Kevin Lee
ESL 100D
4/23. 2014
Teddy Chocos
I chose Misaki’s second academic paper “The influence of the American
frontiersman to Native American”. Introduction in her writing showed both position: positive
and negative. At the first, she said frontiersman was a hero in today’s American society,
promoted the idea, the equality of opportunity, and became the model of individual freedom.
However, she claimed frontiersman was bad because he gave negative effects to Native
Americans, killed a lot of them, and treated them as bad guys by media such as movies.
In addition, she used transitions very well to move from one point to the next. She
wrote the history of the United States about the experience of western frontier and the history
made the shape of today’s America. After that paragraph, she mentioned frontiersman killed a
lot of Native Americans in order to make today’s American society. In body paragraph two,
she stated the mistake of frontiersman to Native Americans about massacre. After paragraph
two, she said another mistake to Native Americans by media. Her transitions made me
“Wow!” enough. Moreover, she used quote in the American ways by Maryanne Kearny
Datesman. She used “….thousands of American Indians were killed and their lands were
taken.” (p80 paragraph2) This quote demonstrates frontiersman massacred many Native
Americans. Another quote “The Native Americans were given small portions of land, called
reservations, to control, but the United States government broke many promises and created
much misery for the Indian nations.” (p80, paragraph3) demonstrates American government
ignored Native Americans. In addition, she wrote begin and end of the paper to show positive
aspect of frontiersman to stress her thesis statement which claims negative effect of
frontiersman to Native Americans.
When I read Misaki’s wow essay, I recognize I can write two positions in
introduction with appropriate words and two positions help me to stress my statement or
thesis. In addition, I know I am weak at transitions to move from one point to the next. In my
writing, I think conjunction is only thing to move to next paragraph. However, after I read her
paper, I realize what transition does to connect each paragraph. Moreover, I am always
suffered from citation after citation because it was awkward and new type for me. However, I
know how to do it after word-to-word citation after I read her paper.