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The National Strategies  Secondary
Key Stage 3 Literacy Plus
Literacy Plus unit
My character
In this unit, pupils compose their own personal web page* and invent and describe a
character for a comic book or an animated film or TV series. In doing so they build their
sentence writing skills. There are many opportunities planned into the lessons –
particularly in plenary sessions – for pupils to learn through talk and to practise their
speaking and listening skills.
*Essential to see teachers’ notes on personal web pages. The teachers’ notes follow the
lesson plans.
Literacy Plus W1
My character
Improving writing: sentences
Relevant to:
Functional English level 1 Writing L1.3 Write documents to communicate
information, ideas and opinions using formats and styles suitable for their
audience and purpose
Writing assessment focuses AF1, AF2, AF5
Framework strands
Unit objectives
7.2 Using and adapting the
conventions and forms of texts
on paper and on screen

8.2 Varying sentences and
punctuation for clarity and
effect


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draw on the
conventions of written
forms to plan writing
and develop ideas to
fit a specific task
use punctuation
accurately to clarify
meaning and create
effects in clauses,
sentences and when
writing speech
vary sentence length
and structure in
order to provide
appropriate detail,
make clear the
relationship between
ideas, and create
effects according to
task, purpose and
reader
Possible pupil targets
1. Plan and organise my
writing so that my
reader will be able to
follow it easily from
beginning to end
1. Join my ideas in
sentences using other
connectives as well as
and, but, then, so
2. Add detail and interest
to my sentences by
the words I use
3. Use complex
sentences in my
writing with a wider
range of connectives
4. Use adjectives and
adverbial words and
phrases to add detail,
interest and variety to
my writing
5. Vary my sentences in
length and structure
6. Use commas correctly
in long sentences
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The National Strategies  Secondary
Key Stage 3 Literacy Plus
Overview of lessons
Lesson 1
Introduce the theme of the unit and its objectives
2
Types of sentences
Simple sentences
Identify conventions of web page writing
Compound sentences
Collecting ideas for My page
Activities on connectives and complex sentences
Starter activity on connectives
Target setting
Drafting My page
Activities on varying sentences
Redrafting web page applying sentence variation
Starter activity on varying sentences
Introduce work on My character
Activity on sentence variation
Collecting ideas for My character writing
Drafting My character
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
Activity on use of commas
Applying new knowledge (commas, sentence variation) to redraft of writing
Starter activity: varying sentences and commas
Complete My character writing task – final draft
Share, publish, reflect, assess
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The National Strategies  Secondary
Key Stage 3 Literacy Plus
Lesson 1
My character
Lesson
objectives
Starter
10 minutes
 Engage pupils’ interest in the unit topic
 Ensure pupils understand unit learning objectives
What’s a sentence?
Use resource W1.1 or slide W1.1 for this activity.
Ask pupils, working in pairs, to decide which are sentences and which are not.
They must discover three features that are required for a group of words to be
a sentence. Lead a brief discussion of pupils’ ideas then list: starts with capital
letter, ends with full stop or equivalent, makes sense on its own.
Main
40 minutes
Introduction
Explain that this unit will teach pupils some important skills of sentence writing
and that they will use these skills to produce two things: a personal web page
and a cartoon character for a comic book story or animated film.
Show examples of personal web page (use slide W1.2 or own example) and
comic book/animated film character (use slides W1.3, 1.4 or own examples).
Allow paired discussion, then questions.
Introduce and explain the unit objectives, explaining while they are producing
their own work they will be learning to improve their sentence writing. Better
sentences will make their work more interesting.
Using resource W1.2, ask pupils to note down what they already know about
personal web pages and about aspects of sentences.
Development
Independent
Independent workers complete W1.2.
Guided
With teaching assistant (TA), work on the same task with
groups of pupils who require more support.
Individual support
Probably not required this lesson.
Plenary
10 minutes
Hear some feedback from individual pupils based on W1.2.
Invite reflections on what sentences are.
Ask pupils to discuss in pairs how sentences could make a difference to their
work in the unit and let some pupils share their ideas on this.
Resources: Interactive whiteboard (IWB)/flipchart; resources W1.1, W1.2, slides W1.1, W1.2,
W1.3, W1.4.
