ISSN 2039-2117 (online)
ISSN 2039-9340 (print)
Mediterranean Journal of Social Sciences
MCSER Publishing, Rome-Italy
Vol 6 No 1 S1
January 2015
Bullying Behaviour in the School Milieu
Machelle L. Shelton
B Ed Hons UNISA
machelle.shelton32@gmail.com
Doi:10.5901/mjss.2015.v6n1s1p42
Abstract
In this paper the researcher explores and examines the ‘bullying’ behaviour patterns of not only the child but the teacher and
the principal and various other staff members as well as parents, in the school setting. A study of various reasons for bullying,
techniques and types of bullying will be analysed. It is a well-known fact that bullying is increasing in the school milieu. We
need to analyse and respond positively to the situation and discover methods which can be used effectively to discourage this
behaviour, when doing so. In the past, ‘isolation’ was generally the cause and comfort zone for the bully but as things change
bullying has now crept into many other areas and today’s generation finds new ways to torment and intimidate others on a
continuous basis. Being bullied can change your life in the long-term in distressing, demoralizing and detrimental ways. We
need to find a solution to this injurious situation before it becomes so overwhelming that it cannot in the long term be restrained.
1. Introduction
It is perfectly normal to have some form of sibling rivalry or ‘peer’ pressure happening between children or even teens at
various times, on different occasions or even in a variety of places, throughout their lives. Peer relationships play a
fundamental role in the child’s happiness and emotional well-being. Especially as they develop and mature and as their
relationships change. It is though not normal to be bullied by someone who derives pleasure from hurting others, whether
you are a child, teen or adult. No one should be put in the position where they become the victim of a self-centred
malicious individual who thrives on offending and hurting someone else for their own pleasure. It is important that one
looks out for, tracks and monitors the behaviour patterns of not only children but teens and adults as well who
demonstrate such performance, so that a record can be kept on this calamitous behaviour and something can be done
about it.
Chances are that somewhere along the line whether it is during your childhood, as a teen or as an adult with a
career, you will be bullied. The problem is though that unless you are on the receiving end of being exploited,
manipulated or abused, you are unlikely to realise that it is taking place.
As stated by Professor Kimberly Frazier of Clemson University: (in Frazier)
“The following must be present for negative actions to be labelled bullying:
1. An imbalance of power between the perpetrator and victim.
2. Systematic and long term attacks.
3. Those being bullied finding it difficult to defend or retaliate against those inflicting the bullying behaviour.”
According to: (Little 2008:51) “Bullying appears to be on the increase in a great many schools, among girls and
boys. It’s making many lives miserable, and often leads to depression and despair. Some of it is the typical, physical
intimidating behaviour that many of us identify as bullying but a great deal is more subtle and attacks the emotions and
self-esteem of the victim.“ Little further points out that bullying takes many forms, “some of which may seem trivial to
someone else, but they can drive the victim to desperation.”
Relating to design and research methods, it is eminent to comprehend, appreciate and recognise how bullying and
being bullied affect the wellbeing and functioning of not only the youth but the adults within the school environment as
well. The researcher sought to use the methods of observation as well as multiple reference sources to better understand
the psychological and social problems regarding not only the victim but the bully as well. Considerable research done
qualitatively has a strong orientation to everyday events and research undertaken quantitatively, in the field of bullying, is
plentiful. As a qualitative research project, the researcher was interested in understanding how the various individuals
respond to and what action they take to protect themselves.
The aim of the research was to explore the perspectives of learners, teachers, principals and other members of
staff with regard to physical and verbal abuse while being bullied in the school mileu.
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ISSN 2039-9340 (print)
Mediterranean Journal of Social Sciences
MCSER Publishing, Rome-Italy
Vol 6 No 1 S1
January 2015
The researcher’s choice of research sprung from various learner accounts and descriptions of: who bullies and
who is being bullied, self-descriptions of being victimised themselves; self-accounts of psychological distress from
learners and staff members; and from co-worker accounts of adjustment problems within their own working environments
[relating to the learners and other staff members they have to work and cope with]. The researcher has used this
technique because of the situation she found herself in. She sees the children every day and being a teacher herself, is
able to relate to the situation other teachers find themselves in as well. The researcher’s objective is to try to understand
reasons for bullying on the playground and in the classrooms as well as other areas of the school. The significance of the
research is located in suggestions to identify early warning signs of bullying, types of bullying and finding remedies to
deal with the situations. Relevant audiences include other teachers and educators, not only in the same school but other
schools and educational institutions as well.
