Nessa Willson
Pride, Prejudice, and Miscommunication
Jane Austen’s “Pride and Prejudice” is one of the great pieces of
literature that portrays the conflicts and barriers between people trying
to communicate several emotions: love, friendship, anger, and of
course, pride. Pride and Prejudice is a great example that shows how
these emotions, and how people attempt to resolve the conflicts
caused by them, affect communication within relationships. Each
couple portrayed in Austen’s novel, Fitzwilliam Darcy and Elizabeth
Bennet, Charles Bingley and Jane Bennet, even Elizabeth’s best friend,
Charlotte Lucas and Elizabeth’s cousin, Mr. Collins, all face obstacles
that hinder their relationships in one way or another (the two most
obvious being Elizabeth and Darcy, and Mr. Charles Bingley and Jane).
I will examine these relationships and analyze their communication
barriers and achievements from the latest version of the film Pride &
Prejudice (Focus Features, 2005).
A first time student researching the theories and concepts of
Communication Studies could find that this movie is a great way to
examine different communication styles and theories. In several parts
of this movie the audience is exposed to basic concepts that make up
the foundations for Communication studies, including theories and
concepts that help to define what communication is, and the different
ethics involved in interpreting communication,
The main idea in Pride and Prejudice is the communication
conflicts between Elizabeth and Darcy. A conflict is defined as
“occurring whenever two people have incompatible goals.” (Trenholm,
p. 164) In the movie there are two romantic conflicts: one between
Elizabeth “Lizzie” Bennet and Mr. Darcy, and one between Jane Bennet
and Mr. Charles Bingley. Lizzie and Darcy are the main characters in
this film, so I will examine their relationship and constraints first.
Both of Lizzie and Darcy are prideful (hence the title) about their
lives. Lizzie loves her family and wants the best for them; she is not
afraid to stand up and defend them should anyone stand in the way of
their happiness.
Darcy, on the other hand, is very proud as well. However, he
grew up with more wealth and more “class”; he is both educated and
worldly, having opportunities that the Bennets did not. His life
revolves around propriety, which, while Lizzie is a proper woman, her
family lacks, that would make them acceptable in the era and place in
which this film takes place (Georgian England).
Both Lizzie and Darcy are victims to their own prejudices (also,
hence the title). The communication that happen between Lizzie and
Darcy shows just how different they are: she pokes and prods at him,
while he tends to keep to himself. For example, during the ball that
Charles holds at his estate, when Lizzie and Darcy start dancing, after
commenting on the dance that she “loves,” she says “It is your turn to
say something, Mr. Darcy. I talked about the dance, now you ought to
remark on the size of the room or the number of couples.” When
Darcy asks what she would like to hear, she replies “That reply will do
for the present.” It appears that Lizzie takes joy in getting a rise out
of Darcy, one who she overheard insult her at their first meeting.
This example of what appears to be a one-sided
conversation between Lizzie and Darcy shows the clash of two different
people with two different mentalities: Lizzie, joyful and light, is
attempting to make the best of the situation, being the dance partner
of the stiff and confined Darcy. Examining their communication in this
scene, we see the two people trying to adapt to each other’s
communication styles: Lizzie is offering suggestions to Darcy as to
what to talk about, and Darcy is asking what she would like to hear.
The audience sees that the relationship between Lizzie and Darcy
starts off rocky. The conflict only worsens once Lizzie learns that
Darcy has prevented Bingley from proposing to Jane. While Darcy
believes that he has done so to prevent one of his closest friends from
entering into a disadvantageous marriage, Lizzie believes that Darcy
has prevented two people from being truly happy, based on a
stereotype. A stereotype is a “generalized second-hand belief that
provides conceptual biases from which we ‘make sense’ out of what
goes on around us, whether they are accurate or fit the circumstance”
(Trenholm, p. 356).
Darcy stereotypes Jane by thinking that Jane’s family, who are
not as rich or “accomplished” as the families whose company he is
most commonly found in, will not do well by his good friend. He fears
that a marriage between Jane and Bingley will be based on money,
because he does not feel that Jane shows enough interest in Bingley.
Darcy examines Jane’s nonverbal communication, and takes her
lack of communication a sign that she isn’t interested in Bingley.
Nonverbal communication is any “communication system that does
not involve words.” (Trenholm p. 107).
In one scene in the movie, when Charles holds the dance at
Netherfield, Charles and Jane are talking about horses, and when they
walk by you see Charles play with her dress without her knowing. This
nonverbal interaction lets the audience see that Charles is very
interested in Jane, admiring that which belongs to her, even
something as simple as a dress. You also see more nonverbal cues
from Charles when they are dancing, when they are talking, basically
any time that they are in the same vicinity. The way that he dotes on
her and acts when she is around lets the audience see that he sees her
as his one true love.
Jane on the other hand, is extremely shy, and it’s hard to tell
how she feels about Charles just from her facial displays and
responsiveness. During the scenes where we see Jane and Charles
interact, while Charles shows his affection rather obviously, Jane is
painfully shy and, as Lizzie states to Darcy when Darcy proposes to
Lizzie, “She (Jane) hardly shows her true feelings to me!” We see that
Jane tries hard not to communicate anything that can be taken as
malicious, and refuses to speak ill about anyone, even Caroline Bingley,
Charles’ sister, who so obviously does not approve of Jane being with
her brother.
