Researching sex and intimacy in contemporary life: An interdisciplinary symposium July 18th 2014 School of Law, Politics and Sociology University of Sussex Abstracts & Speaker biographies Introduction Dr Ben Fincham, University of Sussex Ben Fincham has been involved with developing projects on 'mobilities', qualitative approaches to studying work in unstable employment environments and the relationship between work and mental health. He has worked on gendered aspects of suicide and death as well as gender and research methods. He is currently writing a book for Palgrave Macmillan entitled 'The Sociology of Fun'. He is also developing projects on sex and sexuality in the Centre for Gender Studies. Challenging Narratives, Intimate Lives: Sex Workers' Love Stories Professor Andrea Cornwall, University of Sussex Based on love stories told by members of the Indian sex workers’ collective VAMP (Veshya Anyay Mukti Parishad, Sex Workers’ Freedom from Injustice Collective) and their lovers, this paper draws on a project that sought to explore a dimension of sex workers’ lives that is often neglected: their affective relationships. Women’s tales of lingering memories of first love, of laying down conditions that men who want to be with them have to meet and of lasting companionship, are coupled with the narratives of their lovers, who speak of the depth of their love and care. Violence is no stranger in women's relationship histories, nor other modes of coercion and control, and yet what they reveal profoundly challenges pervasive normative narratives about sex work purveyed in the western media and by the rescue industry. Money plays a part in these stories, as a means that sustains the status quo as sex workers use their resources to keep their lovers' marriages afloat, children schooled, families fed and that challenges conventional relations of power, where the client-turnedlover becomes the cherished dependent rather than the provider. Together, these stories of love and life are a powerful antidote to reductionist representations of male predators and female victims. Andrea Cornwall is a political anthropologist, and is currently Head of the School of Global Studies at the University of Sussex. Director of the Pathways international research programme consortium, she has worked on questions of gender and sexuality, radical democracy and human rights. Her recent publications include Feminisms, Empowerment and Development: Changing Women's Lives (Cornwall and Edwards eds. Zed, 2013) and Women, Sexuality and the Political Power of Pleasure (Jolly, Cornwall and Hawkins, eds. Zed, 2012) An Examination of the Interaction between Cyberqueer Techno-practice and Offline Gay Male Experience in Contemporary China Tianyang Zhou, University of Sussex This study examines the interaction between cyberqueer techno-practice and offline gay male experience in contemporary China. As such, it addresses the research questions how gay men in contemporary China experience possibilities and constraints in their offline and online life. This study uses complementary methods in order to capture this complexity between online practices and offline experiences of gay men, in which the combination of an online survey, semi-structured interviews, and simple observations serve to deepen and enrich one another. The findings suggest that new media plays an increasingly vital role in Chinese gay men’s everyday life, which makes a great contribution to self-representation, community-making, as well as romantic and erotic practices. Meanwhile, the interconnectedness between cyberqueer techno-practice and offline gay experience reveals a more comprehensive picture of Chinese gay male culture. As cyberspace was considered to be more flexible in that it transcends the real world, it seemed to be the ultimate manifestation of queer theory. The term ‘cyberqueer’ refers to the alliances between queer experiences and computer-mediated worlds, which stresses the independence of the two concepts in both daily practices and academic research. With the development of mobile telecommunications technologies, through using GPS technologies, gay chat and dating mobile applications can show their users the guys closest to them who are using it, which appears to be fast and convenient. Cyberqueer techno-practices play a vital role in the gay men’s life in contemporary China but since much more research has focused on offline gay experiences, far too little attention has been paid to the influence of ICTs on Chinese gay man’s life in the Internet age. Tianyang Zhou is a Doctoral candidate in Media and Cultural Studies, Media and Film department, MFM. 2012-2013: MA in Globalization and Communications, Merit, University of Leicester. 