Nonviolent Communication And motivational

Chapter 5
Allie Lyman
 Goal:
To encourage change talk and
discourage resistance talk
Both coaches and clients need to make the case
for change.
 Expressing
 Developing Discrepancy
 Rolling with Resistance
 Supporting Self-Efficacy
 Through
empathy we help expand client
awareness, create openness and facilitate
 MI starting premise: Change Talk
 Empathy and Change Talk combo helps to get
the client past a point where they feel
 Make sure to avoid pity and sympathy when
trying to be empathetic
“I feel sorry for you”
“I feel your pain”
“I respect your pain”
Making observations, not evaluations
Express feelings, not thoughts
“I failed to exercise last week”
“I went to the gym one time last week”
“I feel that my boss is controlling”
Identify needs, not strategies
“I need to stop at the store”
 “I need to work out everyday”
Make requests, not demands
“Would you be willing to tell me what you heard me
 “What agreements would you be willing to make with
regard to exercise in the coming week?”
 Refer
to page 66 and 67 for good lists
of feeling and universal needs words.
 Open
Ended Questions (OEQs)
50% of your question in an MI should be open ended
 Reflective
Simple Reflections – flat mirror
Amplified Reflections – concave mirror
Double-Sided Reflections – trifold mirror
Shifted-Focus Reflections – periscope
 Decisional
Listening Statements
Page 69: Quantitative Rating System
 Rulers
On a scale from 1 to 10…
 “People
do not resist change, they resist
being changed”
 Communication patterns that interfere with
 Shifts that may assist in coaches to roll with
From correction to connection
From competence to confidence
From causes to capacities
From counter-force to counterbalance.
 Self-efficacy
is just as important as lasting
change and helping clients become their best
 Empathy begins the process of supporting selfefficacy
Quiets judgmental and nay-saying internal voices
 Developing
discrepancy and rolling with
resistance follow
Continue process without getting bogged down by
their own thinking and feeling process
 Belief
in goals will create movements to action