Suggested focus words:
capital letter, equivalent, cartoon, animated film; personal
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Lesson 2
Lesson
objectives
Starter
10 minutes
Main
40 minutes
The National Strategies  Secondary
Key Stage 3 Literacy Plus
Unit title: My character



To revise the distinguishing features of a sentence
To understand how punctuation affects meaning
To identify the main types of sentences – questions, statements and
commands – and to learn how to punctuate them correctly
 To understand the concept of simple sentences
Remind pupils of the sentences and non-sentences used in the previous
lesson. Ask pupils to identify the three common features that apply to
sentences.
Write sentence It’s not there on the board or use slide W1.5. Show pupils
how by changing intonation the sentence can be a statement, an exclamation
or a question. In pairs pupils work out their own example of a similar sentence
and a few perform them for the class.
Explain how, in writing, punctuation marks have to signal the intonation.
Introduction
1. Talk briefly about the different purpose of statements, questions and
exclamations and ensure the class knows the punctuation marks that should
be used at the end of each. Independent activity 1.
2. Using slide 1.1B or by writing on whiteboard, show pupils a number of
simple sentences and explain briefly what simple sentences are. (See
teachers’ notes on simple sentences if required.) Independent activity 2.
Development
Independent
Activity 1. Ask pupils in pairs to look at resource W1.3 or
slides 1.6A/B. Allow five minutes for them to decide which
of the sentences are questions, commands or statements
and make up one example of each sentence type
themselves.
Plenary
10 minutes
Activity 2. Ask pupils to write three simple sentences they
could use to introduce themselves on their web page.
Guided
TA supports one group of the least able writers to ensure
understanding and completion of the two tasks.
Individual support
Probably not required this lesson.
Ask pupils to look at the examples of writing using simple sentences on
resource W1.4 or slides W1.7A–D.
Ask pupils to talk in pairs about good features of simple sentences and less
good features. After a few minutes widen the discussion.
Record the outcomes of the discussion which should include:
 positive
 clarity of simple sentences (easy to read/understand)
 high impact (emphasis, suspense)
 negative
 too many simple sentences can make writing dull and repetitive.
Resources: IWB/flipchart; resources W1.3, W1.4, slides W1.1B, W1.5, W1.6A/B, W1.7A–D.
Suggested focus words:
Punctuate, intonation, statement, exclamation, question
Simple sentence, command
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The National Strategies  Secondary
Key Stage 3 Literacy Plus
Lesson 3
Unit title: My character
Lesson
objectives
Starter
10 minutes
 To identify the conventions of writing a personal web page
 To understand how simple sentences can be joined using and, but, or
Ask pupils to work in pairs. In five minutes they must write three facts about
themselves using three simple sentences. Next they swap with their partner,
read the sentences and check whether they are correct, simple sentences.
Main
40 minutes
Part 1
15 minutes
Part 2
25 minutes
Lead a brief class discussion of outcomes.
Introduction
1. Explain and demonstrate (e.g. slide W1.8) how simple sentences can be
joined using and, but, or to make compound sentences (see teachers’ notes if
required). Ask pupils to use these words to join the sentences they wrote
about themselves in the starter. Independent activity 1.
2. Using resource W1.5, slide W1.9 or similar, discuss with the class the
features of writing on personal web pages. Demonstrate how to annotate
features (slides W1.10A/B). Record the key points for future reference. (Refer
to teachers’ notes re features if required.)
Independent activity 2.
Development
Independent
Activity 1
Pupils use and, but, or to join their personal fact sentences.
Activity 2
Pupils read resources W1.6, slides W1.11A–C or similar.
In pairs, they annotate the sheets highlighting features of
the writing.
Guided
The TA works with target groups of pupils to ensure
effective completion of Activities 1 and 2.
Individual support
If required, TA can work with one or two individuals who
need support with reading the material independently.
Plenary
10 minutes
Select pupils to share the outcomes of their independent work. One or two
can read out their personal facts sentences that they have joined and say
what difference it has made. One or two can share how they have annotated
the web pages to show the features.
Resources: IWB/flipchart; resources W1.5, W1.6, slides W1.8, W1.9, W1.10A/B, W1.11A–C.