2007-2011: BA (Hons) in Biotechnology, First Class, Beijing Normal University. Editor and journalist for UK Chinese Journal in London. Intersections between identity and practices of intimacy in asexual lives: freedom, foreclosure and resolution Dr Susie Scott and Dr Elizabeth McDonnell, University of Sussex This paper will present preliminary findings from a qualitative study that explored issues around identity and intimacy with a group of participants who in different ways identified with the term ‘asexual’. Data was collected through biographical narrative interviews (n=50) and 2 week semi -structured diaries (n=27). The ideas presented here are from the early stages of analysis and based on the interview rather than the diary data. This paper will consider the ways in which an ‘asexual identity’ (and the interactions around this), shape the practices of intimacy available to individuals but also how in turn, experiences of, and desires around intimacy and intimate relationships challenge, affirm and develop asexual identities. Initial themes of foreclosure, freedom and working (successfully and unsuccessfully) at pragmatic resolutions in romantic/special relationships will be discussed. Susie Scott is a Reader in Sociology at the University of Sussex, with research interests in self-identity and interaction, Goffman’s dramaturgical theory and Symbolic Interactionism. She is the author of Shyness and Society (Palgrave 2007), Making Sense of Everyday Life (Polity 2009) and Total Institutions and Reinvented Identities (Palgrave 2011), and is currently completing her latest book Negotiating Identity (Polity 2015). She has also published empirical research articles on topics including shyness and social interaction, identities in mental health, total institutions and swimming pool behaviour. Liz McDonnell has worked as a qualitative researcher for a number of years across a range of areas e.g. health, family/parenting, education and disability. Her PhD explored fertility decision making using narrative research methods. She also teaches data analysis using NVivo 10 Enduring Love? The Sticky Stuff that Counts Dr Jacqui Gabb, The Open University The Enduring Love? study (ESRC RES-062-23-3056, 2011-2013) is exploring what it means and feels like to be a couple in contemporary Britain. Shifting the emphasis away from media hyperbole and unsubstantiated claims about what everyone is doing, and policy– professional practice emphasis on the ‘stressors’ which may contribute to relationship breakdown, we are focusing on the things that help people sustain their ‘enduring’ relationships. Drawing on survey (n=5494) and qualitative (n=50) data this paper will explore which factors count in shaping relationship experience, and, in particular, the in/significance of sex and sexuality. Survey findings indicate that gender, parenthood and sexuality are significant factors in shaping couple relationship experience. For example, non-heterosexual participants are the most positive about their relationship; in heterosexual relationships, parenthood appears to have an adverse impact on sexual desire. However, differences in sexual frequency and desire do not per se affect perceptions of relationship quality. To tease apart these survey patterns, I draw on rich multiple methods data to explore how couples variously work to fit themselves into the ideal or extend ‘the story’ to fit their lives. These data provoke us to rethink the couple (dyadic) relationship and its slippage into and conflation with cultural understandings of the heteronormative ‘couple norm’. Interests centre on interdisciplinary psycho-social approaches for researching and theorizing intimacy and family life, with particular emphasis on the contemporary dynamics of policy, professional practice and personal relationships. Longstanding interest in the experiences and meanings of gender and sexuality in same-sex parent families. Most recently, in collaboration with Janet Fink, she has been investigating how adults experience, understand and sustain long-term couple relationships (www.enduringlove.co.uk). This large scale ESRCfunded study Enduring Love? Couple Relationships in the 21st Century (RES-062-23-3056) has received widespread national and international attention. Previous research projects include Fragile Fathering: Negotiating Intimacy and Risk in Parenting Practice (British Academy); Behind Closed Doors: Researching Intimacy and Sexuality in Families (ESRC); Perverting Motherhood? Sexuality and Lesbian Parent Families (ESRC). She is co-editor of the Open Space section in the Policy Press journal, Families, Relationships, Societies and CoDirector of the Families, Relationships and Communities (CCIG) Programme at The Open University. She has published widely in the area of family and intimate relationships. Her book Researching Intimacy in Families (2008, Palgrave Macmillan) won the BSA Philip Abrams Memorial Prize 2009. Her forthcoming book, written in collaboration with Janet Fink, is Couple Relationships in the 21st Century (2015, Palgrave Macmillan). Jacqui.Gabb@open.ac.uk ‘Intimacy with sexual objects: women and sex toys’ Rachel Wood, University of Sussex This paper will examine the ways in which a range of objects marketed and sold as ‘sex toys’ are mobilised in the construction of sexual intimacies with the self and others. Drawing upon my qualitative doctoral research data on UK