2. How Do We Define a Bully?
The stereotype for a bully is basically someone who gets pleasure out of ignominiously defeating someone else for their
own pleasure. Bullying could basically take the form of physically pounding on someone or verbally and emotionally or
subconsciously pounding them. Bullying can be a once off thing or it could be a continuous event in the Bullies life where
he/she continuously uses various methods to gain self-satisfaction. Often a bullying child will develop into a bullying adult.
(Dr Kevin Leman 2008:124) states that “…Bullies are insecure. They think that by putting others down (physically
or emotionally), they’ll feel better about themselves. They’ll feel more powerful…”
He further refers to the fact that bullies have changed dramatically over the past few years. Whereas once you
would be warned and then receive a black eye from a bully, things have changed to the point where bullies have become
‘different’, much more aggressive and usually there is no supervision (from parents or others) where the bully is
concerned.
Leman further suggests that: “bullies who are not stopped in their tracks merely become older bullies who are more
dangerous.” There are many actualities happening in schools and in society which is evidence of this. One just has to
take note of what is happening around you.
3. Bullying Techniques
Punching, kicking, slapping, shoving, pinching, biting scratching and pulling hair are some of the ‘subtle’ physical
attributes of bullying. But physical bullying also includes the mishandling, damaging or destroying of your personal items
and property. An example may be when a bully grabs your books and tosses it into a mud puddle or if they deliberately
break your hair comb and watch how you react to it. In adult practice it can take the form of getting close to your victim,
twisting their arm whilst grinding your speech through your teeth or a simple shove or push or even a nasty verbal remark
or warning. Bullying can escalate to the point of abuse, rape or even murder, depending on how far the Bully is willing to
go.
When the Bully exercises his/her ability to use pronounced and vile language against you to manipulate your
situation or to employ you into doing his/her will, we would refer to this as verbal bullying. Verbal bullying also does not
mean that the bully has to be in your presence or even in your vicinity it can mean that he/she can use techniques such
as spreading rumours, gossiping and telling lies about you or even spread embarrassing private truths about you or your
family and friends. Verbal bullying is a form of malicious intent as the bully not only wants to hurt the victim, but also
wants to change how other people see that person. Often the internet or cell phone plays a part in this form of bullying.
According to (McGraw 2008: 19):
“Verbal bullying may be one of the easier forms of bullying to get away with. And because it leaves no scars that people
can see, it’s harder for some to recognise when it happens. Verbal bullying hurts a person’s feelings and self-esteem
and can leave scars that last for years – for a life time, even. Many people who are the victims of verbal bullying have a
hard time ever truly liking themselves again or feeling good about the things they accomplish.
Verbal bullying is done to make you appear “strange” to other people – and even to yourself. Bullies aim their insults at
things about you that make you distinct from others, whether it’s your clothes, your voice, your skin colour, your weight
or anything else.”
Bullies often hide behind what they term as ‘making a joke’, when it comes to verbal bullying. They relate to things
such as weight, size, whether you wear glasses etc. (either making ‘jokes’ about it or labelling the person with a
distinctive yet coarse name) and they play on your insecurities. Habitually they ‘label’ you especially if you are from a
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certain racial or ethnic background. Often girls are bullied by boys because they are ‘weaker’ and ‘not as smart’!
Verbal bulling is a much more vicious form of abuse as it has profound implications, and can cause a lot more
harm than physical abuse and the outcome can sometimes be treacherous.
4. Why Bullies Bully
Bullies bully because, according to (McGraw 2008: 20), “of issues they have with themselves, not issues they have with
you”.
Your innocence in the bullying situation reveals and exposes the fact that there is a need to change something in
the bully which is causing a disturbance within him and not to change anything within yourself.