Suggested focus words:
Simple sentence, compound sentence, annotate, feature
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Lesson 4
Lesson
objectives
Starter
10 minutes
Main
40 minutes
Part 1
20 minutes
Part 2
20 minutes
The National Strategies  Secondary
Key Stage 3 Literacy Plus
Unit title: My character


To collect ideas for personal web pages
To understand the process of using connectives to make complex
sentences
Use resource W1.7 or slide W1.12. In pairs, one pupil takes simple
sentences with even numbers and one with odd. Taking it in turns to start they
must join their sentences using the three connectives at the top of the sheet.
Invite some pupils to say their sentences to the class. Draw out that they have
made compound sentences.
Introduction
1. Explain and demonstrate (e.g. slide W1.13) how complex sentences can
be made using conjunctions such as because, although, when, before, after,
that (see teachers’ notes if required). Ask pupils to do Independent activity 1
using resource W1.8.
2. Using resource W1.9 or similar, pupils collect ideas for their own web
pages.
Development
Independent
Activity 1
Pupils write their sentences and check with a partner that
they are complex sentences. In pairs they highlight the
clauses using one colour for main clause and one for
subordinate clause.
Activity 2
Pupils collect ideas for their personal web pages. Use
resource W1.9 or similar.
Guided
The TA works with target groups of pupils to ensure
effective completion of Activities 1 and 2.
Individual support
If required, TA can work with one or two individuals who
need support with generating ideas for their web page.
Plenary
10 minutes
Give pupils in their pairs a few minutes to reflect on what they have learned
about complex sentences. Ask for contributions. Use questions such as:
How are complex sentences different from simple sentences?
Why would you write complex sentences instead of simple sentences?
Resources: IWB/flipchart; resources W1.7, W1.8, W1.9, slides W1.12, W1.13.
Suggested focus words:
Connective, conjunction
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The National Strategies  Secondary
Key Stage 3 Literacy Plus
Lesson 5
Unit title: My character
Lesson
objectives
Starter
10 minutes
 To set writing targets
 To draft a personal web page using a range of sentences
Use slide W1.14 to show pupils the first few lines of ‘This is the house that
Jack built’ or use resource W1.10. Explain the clause structure. In pairs,
ask pupils to continue the alphabet sequence version of the poem as
shown on resource W1.10. After a short while, share the outcomes.
Introduction
Tell pupils that they are going to draft their personal web page in this
lesson using the ideas they have collected. Explain that as they are
working you and the TA are going to come around and set them individual
targets related to how they use sentences. Choose the targets from this
unit (see above) that are most appropriate for each pupil.
Main
40 minutes
Development
Independent
Ask pupils to work on their web pages using the ideas
they put on to the worksheet last lesson (W1.9).
Guided
Individual support
With TA, set targets with individual pupils.
Plenary
10 minutes
Select pupils to read out their web page draft and comment on their
sentences, or, if possible, ask some pupils to show their work on screen
and encourage other pupils to comment on the sentences.
Resources: IWB/flipchart; resources W1.9, W1.10, slide W1.14.
Suggested focus words:
Alphabet, clause, structure, draft, target
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The National Strategies  Secondary
Key Stage 3 Literacy Plus
Lesson 6
Unit title: My character
Lesson
objectives
Starter
10 minutes
 To understand how sentences can be varied
 To complete personal web pages
Use resource W1.11 or slide W1.15. Demonstrate the ‘Build a brother’ game,
and ask pupils to work in pairs to complete it. In a mini plenary, reflect on the
sentences in the answers identifying the conjunctions, main clauses and
subordinate clauses.
Introduction
Use slide W1.16 or similar to demonstrate how sentences can be varied by
changing the order of the clauses or by embedding a subordinate clause. See
teachers’ notes if required.
Main
40 minutes
Development
Independent
Activity 1
Using resource W1.12, ask pupils to work in pairs to liven
up the writing by changing the order of the clauses in
some of the sentences.
Activity 2
Pupils complete their personal web pages, possibly
redrafting some sentences by changing the order of the
clauses.
Guided
The TA works with target groups of pupils to ensure
effective completion of Activities 1 and 2.
Individual support
If required, TA can work with one or two individuals who
need support with completion of their writing.
Plenary
10 minutes
In pairs, encourage pupils to reflect on their web pages and review together
whether they have met their targets. After five minutes, ask several pairs to
share their reflections with the class.
Resources: IWB/flipchart; resources W1.11, W1.12, slides W1.15, W1.16.
