Gendered Lives 2: Home Early American Social History Term 2, Week 7 Gender Relations • How defined? • Patriarchy • ideology of spheres. • Conceptions of masculinity and femininity The ‘Ideal’ Family The Savage Family Edward Hyde, Lord Cornbury (1661-1723) Governor of NY and NJ, 1701-1707 Regional Differences • opportunities for women • Marriage patterns • life expectancy Courtship • Certain amount of free choice, though parents could be v. influential, esp in New England • Pre-martial sex common (‘bundling’); betrothal like marriage • Women could refuse marriage proposals but not if pregnant • Courtship becomes more formal in the 18thC, more chaperoned, less sexual Reflections on Courtship and Marriage (Philadelphia 1746) • That unhappy matches are often occasioned by meer mercenary views in one or both of the parties; or by the headstrong motives of ill conducted passion. • That by a prudent and judicious proceeding in our addresses to a young lady of good natural temper, a probable foundation may be laid for making her an agreeable companion, a steady friend and a good wife Marriage ‘Benjamin and Eleanor Lanning’ Charles Wilson Peale, 1788 Benjamin Wadsworth, A WellOrdered Family (Boston, 1712). • Husband and wife should be patient one toward another. If both are truly pious, yet neither of them is perfectly holy, in such cases a patient, forgiving, forbearing spirit is very needful. . . . When, therefore, they quarrel or disagree, then they do the Devil's work; he is pleased at it, glad of it. But such contention provokes God; it dishonors Him; it is a vile example before inferiors in the family; it tends to prevent family prayer. • The husband's government ought to be gentle and easy, and the wife's obedience ready and cheerful. The husband is called the head of the woman. It belongs to the head to rule and govern. Wives are part of the house and family, and ought to be under the husband's government. Yet his government should not be with rigor, haughtiness, harshness, severity, but with the greatest love, gentleness, kindness, tenderness that may be. Though he governs her, he must not treat her as a servant, but as his own flesh; he must love her as himself. Look e’re you leap, or a History of Lewd Women (Boston 1762) • “for no sooner can they lisp but they can lie, and are taught by their mothers to disguise the truth” • “they are not what they appear to be. For if a man aims at riches, she shall pretend to a great fortune, tho’ she is worse than nothing; and run in debt to make a good appearance…if she can persuade the deluded lover to make her his wife, he shall be arrested for all these thing before he has been married a week…and if a man be to be taken by beauty, she will both wash and paint, and patch and dress and do everything that may make her appear fair…if he chance to marry her, he’ll find…when the morning-light comes to discover her he has got a very Devil in his arms.” Women’s domestic role Elizabeth and Mary Freake Mr Freake ‘Rachel Weeping’, 1772 Charles Wilson Peale (1741-1827) Importance of Class Childbirth Children Education • Forms of education – Home – Formal schooling – Literacy and numeracy – Higher education Earliest College Foundation in each colony • Harvard (Mass) 1636 • William and Mary (Virginia) 1693 • Yale (Conn) 1701 • Princeton (NJ) 1746 • College of Philadelphia (U Penn) 1751 • Columbia (NY) 1754 • Brown (RI) 1764 • College of Charleston (South Carolina) 1770 Harvard (1767) William & Mary (1770) Conclusions • Domestic sphere seen as women’s sphere, but men retained nominal control. • Women’s lives quite constrained by 18thC gender attitudes • Family as a means for female selfexpression