women’s experiences of sex shopping, I argue that sexual commodities such as dildos, vibrators and BDSM accessories enable and disable a range of possible sexual identities, desires and practices for women. Whilst the design and marketing of these commodities often constructs female sexuality in heteronormative, heterosexist and phallocentric ways, women’s everyday use of sex toys reveals practices of adaptation and critique, demonstrating the complexity of meaning that can accrue to material objects as they become integrated into everyday intimate repertoires. Sex toys, when used alone as part of women’s auto-erotic practices, can be understood as part of a regulatory regime of sexual self-improvement through consumption regularly promoted by postfeminist sex advice in magazines such as Cosmopolitan. And yet women’s mundane masturbation routines highlight narratives of ‘favourite’ vibrators and their adaptation to suit sexual preference that appear in part to exceed this commoditised understanding of sexuality. Similarly, the marketing of sex toys to ‘spice up’ long term sexual partnerships requires women to undertake emotional labour in order to maintain and nurture an ideal relationship. Yet the ways in which these objects can become integrated into sexual relationships as mediators for, or communicators and symbols of desire and pleasure demonstrates the way in which sexual intimacies will always partially exceed the logic of the marketplace. Conversely, depending on their framing and use, sexual commodities can also be positioned as obstacles that block ‘authentic’ intimacy by intervening in the closeness between bodies. Sex toys, then, reveal the complex ways in which all intimacies are partly constructed through drawing upon our material surroundings, showing how limitations and possibilities for intimacy are shaped by commodity culture. Rachel Wood is currently writing up her PhD in Gender Studies at the University of Sussex based in the department of Media Film and Music, where she is also employed as a tutorial fellow. Her PhD research focuses on UK women's experiences of sex shops and the products they sell. Her research on lingerie has previously been published in the Journal of Gender Studies, and she is co-editing and contributing to a double special issue of Porn Studies on porn consumers and audiences, due in early 2015. ‘Trying hard when neither of us wants to’: sex and intimacy following miscarriage Dr Petra Boynton, UCL While still considered a taboo topic by many, miscarriage is very common with an estimated 1:4 pregnancies ending in this way. Research on the impact of pregnancy loss is still very much in development and generally focuses on physical and psychological reactions to miscarriage, ignoring issues around sex and intimacy in relationships. How people cope after miscarriage varies. For some it’s an experience that brings people together – both in intimate relationships or with friends and family offering care. Others find the miscarriage causes relationships problems and in some cases separation or divorce. Problems may be magnified in cases where people are using assisted conception, experiencing recurrent miscarriage, or encounter problems within healthcare systems that exacerbate their loss. Where people want to try again for another baby the pressure to get pregnant and have sex with a background of loss, fear, grief and possible trauma can affect both the physical and psychological aspects of sex. Discussions of how and when to resume sex or fertility treatments can be confusing, particularly within healthcare where such discussions are overlooked through conversations about managing the miscarriage. In this presentation I would like to review what we do know and highlight what we don’t about sex and intimacy following miscarriage. Particularly addressing the methodological limitations of research on this topic and ideas for more varied approaches to researching and discussing sex and intimacy against the backdrop of pregnancy loss. I will be drawing on my recent research with the Miscarriage Association about partners’ experiences of pregnancy loss and my wider work on pregnancy, parenthood, sex and relationships to inform a general conversation about how best to answer intimacy questions about relationships post-miscarriage in practical ways for diverse groups of people. I’m a Senior Lecturer in International Health Care Research at UCL where I teach healthcare staff from across the world how to find and use evidence. My research is community led with a focus on the Global South and includes assessing advice giving in the media; epidemiological research on sexual problems; and modernising sexual health, youth and maternity services. My current projects are From Bump To Grind aimed at improving sex and relationships advice for those trying to conceive, who are pregnant, or are parents. Partners Too a storytelling project with the Miscarriage Association with partners of women who have experienced pregnancy loss. And No Star To Guide Me building resources for media advicegivers