Des Moines Business Record
09-15-07
The life of a subprime college football fan
BY JIM POLLOCK Being an Iowa State University football fan is like being a
subprime mortgage lender. You agree on the terms, make a financial
commitment and hope for a decent return, all the while fearing a total disaster.
Of course, there are some differences. If you're a mortgage lender, you get to
choose your clients. When you pick a college, the football team comes with it like
a dormitory mattress.
A mortgage lender can go crying to the government, begging for a bailout or an
interest rate cut. A football fan can yell helpful advice, but the coach always
seems kind of preoccupied. And he makes sure to wear headphones. (I suspect
some of the coaches we've had were listening to light jazz by the fourth quarter.)
As I write this, I'm only guessing how the ISU-Iowa game turns out. With any
luck, I'm wrong. But I have an uneasy feeling that the Cyclones' season is going
to be about as much fun as working for Countrywide Financial Corp.
When I loaned my loyalty to Iowa State, it was a simpler time. I don't remember
hating the Hawkeyes very much, and there were so few bowl games, nobody
expected to actually go to one.
The football team played in a quaint little stadium right outside my dorm window,
no more remote or exalted than the Friley Hall cafeteria.
Since then, the school and its supporters have spent untold millions to build a
stadium, a towering press box, a high-tech scoreboard and an indoor practice
facility, just to name the highlights.
It must have been enough money to cure some minor disease or start a fund that
could have educated thousands of deserving Iowans. But it wasn't enough to
beat Oklahoma.
Sometimes a risky investment does pay off. Sometimes a third-string quarterback
leads Iowa State to victory over Nebraska. OK, once.
But for the most part, the returns have been modest. We've had one string of
success against Iowa and a few so-so bowl games.
I drove to Memphis with three other guys for the 1972 Liberty Bowl. Great game.
But we lost.
Turning around a football program is like moving a piano into a studio apartment,
but it can be done. Hayden Fry did it for the Hawkeyes. Somehow Louisville
changed from basketball school to football power. And now Rutgers is a Top 25
team? And Hawaii? This is why some people never give up.
It was announced at ISU's game against the University of Northern Iowa that
another $19 million will be spent on the stadium. Craig Petermeier, president and
CEO of the Jacobson Cos., and his wife, Virginia, donated $500,000 to the
cause.
"Some people asked me after that game if I wanted my money back," Petermeier
said.
You have to admire the tenacity of people who stay true to their alma mater like
that. Me, I'm more of a quitter. Every 30 years or so, I stop and think, "Wait a
minute. I don't even know these players. What do I care?"
Still, I'll be happy to see the faithful get their reward some day.
And on that glorious day, maybe they'll decide it's time to put in more parking.
We went to the ISU-UNI game and drove all over the neighborhood west of the
stadium hunting for a parking place. I never had trouble finding one before, but it
was a big crowd and those party tents in the Hilton Coliseum parking lot have
displaced a few acres of vehicles while raking in a little more cash.
We ended up far, far away, right where an East Coast sportswriter would have
predicted - next to a cornfield. I think we were still in Ames, but some of the
people seemed to have Slater accents.
After ISU lost, we skulked off into the night, hoping to rediscover the car.
We trudged for blocks and blocks as the crowd gradually dispersed. We cut
across a huge expanse of soccer fields. No lights. Nobody to show us the way.
We plunged ahead, not knowing if we were going to trip over something or fall
into a hole, not quite sure of the best route to take and wondering how long it
would take to reach our destination.
Hey, I'm an Iowa State graduate. I know a metaphor when I see one.