Counselor’s Corner-March 2015
Hi Everyone1
In March, we focus on Persistence and Doing Your Best. In helping kids understand this idea and put it
into practice, we hope to help them realize that attitude and effort go hand in hand and that both of
these factors are in their control.
Some kids believe that outside factors have the most influence as to whether or not a person will
succeed. They do not see success related to hard work, giving your best effort or having a positive
attitude; all of which are in their control. Rather, kids will put more emphasis on luck, natural ability
or a teacher liking a particular student (He/she is a teacher’s pet). Unfortunately, when kids believe
that success or failure is not related to what they do, they see no reason to make changes in their
behavior, so their level of effort stays the same. Without a change in effort or the realization of the
control they do possess in affecting positive change, little or no improvement follows.
I believe that the elementary school years are the most important time to instill in kids a positive work
ethic, as well to have high expectations for them. Parents can take steps to help their kids improve
attitude and effort. Here are some tips:
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Praise effort rather than success, grades or scores. It focuses your child’s attention on what he/she can control.
Praise improvement, especially if your child is showing a better attitude toward school. Moving in the right
direction is a great place to start!
Don’t over-do the praise. If you do, kids begin to think that no matter what they do, you’ll LOVE it, so why work
so hard? Earning the success is very important. This is what gives a child that sense of accomplishment.
Too many rewards don’t work. Much like too much praise, rewards can become meaningless or worse, they can
become the goal. What will you give me if I do this? The goal should be more focused on feeling accomplished
and taking pride in a job well-done.
Don’t help too much. A bit of struggle is a GOOD thing and it’s necessary for kids to learn to push through in spite
of difficulty. This is a life lesson they will have to face time and again. Let them learn it a little at a time, so that
when they are adults they won’t need you to fix their problems.
Don’t be too sympathetic when your child fails. Find a balance between not caring and caring too much. It can be
difficult, but this way your message is, “I know it was hard and didn’t work out this time, but I believe you’ll be
okay.”
Don’t compare what other children do. This puts too much emphasis on results rather than on the successes your
child is actually having.
Check your own attitude. Are you staying positive? Do you work hard to achieve a goal? Be a mentor to your
child and invest in them. One day, they will be adults you enjoy on a whole new level.
Talk to the teacher. Work as a team to help your child succeed and move forward. Remember, we want your
child to succeed, too, and we want to help launch them from Mott Road to Middle School with more
independence, confidence and
grit (see below) to be their very best!
Sincerely,
Julie Wolf; School Counselor
Get along with others Responsibility Integrity Tenacity
Get Grit!