worldwide, based partly on my 12 years experience of being an Agony Aunt. I currently write a weekly advice column in The Telegraph. Web: www.drpetra.co.uk Email: info@drpetra.co.uk Twitter: @drpetra https://www.facebook.com/groups/frombumptogrind Negotiating intimacy, equality and sexuality in the transition to parenthood Dr Charlotte Faircloth, University of Kent Whilst both ‘parenting’ and ‘intimacy’ have been explored extensively in recent sociological and anthropological work, their intersections in the context of family life remain curiously absent. This paper presents findings from some on-going research with parents in London, which investigates how the care of children, and particularly the feeding of infants, affects the parental couple’s ‘intimate’ relationship. British culture has recently witnessed a turn toward a new construction of the ‘good father’ as a means of countering perceived inequalities in parenting. Fatherhood has become politicised as some claim better work-life balance policies are needed to make sure fathers can be more involved with parenting. Yet at the same time that fathers are encouraged to be ‘involved’ in parenting, women are advised to breastfeed their babies ‘exclusively for six months’, and are those who typically take extended periods of time away from work (even in societies where shared parental leave is offered, as is currently the case in the UK). The research addresses the contradiction between styles of parenting which argue for mother-child attachment and calls for gender equality and paternal engagement. Who does the caring, why, and with what implications for gendered ‘identity-work’? How, in particular for the focus of this symposium, does embodied care on the part of the mother (with the child or children sharing the marital bed in the early stages of breastfeeding) affect the intimate and sexual life of the couple, the emotional trajectory of ‘love’ between partners themselves, and that with their children? This paper will introduce a discussion of some of the challenges families may face in maintaining their philosophical choices around parenting practices, exploring the relationship between choice and accountability, as a novel theoretical area. In particular, it examines relationships between sex, intimacy and equality, as it relates to gendered and embodied parenting roles. Dr Charlotte Faircloth is a Research Fellow, based at the University of Kent, working on a Leverhulme Trust funded project entitled ‘Parenting: Gender, Intimacy and Equality’. She completed her PhD at the Department of Social Anthropology at the University of Cambridge, exploring women’s experiences of attachment parenting and ‘full-term’ breastfeeding in London and Paris. She was Mildred Blaxter postdoctoral research fellow with the Foundation for the Sociology of Health and Illness, during which she completed her book Militant Lactivism? Attachment parenting and intensive motherhood in the UK and France, published by Berghahn Books. She is interested in cultures of parenthood; notions of body, gender and equality in caregiving and its implication for other relationships; and more broadly in knowledge claims around optimal forms of care. As well as editing several journal special issues, she recently co-edited a volume entitled Parenting in Global Perspective: Negotiating ideologies of kinship, self and politics, for Routledge, and is co-author of Parenting Culture Studies published by Palgrave. The problem of sex and intimacy in sex advice media Dr Meg Barker, The Open University Drawing upon a wider research project on mediated intimacy (Barker, Gill & Harvey, forthcoming 2015), this paper focuses on the ways in which the combining of sex and intimacy is the problem underlying sex advice media, particularly sex advice books and newspaper problem pages. Whilst rarely explicitly stated, the implicit assumptions driving the vast majority of mainstream sex self-help books are that people must be sexual (the sexual imperative) and that they must also be in a certain kind of long term intimate partner relationship. This creates a tension as most books acknowledge that it is difficult to sustain sex within such relationships, but the solutions offered in these books must not stray outside certain normative sexual scripts and heteronormative and mononormative relational restrictions. The issues are perhaps more explicit when we turn to newspaper agony columns, in which by far the most common problems covered related to infidelity, concerns around sexual identity, and sustaining sex in long term intimate relationships. This paper presents a ‘sex-critical’ framework for the analysis of sexual self-help and problem pages, and similar texts (Downing, 2012), concluding that reflection on and expansion of - what constitutes both ‘sex’ and ‘intimacy’, may offer a more fruitful route than that taken by mainstream sex advice. Dr. Meg John Barker is a writer, academic, counsellor and activist specialising in sex and relationships. Meg is a senior lecturer in psychology at the Open University