The conflict that occurs between Jane and Charles is influenced
by Caroline Bingley and Darcy, who believe that Jane is unsuitable for
Charles to marry, due to her status. Caroline tells Charles after the
ball “You cannot be serious!” in regards to his feelings for Jane.
Charles then leaves Netherfield with Darcy and Caroline, hoping to
leave behind his feelings for Jane; however at the end of the movie we
see that he has had feelings for her all along, and in the end doesn’t
let his companions’ prejudices get in the way of what he wants, which
is to marry Jane.
Watching Lizzie speak with Charles, it appears that she shuts
herself down to her emotions: she shows polite interest, but seems
rather aloof to his intentions, and acts the same with the other men
that she dances with. Even Charlotte Lucas, Lizzie’s friend, comments
on how it does not appear that Jane is interested in him from the way
she behaves when he is in her presence: “Bingley likes her,
enormously, but might not do more if she does not help him on.”
Charlotte is stating that Jane needs to make an effort to show Bingley
that she is, in fact, interested in him, for her communication, both
verbal and nonverbal, alludes to nothing of that fact..
The larger romantic conflict is between Darcy and Lizzie. They
are both very proud people, and this pride gets in the way of their
ability to communicate to each other in an effective manner. Both
Darcy and Lizzie have problems with self-disclosure. Selfdisclosure is the voluntary revealing of information that would
normally be unobtainable (Trehnholm, p. 145).
There are two parts of the movie that stand out as being perfect
examples of self-disclosure. The first example is when Lizzie and Jane
are talking toward the end of the movie. Lizzie is telling Jane that she
has been a fool, and that she “has been so blind.” Though at that
moment she is not capable of telling Jane exactly why she has been so
blind, she eludes to the fact that she might not think that Mr. Darcy is
such a horrible man. This is the nicest thing that she has said about
Darcy (other than commenting that he has a handsome face while at
Pemberly), and anyone who knows her would think it rather odd for
her to say something pleasant about him. After Charles proposes to
Jane, when Lizzie and Jane are upstairs talking, Jane tells Lizzie that
she wishes there was “such a man [as Charles] for you [Lizzie.]” From
Lizzie’s facial expressions it appears that she is about to disclose
that there is, and that person is Darcy; however she then withdraws
from the situation by making a joke about Mr. Collins (her dreaded
cousin) having friends like him.
The next example of self-disclosure is when Darcy asks Lizzie
to marry him. At this point, Darcy has shown to the people around
him that he is completely uninterested in being with Lizzie, and that he
wants nothing to do with her (we the audience of course see it
differently). During this scene Darcy discloses that he is in love with
Lizzie, and wants to marry her. He faces ridicule and rejection, but is
taking the chance that Lizzie will set aside her past prejudices and
accept his offer.
Unfortunately for Darcy, his plan backfires when he admits that
he did indeed prevent Charles from proposing to Jane. This is where
listening starts to play a big part in the communicative conflicts
between Lizzie and Darcy. Listening is “the process of receiving,
constructing meaning from, and responding to spoken and/or
nonverbal messages” (Trenholm, p. 45). Darcy is trying to tell Lizzie
that he loves her, yet she doesn’t interpret his message in the
manner he wishes she would.
Understandable, Lizzie is only hearing how Darcy prevented her
sister from being happy; that he thinks she has an inferior family; and
that he is better for his rank and circumstance. He asks her to “end
his agony” and marry him. While she is hearing him, she isn’t
listening to what he is saying. He isn’t saying that he doesn’t think
she is good enough for him; he’s saying he doesn’t care that society
thinks that she isn’t good enough. He loves her, and he wants to be
with her; but what she is interpreting is that she isn’t good enough
to be with him.
At the end of the movie, this conflict is resolved in the most
ethical way. Trenholm states that while compromise, where each
party involved usually gives up part of what he or she wants, is often
used, it is not as effective as problem solving, because even in the
best compromise, both parties are somewhat unsatisfied (Trenholm, p.
165). Lizzie and Darcy don’t compromise their situation; they don’t
each give something of themselves up to make their situation work.
Instead, they discover that they were both being prideful toward one
another in a negative way. Once they started to actually listen to
each other the conflicts that they faced were resolved rather quickly.
Part of this resolve had to do with Darcy being a very generous man,
but then again, I am slightly biased toward that him.
Taking examples from Pride and Prejudice and applying the
concepts and ideas to real life can help one improve their
communication skills and perceptions. In the movie we see several
situations where, due to miscommunication, conflicts occurred that
could have been prevented if the parties involved has examined their
communication, rather than jumping to hasty conclusions. By applying
theories mentioned here, one can improve the qualities of relationships
between people.
Pride and Prejudice is one of my favorite movies: it touches on
family, society, and, of course, love. The relationship between Darcy
and Lizzie is one that is shrouded in miscommunication and errors of
the tongue, as well as the heart. These are the sources of the
conflicts in the film, and make the characters seem all too human:
each one has their faults and each one has their positive attributes.
Learning to work around society and it’s ideas of right and wrong are
what drive these two apart in the beginning, but bring them together
in the end.