The bully’s behaviour elicits a response (positive or negative) from others. This is essential to him. His opinions
about himself together with the opinions expressed by others contribute to a positive or negative evaluation of his selfworth. The outcome of this evaluation is how the bully evaluates and regards himself whether it is poorly or highly,
successful or unsuccessful.
Bullies often bully because they feel inferior to someone who has achieved better than them either academically or
physically (sport situations), but they try not to show their covetousness and disguise it in a form of bullying.
Often there are a group of people (adults) or children supporting the bully, not because they want to but because
they don’t have the courage to stand up to the bully and to say that picking on you is wrong. They fear for themselves.
They also become dangerous to themselves as they lose their self-identity and “forget that they are individuals with the
power to stand on their own and do the right thing.”
5. The ABC’s of Bullying
No matter how many methods are used or how many ways bullying can be explained there are some fundamental
pointers which can be revealed:
- Bullies usually harm those they see as “weaker” or “different”. (Because they: are sometimes physically
bigger; or are more popular than others, they have larger groups of friends; they come from richer families or
are part of a more social or athletic group.)
- Bullies do harm on purpose. (Usually with the intent to hurt or embarrass someone else.)
- Bullies don’t do it just once. (The behaviour patterns are repeated. They repeat them because it makes them
feel better about themselves.)
- Bullies love an audience. (Often it may be a one on one situation, but most times bullies don’t just want to
prove they have power over you, they want to make sure that other people know that they have, or think that
they have, some sort of control over you.)
- Bullies commonly have a negative, poor self-concept and this is disadvantageous to their existence as the
self-concept is the principle whereby the individual differentiates, attributes meaning to, evaluates, anticipates
and creates their behaviour patterns throughout life.
6. Relationship Bullying
This is a very important form of bullying. It can take place between children and it often takes place between adults
without them realising what is happening. Often though, they do realise the circumstances but are usually caught in a
situation where they have little power to do anything about it without hurting someone else.
In relationship bullying the Bully is using his/her social status to hurt someone else. It often involves keeping you
out of other social groups, forcing you to do something you don’t want to do, spreading rumours and insults about you or
someone else. It is intentional and dangerous. Unless something is done about this the problem just escalates. Bullies in
their criminality, as their behaviour is a crime, try to ‘steal’ your identity and manipulate you as a person.
Relationship bullying often takes place in the workplace with the ‘Boss’, as it is easy for them to use their social
position to hurt or degrade others and to make them seem inferior. This in turn empowers the ‘Boss’ and makes him/her
feel superior. It does not matter whether he/she is capable of doing the job or whether he/she is incompetent, his/her
social status and position gives him/her ‘power’ over you and causes you to feel inferior and puts you in a position of
deciding what is more important, your feelings or the matter of keeping your job (and even helping others around you
keep their jobs).
One often can distinguish other bullies in the school as well when it comes to the teachers or staff members.
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MCSER Publishing, Rome-Italy
Vol 6 No 1 S1
January 2015
Sometimes a teacher will befriend another teacher or staff member who can be defined or seen as being a bully, so that
they feel secure that they themselves won’t be bullied. When the teachers or staff members, begin to take sides with
each other that is when a ‘festering’ could occur in the midst of what is supposed to be a union or group effort.
According to (Little 2008:52), a new type of bully has come to the fore. This is the ‘pampered bully’. Where the
usual bully has low self-esteem or unresolved anger, the new bully derives from indulged backgrounds and are bullying
others because of their ‘inflated self-image’. These children are the spoilt, nasty children who come from pampered
backgrounds and have pampering parents.