and has published many academic books and papers on topics including nonmonogamous relationships, sadomasochism, counselling, and mindfulness, as well as co-editing the journal Psychology & Sexuality. They were the lead author of The Bisexuality Report – which has informed UK policy and practice around bisexuality. They are involved in running many public events on sexuality and relationships, including Sense about Sex, Critical Sexology, and Gender & Sexuality Talks. Meg is also a UKCP accredited therapist working with gender and sexually diverse clients. Meg’s 2013 book Rewriting the Rules is a friendly guide to love, sex and relationships, and they blog about these matters on www.rewriting-the-rules.com. Twitter: megbarkerpsych. Heterosexual single mothers’ accounts of sex, dating and intimacy Dr Charlotte Morris, University of Sussex This paper draws on finding from doctoral research which explored the intimate lives and narratives of twenty-four single mothers in the South-East of England. The study employed the concept of ‘intimacy scripts’ (developed from Simon and Gagnon, 1973) as a way of understanding the complex interplay between broad cultural narratives and shared understandings of how intimate lives should be lived, specific social contexts and ‘personal scripts’ of fantasies, desires and expectations. This paper focusses on participants’ accounts of sex and dating, viewing these within the context of broader cultural narratives about intimacy. Participants drew on a range of cultural narratives in making sense of their experiences. These are reflected in social theory with notions that relationships have become more open and democratic, that being part of a couple is the ultimate achievement of individualised lives and that sexual pleasure is a key aspect of relating (Giddens, 1992). Theorists working within this detraditionalization framework also highlight the significance of experimentation and impermanence in intimate lives. More pessimistic approaches emphasise increased choice in terms of fragmentation and moral breakdown (Bauman, 2003). There was also a heightened awareness of ‘the darker side of intimacy’ (Plummer, 2003), the inherent risks and potential for deception, exploitation and abuse. Participants’ accounts also reflected the continued value accorded to love and romance in western culture, even where negative experiences of romantic partnerships engendered disappointment. While for some becoming single represented an opportunity to experiment, to create alternative intimacy scripts, heteronormative ideals of coupledom and the traditional family were a significant touchstone against which participants compared their experiences. Charlotte Morris recently completed her doctorate in Gender Studies at the University of Sussex and is currently working on articles for publication. Her thesis was entitled ‘Unsettled scripts: Intimacy narratives of heterosexual single mothers’ and research interests include intimacy, family, motherhood, gender, feminism and narrative research. She previously studied BA (Hons) English Literature and MA Women’s Studies at Anglia Ruskin University in Cambridge. Charlotte also has research interests in the field of Higher Education, including widening participation, undergraduate and postgraduate learning, student parents, experiences of students with disabilities and student wellbeing – having completed a number of research projects in this field. She is currently employed as an Associate Tutor at the University of Sussex and also works as a Student Support and Guidance Tutor at the University of Brighton. She lives in Hove with her three children and four cats. Getting at consent: An innovative combination of sociological theory and methodology Bryony Chater, University of Surrey What is consent? What does consent do and how is it done? Researching consent to sexual relations presents many challenges to researchers contending with the illusiveness and elusiveness of the concept. The aim of this paper is to present an innovative combination of sociological theory and methodology being applied in a current research project to bring to the fore the concept of consent in the context of long term couples’ intimate and sexual relationships. The qualitative research design is intended to explicate the how and what of consent in research participants’ stories of consent and how are they produced in the research context. The presentation discusses how situated dimensions of social life will be approached through a scripting framework, originating in the work of Simon and Gagnon, to explore how cultural and social orders come to be constituted in the meaning making process of accounting work. This framework is deployed alongside a less well known ethnomethodological strategy, namely, Membership Categorization Analysis, to enable the ordering of accounts to be illuminated by privileging participants’ knowledge over the researcher’s interpretations. The combination is intended to produce analytic insights on the interrelations between cultural ideas of consent and