Dilemmas Thinking
Dilemmas Thinking – Creating a Context for our Conversations
about the Normal Muddle
By Geoff Ball, ghball@aol.com
Strategic planning and collaborative problem solving are
powerful ways to focus and structure conversations among diverse
people.
There exists a complementary way of framing our conversations that
creates an inclusive context and challenges us to retain connections
between 'opposites.'
Dilemmas Thinking is a complementary way of viewing the world. It
goes mostly by three names - Dilemmas Thinking, Paradoxical
Thinking, and Polarity Management. And, it has also gone, most
famously, by “Yin & Yang.” In this note we'll use "Dilemmas."
Using Dilemmas Thinking enables us to hold two logical opposites in
our minds and to continue to function. We avoid the "Tyranny of
'OR'" and instead find "The Magic of 'AND'."1
The 'Normal Muddle'
Everyday we are facing a confusing muddle of connections among
ideas. This is the 'normal muddle.' It's hard to organize ourselves to
get things done, to change the current situation to make it more what
we want, to become of one mind. We are teased by the muddle into
organizing our thinking around one pole or one goal. And we organize
ourselves into interest groups or parties and advocate for one goal
with associated strategies and tactics. Sometimes - like between
sales and engineering, or between husband and wife, or between
farmers and city dwellers, the sides polarize, the arguments for the
'other side' are demeaned, the issue become moral and the other
side becomes 'evil.' It becomes really hard to hear what is important
and valuable in what the other side is saying. Being on the winning
side has rewards that make listening for the other's truth even harder.
1
Collins and Porras, Built to Last, 1994, Harper Business, pp. 43-45. They point
out the power of this approach – they found that their best companies were able
to enhance both sides of the dilemmas that they identified in their research.
These companies went beyond ‘balancing’ both sides.
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Dilemmas Thinking
Consider the progression in the following diagram...
The 'normal muddle' consists of all kinds of ideas and perspectives
and preferences held by many kinds of people. To cope with this
complexity we create frameworks and templates thru which we view
the muddle. Over time people sharing the same perspectives and
interests coalesce into proponents who then advocate and debate the
singular importance of their own chosen perspective. Much of our
organizational and political life is organized this way. Sometimes it
works well. At other times the limitation of our thinking to either/or
choices leads to unwanted consequences - the company goes out of
business, husband and wife cite irreconcilable differences in their
divorce, and there is not sufficient water for both farmers and city
dwellers so one of them takes a hit.
The unwanted consequences from either /or thinking in dealing with
a dilemma can sometimes be so severe that the 'winning' side and
the losing side seek new ways to handle the conflict - they seek to
find a balance between their interests, they negotiate a compromise,
and life goes on. In future disputes 'balance' among the parties
becomes the sine qua non of agreement. What often fails to
happen, however, is more robust collaboration that could lead to
more creative approaches. Such integrated conversations can
allow the parties to manage the dilemma.
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Dilemmas Thinking
When parties realize that they are engaged in managing a dilemma,
there is a chance that they may find a way to have a robust
conversation. They look more deeply at the underlying connections
between the "two halves of a whole." The recognition that they are
dealing with a dilemma allows conversations in which the actions
advocated by each party can be formed into an integrated approach
in the context of the whole. Often, this includes ideas that only
surface when the goals of both sides are held in everyone's mind at
the same time. The desired result from the conversation is to
optimize performance relative to A and to B. This takes into account
the cross-connections and interactions between A and B. In the
diagram the robust both/and icon illustrates this desired performance
outcome as being the star in the 'upper right hand corner.’
In what follows we will provide some common examples of dilemmas,