7. Why Do Kids Bully?
Some reasons are:
- Enjoyment, they get pleasure out of bullying
- They get a buzz out of making people feel uncomfortable, putting them down, intimidating or hurting them
- The accomplishment of power, revenge or joy
- Letting off steam or getting rid of their anger
- They are opinionated and therefore think they have the right to bully
- Their own attitude extends to the point where they cannot accept that you are different in some way or that
you have your own opinion
- They often have a hard time dealing with their own feelings and therefore take out their anger or sadness on
you (feelings of insecurity, or emotional or mental weakness)
- Internal emotional conflict
- Bullying someone else makes them feel better about themselves
- They like to assert themselves over someone whom they believe to be inferior or not a worthy person
- They do not or cannot relate to long term consequences of their behaviour
- They are being bullied themselves
- They are attention seekers
- They enjoy being part of a group who are intimidators and like to victimise others
- They are trying to gain status or eliminate rivals
- They like to be idolised albeit by a bunch of ‘losers'
- They bully the weak because they fear their own weaknesses
- They envy someone and therefore need to denigrate them
- They fear someone else’s strengths and popularity and have a need to nullify that
8. Is a Child Being Bullied - Signs to Look for
-
Child becomes withdrawn
Child becomes depressed
Child too scared to go around on his own
Child becomes snappy with the mouth
Sudden outbursts of anger
Child begins to pick on or bully other children
Child losing weight (food source is being bullied away)
Child gaining weight (food source becomes a crutch)
Child won’t go to school
Complains of sore tummy or headaches
Child’s homework not done
Child’s school marks deteriorate
Child becomes very emotional when spoken to
Signs of bruises, scratches and cuts
Ripped or damaged clothes
Wetting or soiling self or bed
Nightmares
Anxious behaviour and withdrawal symptoms
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MCSER Publishing, Rome-Italy
Vol 6 No 1 S1
January 2015
Child starts to call for things which do not fit in with the child’s normal life patterns or wants and needs
Child starts to act deviously and becomes circuitous, meandering around various strange and unusual
behaviour patterns not normal to the child
- Child begins to tell lies or hides information
It is very important to look for signs of bullying when it comes to the child who can be described as ‘different’, i.e. a
child who has behavioural issues for e.g an Autistic or Aspergic child (or various other symptoms) or the child who has
some form of disability. Children with disabilities, especially those with learning disabilities and mental retardation are
especially vulnerable to the antics of bullies. These children often show feelings of loneliness and are prone to be
‘outcasts’. Disabled learners are prone to misinterpret cues from their peers and sometimes respond inappropriately and
this may ‘fuel a Bullies fire’. It is also possible that a child in this situation may misinterpret the situation and in actual fact
think that the bully is their ‘friend’.
-
9. Differences between Peer Aggression and Bullying
According to (Woolfolk 2007:78) there are several forms of aggression:
Instrumental aggression where there is an intention to gain an object or a privilege, (e.g. a child trying to get in front
of the line). The intention would be to get to the front of the line without hurting another child but this is not always
possible and the hurt may occur anyway.
Hostile aggression where the intention is to inflict harm. This may either happen in the form of overt aggression
which incorporates physical threats or attacks, (e.g. when someone threatens to beat you up).
Or relational aggression where social relations are threatened (e.g. when someone close threatens never to speak
to you again). Insults, gossip, exclusion, taunts – all form part of relational aggression and both boys and girls are
involved yet to different degrees through different ages.
Assertiveness and aggression should also not be confused as by being assertive the child is just affirming or
maintaining a legitimate right, (e.g. “That is my toy!”). But if the child reclaims the toy by bashing the other child on the
head, then he is being aggressive. Bullies tend to form when aggressive children believe that violence will be rewarded
so they use aggression to get what they want. Their belief is usually that violent retaliation is acceptable. The best way to
combat aggression in any form is to intervene early.
10. How Parents Unknowingly Encourage Bullying Behaviour
There are some parents who unknowingly bully their children into submission. This forms part of their parental authority
without them even realising it.
- The interesting theme to their conversation with the child in the case of having absolute control over them is:
“because I said so”. This encourages the child to want to have control over someone else.
- Threatening to slap or beat them severely. This teaches them to use violence to control other people or to be
afraid when they are threatened. Many times this violence extends into the bullies relationships with other
people.
- Parent who tease, torment and humiliate their children. This fuels the bully’s coffers with ways to tease and
label others.
- Dictate through use of fear. Teachers’ children to take what they want when they want it. The child can either
become weak and passive or scary and aggressive when someone threatens their comfort zone.
- Insisting on fierce competition: Teachers’ children that winning is everything and it’s better than being a loser;
Causes violent outbursts where a bully beats up other kids for importance sake.
- Teaching children that mistakes are bad. Causing an inferior complex in the child where he may start to think
that he is no good and will begin to behave in that manner.
