START A MEN’S MINISTRY!
WHY IS MEN’S MINISTRY IMPORTANT?
Many men feel a total disconnect when it comes to church. If given a choice,
spending time at church falls a distant second to spending time with friends, family,
or doing just about anything else.
Why is this? Well, simply put, one reason may be, when speakers or church
leadership speak of the ills in a relationship, it is almost always at the expense of
men. To have a relationship, you need at least two; yet these speakers continually
state or imply the fault lies solely on the man. How can that be? This kind of
irresponsible talk only adds to the problem. Men, feeling no support, withdraw from
the church. We lose our leaders! Did you know, that 70% of divorce is initiated by
women? I challenge those speakers…is it really only the men or are you pandering
to the audience? No one’s fooled! Pandering does not, in any way, heal anyone’s
relationship. Truth and support will!
A Men’s Ministry group has that kind of potential - to make a change. The
combined energy of God-centered men, aligned with the Holy Spirit, draws all
towards God’s mentality [His purpose]. We learn to manage our lives, how to be
priests of the home and stewards of His church. A Men’s Ministry group keeps men
active, healthy and encouraged. We do it for each other [Proverbs 27:17]!
For any Men’s Ministry group to be successful it should offer three things:
1. Solid, Christ-centered resources for spiritual growth; i.e. examine and discuss his
horizontal and vertical relationship with God, man and his social-eco system
[woman/environment];
2. Create ample occasions for fun and active recreation;
3. Provide the opportunity for members [get them ready!] to use their God-given
talents and time to make a powerful impact in their world, first.
GETTING STARTED
Initial Enthusiasm
Briefly meet with men interested in being part of a new Men’s Ministry. If you are
the leader, you must be enthusiastic, consistent, practical and above all, a great
listener! Do not be discouraged by small numbers!
Initial Meeting
a. MEN SUFFER IN SILENCE. Often there are many issues and concerns
men face but are hesitant to openly discuss. Those concerns can range from
marital relationships to secret sins. The ground rules must be established
immediately. Confidentiality is of the utmost concern. WHAT IS SAID
THERE-STAYS THERE! The quickest way to destroy the ministry is to have
someone betray that trust. If it should happen, the facilitator must earnestly
seek out the one(s) responsible for breaking the trust and address it
immediately. If the facilitator delays in acting – men will lose trust in the
leader; no longer talk openly; neither heal nor grow and eventually move on.
b. RESPECT. One of the most repeated items men want and have the hardest
time receiving is - ‘respect.’ All the good things a man accomplishes can be
either taken for granted or never acknowledged. Some men, however, do not
have those issues. If you are one, then consider yourself blessed. However,
many men encounter lack of respect and much more each and every day! A
kind, respectful ‘word’ may never come their way. Fix it ASAP! Here’s how c. END OF THE MEETING. Gather the men into the Circle of Affirmation,
similar to communion [foot washing] and start in one direction. Have one
man say to the next man on his right, “I respect you because…” Make it
brief! If one man doesn’t know the next man, he should say so. “I don’t know
this brother; however, I see how he does …and I think he is…” Watch how
every man’s spirit will be lifted. We don’t hear it enough! And the end, solicit
prayers for the ministry and then watch God work!
d. HANDLE DISTRACTIONS. Often “people” have little patience for
others. So kids, spouses etc. will become a distraction when you’re trying to
meet. Not wishing to offend, often the father/husband will acquiesce to the
inappropriate distraction. Continual distractions become a detriment to the
Ministry. This is a very important allotted time for prayer and bonding and
it should be respected.
At this point, your Men’s Ministry has been officially launched. Your core bunch of
men or committee will determine the particulars. Always work with your committee.
Starting a men’s ministry group within your church is no small challenge. It takes
determination and consistency. By all means, contact the NEC Men’s Ministry by
email with questions or requests at nec_men@ymail.com. And please include
suggestions for our improvement.
Blessings!
This article was written, by Elder Fred Patasaw, NEC Men’s Ministry Coordinator.