GROWING SPIRITUALLY
Lesson 12: Self-control
Last Week: “A Gentle Approach”
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Gentleness is controlling how we react to other
people.
It means that we are mild, humble and self controlled
towards others.
Prov 15:1 – A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh
word stirs up anger.
 Be understanding; be gracious, not judgmental; be tender;
be teachable; don’t retaliate.
 When you share your faith with others, respect them.
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Today’s Lesson: “Developing Self-control”
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Just what does the Bible mean by “self-control”.
How to develop self control:
Identify your problem and admit to it.
 Put your past behind you.
 Challenge your feelings.
 Believe you can change.
 Avoid temptation.
 Trust in God’s power.

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Why can’t I …
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Many of our problems are caused by a lack of selfcontrol.
Why can’t I ___________?
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get more done; control my temper; break that habit; get out
of debt; read my Bible more?
We are our own biggest problem!
Consider David’s life. Was he self-controlled?
Self-controlled: 1 Sam 24:1-15; 1 Sam 26:1-20.
 Lacked self-control: 2 Sam 11:2-5; 2 Sam 11:6-25.
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Are your walls “broken down”
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Prov 25:28 - Like a city whose walls are broken down
is a man who lacks self-control . NIV
We have all experienced the effect of a lack of self-control
at some point in our lives.
 Most of us probably sense that we lack self-control in at
least one aspect of our lives right now.
 The result may be that you feel:
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Overwhelmed by circumstances and pressure.
Defenseless and vulnerable.
Scared, stressed or uncertain.
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2 Peter 1:5-7
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5 … make every effort to
add to your faith goodness;
and to goodness,
knowledge; 6 and to
knowledge, self-control;
and to self-control,
perseverance; and to
perseverance, godliness; 7
and to godliness, brotherly
kindness; and to brotherly
kindness, love. NIV
Growing Spiritually Lesson 12 - Self Control
Knowledge
• from God’s Word and
how to apply it
Self-control
• of my thoughts,
emotions and my
behavior
Perseverance
• enduring life’s
circumstances
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1 Cor 9:24-27
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24 Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only
one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. 25
Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training.
They do it to get a crown that will not last; but we do it to get
a crown that will last forever. 26 Therefore I do not run like a
man running aimlessly; I do not fight like a man beating the air.
27 No, I beat my body and make it my slave so that after I
have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for
the prize. NIV
What do you think Paul is talking about here?
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1 Cor 9:24-27
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Could it be knowledge, self-control and
perseverance?
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Practice self control so that you will not be “disqualified” from the
race (vs 27)
Our lives require “self-control”
Self control requires “strict training” (vs 25)
We are to live our lives in such a way as to achieve an “eternal
prize” (vs 25)
We know what is required to achieve the prize (vs 26)
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“Self-controlled” translation
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“self-controlled” is typically translated from 2 Greek words:
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sophron (so'-frone); sophroneo (so-fron-eh'-o); sophronos (so-fron'-oce)
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nephaleos (nay-fal'-eh-os); nephalios (nay-fal'-ee-os);
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safe (sound) in mind, i.e. self-controlled (moderate as to opinion or passion).
1 Tim 3:2,11; Titus 1:8; 2:2
sober, i.e. (figuratively) circumspect.
1 Tim 3:2,11; Titus 2:2
1 Tim 3:2 – Now the overseer must be above reproach,
husband
ofof
Circumspect the
– aware
and heedful
but one wife, temperate, self-controlled, respectable,circumstances;
hospitable,
able to
prudent.
teach, NIV
The most typical meaning and use is “self controlled; clear minded;
temperate; discrete; circumspect”
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Titus 2:1-6
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2:1 You must teach what is in accord with sound doctrine. 2
Teach the older men to be temperate, worthy of respect, selfcontrolled, and sound in faith, in love and in endurance. 3
Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they
live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to
teach what is good. 4 Then they can train the younger women
to love their husbands and children, 5 to be self-controlled and
pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their
husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God. 6
Similarly, encourage the young men to be self-controlled.
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Titus 2
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Titus chapter 2 contains the use of these words
repeatedly.
We are to teach “self-control”.
 This is in accordance with sound doctrine.
 We are to teach self-control to everyone: old and young
alike.
 The older are to teach the younger.
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Why so much emphasis to teach “self-control”?
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Developing self-control
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So…how do we develop self-control?
There are many things that are important:
Identify your problem and admit to it.
 Put your past behind you.
 Challenge your feelings.
 Believe you can change.
 Avoid temptation.
 Trust in God’s power.

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Admit your problem

James 1:14-15 – but each one is tempted when, by
his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed.
NIV
Accept responsibility for your lack of self control.
 Admit your problem.
 We are lured by temptation because we want to do
whatever that temptation is.
 It is what we desire.
 The only way to overcome that temptation is through the
fruit of the Spirit we call self-control.
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Put your past behind you
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Phil 3:13-14 – …Forgetting what is behind and
straining toward what is ahead, 14 I press on toward
the goal to win the prize for which God has called me
heavenward in Christ Jesus. NIV
This passage says forget about the past.
 No matter how many times you have failed, keep trying.
 Forget about the past and try again.

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Challenge your feelings
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Titus 2:12 – It teaches us to say "No" to ungodliness
and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled,
upright and godly lives in this present age, NIV
“It” refers to God’s grace which teaches us to deny our
worldly passions.
 Talk back to your feelings.
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The old phrase “just say No” is Biblical.
Don’t give your feelings so much authority. They are
unreliable.
 Rely on God’s grace to help you deny your selfish desires.
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Believe you can change
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Phil 4:13 – I can do everything through him who gives
me strength. NIV
It must be said again…the fruit of the Spirit begin with your
thought life.
 The way you think determines the way you feel, and the
way you feel determines the way you act.
 Mark 9:23 – “Everything is possible for him who believes.”
NIV
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Avoid temptation
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Eph 4:27 – and do not give the devil a foothold. NIV
While this text is speaking about “anger”, the instruction is
true for any temptation: avoid it.
 Stay away from situations that weaken your self-control.
 Plan in advance to avoid situations that tempt you.
 If you cannot plan for it and all of a sudden you find
yourself in a vulnerable circumstance, then flee!
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Depend on God’s power
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Gal 5:16 - So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not
gratify the desires of the sinful nature. NIV
This verse does not say that you won’t have desires that are
of the sinful nature.
 Let the Spirit direct your life.
 And you will not “gratify” those desires.
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Phil 2:13 for it is God who works in you to will and to
act according to his good purpose. NIV
It is God who gives you the desire to do right.
 It is God who gives you the power to do what is right.
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Summary
1 Cor 9:27
No, I beat
my body
and make it
my slave so
that after I
have
preached to
others, I
myself will
not be
disqualified
for the prize.




Many of our problems are caused by a lack of selfcontrol.
The result may be that you feel: overwhelmed;
defenseless; vulnerable; scared or uncertain.
Self-control is essential to leading effective and
productive lives.
In order to develop self control, try the following:






Identify your problem and admit to it.
Put your past behind you.
Challenge your feelings.
Believe you can change.
Avoid temptation.
Trust in God’s power.
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Memory verse: Titus 2:11-12
For the grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all
men. It teaches us to say "No" to ungodliness and worldly
passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in
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this present age