- Consistently tell the child what to do and not allowing the child to learn to be independent and to think
positively. Child does not learn to think or solve problems for themselves so they will follow whatever others
tell them what to do and that can be very dangerous.
- Encourage the child to use violence against other children.
According to: (De Jager & Victor 2013:140) this is how you would raise a bully:
- Criticise often
- Rule by command and demand
- Ridicule your child’s effort
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- Sneer at his skill, size and sensitivity
- Ignore his feelings
- Severely punish even the smallest mistakes
- Cross examine your child after an incident
- Assume he is always lying
- Evoke fear frequently
- Engage in name-calling like “You are … lazy, stupid, disgusting, spoiled, a disgrace, a disappointment!”
- Make him sorry he told you the truth
- Always blame others
- Be loud and aggressive with others
- Tell racist, sexist, religious and other insensitive jokes
- Delight in every opportunity to cheat and to lie
A child who is constantly ‘bullied’ at home will, be it consciously or subconsciously, be filled with bitterness,
resentment or anger and may even hold a grudge. They will then impart their behaviour or feelings onto someone else
and the only environment that a child is in during a normal day is at school. So the chances are they will demonstrate and
express this behaviour in the school environment. Most times the child performing the disruptive and troublesome
behaviour is not actually aware of what they are doing. Often they are simply re-enacting what they deem to be normal
behaviour. (If someone does it to them why can’t they do it to someone else. Especially if it is the parent performing the
act on the child, why would the child then think it is wrong! If the child, displaying this behaviour, is encountered or
exposed in time, their behaviour can be corrected. If not, the behaviour patterns develop further and will follow them
throughout their lives.
11. Why Children don’t Reach out at School
Most children are afraid if they say something to the teachers or principal that they will be accused of ratting out other
kids. They should know that there is a difference. As McGraw states: (McGraw 2008: 156)
“Tattling is usually done just to make trouble for another child. If you’re reporting someone’s behaviour just to get
that person in trouble, you’re probably tattling. However, if you are letting an adult know about a situation that, if not
handled, could lead to trouble or danger, then you’re doing the right thing in opening your mouth.”
(McGraw 2008:156) states six good ideas why bringing adults at school into the mix is a good idea:
- The staff supervises and run the school
- Teachers can set rules
- Principals and teachers can talk with other students
- Adults can work with other adults
- Adults can keep your parents aware
- School staff sets the tone
(Gordon & Browne 2008:479) “Teasing and bullying can become disruptive in groups and programs. Teachers
need to be clear about what bullying is and how to respond to it early.” Repeated negative actions towards a child can
cause problems such as low esteem in the long term. “Over time the social costs to both bullies and victims include
impaired social understanding and problems with human relationships in adulthood”.
Although most bullying episodes are picked up in late childhood and adolescents its origins stem from early
childhood. It can be picked up in the behaviours of the younger child. Child programs such as conflict resolution
programmes can be implemented in preschools and junior schools to teach children how to express themselves and
listen to others in social situations. The programmes should deal with behaviour issues such as teasing, put-downs,
hitting, not sharing, and who should be the ‘boss’. Children should be taught how to socialise outside the home and family
environment. Children should be taught how to interact and identify with their peers who are like themselves thereby
learning from each other. Children should be able to make friends with whom they can identify. “Friends provide models
for imitation, for comparison and for confirmation of themselves, and they are a source of support.”
A child who bullies is one who does not fit into this profile and it is thus that the child needs attention for different
reasons and usually becomes the ‘bully’ looking for the attention.
Another reason why children don’t report bullying is that often the teacher reacts by being a bully themselves. This
causes fear and consternation in the child.
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12. Why Teachers do not Get Involved in and Why they Withdraw from Bullying Situations
According to: (Furnham 2012: 143)
“…in decision-making we go through various steps: we analyse the situation then decide on objectives next we decide
on how we are going to decide (who, when, how and where) and then search for good alternative solutions. We then
evaluate the alternatives, make a choice, evaluate it and learn from the consequences. One central question often
overlooked is how we decide – should we do it alone, call in experts, have a committee?”