Suggested focus words:
Main clause, subordinate clause, embed
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The National Strategies  Secondary
Key Stage 3 Literacy Plus
Lesson 7
Unit title: My character
Lesson
objectives
Starter
10 minutes
 To introduce the My character writing task
 To embed the idea of sentence variation
Play the human sentence game. Give a group of pupils some clauses written
on large sheets of paper together with some punctuation marks. See
resource W1.13 for ideas. They stand at the front of the class holding their
sheets up and other pupils instruct them to stand in a given order. When they
have made a sentence they are asked to move to make the sentence in
another way. Ask the class to reflect on the difference in the sentences and
how the impact they might have could change.
Introduction
Introduce to the pupils the idea that they are going to invent a character for
either a comic book or an animated film. In order to get a publisher or film
producer interested in the idea they will have to write a description of the
character (and they can draw it too if they wish).
Use a video clip from, for example The Simpsons to model how you might
justify why you like a character because of things they say and do. Ask pupils
to talk in pairs in the same way about their favourite characters from animation
or comic books for a few minutes and take feedback. Make sure the
discussion leads to the conclusion that these characters have an appearance
and other characteristics (e.g. super heroes with special powers) that define
them so a description will not just be about what they look like.
Development
Independent
Activity 1
Ask pupils to use resource W1.14 or similar to make notes
on the appearance and other characteristics of their own
favourite character from comics or animation.
Main
40 minutes
Part 1
25 minutes
Part 2
15 minutes
Activity 2
Encourage pupils share their work with a partner, helping
each other by suggesting additional details.
Guided
The TA works with target groups of pupils to ensure
effective completion of Activities 1 and 2.
Individual support
If required, TA can work with one or two individuals who
need support with using resource W1.14.
Plenary
10 minutes
Give pupils a few minutes to reflect on what makes characters in comics and
animations different from real people. Ask several pupils to talk about the
characters they have written about.
Resources: Interactive whiteboard (IWB)/flipchart; resources W1.13, W1.14.
Suggested focus words:
Vary, impact, publisher, film producer, character, characteristic
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The National Strategies  Secondary
Key Stage 3 Literacy Plus
Lesson 8
Unit title: My character
Lesson
objectives
Starter
10 minutes
 To gather ideas for the My character writing task
 To practice varying sentences
Ask pupils in pairs to rewrite a sentence in two different ways. For example:
I do my homework when I get in from school so that I can watch TV later.
Becomes:
When I get in from school, I do my homework so that I can watch TV later.
So that I can watch TV later, I do my homework when I get in from school.
Lead a brief discussion on the difference it makes.
Introduction
Using resource W1.15 or similar, model for pupils how you would make
improvements to the passage by changing the sentences. Model the first
paragraph, do the second as a shared writing exercise, ask pupils to do the
third paragraph independently as in Activity 1 below.
Main
40 minutes
Revisit resource W1.14 from the previous lesson. Ask pupils to use another
copy of the same resource to gather ideas for their own comic book or
animated character (Activity 2).
Development
Independent
Activity 1
Pupils use resource W1.15 and rewrite the last paragraph
by varying the sentences.
Activity 2
Pupils gather their ideas for writing using sheet W1.14 or
similar.
Guided
The TA works with target groups of pupils to ensure
effective completion of Activities 1 and 2.
Individual support
If required, TA can work with one or two individuals who
need support with using resource W1.14.
Plenary
10 minutes
Give pupils five minutes to discuss in pairs the importance of varying
sentences and make a note of the key points they have learned.
Pairs of pupils share ideas with full group and discuss.
Resources: Interactive whiteboard (IWB)/flipchart; resources W1.14, W1.15.
Suggested focus words:
Sentence variation, vary
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Lesson 9
Lesson
objectives
The National Strategies  Secondary
Key Stage 3 Literacy Plus
Unit title: My character


To write first draft of My character
To model conscious use of sentence variation
Starter
No starter in this lesson
Main
50 minutes
Introduction
Using slides W1.17A/B and resource W1.16 or similar material of your own,
model how you would begin to write about your character. Start using simple
repetitive sentences as in (a). With luck the pupils will point out your error.
Redraft as in (b) engaging the pupils in shared writing as you proceed. Ask
pupils to begin a first draft of their writing.
Development
Independent
Pupils work independently on writing about their characters.
Guided
The TA works for 20 minutes with a target group of pupils
who find it difficult to start a piece of writing.
Individual support
Following the guided work, the TA works with an individual
pupil who is struggling.
