Holly Silberman
Professor Chu
October 6, 2005
Family and the Individual Identity Formation
Family and identity, although not synonymous, can be placed in the same
category, because one cannot be complete without the other. More specifically, an
individual’s identity is molded by their family and the family relations are created in
accordance with the individual members’ personalities. However, in terms of bones,
blood and paper, how are these personal constructs created? According to Leila, the
character and narrator of Fae Myenne Ng’s novel, Bone, each of these three constructs
play a significant role in the formation of family and therefore identity. By exploring the
legal system, as well as her own sensitivities and those of her family members including
their “oldtimer wisdom,” Leila narrates her concepts to us. Leila’s thoughts are often
clarified through stories concerning her step father, tales that involve bones as a means to
explore our heritage; paper, which seems to be the most important; and blood, the genetic
link of family as a binding force that is not always necessary but still an essential part in
the discovery of herself and her family.
The title of the book, Bone, offers insight into one paramount part of family and
identity formation. The bones of ancestors are a constant reminder of our roots, and the
realization of the importance of the history of our ancestors. Since personal heritage and
history are integral factors of how we act and behave in our present lives, it is no surprise
that the books characters must interact with and speak about these lasting objects that
mark life after it is over, their ancestors bones. Leila’s step father, Leon, has a long
standing superstition concerning the bones of his “paper” father, Grandpa Leong. This
uneasiness stems from a failed promise to return Grandpa Leong’s bones to China for
burial, creating an excuse for all of Leon’s failures. “Of more consequence was the
promise to send Grandpa Leong’s bones back to China…Leon worried about the restless
bones, and for years, whenever something went wrong—losing a job, losing the bid for
the takeout joint, losing the Ong and Leong Laundry—Leon blamed the bones” (Ng 50).
In Leon’s mind and in the eyes of his stepdaughter, Leila, his identity and position in
society are both based on the bones of Grandpa Leong and their implications of family
responsibility deserving of punishment if not carried out. However, the bones do not
serve only as a reminder of Leon’s failures to follow through on a promise, they can also
be seen as a gateway into his past which helped to shape who he is today. Because the
bones belong to Grandpa Leong who granted Leon access into the country, they allow the
reader to travel back with Leon and explore the time of his arrival to America and his
troubles with paper credentials.
Paper, therefore, becomes another entity in the formation of family and personal
identity. In regards to Leon, his entire identity in America is based on the information
sold to him for access into the country and the ensuing forms and documents that he
saved. Due to the strict laws against Chinese emigration, it was necessary for Leon to
have documents detailing him as a returning citizen to America which he purchased from
Grandpa Leong. At some point in time, Leon begins to lose a sense of who he is
compared to the paper trail that he has gathered, “Leon was always getting his real and
paper birthdates mixed up; he’s never given the same birthdate twice. Oldtimer logic: If
you don’t tell the truth you’ll never get caught in a lie” (Ng 55). Since Leon seems to
have confused an exact idea of his history, he must depend on paper documents to re-
establish himself in a legal sense. This troubles him greatly when he goes to collect social
security and must prove his identity through a certified document. In this way, paper is
the only plausible way for Leon to reassert his identity, even if the documents are fake,
they are the only things Leon has to go by. Leila, who accompanies him to the
government office, must help Leon recover his past, or at least a manuscript that will
manufacture a paper past and allow him access to the social security funds.
Leila, in search of certain credentials that can help Leon in his social security
case, delights in finding that he has millions of papers saved of his true life that can give
her insight into his past. Reading these papers, for Leila, is a means of defining who her
stepfather is, as she equates what is written to who he is today, “Maybe Leon should have
destroyed these papers. They held a truth about Leon I wasn’t sure I wanted to know”
(Ng 58). It is as if Leila figures that what she has seen written regarding Leon must be
the truth about who her step father is, and she does not like what she sees. Leila is
asserting that to her paper is law and that what is written constitutes a person’s identity.
In fact it appears that she has obtained this notion from Leon himself, “And this paper
son saved every single scrap of paper. I remember his telling me about a tradition of
honoring paper, how the oldtimers believed all writing was sacred” (Ng 58). Therefore
Leon’s identity in Leila’s eyes is formed by a specific paper construct that her family had
created, one that was perpetuated by Leila’s relations with her real father.
When Leila’s biological father abandoned her and her mother, her only
communication with him was through a letter correspondence. In this regard, her concept
of her true family and heritage is necessarily centered on the use of paper. “I’ve never
seen him…I’ve seen his picture and read his letters. I know him by the name he used in
his letters. ‘Your father, Fu Lyman’” (Ng 187). She therefore equated the concept of
family with paper because for so many years, before the arrival of her step father, her
only means of communicating with the dominant male figure in her life was through
writing. Even the name of her biological father, which she had kept for so many years,
haunted her and only through the use of a legal document, in this case a marriage
certificate, was she able to let go of his name, “For me, the one good thing about getting
married was that I was finally rid of my real father’s name, Fu” (Ng 18). Leila finds a
legal document as the only way to move on from her abandonment by her father that has
shaped her identity and consequently her actions and decisions of today, especially
concerning the men in her life. However, Fu Lyman was still, by blood, her father and
therefore she felt a strong connection with him, yet Leon’s integration into her life,
despite the lacking of biological ties allows more insight into what she feels constitutes a
family.
Some people may assume that the most binding aspect of relations is the fact that
they are connected by blood. However, when Leila speaks of her step father, she
obviously feels he is part of her family and that sharing of blood is necessary when
defining family, “He’s not my real father, but he’s the one who’s been there for me. Like
he always told me, it’s time that makes a family, not just blood” (Ng 3). Leila has spent
the majority of her life with Leon as the only “real life” masculine paternal figure;
therefore, she considers him to be a surrogate father bypassing the need of family to be
genetically related. This does not necessarily seem to be the same feelings of the other
members of Chinatown. When Leila’s mother, Mah, becomes upset at the death of
Grandpa Leong, or Leon’s “paper father” the fellow workers at her sewing shop comfort
her by saying, “’Loosen your heart from the matter. He’s not your father, he’s not a
blood relation. You’re just doing what a good person should’” (Ng 81). Even though her
coworkers urge her to not take it personally, as only real family matters, it is obvious that
Mah values Grandpa Leong despite his lack of actual blood relation. The absence of
actual genetic connections, in this case, is an important example of the forming of
families beyond the traditional concepts of family as blood only. It is clear that the true
Leong family has been formed without blood, but is instead based on other, less tangible
ideals such as trust, and compassion forged over time.
“Blood and Bones. The oldtimers believed that the blood came from the mother
and the bones from the father” (Ng 104). Fae Myenne Ng includes this anecdote in her
novel, yet the narrator, Leila does not see herself and family in this manner. Although
she can learn much about her heritage through these two pathways, and does ascribe them
a vast importance, it seems as though paper is the most concrete way for Leila to
establish identity in herself and others. Perhaps it is because of the legality that is
associated with certain documents, or the seeming finality of the written word, whatever
the case is, there is definite emphasis placed on manuscripts. Leila, however, does not
place total importance on the idea of paper. Bones do allow Leila to resurrect the past
and discover how that fits into her present life, and blood in a contradictory manner
allows Leila to realize what it means to truly be family. Besides the concepts of paper,
blood and bone, Leila is also willing to go beyond the elucidated constructs, and place
emphasis on her own emotions for defining family and herself. She considers feelings of
love built over time towards family members, genetically linked or not, instrumental in
binding her to them and a way of creating herself. Leila and the reader come to realize the
many constructs and nuances essential to appreciate the forming of family ties, heritage
and self identity.