Depending on how the teacher relates to the situation he finds himself in. Does he view the situation as a problem
where he needs to find a solution on the one hand, or does he rather make a decision where he will not get involved
because of the lengthy conclusions which may result from the problem in the first place.
In problem solving he will try to come up with a good solution. In decision making he will have to choose between
two situations, whether he will get involved or not and what the consequences will be for both. One has to take into
account that teachers usually have a personal recollection of situations which occurred before and how they were dealt
with and this will most certainly influence their decision. Also there may be a recollection of a similar situation where a coworker was a participant and the conclusion of that situation may affect his decision also (even though it may even be a
subconscious recollection of events).
Although we know that bullying can have detrimental effects on kids or even adults and that some never get over
being pushed around, we find that people often try to downplay the effects of bullying or even the fact that someone is
being a bully. This occurs simply because they do not know how to move forward or to handle the situation, or that they
may be more scared to take action pending on the results they visualise may transpire.
No matter whom the bullying effected and how they were bullied, even when it is over “the pain you feel in your
mind and spirit from being bullied can haunt a victim for years”. Victims don’t always remember what was said while being
bullied but they always remember how they felt at the time and for long afterwards.
13. Bullying from Above
According to: (Forbes), the experts say: “there’s a general lack of awareness about the bullying and the types of
behaviours the term encompasses. This often prevents people from realising that a boss or co-worker is a bully.” Dr
David Yamada, a professor at Suffolk University Law School and president of the New Workplace Institute, (in Forbes),
reiterates: “Often people don’t put the pieces together until it’s too late”.
The sad thing is, “while it is hard to quantify, workplace bullying is clearly costly for employees as well as
employers. Companies pay: in employee turnover, employee absenteeism and to a small extent, workers’ compensation
claims. Bullies can tarnish an organization’s reputation and ability to recruit, since word gets around when employees are
miserable and leaving in droves.”
These comportments definitely occur when it comes to schools. Various studies have shown that there are
occasions where bullying in a school seeps all the way through to the top management of the school as well as to the
principal. The fact is that where power regularities are evident, bullying is more likely to occur. It is then likely that
teachers will fear losing their jobs or fear that they will not be perceived as credible, reliable, dependable or trustworthy.
There is of course a consequence to the problem:
The teacher or worker in some cases suffers feelings of depression and betrayal and there is certainly loss of
productivity resulting from these feelings, all because of the bully’s bullying methods.
Some of these methods can be defined as such:
- Ridicule
- Exclusion
- Aggression
- Abuse of power
- Assigning inappropriate or over whelming tasks
- Hiding information with a result of poor performance
- Shaming
- Creating false allegations
Ronald Schouten and James Silver assert (in their works: “Almost a Psychopath”), Ten key indicators of the almost
psychopath (could these in fact be underlying signs of a bullies behaviour as well):
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1) Are they superficially charming and glib, with an answer for everything?
2) Is there a lack of empathy, i.e. an impaired ability to understand and appreciate the emotions of others and the
impact of their behaviour on other people?
3) Confronted with a difficult moral choice, do they more often or not rationalise and arrive at a decision to act in
their own self-interest?
4) Do they lie repeatedly, including when it is necessary or for minor reasons?
5) Are they conning and manipulative?
6) When they get criticized for something, is it always someone else’s fault?
7) When they cause harm or hurt to others is there a lack of true remorse?
8) Do they seem to have limited capacity to experience and express feelings for others or maintain relationships?
9) Do they find it easy to ignore responsibilities?
10) Do people and situations exist solely for the purpose of gratifying their needs and wants?
“What does bully leadership look like?
- Bully leadership is authoritative. It can be very uncomfortable.
- There is the overwhelming feeling of anger. It can mean slamming doors for effect. There can be psychological
bullying, like dropping statements that cause stress for a teacher at inappropriate times.
- It can mean undermining the efforts of teachers and jeopardizing their success. It can involve threatening and
abuse of power.
- Principal bullies often believe strongly that they are very capable leaders, and are unable to distinguish
between the qualities of good leadership and bullying. (in Donna Fry.)
- Often bully leaders believe that they are simply getting everyone on side, focusing on the current initiative.
They see success in their actions.