Plenary
10 minutes
Select one or two pupils to talk about the writing they have done so far. Ask
them to comment on how they have thought about sentences.
Resources: IWB/flipchart; resource W1.16, slides W1.17A/B.
Suggested focus words:
Repetitive, first draft, redraft
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The National Strategies  Secondary
Key Stage 3 Literacy Plus
Lesson 10
Unit title: My character
Lesson
objectives
Starter
10 minutes
 To learn about the use of commas in complex sentences
 Pupils to apply this knowledge to their own writing
Ask pupils to look at this sentence.
After they left Peter John and Matt ran on their backs bent became still at top
speed the leaders of the race and went on to win.
Ask them to work in pairs to make the sentence easier to understand by
putting in commas.
For example: After they left Peter, John and Matt ran on, their backs bent,
became, still at top speed, the leaders of the race, and went on to win.
Complete the session with the reflection that commas in longer sentences
help make the meaning clear to the reader.
Introduction
Using resource W1.17, slide W1.18A/B or similar, explain to pupils the use of
commas in long sentences. Next, use resource W1.18 to model adding
commas into a passage of writing (paragraph 1), use paragraph 2 for pupils to
try in a shared writing context and paragraph 3 for pupils to do independently.
See teachers’ notes if required.
Development
Independent
Activity 1
Pupils place commas in paragraph 3 of the passage from
resource W1.18.
Main
40 minutes
Activity 2
Pupils work in pairs to ensure correct placement of
commas in their own first draft of My character writing.
Guided
The TA works for 20 minutes with a target group of pupils
who find it difficult to start a piece of writing.
Individual support
Following the guided work, the TA works with an
individual pupil who is struggling.
Plenary
10 minutes
Select one or two pupils to talk about the writing they have done so far. Ask
them to comment on how they have thought about sentences.
Resources: IWB/flipchart; resources W1.17, W1.18, slides W1.18A/B.
Suggested focus words:
Comma, placement,
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Lesson 11
Lesson
objectives
Starter
10 minutes
Main
40 minutes
The National Strategies  Secondary
Key Stage 3 Literacy Plus
Unit title: My character

Apply new skills in writing final draft of My character
Using resource W1.19, pupils work in pairs to match examples to the rules for
use of commas.
Introduction
Encourage pupils to complete final drafts of their writing about the comic book
or animated film character.
Development
Independent
Activity 1
Final draft writing.
Activity 2
In pairs, pupils read and assess each other’s work. They
look particularly for the achievement of curricular targets
and the learning objectives for this unit.
Guided
During Activity 2, the TA supports one group of pupils who
find it hard to work cooperatively with the peer-assessment
task.
Individual support
During Activity 1, the TA works with two individual pupils
who are struggling to complete their writing.
Plenary
10 minutes
During the lesson, circulate to gather information on the outcomes of the work.
In the plenary, lead a whole-class discussion in which pupils are led to reflect
on successful outcomes and what they have learned along the way.
Resources: IWB/flipchart; resource W1.19.
Suggested focus words:
Assessment, punctuation rules
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Lesson 12
Lesson
objectives
Starter
10 minutes
Main
40 minutes
The National Strategies  Secondary
Key Stage 3 Literacy Plus
Unit title: My character

To share, publish, reflect on and assess writing and progress to
targets
No starter in this lesson.
Introduction
Explain to pupils that you want to spend about half the lesson giving time
for some pupils to finish their work while others work on displaying their
finished writing.
In the second half the time will be spent with all the pupils sharing work and
celebrating successful outcomes.
Development
Independent
Activity 1
Completion of written work.
Activity 2
Preparing work for display. Reading the work of other
pupils.
Activity 3
Pupils share and celebrate their work.
Guided
Individual support
TA supports individuals with display of work.
Plenary
10 minutes
Activity to reflect on the unit targets and objectives and the extent to which
they have been met.
Resources:
Suggested focus words:
Display, celebrate
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The National Strategies  Secondary
Key Stage 3 Literacy Plus
My character unit
Teachers’ notes
These notes are designed as background for the teacher. They are not designed for
direct use with pupils.
Personal web pages
Many of your pupils will already have personal websites; Bebo is the site that is probably
most popular with younger people. There are, however, risks associated with the use of
these sites and this is why it is unlikely that your school network will allow access to
them.