the ‘doing’ of consent in performances and emotion work in couple’s sexual relationships. Preliminary data from the ongoing research project will be used to illustrate how Membership Categorization Analysis can be framed by the scripting perspective to research the complexity and intangibility of consent through this innovative combination of theory and methodology. Bryony completed a degree in Criminology at the University of Kingston and proceeded to the University of Surrey where she completed a Masters in Social Research Methods. Bryony is currently in the second year of a PhD in Sociology at the University of Surrey and soon to embark upon the field work phase. The research will explore constructions of consent in accounts of couple members negotiating their sexual relationships. This qualitative project employs focus groups, interviews and solicited diaries to generate data. The data analysis will draw upon interpretive and ethnomethodological analytic tools to approach the facets of consent and consensual sexual relationships. Sexuality, Intimacy and Faith: What Difference Does Religious Belonging Make? Dr Sarah-Jane Page, Aston University Prevailing discourses associate religion with the problematisation of sexuality, and many studies have demonstrated the difficulties lesbian and gay religious individuals face in integrating their faith and sexual identity (Thumma 1991; Wilcox 2009; Yip 2005). But the study of intimate life and religion is less pronounced; much less is known about the everyday negotiation and management of intimacy and sex in relation to issues such as navigating partnerships, (non)parenthood, love, separation and divorce, contraception, celibacy, pre-marital sex and sexual practices within the context of faith. In addition, the experience of religious heterosexuals has been littletheorised. I was part of the 2009-2011 multi-method AHRC-ESRC project entitled Religion, Youth and Sexuality which focused on 18 to 25 year olds of different sexual identities, from six religious traditions (see Page et al. 2012; Yip and Page 2013). This research helped highlight many dimensions to intimacy, sexuality and religion, but was only focused on a small age cohort. This brief presentation will highlight future research directions, including what is currently missing from the research agenda, and plans for addressing this. The presentation will specifically focus on what theorising from the perspective of intimate life can add to the broader research terrain on religion and sexuality. Dr Sarah-Jane Page is Lecturer in Sociology at Aston University, Birmingham, UK. Sarah’s principal area of research is religion as it intersects with gender and sexuality. Her ESRC-funded PhD focused on the experiences of Anglican clergy mothers and male clergy spouses, the findings of which have been published in journals such as Gender, Work and Organization, Feminist Review and Feminist Theology. She has worked on numerous projects, including exploring public attitudes towards homosexuality, as well as mapping the experiences of religious youth negotiating sexuality (the Religion, Youth and Sexuality project, funded by the AHRCESRC). The main findings were published in the book, Religious and Sexual Identities: A Multi-faith Exploration of Young Adults (with A.K.T. Yip, 2013, Ashgate). She has undertaken a fellowship at the University of Ottawa, and has previously held research posts at both the University of Nottingham and Durham University. Stirring dangerous waters: dilemmas and opportunities critical participatory work with young people Audrey M. Dentith, Lynda Measor, & Michael P. O’Malley Presented by Dr Lynda Measor, University of Brighton This paper explores dilemmas of critical, participatory research related to sexuality and intimacy with young people. It presents illustrating examples from field researchers from three separate projects in the UK and US and highlights issues of access, participation, dissemination and the misuse of findings. Authors stress the need for new, more complex field strategies including more participatory research models, attention to transgression of power through research and broader skills in media dissemination. The work was grounded in the researchers’ commitments to researching to ‘make a difference’ in the lives of young people. By promoting participant engagement that might affect personal understanding and policy change. The young people in each study face a range of deprivations and life difficulties. The methods draw from perspectives that counter the resurgent logic of positivism that are increasingly favoured in contemporary academic research by funding authorities and that reflect the prevailing governing mentalities that thwart critical emancipatory research in this era of post-neoliberalism. Dr Lynda Measor is a Reader in Applied Social Sciences in the School of Applied Social Sciences at the University of Brighton. She completed undergraduate and postgraduate degrees at the University of Sussex and the London School of Economics. Her research work is based on an