Emotional Intelligence: The
Human & Distinguishing
Dimension of Leadership &
Client Relationships
1
Jon Morse
210-286-7041
TheCenterForSuccess.com
LEADERSHIP through EI
Behavioral Assessments (pre-hire & development)
Group / team exercises & workshops
Wellness, individual & business coaching
Helping guests “kick back” in Fredericksburg
A Place In Time B&B
LEADERSHIP through EI
Goals & Agenda
•
•
•
•
•
Characteristics of a great leader
Emotional Intelligence overview
Become your own 3 Second Coach
What’s in it for me and my organization?
Feedback and Drawing
3
LEADERSHIP through EI
Leadership Characteristics
• Sticky note
• Write one characteristic of an
outstanding leader you’ve worked
with on your sticky note
• Hang on to them
4
LEADERSHIP through EI
What Do We mean by EI?
“The capacity for recognizing our
own feelings and those of
others, for motivating
ourselves, and for managing
emotions well in ourselves and
in our relationships.”
(Goleman)
5
LEADERSHIP through EI
What IS IQ, EQ, EI?
• Performance Success:
– IQ = 4-10%
– Expertise = 10-15 %
– EQ or EI = 80%
– Too much college,
too little kindergarten . . .
6
What we know about IQ
 Predicts school grades relatively well
 Peaks in late teens
 Helps one get into top universities
 Executive levels typically require higher IQ
 Stable over time
 Poor predictor of job success
 Does not predict happiness in life
7
EI / EQ – Some Facts
 Empirically linked to superb job performance
 Relates directly to success in life
 Is a critical component to a leader’s success
 Different than IQ; EQ can be changed and
raised
8
LEADERSHIP through EI
EI Research
• EI accounts for 75% of Job Success
• AT&T found nearly 60% of job performance is
linked to EI
• Pepsi division leaders outperformed targets
by 15%
• L’Oreal realized $91,370 increase per head
for sales and had 63% less turnover
• Hallmark staff were 25% more productive
9
LEADERSHIP through EI
Emotional Intelligence
Four-Quadrant Model
Self
Awareness
Management
Self
Awareness
Self
Management
Others
Other
Awareness
Relationship
Management
LEADERSHIP through EI
Belsten 24 Quadrant EI Model
CORTEX
LEADERSHIP through EI
(reason/logic/IQ)
LIMBIC SYSTEM
(emotion)
BRAINSTEM
(survival)
CEREBELLUM
HIPPOCAMPUS
(automatic movements)
(events stored)
AMYGDALA
(emotional memory)
Brain Development and Emotional Development
Brain Stem
(Breathing, heart rate)
12
LEADERSHIP through EI
• The physically lower
limbic system, which
rules emotions, can
hijack the higher
mental functions of
the neocortex
Hijacking
• MRI’s have shown
that the “hot”
emotional centers of
the brain can
interfere with the
“cool” cognitive
processes of the
brain
• Heart rate, breathing,
reflexes, decrease in
working memory
(RAM)
13
A RELATIONSHIP EXISTS
BETWEEN:
Intentions -> Emotions -> Behavior
Feelings impact behavior
14
LEADERSHIP through EI
Law of Hardwiring
• Emotion comes before thought
• We feel before we think
15
LEADERSHIP through EI
3 Second Coach tm
16
LEADERSHIP through EI
3 Second Coach tm
•
•
•
Assess
Commit
Execute
17
LEADERSHIP through EI
Assess
• Self-coach
• Observe non-conflict situations
• Pay close attention to your physical
reactions
• Practice scanning situations and people
• Triggers & Voices
18
LEADERSHIP through EI
Assess
• Mood is a framework or background
- emotion is a reaction to a situation.
• Your self coach must become aware
of your triggers.
• Learn to self talk
• Certain voices appear over and over
19
LEADERSHIP through EI
Assess your Triggers
• Hot Words / Buttons
• Perceived Criticism
• Illness/ Physical Conditions
• Situations
Beware of Multiple Triggers
20
LEADERSHIP through EI
Assess: What are your hot buttons?
•
•
•
•
•
It makes me angry when….
I don’t like it when people…
I feel offended when…
I think it’s rude to…
At work, I wish people would….
21
LEADERSHIP through EI
Assess: What are your hot buttons?
• At work, I think it would be a better
place if people would stop…
• It makes me crazy when…
• If people would only…
• It makes me angry when people say…
• I get irritated when I come into work
and…
22
LEADERSHIP through EI
Assess: What are your hot buttons?
• Why is it useful to identify our triggers?
• Our teammates’ triggers?
• What steps can we take to overcome
our triggers or our emotional reactions
to triggers?
• How can being aware of our
teammates’ triggers help our team?
23
LEADERSHIP through EI
Assess: What are your hot buttons?
• How can being aware of our
teammates’ triggers improve our
interactions?
• What steps can we take to understand
our teammates’ triggers?
• Under what circumstances are our
triggers more likely to be a problem
and set off a negative emotional
reaction?
24
LEADERSHIP through EI
Assess or Pause
Pausing Self-Control
Behave
according to our intentions
25
LEADERSHIP through EI
Assess
• Breathe
• Physically Shift Body
• Seek information
26
LEADERSHIP through EI
Commit
– Do you commit or do you let
someone else decide?
– Is someone else in control?
– What is your intention?
– Are you staying in sync with
your values?
– Are you behind the wheel?
27
LEADERSHIP through EI
Commit with Optimism
Research has linked optimism
with:
– High Performance
– Happiness
– Authenticity
– Quality of Relationships
– Emotional Intelligence
28
LEADERSHIP through EI
Commit
with Optimism
Optimism Assumption:
“I can do something to change this
situation for the better.”
versus
“ Probably nothing I do will make
any difference.”
29
LEADERSHIP through EI
Commit with Optimism
Optimism-EI link: Optimism
directly affects both…
–How we scan/assess
–What we see (what we
look for)
30
LEADERSHIP through EI
Execute
• How do we get really, really,
really good at execution?
31
LEADERSHIP through EI
EQ + Execution = Results
When people strengthen their Emotional
Intelligence with a 3 Second Coach:
• They perform better
• Treat each other better
• Get more out of going to work
It helps create an environment in which
higher performance is achieved and
everybody wins.
32
EQ - What is in it for me?
 Deal with others more effectively
 Handle daily demands better
 Greater goal achievement
 Feel better about yourself and others
 Have a better attitude
 Enhance performance
 Just sleep better
33
EQ – What is in it for
my organization?
Without high EQ proficiency, it is highly unlikely
an organization can effectively cope with:
 Pressure from competition
 Intricacies of building effective teams
 Handling conflict
 Fostering confidence
 Managing change
 Building ‘esprit de corps’
34
LEADERSHIP through EI
Based on what you’ve heard
today….
Give me one example of
behavior change you are
going to commit to?
35
LEADERSHIP through EI
Let’s wrap it up
• Assess this experience…complete
evaluation
• Drawing for the book = business cards
• Let’s talk
36
LEADERSHIP through EI
Book Drawing
EQ vs. IQ Exercise
37
Emotional Intelligence: The
Human & Distinguishing
Dimension of Leadership &
Client Relationships
38
Jon Morse
210-286-7041
TheCenterForSuccess.com