Adam and Eve – Created to Love
Genesis 1-3 (Making a Marriage Chapter 1 and 2)
For Better or Worse
You probably don’t want to know the statistics on marriage. In the 1930s, 1
out of 7 marriages ended in divorce. In the 1960s it was 1 out of 4. Today,
50% of marriages will end in divorce. For those who marry a second time,
60% of those marriages will end in divorce (Parrot, 12). Perhaps we should
change the wedding vows: ‘till divorce to us part.’ I can promise you the
new verbiage would put a real damper on the ceremony. While we may not
verbalize that in our vows, we certainly are part of a culture that assumes
that the marriage vows are only binding for as long as one desires them to
be.
I imagine that these statistics on marriage are nothing new to you.
However, researches tell us that these numbers are the same for those who
attend church and for those who don’t. Those who profess faith in Christ
and attend worship divorce at the same rate as those who do not. As a
church, we have a choice to make: to give in and change the marriage vows
‘until divorce do us part’ OR to preach and teach God’s love that binds,
holds and strengthens those who have made commitments to each other.
I choose the latter.
I hope you will as well. Over the next few weeks I want to share what God’s
Word has to say about the covenant of marriage. Using 3 biblical examples
of husbands and wives, we’ll briefly cover what the Bible teaches about
love, communication, commitment, intimacy, stress and conflict resolution.
I would also encourage you to get involved with a Life Group, as they will be
covering some additional material.
We don’t have to be confronted with the depressing stats on marriages to
know that marriages are in trouble. We need only to hold a mirror up to our
own marriage and we will be able to see problems and areas of
improvement. For some of us, the deficiencies are obvious! The fighting,
bickering and unhappiness paint a very clear picture. For others, we like
what we see, but if we look closer we can pinpoint specific areas that need
improvement. Regardless of where you are in your marriage, there is room
for improvement for everyone!
For those of you who are single, for whatever reason, I invite you to
experience the next few weeks as a self-diagnostic. I want to teach what the
Bible says about men and women and the institution of marriage in a way
that is applicable to everyone. Don’t miss what God is saying just because
you might think a particular passage or narrative is only for those burdened
by a spouse. 
Creation: A Marriage that reflects God
It’s obvious, that marriages are in trouble. However, a healthy doctrine of
creation tells us that marriages haven’t always been in peril. The Old
Testament reveals a significant part of its vision of marriage in the opening
chapters of Genesis. Some have stated that, more than any other human
institution, marriage goes back to the very activity of God in creation (Hahn,
11-12). Let’s refresh our memory of the story of creation. On the 6th day,
Genesis 1:27-30 tells us this:
Then God said, “Let us make man in our image, in our likeness, and let
them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the
livestock, over all the earth, and over all the creatures that move along
the ground.” So God created man in his own image, in the image of God
he created him; male and female he created them. God blessed them
and said to them, “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and
subdue it. Rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air and over
every living creature that moves on the ground.” (Genesis 1:26-30)
The creation account says something very significant about who we are as
human beings: we are created in the image of God. When we read ‘man’ it
is referring not just to males, but to all of humanity. It gets tricky because
the Hebrew word for humanity is a’dam, from which we get the proper
name, Adam. Understanding this is not just referring to males, but to all of
humanity is important. At the beginning of salvation’s story, God is affirming
that both male and female are living beings created in HIS image.
What does it mean that male and female are created in the image of God?
Being created in the image of God means that we have the potential to
reflect God.
ILLUSTRATION: Take a look at this painting. It’s by Rene Magritte. What is
this? An apple? No. If you knew French you would know this is not an apple.
The caption at the top reads: Ceci n’est pas une pomme. Which means, “this
is not an apple.” Apparently, this is art humor. If we were at Crystal Bridges
we would be dying laughing. The artist thinks this hilarious because we look
at this and immediately identify it as an apple. In reality, it’s not an apple.
It’s a canvas with paint on it arranged to look like an apple.
In the same way, we are created to reflect God. We are to reflect his love
and goodness back to him, as well as to reflect his love and kindness to
those around us so that they look at us and see God. Of course, we’re not
God! But wouldn’t it be great if we lived our lives in such a way that people
confused us with Jesus? Wouldn’t it be great if we reflected God’s image in
such a way that those around us had a hard time distinguishing between us
and Christ? Wouldn’t it be great if our marriages - and our relationships
with others - but specifically our marriages reflected the heart and character
of God.
God creates marriage by creating male and female in his image. This
demonstrates the unity and uniqueness of the male and female. The text
says he blessed them, both male and female. Look at his first command to
them (v. 28): “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue
it.” The man and woman are commanded to be God’s partners in creation.
He commands the male and female to become fruitful and numerous and
fill up the earth.
If we take this account literally, Adam and Eve better get busy. The earth is a
big place. That’s going to take a while.
But if we read this account in Genesis 1 as I think it is intended to be read,
this is a command to all of us. The marriage relationship is God’s way of
continuing his work of creation. What he began in Genesis 1, he continues
through people who love each other to take wedding vows that promise a
love that reflects the image of their creator. Creation continues through
those who promise to love in ‘sickness and in health, for richer or poorer,
for better or for worse, til death do us part.’ And it is within that context
that God says, “Be fruitful and multiply.”
To join God in creation is also to join God in the care of creation. This
passage assumes that the outcome of a marriage is children. Our greatest
responsibility as co-creators with God is to ensure that our children are
healthy, educated and most importantly loved as God loves. According to
Genesis 1, both male and female share this responsibility.
