Moving from an A to an A

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Turnings As to A* in the Romeo and
Juliet Controlled Assessment Task
Three Areas
1. Enhanced Fluency
2. Analyse how techniques work together for
effect
3. Showing whole text knowledge
Fluency
• Definition—the ability to express oneself easily and articulately;
eloquence.
• Technically sound
– In act one, scene four of romeo & juliet mercutio and romeos’
relationship is presented as brotherly.
• Vary sentence structures and beginnings
– In act one, scene four of Romeo & Juliet, Mercutio and Romeo’s
relationship is presented as brotherly. In this scene we witness the
actions of the two friends prior to their trip to the masked ball of the
rival Capulets.
– This much better. At the beginning of Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet,
Romeo and Mercutio are preparing to venture the masked back of
their bitter rivals, the Capulets. Both the strength and depth of their
friendship is revealed here by Shakespeare, for doing so foreshadows
the allegiance that each of them show later in the play.
Fluency (continued)
• Set the scene/give context to your main point of discussion
– Have you made the reader aware of what is happening, where,
when???
– Basic: In act one, scene four of Romeo & Juliet, Mercutio and Romeo’s
relationship is presented as brotherly.
– Better: At the beginning of act one, scene four of Shakespeare’s
romantic tragedy Romeo & Juliet, Mercutio and Romeo’s relationship
is presented as brotherly.
• Describe your discussion points
– Use adjectives to explain how a character expresses words; how the
tone is presented
– Mercutio’s use of sexual puns presents him as a bawdy character.
– Mercutio’s deliberate use of explicitly vile sexual puns present him as
a bawdy character, one that is bent on debasing woman at any
opportunity, even if it is in front of the lovesick Romeo.
Analyse how techniques work together for effect
• How language techniques work with prosodic features
• How camera work and sound present a character
• Mercutio’s deliberate use of explicitly vile sexual puns
present him as a bawdy character, one that is bent on
debasing woman at any opportunity, even if it is in front of
the lovesick Romeo. Additionally, the Mercutio stresses the
word ‘prick’ to embody his hatred of woman.
• Mercutio’s deliberate use of the explicitly vile sexual pun
‘prick’ is heightened by the stress he places on this
monosyllabic word, thus accentuating his hatred for for
woman, even if it is in front of the lovesick Romeo.
• Accentuated, heightened, made more profound,
reinforced, underscored, emphasized, ect.
Showing whole text knowledge
• The examiner wants to see that you know the play—plot,
character, themes, setting, context
• Helps make your paragraphs less mechanical
– Basic: In act one, scene four of Romeo & Juliet, Mercutio and
Romeo’s relationship is presented as brotherly. We witness In
this scene the actions of the two friends prior to their trip to the
masked ball of the rival Capulets.
– Better: At the beginning of act one, scene four of Shakespeare’s
Romeo and Juliet, whilst preparing to venture to the Capulet
ball, Romeo and Mercutio’s undying devotion to one another is
revealed to us. This sincere and passionate devotion is
important at this stage in the play because their bond is later
highlighted when the two friends defend each other's ‘honour
in act three, scene one, traditionally seen as the climax of the
play. Thus, their presentation as brothers in this scene builds
the later stages of the plot, helping establish a heightened
sense of tension in the upcoming scenes.
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