make them specific, and suggest how people can work together to
manage robust both-and conversations.
Before we go into the details of dilemmas it is important to point out
that not all conflicts are the results of dilemmas. In many, perhaps
most, situations problem solving and strategic planning retain their
importance. We are suggesting that we pay more attention to
identifying those situations where the Dilemmas Thinking approach
results in better outcomes for all.
To achieve robust positive results with dilemmas requires managing
the dilemma against indicators of poor performance on either goal
and with respect to the overall purpose.
Identifying Dilemmas
Dilemmas often appear to be separate independent goals that can be
problem solved independently; for example, consider these goals:
Safety
Short Term Returns
Maintaining Traditions
Long Term Returns
Crusading for Innovation in an organization
Growth in a child's Capability
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Dilemmas Thinking
By treating each goal as distinct and independent we can use
the problem solving approaches we've been learning all our
lives - which is one reason it is sometimes challenging to
manage dilemmas. We use a thinking approach that ignores the
other connected goal.
Dilemmas Thinking views the pair of two goals as two halves of a
whole with a purpose for the pair taken together.
In Dilemmas Thinking we seek approaches that advance the
purpose of the whole (and of both halves). We must keep the whole
and its two halves in mind as we manage the dilemma. For example,
consider these pairings:
 Safety AND Learning & Growth in Capability (Parenting a
child).
 Maintaining Traditions AND Crusading for Innovation
(Managing an organization).
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Dilemmas Thinking
 Short Term AND Long Term (Use of resources in a community)
When we look carefully at each pairing we see that there are
connections from each half to the other half making it essential that
we keep both halves in mind if we wish to manage the dilemma for
greatest effectiveness. Consider the first of these dilemmas:
Safety AND Learning & Growth: As the child gets older she or he is
placed in safe-enough environments that are challenging. The learner
has training wheels on the bike and the parent along side. You start
near the bottom on steep hills and learn how to descend with
gradually increasing speed and maneuvering difficulty.
For a child to grow in understanding and capability they need to be
challenged. For the child to be safe in these situations they need to
be ones in which the child’s capability is sufficient. A child cannot be
kept safe if, as they get older, their capabilities are not developed so
they are able to act with safety in more complex situations. Growth is
unlikely without some level of risk.
Dilemmas Thinking offers a framework, mindset and processes for
those who find themselves in dilemmas-generated conflict, each
'taking sides' for one half of the whole. By validating that each half of
the whole is essential to the other half it becomes possible to have
deeper more robust conversations that uncover more powerful ways
to manage the dilemma. Dilemmas Thinking works in organizations,
families and communities.
Managing Dilemmas
Barry Johnson's Polarity Management approach offers a website
(polaritymanagement.com) full of helpful ideas including a template
we can use to good advantage. The following is quoted from Polarity
Management, A Summary Introduction, Barry Johnson, September
1998. He prefers the “Polarity” to “Dilemma.”2
2
See also his new website and organization www.polaritypartnerships.com.
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Dilemmas Thinking
“Breathing as a metaphor for all Polarities
Life
Aerobic Efficiency
Get Oxygen
Clean Out Carbon Dioxide
Inhale
Exhale
Too Little Oxygen
Too Much Carbon Dioxide
Aerobic Inefficiency
Death
Polarity Management Map
1. Breathing is a handy way to summarize and remember how all polarities look
(their structure) and how they all work (their dynamics). Knowing how they
look can help you identify what is missing when you are exploring a difficult
polarity issue. Having all 8 pieces to the puzzle can help you see the whole
picture. Knowing how they work can help you strategically plan actions and
anticipate outcomes.
2. Structure - How Polarities Look. There are 8 pieces to the “map.”

