MARRIAGE PREPARATION PROCESS – ST. STEPHEN PARISH - 847-824-2026
Church
1280 Prospect
Des Plaines, IL 60018
Parish Center
1253 Everett Ave.
Des Plaines, IL 60018
1. The official contact is a priest or deacon. The staff in the Parish Center Office has the basic
information about the Sacrament of Marriage. Only the priest or deacon can set a date for
marriage. At least one of the couple must be a member of St. Stephen Parish or live within the
boundaries. If not, then you must receive special permission from the pastor of your home
parish to schedule the date at St. Stephen.
2. If either of the couple has been previously married, we cannot promise a wedding date until the
correct paperwork is completed, freeing the person from any Canonical responsibilities before
entering to another marriage bond. For any previous marriage, (civil or church) we will advise
you of what documents are necessary to submit.
3. From initial contact to Marriage Ceremony, a time period of at least 6 months is recommended.
Why? Because during this time the couple will more seriously focus on their spiritual formation,
readiness, and preparation for the Sacrament of Christian Marriage in the Catholic Church.
Here are some expectations:
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The couple is expected to attend Sunday Mass with their home parish community
whether here at St. Stephen or another Catholic church closer to their home. If either
the bride or groom is not Catholic, then that person is encouraged to continue the
practice of his/her own faith tradition.
Some involvement in parish life (volunteer work service, ministries, prayer groups, etc.)
also helps to enrich one’s faith in preparation for the Sacrament of marriage, and the
lifetime commitment it involves.
In addition, the couple is advised to celebrate the Sacrament of Reconciliation
(Confession) sometime before the wedding either here at St. Stephen’s on Saturday
afternoon, or at any other Catholic Church. It is not recommended to wait until the final
week before the wedding.
Finally, the couple is encouraged to read the Bible (Scripture) and engage in a few
minutes of daily prayer (before eating, in the morning or before bed).
In these ways, you are building habits in the practice of the Christian faith in the Catholic
tradition, individually and together as a couple. These ways strengthen the bonds of
Christian love in the present and for the future.
4. After the first meeting with the priest or deacon, but before the Marriage Preparation sessions,
the couple will need to make the next appointment with the priest or deacon to discuss the
Prenuptial Questionnaire.
5. The couple will attend a Pre-Cana Class offered by the Catholic Archdiocese of Chicago 3-4
months before the wedding date. (See separate booklet). Arrangements are made directly
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with the Cana Conference/Family Ministries Office at (312) 751-8201. The couple will be given a
card at the completion of the class which is to be turned into St. Stephen for your marriage file.
6. After the couple has attended the marriage Preparation session(s), they will need to call the
deacon or priest to schedule an appointment for a follow up and start planning for the
ceremony.
7. The couple will obtain a Marriage License from the Cook County Clerk’s Office. See front pages
of wedding preparation booklet and call (312) 443-5663.
Note: Any person that has applied for permanent residence with the Department of Immigration
of the United States, through their parents as a single person, upon marrying the process of its
application will be delayed and can be rejected by the INS Department. Upon being rejected it
also loses its place in the immigration waiting list. You will need to complete a new application as
a married person and this will be a new process with a new waiting list. Please take this into
account before requesting the marriage license.
DO NOT MARRY in a civil ceremony; in other words, in the United States it is NOT NECESSARY to be
married by a judge before the church ceremony. Simply, go to the Cook County Office, purchase
the license, and bring the new, blank license to the priest/deacon. We will hold the license until the
day of the wedding when we will sign it and mail it back to the Cook County Clerk’s Office.
If a couple is already civilly married, then a COPY of the civil license should be brought to the
priest/deacon as soon as possible.
8. Two official Catholic witnesses are required during the Marriage ceremony. (Best Man/Maid of
Honor or two others.) They ought to be practicing Catholics and completed the Sacraments of
Initiation (Baptism, First Communion and Confirmation). They can be married or single and at
least 16 years of age. If married, they need to be married in the Church.
9. Each of you will need two witnesses to come and see the priest or deacon to fill out the
Witness Affidavit form. These two witnesses could be the official Catholic witnesses or two
other persons (see #8 above). If your witnesses live out of the area, they can fill out the Witness
Affidavit form in the presence of any deacon or priest at any Catholic Church in the world.
Those complete forms need to be sent to St. Stephen Church prior to the wedding ceremony.
10. Both bride and groom need to obtain a new Baptismal Certificate from the church of Baptism.
These need to be recent (within the past 6 months). If you do not have the address of the
church, ask us for help. If you were baptized outside the United States, write or call that church
immediately, because it may take months to obtain.
11. An offering of $400 to St. Stephen Church is suggested. $500 for non-parishioners. In order to
reserve a date for your Marriage, a deposit of $100 is necessary. This is applied to the offering
amount and the remaining amount must be paid in full at least two weeks before the wedding.
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12. If the couple will be getting married at another church, and the preparation process will be
completed here at St. Stephen, the offering is $150. We will prepare a letter of authorization
and documentation for the church of Marriage stating that you completed the preparation
classes.
13. It is your responsibility to arrange the music for the marriage ceremony. The Music Director at
St. Stephen will be contacted to discuss music selection. The offering for the music is included
in the $400/$500 total.
14. Photographers need to check with the priest/deacon before the marriage ceremony. We ask
that they not enter the sanctuary area during the ceremony.
15. Aisle runners are not to be brought in from an outside vendor. The parish has a red carpet aisle
runner that can be rented for your ceremony. Please inform the pastor if you are interested in
renting it. Flower petals can be used if a member of the family is able to clean them up
following the Mass. (There is no maintenance person present on weekends and you will be
billed $100 if cleanup is necessary.) No tape can be used on the floor or on the pews.
16. Flowers should be kept to a minimum. Arches are not necessary. Simplicity is beauty in itself!
17. Rice / confetti / bird seed/ balloons, etc. are NOT ALLOWED inside or outside the church.
Only small bells or bubbles are allowed outside the church. Please tell families and guests.
(The church has no maintenance person present on weekends and you will be billed $100 if
cleanup is necessary.)
18. Chewing gum, food or beverages are not allowed in church at any time. Remember to deposit
your chewing gum into the canisters by the entrance door of the church before the ceremony.
19. Your next meeting with us will be on ______________________________________________.
Revised July 2015
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