14. Signs which Show Something’s not Right: (in Donna Fry.)
-
-
Good teachers are being let go and weak teachers are being brought in. A bully principal needs teachers who
can be controlled. Teachers who stand up to them are dangerous.
Vulnerable teachers are doing extra work. New projects and ideas – are they being run by teachers whose
positions are in danger of termination? Are they (teachers) being pressured into taking on extra work with their
job on the line?
A pattern of attack on an initiative. Is an initiative consistently interrupted or questioned by a Principal? Who is
in charge of the initiative? Is this teacher being bullied by the principal?
Good people leave. Effective teachers will not stick around in this environment.
Senior management loses credibility when they unknowingly favour and promote the work of bullies.
Future leaders in the building need to take time to re-build trust, which means a longer time before issues of
student achievement are addressed. Children don’t have this kind of time to waste.
Desperate bullied teachers may behave unprofessionally out of frustration.
“Victims understand the power structure and the preferential treatment their “model Principal” receives from
upper management, and they are afraid to complain.” Having to find a new job and make changes in their
personal lives can be very daunting and difficult. Other problems develop as well caused by the results of
Bullying Principals and one of them is the long-term damaging effects on the school and even others
throughout a District. It needs to be realised that Teachers need a safe method of reporting bullying, without
fear of retribution.
Be informed
Bullies have support systems
Most have no consequences
Many are rewarded with promotions and stellar evaluations
Few are investigated
Even less are punished or terminated
15. Are Teachers being Bullied?
“Many people would be surprised to hear that the teachers who spend each day working to prevent bullying among
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students in schools can themselves be victims of bullying in the workplace.”
Teachers are most certainly targeted by bullies. Instead of being in a position where they could say: “Here I am
and I am willing to give all that I can to help you…” they find themselves being drained of every modicum of themselves
because of the egocentricity and self-regard of others. The bully comes in all forms, from the child who wants all the
attention to the co-worker who is too lazy to contribute, to the Head of Department who fancies enhancing his own
position, to the Principal who wants all the credit, and lastly the parent who thinks not only that the world belongs to them
but that the teacher owes them everything. The famous quotes: “My parents pay your salary! /I pay my fees and your
salary! / Teachers only work half days!/ I’ll sort her out… she’s picking on my child… she’s got a personality clash with my
child…!/ She’s such a lazy …so and so!” And so the word goes. Stand ready for the bully! A price to pay, when teaching
is a passion! It is amazing that so many still follow this passion.
16. Are Teachers Able to take a Stand Against Bullies
Teachers can most certainly help a child who is being bullied. It may not always be an easy task but there are some
procedures which could be followed. For instance, the most important is that the teacher show genuine concern, rules
should be firm but not harsh, be consistent, show respect for student and be available to talk. The school may even have
a particular policy relating to bullies in the school. Teachers have the chance to play a specific role in the children’s
personal and social development.
Some guidelines according to (Woolfolk 2007: 80) that the teacher can follow to help deal with aggression and
encourage cooperation:
- Present yourself as a non-aggressive model.
- Do not use threats of aggression to win obedience.
- When problems arise, model nonviolent conflict resolution strategies.
- Ensure that your classroom has enough space and appropriate materials for every student.
- Prevent overcrowding.
- Make sure prized toys or resources are plentiful.
- Remove or confiscate materials that encourage personal aggression, such as toy guns.
- Avoid highly competitive activities and evaluations.
- Make sure that students do not profit from aggressive behaviours.
- Comfort the victim of aggression and ignore the aggressor.
- Use reasonable punishment, especially with older students.
- Teach directly about positive social behaviours.
- Incorporate lessons on social ethic/morality through reading selections and discussions.
- Discuss the effects of antisocial actions such as stealing, bullying, and speaking rumours.
- Provide models and encouragement – role play appropriate conflict resolution.
- Build self-esteem by building skills and knowledge.
- Seek help for students who seem especially isolated and victimised.
- Provide opportunities for learning tolerance and cooperation.
- Emphasize the similarities among people rather than the differences.
- Set up group projects that encourage co-operation.