Two “neutral” boxes, at either end of the central, horizontal axis (Inhale
and Exhale).

Two “upside” boxes above the neutral names in which you put the positive
results of focusing on each of the poles (The positive result of Inhaling is
you Get Oxygen. The positive result of Exhaling is you Clean Out Carbon
Dioxide.)

Two “downside” boxes below the neutral names in which you put the
negative results of over-focusing on one pole to the neglect of the other.
(The negative result of focusing on Inhaling to the neglect of Exhaling is
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Dilemmas Thinking
Too Much Carbon Dioxide. The negative result of over-focusing on
Exhaling to the neglect of Inhaling is Too Little Oxygen).

The box on top is for the Higher Purpose. This contains the answer to the
question, “Why invest in managing this polarity?” The answer goes
beyond getting the upside of each pole. With breathing, one answer could
be to improve Aerobic Efficiency. Another, more basic purpose could be
Life itself.

The box on the bottom is for the Deeper Fear. This is usually the opposite
of the Higher Purpose and represents the worst case situation if the
problem is not managed. With breathing, one answer could be Aerobic
Inefficiency. A more extreme consequence would be Death.
3. Dynamics – How Polarities Work. If you follow your own breathing process
and read through the four large quadrants, you will be able to experience the
normal flow of all polarities.
A. Inhale deeply and hold your breath. Notice how it feels good at first as
you get fresh oxygen.
B. As you hold your breath, you quickly start to experience the downside
of inhaling alone = too much carbon dioxide. The longer you hold your
inhalation, the more attractive exhaling becomes. So you
C. Exhale to get rid of the CO2 and it feels good – at first.
D. But, as you hold your breath, you quickly start to experience the
downside of exhaling alone = a lack of oxygen.
4. Organization Application. The breathing metaphor may seem simple and
obvious, and it is. That is its beauty. Let’s substitute centralization for inhaling
and decentralization for exhaling and then think about multi-million dollar
fights over which is the best strategy for the future. Inhaling and exhaling are
a polarity to manage. It has 2 right answers, which are interdependent. You
cannot choose inhaling as the one right answer (either/or thinking) and be
successful over time. You must choose both and capitalize on each.
The same is true of centralization and decentralization. They are a polarity to
manage and either/or thinking alone will only create unnecessary confusion,
conflict, and resistance. No matter which side “wins” in a power struggle
between them, the organization will loose.
Breathing as a metaphor for all Polarities - Summary

There are 8 parts to the Polarity Map. It is helpful to see the “whole
picture.”

There is a natural flow from the downside of one pole to the upside of the
other. After moving into the upside of the opposite pole the system, over
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Dilemmas Thinking
time, will reach its limits and move toward the downside of that pole. This
creates natural pressure to self-correct by moving to the upside of the
original pole. This flow looks like an infinity loop, which is a helpful symbol
because polarities are ongoing. To “solve” them is to learn how to manage
them well over time.
There are two forces contributing to the shift from one pole to the
other: the increased pressure from the downside of one pole and the
increased attractiveness of the upside of the opposite pole. For
example, Inhale and hold your breath. The longer you hold your
breath, the greater the pressure from the downside of inhaling and
the more attractive exhaling becomes. The more an organization has
focused on centralization for a long period of time, the greater will be
the pressure to decentralize and the more attractive will be the
benefits of decentralization.”
****
On the following page we show a filled out Stability AND Change
Polarity Map from the Polarity Management website. You don’t need
to memorize it – read it over – remember that the flow in real life
tends to be in the infinity loop he mentioned above.
Barry Johnson does lay out Tradition-bearing AND Crusading in a
polarity map in his book, Polarity Management.
Barry Johnson has formed a new organization. You can find all about
it at http://www.polaritypartnerships.com/
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Dilemmas Thinking
Built to Last
Be clear about the core ideology
Continuity
New directions
Big, hairy, audacious goals
Create cult-like cultures without
actually being cults
Groundedness
Constant movement toward goal
Try a lot of stuff and keep what works
Develop home grown management
Consistency
Expands possibilities
Clear core ideology
Freedom
Conserved ideology
Revolutionary progress
Preserve Ideology
(Stability)
Stimulate Progress
(Change)
No clear goals that are stimulating and
challenging
No new directions
No continuity “off the wall”
Complaints of “mixed messages”
about what you stand for
Decreasing number of new projects
and experiments
Stagnation
Chaotic confusion over ideology
Constriction – lack of freedom
Lost ideals
Complaints of things “falling between
the cracks”
Measures of product and process
quality show no improvement or they
decline
No progress
Not Sustainable
Projects late or not completed at all