Creation: Marriage as one becoming two becoming one
As we move into chapter 2, we begin to get a specific account of God’s
vision for marriage. It’s almost as if 2 Hebrew traditions are being weaved
together. Genesis 1 gives us a big cosmic picture of creation, and now,
Genesis 2 paints a specific and more sharply focused picture of the nuances
of the marriage relationship.
Now the wording is difficult because of the limitations of our English
translations. Remember that a’dam can mean: 1) man, 2) all of humanity
and 3) the proper name, Adam. I would suggest a reading of chapter two
that reads a’dam as referring to humanity as a whole all the way up to verse
23.
Which means the story goes like this (forgive me for not using pronouns):
The Lord God fashioned humanity out of the ground. And breathed the
breath of life into humanity. Now there was a Garden in Eden, and the Lord
God put humanity in this wonderful Garden. Humanity was given charge
over the Garden and was instructed to take care of it. The Lord said that
humanity should not be alone. The Lord God brought all of the animals to
humanity and humanity gave names to all the livestock, the birds in the sky
and all the wild animal. Of all the animals under the care and responsibility
of humanity, none were found as a suitable companion. So the Lord caused
humanity to fall into a deep sleep. While humanity was sleeping, the Lord
took a rib from humanity and then closed up the place with flesh. Then the
Lord made…isha!
Woman! For the first time we are introduced to the feminine. It is not until
this point of the plot that the different genders are mentioned. Now the
Hebrew becomes more specific, using the terms ish for male and isha for
female. The man is very pleased with the companion, often translated
“helper” that God creates. I’ve actually done a word study of the first word
that the man says when he sees the woman God has created. The Hebrew
expression is, pa’am, and you miss this in the English translations, but the
literal meaning is, “Wow!” The best I could find in the English translations is
the Holman Christian Standard Version that separates this Hebrew idiom by
commas:
This one, at last, is bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh; this one will
be called “woman,” for she was taken from man. This is why a man
leaves his father and mother and bonds with his wife, and they become
one flesh. (Genesis 2:23-24, HCSV)
one flesh, the marriage couple. Without devaluing or dehumanizing persons
who are single either by or against their own choice, Genesis portrays what
it means to be human as a movement from one to two to one.
The conclusion of this process is beautiful:
The man and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame. (Genesis
2:25)
When you consider the usual modesty of the Old Testament, this is a
dramatic statement of vulnerability and trust. This verse envisions a
marriage characterized by complete openness and trust. Such a relationship
can never be one-sided. It is the picture of both partners placing themselves
– emotionally, spiritually, physically, and intellectually – in the hands of the
other in the confidence that they will not be betrayed or hurt (Hahn, 17).
Creation: Marriage as Fallen
What an awesome picture creation paints of marriage. It’s clear that God
desires several things for marriage. The covenant of marriage is designed to:
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Reflect the love of God to each other and to the world.
Create a loving and nurturing environment for children.
Celebrate differences, enhance similarities and compliment both
weaknesses and strengths.
Provide companionship in which God’s gifts of intimacy, mutual
respect, and love are experienced and reciprocated.
Don’t let your imagination get too wild here, but you might say this is the
climax of the story. Pa’am. But seriously, a wonderful picture is painted her
of God’s intention for male and female in marriage. The Hebrew word for
“bond” is often the same word used to refer to buckling of a belt. The
obvious image is a union of things that were designed to fit together. There
is an obvious physical compatibility between men and women. But this
“fitting together” this “bonding” refers to emotional, spiritual and
intellectual bonding as well. The 2 become 1 flesh, as each partner gives
himself or herself completely to the marriage and has made the marriage
more important than any other human relationship (hence ‘leaving mother
and father’).
Over the next few weeks I pray that more and more marriages look like this.
And if you’re planning to get married…some day…I want you to know what
kind of relationship God desires for you. However, I do have some bad
news: no one has a marriage this good. A marriage this good was enjoyed by
the first man and woman for about…well we don’t know how long, but it
took about 6 verses of scripture for their relationship to deteriorate to this:
As we walk away from Genesis 2, it’s clear what God has done and what he
intends to do throughout creation: he creates 1 undivided humanity in his
image, whom he differentiates into woman and man and then reunites into
Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they realized they were
naked; so they sewed fig leaves together and made coverings for
themselves. (Genesis 3:7)
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You’ve heard the story of the serpent tempting the women, the man and
woman both eating the forbidden fruit and the subsequent shame that
resulted from the first sin. Let’s look at how this affected their marriage:
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Disobedience destroyed the mutual vulnerability and trust that had
been the pinnacle of God’s creation of marriage.
The woman is now burdened with pain in child-bearing. The fruit of
sexual intimacy, something God gave to humanity for creation and
for pleasure, now results in pain and complication.
The man is now bound to hard work and difficult vocation, tasks
that take him away from the one who he is supposed to “cling to.”
The man is given power of the woman, as evidenced by his naming
of his wife. In this culture, to name someone is to exhibit power and
domination over them. It’s important that we realize the authority
males wield over women is not God-given. Rather, it is a result of
the Fall.
Because of sin, the marriage God intends for us is not going to come natural.
What comes natural is selfishness, domination, authority, hierarchy, and
conflict. We must consider what will determine our vision of marriage. Will
we choose to make the results of the fall - marriages characterized by
power struggles, domination, lack of vulnerability and intimacy – the goal
toward which we strive in our marriages? Or will we choose the vision of
marriage characterized by love, companionship, trust, intimacy, and
mutuality, for which God created human beings as our vision and goal.
Surely people who believe that God’s sanctifying power can renew the
divine image within us cannot be satisfied with a vision of marriage
determined by sin and the fall.
Let’s rediscover who we really are. Let’s rediscover that which Adam and
Eve knew so well, even if it was only for a season. Let’s rediscover what it
means to be created to love.