your toys:
"An avalanche of toys invites emotional disconnect and a sense of overwhelm," Dr. Kim
John Payne
Create and choose your OWN guidelines for your OWN family. You have the power
to create, choose and live by your own family values, and this includes decisions
about your family environment – including toys.
Rotation: You don’t have to throw out all your toys. But there’s a lot to be said for
rotating them – much the same way we rotate our adult ‘toys’ of skis in the winter,
canoes & bikes in the summer – and aren’t they so much more fun when we haven’t
seen them in a while? Rotating toys seasonally or on a monthly basis is a great idea
for de-cluttering, seeing the power of less, without having to ‘give up’ toys on a
permanent basis.
Keep a ‘Grandparents Box’ of those well-intentioned toys from grandparents that
just don’t fit in… or better yet, be honest with grandma about your family values,
and ask her to respect your parenting choices. They’re yours to make.
2 easy ideas for gift giving:
4 little Somethings
5 Hands
Something they want
Handmade
Something they need
Hand-me-down
Something to wear
Second hand
Something to read
A helping hand
Hand in Hand
Article on toys & environment
Walt Whitman once wrote:
“There was a child went forth every day, And the first object he look’d upon he became. And that object
became part of him for a day or a certain part of the day, Or for many years or stretching cycle of years.”
Young children absorb the essence and form of everything they see. My 3 year old daughter is so taken by
everything she sees, that she immediately wants to pretend to be the object or person she just encountered.
Children learn sensorally from their immediate surroundings. They soak it all in on multiple levels and
absorb their impressions directly into their beings. These early impressions shape the way they come to
understand and view the world.
For this reason, we must make a concerted effort to use discernment with the things we expose our
children to. The optimum environment for their development is within the immediacy of the family and the
home, where they can touch, play and discover the world with their own hands an within a nurturing safe
place.
They need to hear the natural sounds in your home and play and climb and get attuned to their immediate
environments. We have been wrongly taught that children need to be constantly entertained, that more is
more, and that the sooner they can learn the better, but things have spun out of control. We need to get
back to basics, back to the essentials, back to nature.
We have to strip away all the layers of illusion, and beliefs and fear and listen to our hearts when it comes
to what is best for our young children. They are bright new little angels, so impressionable, we must take
good care and protect their innocence, their childhood. Times are moving so fast, children are young
adults; they are exposed to so much and are developing so young. As parents, we are their guardians, and
our job is to protect and nourish their development.
We need to go our own way, listen to our inner knowing and create a new reality for them. The most
important thing we can hope for our children is they feel connected to source and grounded in a strong
sense of self for who they uniquely are. Isn’t this what every parent would hope for their child? Isn’t this
what we hope for ourselves?
“Be as simple as you can be; you will be astonished to see how uncomplicated and happy your life can
become.” ~Paramahansa Yogananda
For when you make the effort to create the space to allow your child to develop organically, they learn to
develop their imagination and will spend hours engaged in creative playing on their own and you will get
the time you will need! It’s hard to imagine but it’s true.
When you are not constantly filling up their space with things to “entertain” them, they will reach that
space where they will feel “bored.” They will hit that wall and they will move through it! For out of
boredom a new idea eventually arises and is born. We cannot fill time with constant distractions. They
must learn to abide in their own selves and learn to use their imagination, their brilliant minds, to imagine
possibilities and endless ideas of fun and play. That is truly the greatest gift you could give your child.
Allow him to develop those muscles by creating that space for exploration.
Open-ended Toys
Open-ended toys are toys that are not defined and therefore can become many things within play. For
example Dora will always be Dora, she already has a storyline and persona attached to her as does every
other character or media-based toy. A toy that you press and it does something only captures a child’s
interest for so long and then its function is over. What else to do with it? With open-ended toys, they sky’s
the limit! A block can become a car, it can become a plane, it can be used to build a castle etc. With play
silks, children can play dress up, they can build forts, they can become blankets for their babies, they can
become a river, or a snake. The possibilities are endless.
Instead of getting your children a bunch of defined toys that “do” things or that are media characters, get
them a few open-ended toys you will create the space for their creativity and imagination to thrive. Fewer
resources force you to get creative, to learn to make something out of nothing, to problem solve.
These are the skills you want your child to develop. True intelligence is not the regurgitation of
information, true intelligence is about being able to think creatively and develop solutions. So like in
keeping with Whitman’s quote, be mindful of the objects you surround your child with. Stick with a few
simple, open-ended toys and watch them become what their imagination and spirit dictates.
I encourage you to realize that you have the power to create the optimum space and life you desire for you
and your family. Whatever resonates with you, it’s time to follow that calling. We are living in new times
and they require us to take new actions than before. Have courage and follow your heart!
http://www.mysticmamma.com/simplicity-parenting/