interest in young people - and relates to questions concerning the problems they encounter in the context of this late modern world. She has published books on young people and their transfer to secondary school, on young people and community safety, on young people's views of sex education on gender and education and on teachers careers. She has held research funding from the ESRC,AHRB and Dept of Education. The paper given at this conference is based on research funded by the Department of Health and the Department of Education and located in the Social Exclusion Unit. The project was called LOTE (Living on the Edge) and considered issues of young people’s sexuality and specifically teenage pregnancy in three English seaside towns. The funders insisted on some participatory research methods in the project and the paper today discusses issues that arose in implementing those methods. It includes a comparative element with two pieces of American research which considered the same issues. Reanimating sexual stories Prof Rachel Thomson and Ester McGeeney, University of Sussex In this presentation we will report on our current methodological experiments with reanimating social research data on young people’s sexual cultures. We will explore theoretical frames for understanding the restaging of data using performance techniques and explore what this may mean in terms of reanimation. Our presentation will draw on a current ESRC knowledge exchange project and the methodology for a planned project about the near history of teenage sexuality called ‘Inside Out: the remaking of teenage sexuality.’ Ester is a youth researcher and practitioner currently working on a knowledge exchange project with the young people’s sexual health charity Brook. Ester’s research interests include young people’s sexual relationships and cultures, developing innovative research methods with children and young people and exploring ways of using research to inform policy and practice. Rachel Thomson is Director of the University of Sussex Centre for Innovation and Research in Childhood and Youth (CIRCY) www.sussex.ac.uk/esw/circy. She is a sociologist by discipline,and has worked at the Universityof Manchester, the National Children’s Bureau; London South Bank University and the Open University. Her research interests include the study of the life course and transitions, as well as the interdisciplinary fields of gender and sexuality studies. She is a methodological innovator and is especially interested in capturing lived experience, social processes and the interplay of biographical and historical time. 'Insubstantial Intimacies: Modernity, Method and Effect' Dr Paul Boyce, University of Sussex In this paper I want to look at what might happen when we approach intimate relationships from an anthropological standpoint that pays attention to how people may not want to make those intimacies visible - or socially substantive. In as much as ethnographically and culturally we may be keen, as researchers, to ground our work in actual life-worlds, life-worlds themselves are characterised by ephemeral qualities and perhaps even a will resist the substantiation of ones most important affective connections. I approach this epistemological standpoint from the perspective of my ethnographic work in West Bengal, India, conducted over a number of years with people of same-sex sexuality and/or gender non-conforming experience. One aspect of that work has involved looking at kinship in the context of such gendered and sexual 'differences', especially as people’s experiences of relatedness could be seen to respond to shifting expectations and effects of modernity. In this paper I am interested in the topology of intimate and familial relations in this context, especially in respect of the (re)shaping of same-sex desiring subjects and subjectivities in a manner that might be seen to confound understandings of the difference between the socially shown and the culturally invisible. Against this background the paper seeks to raise questions pertinent to anthropological perspectives of the substantiation of (queer) kinship in people’s everyday lives. I explore such questions in respect of some troubling 'intimate assemblages' as experienced by friends and co-researchers in West Bengal over-time, partly in response to changing politicaleconomies and activism pertaining to health (HIV). I explore the implications of this standpoint for cross-cultural understandings of sexualness, kinship and embodiment, partly from a methodological standpoint of 'failure'. I consider some implications for trans-national actions concerning sexual rights. I am a lecturer in the Department of Anthropology, University of Sussex. I work on same-sex intimacies and sexualities and am especially interested in interdisciplinary work, and work that crosses boundaries between academia, community work, and international development. Ethnographically I have mostly worked in West Bengal, India, but I have also worked on sexual rights and HIV prevention for a number of agencies internationally.