Eulogy of Edward J Turi
"Death is the golden key that opens the palace of
eternity.” – John Milton
Christmas Eve 2012.
Ed Turi, 73, was found in his apartment that morning and
pronounced dead at 11:45 am. He was found by his friend
Scott. The Death Certificate states he died of cardiopulmonary arrest, congestive heart failure, and long term
coronary artery disease. The doctor thinks he died quickly
enough to feel little or no pain. These problems were far
more extensive than he let on to me previously. I also think
he died because of extreme stress and a sense of giving up.
His problems caught up with him, and he couldn't handle them.
Eulogy of Edward J Turi
8/05/1939 – 12/24/2012
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I'm writing this as his brother and executor. We lived many
miles apart and rarely saw each other---but we did spend time
on the telephone.
When Ed spoke to me of his health difficulties, he implied
they were of relatively minor importance---despite the pain
and breathing difficulties he told me he suffered. That was
like him. Ed was very private and kept much to himself. Too
much it seems. I think, to a certain extent, Ed was
embarrassed by his ill health and other problems, and he
didn’t want to talk about them.
He apologized to me as a brother and as a Turi for his legal
difficulties last year.
I have many good memories of Ed. And I'd rather dwell on
them than any of his problems. In the 1950s, Ed used to take
us siblings to the Orange County Fair during an afternoon
when kids were admitted free. Ed would keep us occupied
Eulogy of Edward J Turi
8/05/1939 – 12/24/2012
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until after five when Dad and Mom would arrive and we’d have
dinner at one of the Italian food tents and visit the exhibits
and ride the rides.
Dad, who was a member of a local baseball team in the 1930s
[the Hubbies], taught baseball to Ed. Ed taught me. And he
taught me our sibling mainstay: flies and grounders. [One
hitter and two fielders; first fielder to get three flies or five
grounders changed places with the hitter.] We three boys
played that on the St Joseph’s field---which was across the
street---night after night, even to the darkness. Ed was a
Yankee fan, but I forgave him and played ball anyway.
Complicating matters were the baseballs. Having little money
to spend on such things, we made them last---wrapping the
damaged and unraveling hulks with Dad’s sticky black, doublesided tape from his tool box. So, you can imagine our
difficulty with a black ball in the dark sticking to our hands all
Eulogy of Edward J Turi
8/05/1939 – 12/24/2012
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the time---but we plodded through these problems over the
years with no serious injuries.
Ed didn’t mind it, either. He kept hitting balls over the fence
into the back yards of Eldred Street homes---and then Jack
and I sat and talked while Ed walked around the block to the
back yard to recover the ball. Occasionaly, he took so long we
believed he had a girl friend there.
Sometimes he climbed the fence. It just depended on his
store of energy at the time. If we absolutely needed a new
ball, we searched the grass in the right field area [a steep
decline] for a few days and would often find a newer one
someone else lost. Then the cycle to black-taped-remnant
would start anew.
Sometimes, Ed and Jack played with Paul Cartman and Mickey
Kravack. Once it got dark, they’d congregate right across the
street at the fire hydrant.
Eulogy of Edward J Turi
8/05/1939 – 12/24/2012
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Ed had a habit of picking up little stones and hitting them in
the air with a bat. The main result was pitting marks all over
the meat of the bat to go with the marks from the black tape.
But on one night, the bat missed the stone and connected with
Mickey’s head. And Ed had a Babe Ruth 33oz bat! Mom fixed
Mickey up, and the stone hitting stopped---at least at the fire
hydrant talks.
During my high school years, Ed once volunteered to act as a
chaperone for one of my class trips---this one to Rye Playland.
Although he was friendly with all of us on the bus ride, we
didn’t see him at all during the day, which suited him and was
our idea of a good chaperoning.
I knew more about Ed in those days. He was a big fan of
Brenda Lee and Doris Day, which didn’t exactly match the
aloof aura he wished to project. In recent years he added
Hollie Steel, Jackie Evancho, and Celine Dione to his likes.
Eulogy of Edward J Turi
8/05/1939 – 12/24/2012
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On the political front, he indicated he was an Independent
with common sense. And he counted among his favorite
pundits and politicians: Rush Limbaugh, Glen Beck, Sean
Hannity, Michele Bachman, John Boehner and Martha
MacCallum. He was a patriotic soul who supported our troops,
Fox News, and Arizona in every way. That sounds more like a
Conservative.
