Living Alone, Cohabiting, And Marriage Reasons for More Unmarrieds Nearly all Americans say that our families are very important to us. Today’s “postmodern” family is characterized by a diversity of family forms. “single” = being unmarried. Statistics Canada (2011) In 2011, 46.4% of the population aged 15 and over was legally married, while 53.6% was unmarried In 1981, 60.9% of the population aged 15 and over was married, while 39.1% was unmarried. Being Single Women are no longer considered a “spinster” and “old maid” In the 1950s, if a young woman wasn’t married by the age of 25, she was considered an oddity Singlehood has its upsides and downsides: Singles: Their Various Living Arrangements Living Alone Has increased —up from 8% in 1940. Living apart together (LAT) a couple is engaged in a long-term relationship but each partner maintains a separate dwelling. Singles: Their Various Living Arrangements Living with parents The % has increased dramatically Cultural and economic reasons Group or Communal Living designed to provide enhanced opportunities for social support and companionship DePaulo Singlism = ways in which single people are stereotyped, stigmatized, ignored, and discriminated against. Defines “single” in 2 ways: Legally vs. socially single Cohabitation and Family Life Cohabitation: Nonmarrieds living together One of the most important changes in family life in the past 40 years By 2008, an estimated 58 percent of 30-to 44-year-olds had lived with an opposite sex partner at some time in their lives—up from 33 percent in 1987 This trend is expected to increase. The Cohabiting Relationship Less likely to say they are happy with their relationships Find their relationships less fair Higher incidence of depression Place greater importance on sexual frequency Have more sex outside the relationship The Cohabiting Relationship Relationship quality of “long-term” cohabiting couples (together for at least 4 years) differ little from marrieds in conflict levels, amount of interaction, or relationship satisfaction For both marrieds and long-term cohabitors, relationship satisfaction declines with the addition of children to the household. Marriage: From Social Institution to Private Relationship Marital Status: The Changing Picture The proportion of Americans age 18 and over who are married has declined significantly People are also much more likely to be older at age of first marriage. Reasons for Getting Married (Taylor et al, 2007) Survey Question: “Why did you decide to get married rather than just live together?” Beliefs that living together was 49% wrong/religion/upbringing/social norms Love & commitment 24 Had children (expecting)/wanted children 10 It was time/easier/just wanted to 10 Make a legal commitment 2 Young & stupid 2 Financial reasons/health benefits 1 Other (misc) 8 Don’t know 5 Wedding ceremony reinforces the idea that the marriage is a permanent bond Family, friends, and witnesses affirm the acceptance and legitimacy of the union Marital Happiness, Success, & Health Marital stability vs. marital satisfaction Measuring marital satisfaction is important for 2 reasons: 1. longitudinal studies show that marital unhappiness is a good predictor of divorce. 2. marital unhappiness is linked to a variety of problematic outcomes, including inadequate parenting, psychological distress, and poor physical health How Marriages Change Throughout the Life Course First year of marriage involves basic adjustments After five years, approximately 10% of first marriages end in divorce, and 25% do so by the 10th year of marriage Marriage and Children Marital satisfaction tends to decrease after a couple has children. Most parents experience more frequent conflicts and disagreements after having children than do childless spouses. What Couples Fight About Men women give them the silent treatment, bring up things the mean have done in the remote past, Women forget important dates (such as birthdays and anniversaries) don’t work hard enough at their jobs