The purpose of this unit is not to encourage pupils to set up their own personal web
pages, but to build their writing skills. It is essential that you warn pupils that if they do
set up a web page they should set it up so that they control who has access.
What is a sentence?
A sentence could be defined as:





a group of words that tell you something
a grammatical structure that begins with a capital letter and ends
with a full stop
a grammatical structure that must contain a main verb
a group of words that stands on its own and makes sense
a statement, question or a command.
Major and minor sentences
There are two forms of sentence: the major sentence and the minor
sentence.
The major sentence is by far the most common. Major sentences are
what have been traditionally considered to be complete sentences and
are found in many written texts, particularly formal ones. For example:
I eat chips with my dinner.
The central defender passed the ball back to the goalkeeper.
These sentences contain elements that form common patterns of
language.
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Key Stage 3 Literacy Plus
Minor sentences do not have a finite verb but are, nevertheless, deemed
sentences. They make sense by themselves, but may be more context
dependent than major sentences. For example:
For sale.
Bikes for hire!
No hawkers.
Foot and mouth!
Overhead cables.
‘No!’
‘Bye.’
‘Going out?’
Such sentences are usually found on signs, as headings or in
conversations or narratives.
Sentence types
There are four types of sentence.
Statements or declarative sentences
Most sentences are declarative which means their subject comes before
the verb. They generally end with a full stop, but the punctuation can
vary according to how they are used. For example:
I am going shopping.
You’re really going shopping this time?
I can’t believe that you’re going shopping at this time of night!
Interrogative sentences (questions)
These seek information and look for answers. They usually end with a
question mark.
They can be classified into two types.
1.So-called ‘wh-’ questions which begin with an interrogative word like
what, who, why or where. For example:
Why does the tide ebb and flow?
Where are the scissors?
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Key Stage 3 Literacy Plus
Who is on duty?
2 Questions which usually seek a yes or no answer. These do not use an
interrogative word, but show the subject coming after the first verb,
which is an auxiliary, for example:
It is raining. (statement)
Is it raining? (question)
If there is no auxiliary in the statement, then the dummy auxiliary do is
introduced to form the question, for example:
He likes cake.
Does he like cake?
Alternative interrogatives are like yes or no questions, but they contain
alternative answers linked by or. For example:
Was it a boy or a girl?
Do you want tea or coffee?
We sometimes ask questions by adding a small interrogative structure to
the end of a declarative or imperative one. These are known as tag
questions, for example:
She is coming to the party, isn’t she?
She lives next door, doesn’t she?
Be careful, won’t you?
Tag questions allow us to make very subtle contrasts in meaning by
varying the choice between positive and negative and varying the
intonation.
Your name is Jack, isn’t it?
Your name is Jack, is it?
Be quiet, will you?
Sit down, won’t you?
Although phrased as questions, the last two may well carry the force of a command. .
Exclamations or exclamatory sentences
These start with what or how and express strong feelings, sometimes
shock, horror or surprise. They generally end with an exclamation mark,
for example:
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What a terrible mess you’ve made of that!
How I long to see her again!
Commands or imperative sentences
These generally convey instructions, for example:
Go to your room, instantly!
Strain the sauce carefully.
Don’t do that!
Please don’t do that.
Simple, compound and complex sentences
Defining sentences is tricky but for the purpose of teaching Literacy Plus target pupils
these definitions will suffice:
Simple sentence
A sentence with one main clause only. In traditional grammar, a clause always has a
verb. For example:
I ran all the way to work.
Compound sentence
A sentence with two or more clauses linked by and, but, or. In compound sentences
each clause could stand alone as a simple sentence. For example: I ran all the way to
work and I ran all the way home.
Complex sentence
A sentence with two or more clauses. It has a main clause and one or more clauses
(subordinate clauses) that are dependent on it and cannot stand alone. For example:
I ran all the way to work because I wanted to get fit.
Although I was tired, I ran all the way to work.
In the examples the subordinate clause is highlighted.
Conjunctions
Conjunctions are a subset of connectives.
1. Conjunctions may link, for example, two nouns or adjectives:
I ate fish and chips.
The flag is red and green.
2. A conjunction may link clauses or parts of clauses within a sentence.
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There are two ways in which this can be done: through coordination or
subordination.
Common coordinating conjunctions are and, but, or. These join
(and are placed between) clauses of equal weight. For example:
It was raining, but it wasn’t cold.