17. Ways to Deal with Teachers who Bully
According to: (Sheri Gordon)
- Be sure to document bullying incidents
- Reassure and support your child
- Take steps to build your child’s self-esteem
- Talk with your child before taking steps to resolve the issue
- Follow the chain of command
- Consider requesting a meeting with the teacher
- Be sure to express your concern but allow others to engage in the conversation
- Take the complaint higher if the situation doesn’t improve or the bullying is sever in nature
- Continue to go up the chain of command if you don't procure any results
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18. How the Victim Feels
Victims have a whole range of emotions from having low esteem, feeling anxious, lonely, insecure and unhappy to more
detrimental feelings such as physical illness to emotional illness and sometimes it could reach the point where the victim
is so inundated with fear and lack of understanding the ‘why’ of the situation that they even try to or commit suicide. Many
victims do not or cannot defend themselves and they go into fits of crying, blaming themselves for their situation and often
they retreat into bouts of depression. Sometimes there is a victim who would retaliate: striking back with violence to even
the score or get revenge. Almost a tit for tat situation, causing this victim to become an even bigger victim as the rest of
the friends withdraw from befriending him as they are scared of his outbursts. Some victims learn to walk away.
19. Passive Retaliating Strategies
Even though it would feel good to get back at a bully – get revenge! – That is not the answer. Some good reasons why
you shouldn’t retaliate against bullies are:
- You want to bring an end to the actions
- You could get seriously injured
Strategies which are better to use are:
- Know your own value and then focus your emotions and your energies and stay calm
- Write down what you feel or keep a journal
- Keep a positive feeling about yourself and say good things about yourself (and believe it)
- Say nothing or ignore the bully
- Don’t hesitate to look a bully in the eye and tell him to stop in a clear and loud voice
- Seek help from friends or adults
- Just walk (run) away
- Help the bully decide what he wants – ask if he would rather be a friend than an enemy
- Let him know that there are always other options
- Get your friends in a group and talk things out with the bully
- Learn not to get hurt
- In the case of the younger child the teacher could perhaps draw up a picture poster to guide the children to
more appropriate behaviour patterns.
- According to: (Gordon and Browne 2008:481) “A ‘Talk it out’ poster helps teachers mediate conflicts and teach
children resolution skills.” The poster should relate to 1. Stop. Cool off. 2. Talk and listen. 3. Think of ways to
solve the problem. 4. Choose the idea you both like.
20. Incidents which Often Occur as a Result of Bullying
-
The victim drops out of school
The victim changes jobs
The victim becomes depressed
The victim retaliates aggressively
The victim commits suicide
The victim retaliates by committing a murder
Very few cases the victim stays strong enough to be able to move forward and start anew without allowing the
imprint of the ‘Bully’ to affect their lives as they realise that the bully doesn’t actually form part of their lives, but
is only an invasion like a leach holding on.
21. Conclusion
Bullies aren’t born but they are bred from the discomfort of their own homes or their own lives. Often they do not see
themselves as bullies but as ‘cool’ kids or ‘cool’ adults. They find no wrong in the way they treat others. Often bullies treat
others the way they were treated as they were growing up. They develop based on the type of rules their parents
imparted on them as they grew up. In some cases the parents have been victims of bullying themselves and have never
learned to deal with the issue properly, as a result they are never able to teach their own kids the lessons necessary to
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keep them from bullying others.
In delving into the personality of the bully, we may find that they are not necessarily bad people. They may be
presenting a pretty good view from the outside but hurting from the inside. They may be good, loyal sports mates; good
friends’ supportive to parents and siblings; or even perform helpful duties towards others. The problem is though that
even though they may be potentially good people, they are harming and hurting others. They are intruding on someone
else’s right to grow up without being abused. They are invading someone else’s right to enjoy their work or career and
they are even invading on their space to enlighten or teach someone else. Even if the bully is struggling with their own
emotions they cannot bumptiously invade someone else’s space. It is this arrogant behaviour of theirs that allow them to
be labelled as bullies.
Regarding the school or work situation: “The end to bullying starts with a question: does senior management see
the cost? Do they understand that tolerating and excusing bullying behaviour is precisely what permits it to flourish?”
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Leman, Dr K. 2008. Have a new kid by Friday. Revell. Baker Publishing Group. United States of America.
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