Andrew Graham
English 100
9/29/07
Suck it up, be a man. If I had a nickel for every time I heard that I would be a
millionaire or even a billionaire. Where does this sense of attitude come from? Why is it
important for men to show that they are their masculine? What causes them to act that
way or are men really like that, and how have roles changed between men and women?
Why can’t men just be themselves? Rather it’s a macho man, an androgynous man, or
even a girlish man, it doesn’t matter. It is almost as if men are supposed to be robots,
programmed to never show emotion, be tough, and never show weaknesses.
Being an androgynous man is having both male and feminine characteristics;
which is a scary word for men to hear, androgynous. I freak out by the sound of the word
it makes it sound like your gay. Another word that scares men is femininity, which is the
quality of being feminine or womanly. Men are supposed to be tough and never show
signs of emotions. “In many ways American culture does little more for a man than
prepare him for modeling clothes in the L.L. Bean catalogue” (“Being a Man,” Theroux,
Paul). I grew up with three brothers and I was the youngest of the four boys. They always
seemed to be the roughest with me, and sometimes too rough. I would run into the house
crying and screaming to my mother because my brother’s were always bullying me
around. My brothers would just tell me to be a man, stop acting like a little girl; they
would never accept me unless I acted more like the macho man. This is the way men are
taught to act. It is taught to them when they are young to be macho or else they would be
considered gay.
Men show there masculinity so that they don’t get picked on, to show that they
are dominant and in control of the situation, to prove they are a man. “When I finished
Andrew Graham
English 100
9/29/07
the test, I was shocked to find that I was barely masculine at all” (“The Androgynous
Man,” Perrin, Noel). This is a slap to the face if you’re a man, not being masculine. It is
important for men to show that they are masculine; because that is the way they men are
raised; to be more superior then each other, and to be a tough guy. It separates the men
from the boys. Men also try to show their masculinity because they think women like that
bad boy image that portray from acting tough. I was dating a girl for the longest time. I
never acted tough or anything that a macho man would do, could say I was the
androgynous man. To make a long story short, she left me because she liked that bad boy
image. It just goes to shows that nice guys finish last, and guys act like macho jerks
because they get the girl. What is it about men that they have to show masculinity? Does
it really prove that they are a man? A man to me is someone that is willing to take
responsibility, and do anything for his family. That might mean having helping out
around the house and things need to be done. Rather it’s cooking dinner, help raising the
kids, or maybe even going to the grocery store to get food.
Men are stereotyped to be this macho man, when actually there is no actual
macho man. “The merely all-man man, for one thing, never walks to the grocery store
unless the little woman is away visiting her mother with the kids, or is in the hospital
having a kid, of there is no little woman. All-men men don’t know how to shop in a
grocery store unless it is to buy a 6-pack and some pretzels” (“The Appeal of the
Androgynous Man,” Gross, Amy). The man is supposed to bring home the income and
the wife is supposed to stay at home, raise the kids, cook the food, and get the groceries.
This is a stereotype because the man and women are equal partners. They both pitch in
Andrew Graham
English 100
9/29/07
the same amount. My mom and dad both work to bring in the income and they take turns
doing whatever needs to be done (rather it’s the dishes, cooking dinner, or cleaning the
house). I believe that everyone is androgynous, just some might be more masculine or
feminine than others.
In today’s society, the gender roles have changed. Females are no working and
supporting themselves. They don’t have to have a man to support them. “I would like to
go back to school so that I can become economically independent, support myself, and, if
need be, support those dependent upon me” (“I want a wife,” Brady, Judy). It used to be
that the men would work and bring in the income, but now it could be either or, if not
both. Women no longer have to wear dresses or skirts. Women wear pants just as guys.
“Men were straight-edged, sharply pronoged and formidable, women were softly curved
and held the food in a rounded well” (“Femininity,” Brownmiller, Susan). The typical
way men and women use to dress has completely changed; men are putting on makeup
and wearing girl pants. In my opinion the society has really take a shift for the worst
when it comes to the style of clothes men are wearing.
Men are human too. They are just like women; they change their minds a lot and
express themselves in many different ways. Men are raised to be tough and to be a mansman, but if it’s all broken down every man shares male and feminine characteristic. Men
act masculine because that is what they think they have to do to get what they want. In
the society men and women are treating each other as equals, as no one is superior over
each other. Both men and women bring in the income as before it was just men. Women
wear pants now as before a woman was never seen in pants.
Andrew Graham
English 100
9/29/07