They took a taxi and went to the station.
Subordinating conjunctions such as when, while, before, after, since, until, if, because,
although and that are placed at the beginning of a subordinate clause.
Personal web page features
Notes for resource W1.5
Typical text features
About me
My name is Voltz! Yes, that is my
real name in case you were
wondering. I come from
Swindon. I’ve lived there all my
life and, say what you like, I think
it’s a great place. I still want to go
travelling though because I want
to see the world – particularly
China because there are some
really cool places there like the
Great Wall.
People say I’m lazy but
hyperactive, clever but mad, fit
but fat, happy but sad, and I say
– Hey what do they know? I do
school for a living but that can’t
last forever can it?
I like anything with wheels: cars,
bikes, tractors, skateboards,
roller blades. OK, I draw the line
at lawnmowers, but you could
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Simple sentences make a strong
impact.
Informal style – like speech. Use of
contractions such as I’ve.
Short paragraphs for different aspects.
Complex sentence to add interest.
List of adjectives or other words is
common in web pages like this.
Another list.
Informal vocabulary such as OK.
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take the engine out and then…
I’ve got quite a few friends. Most
of them go to my school and you
can see a few photos of them
further down. Horror show! But
they are all great really.
Attempts at humour.
Model for redrafting story start
Notes for resource W1.15
Note: The suggested commentary to use as you write is in italic script.
The actual words to write are in normal font. The complete text is at the end, so you can
see it as a whole.
I am going to leave the first sentence as it is, as I want to be clear about the time, i.e.
when the moon went down, so the reader knows I am talking about a particular time very
late at night, almost at dawn. That makes it sound more scary because nobody would be
around at that time. I need to keep the comma separating the subordinate clause from
the main clause.
When the moon went down, the garage door creaked open.
I stood still, listening carefully. Something rustled in the darkness.
I decided to begin with a main clause and then changed the subordinate clause with a
conjunction to one without, to maintain pace and interest. I then used a simple sentence
because I wanted the sound to stand alone: it makes it scary; the reader wants to know
what it is.
I now want to change when to a different conjunction because I’ve used it once. I think
I’ll use as because I want to give the impression that I am seeing nothing at the same
time as I am staring. I’ll leave the rest, as I am happy with it.
As I stared, I could see nothing beyond the vague shapes of old boxes and cartons piled
high.
I haven’t used although before, so I’ll leave the next sentence as it is. I need to
remember my comma again after the subordinate clause.
Although it was warm in the doorway, there was a musty smell.
Complete text
When the moon went down, the garage door creaked open.
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I stood still, listening carefully. Something rustled in the darkness. As I stared, I could
see nothing beyond the vague shapes of old boxes and cartons piled high. Although it
was warm in the doorway, there was a musty smell.
Use of commas
Notes for lesson 10
As soon as he was given the bone, (subclause comes first, so comma required to
separate from main clause) Patch buried it.
He always did this because he was frightened that next door’s dog, who’s a bit of a
bruiser, (additional information which can be removed without affecting meaning) would
steal it. However much we tried to stop him, (as first example) he always buried bones in
the flowerbed. We tried to persuade him to use the bit of ground behind the compost
heap, (comma to separate items in a list) the bare patch by the shed or the edge of the
path, (comma before but) but he would have none of it.
For some reason Patch also liked silver paper, (list: discuss what happens if a comma is
placed between silver and paper and paper and bags) paper bags and bits of string.
However, (comma to separate however from the rest of the sentence, as it is a
connective operating between sentences. This is different to the use of however above,
where it is used within the one sentence) he didn’t bury these, (comma before but as
above) but preferred to pile them up in his bed. When Mum removed them, (comma to
separate subclause from main clause) he sulked for days. He was never put off,
(commas round connective that links across the sentence and round something that can
be removed from the sentence) though.
He just went round the house and garden looking for more.
When our neighbour’s dog, called Charlie, (additional information in the sentence which
can be taken out) came into our house, (to separate subclause from main clause) he lay
down on our dog’s bed and ate a paper (discuss why a comma would be inappropriate
here) bag and two bits of string. Our dog went mad, (list) growled at his enemy, barked
loudly, (before but) but the neighbour’s dog just growled back. Mum chased Charlie out
of the house, in the end, (additional information) with the sweeping brush.
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