Ed’s favorite quote was: “I limit myself to 1 drink a day. Right
now I am 5 months ahead.” He thought it was hilarious. His
second favorite was: "I'm going nucking futs!" He used both
as sign-offs on his emails.
He was a good poker player in our penny ante games with Vince
Smith and our Uncle Bill Stevens. And he was a worthy
Pinochle opponent. The two of us played plenty of that as well
as another card game, Casino.
He taught me hearts as well.
Eulogy of Edward J Turi
8/05/1939 – 12/24/2012
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In recent years, Ed played poker online, usually winning. But
the stakes were more akin to penny-ante based on the
winnings he told me about.
We played chess by mail when he was in the Air Force, but we
never finished a game. Procrastination on both our sides
usually destroyed the games in progress.
After retiring, Ed spent a great deal of time with his son,
Kevin. They both favored baseball and NASCAR, and they
traveled to many places across the Country and attended [and
Kevin participated successfully in] the local Special Olympics.
Ed’s at peace now, and all his problems are behind him. He was
something of a worry wart in his later years, but he refused
to follow instructions from his doctors and lawyers. He just
wouldn’t give up smoking or drinking---or anything else, though
he did it mostly at home.
Eulogy of Edward J Turi
8/05/1939 – 12/24/2012
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We talked a lot, and he listened to my suggestions---and then
often went out and did pretty much what he was going to do
anyway. I did my best, though I knew he’d possibly ignore me--in most cases, that is. I did succeed in a few.
I think I know about how all this fits in together. You see, Ed
very much hated having to live in Middletown [NY]. The only
thing keeping him here was the nearness of his son, Kevin. Ed
had a great love for his son, and Kevin returned it fivefold.
They had a strong relationship. And I think having Ed as his
father, gave Kevin more strength to deal with his personal
difficulties more easily.
Ed never explained his desire to leave Middletown, but I think
he wanted his last days to be somewhere not Middletown--where he grew up. He spent so much time in Europe and other
American States while in the Air Force, perhaps he just
Eulogy of Edward J Turi
8/05/1939 – 12/24/2012
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wanted to be somewhere like that again. He also wanted more
friends to be near.
As noted above, Ed and Kevin traveled to numerous places
around the Country during their vacations. Between the two,
they took numerous pictures, and Ed uploaded many of them
to various sites for everyone to see.
Ed rarely talked about his military career, but he did go back
to the Air Force after a one-year civilian layoff, and he
retired after twenty years total service between 1959 and
1980. He served at Lackland AFB; Keesler AFB; Travis AFB;
Sembach AB in Germany; Johnson Island in the Pacific; I think
the Kaiserslautern Army Unit in Germany as well; and others.
He retired as a Top Sergeant, after serving as an Automatic
Tracking Radar Technician and a Morse Systems Operator
over the years.
Eulogy of Edward J Turi
8/05/1939 – 12/24/2012
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I discovered Ed had earned a number of medals and honors
over his 20 years: Air Force Good Conduct Medal with 4
bronze loops; Small Arms Expert Marksmanship ribbon; Air
Force Longevity Service Ribbon with 4 Oak Leaf Clusters; Air
Force Outstanding Unit Award with 2 Devices; Army
Occupational Medal; and of course the National Defense
Service Medal.
Considering I know he used to raise hell when out on passes to
the local towns, I’m a little surprised at the Good Conduct
longevity. But, perhaps the stories I heard were wrong or
exaggerated. If Ed was honored, then Ed deserved the
recognition.
When I was first ill in the 1990s, my parents helped me
survive with moral and financial support. Ed---without being
asked---sent me money as well. He helped me get through the
worst time of my life, a time when my illness led to the loss of
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8/05/1939 – 12/24/2012
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all my assets and resources. I can thank Ed for his help in my
surviving until I could start turning things around.
Ed left a modest estate because of his one mistake, albeit a
major one. And he had to sell everything of value to pay for
his health and legal expenses. But don’t count Ed out. He left
his mark by serving honorably in the United States Air Force,
being a good brother, and assisting his parents and his
youngest brother in their times of need. This and his help for
his son all combine to make him a hero in my eyes. He has a
major place in my heart [despite his failings] along with Mom
and Dad.
"His wings are gray and trailing, Azrael, Angel of Death;
And yet the souls that Azrael brings Across the dark and cold,
Look up beneath those folded wings,
And find them lined with gold.”
- Robert Gilbert Welsh
Eulogy of Edward J Turi
8/05/1939 – 12/24/2012
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Ed will be missed very much. And he’ll remain in the memories
of many for a long time. Good-bye Ed. I love you.