What does the Bible Say: If you love to listen to you will gain knowledge, and if you pay attention you will become wise. What does the Catechism say CCC: Chastity is the joyous affirmation of someone who knows how to live self-giving, free from any form of self- centered slavery. This presupposes that the person has learnt how to accept other people, to relate to them, while respecting their dignity in diversity. The chaste person is not self-centered, not involved in selfish relationship with other people. Chastity makes the personality harmonious. It matures it and fills it with inner peace. This purity of mind and body helps develop true self-respect and at the same time makes one capable of respecting others, because it makes one see in them persons to reverence, insofar as they were created in the image of God and through grace are children of God, recreated by Christ who “called you out of the darkness into his marvelous light” (1 Peter 2:9) Rabbinic teaching for at least 2500 years has consistently opposed premarital sex. Judaism removes sexual intercourse from any context of selfishness or primitive lust, and enshrines it as a sanctified element in the most intimate and most meaningful relationship between two human beings. Within the sacred marriage bond, sexual relations are not only permissible, they are in fact the fulfillment of divine commandment. Rabbi Issac Frank The promise of two people to belong always to each other makes it possible for lovemaking to mean total giving and total receiving. It is the totality of married life that makes sexual intercourse meaningful. This is why the church refers to sexual intercourse as the “marital act” Father Richard C. MacDonald Islam views sexual love as a gift from God. It is a sign of God’s love and mercy and if given to human beings for their good and well-being. Islam limits sexual activity to men and women within the bond of marriage. It is permitted only to those couple who joined themselves in a lawful marriage. Muzammil H. Siddi, Islam teacher Chastity is sexual self- control, it is an attitude of respect, a positive lifestyle. It applies to everyone, unmarried and married. Unmarried- staying pure in thought and deed, refraining from sexual intercourse and deliberate genital arousal. Married- staying true to your marriage partner and only engaging in sexual intercourse within the marriage- (fidelity) Celibacy- special form of chastity, it excludes all forms of genital sexual intimacy Chastity is a spiritual state not just a physical state. Although a person can’t regain his or her physical virginity, anyone at any time can regain chastity. It is emotional virginity. Note**** Chastity is not something like a jacket that you can put on or take off whenever you like. It is a part of yourself that communicates to others in your daily words and actions. Modesty is one way to express chastity. What are the advantages of living a chaste lifestyle? The advantages of living a chaste lifestyle are freedom from a negative lifestyle and freedom to live a positive lifestyle. Guilt, worry, doubt, regret Wondering “How far will I go on this date with this person” Being used by others and using other people STI’s The possibility of not being able to bear a child because of an STI Pregnancy Deciding to raise a child you are not ready for or giving it up for adoption. Trauma of abortion Loss of Reputation Pressure to marry early or the wrong person The ghosts of past sexual relationships invading your marriage Exercise control over your life Develop real friendships based on mutual respect, shared thoughts, and feelings. Have many relationships Develop self-respect and self- control Finish your education and achieve financial stability before having to marry. Find a potential mate who values you for the person that you are Enjoy greater trust in marriage. A young woman in her 20’s….. My high school and college years were the best years of my life. I learned that “no” to sex meant “yes” to fun. My reputation as a virgin got out fast. I had more dates, better dates, and good quality relationships. Guys knew they didn’t need have to perform (sexually) for me, so we concentrate on getting to know each other and having a great time. -Sex, Love and You by Thomas Likona Chastity is not something like a jacket that you can put on or take off whenever you like. It is a part of you that communicates to others in your daily words and actions. Modesty is one important way to express chastity Girls remember- Ladies, you must be careful using those parts of your body to draw men to you. Men are naturally drawn to those areas and don’t need any of your help. Be Modest in your dress. You communicate a lot in the way your present yourself. Recent College Graduate… I never learned how to treat a girl until I dated a girl a college who dressed modestly. She was interesting. She commanded respect. What does the Bible say? Dt.30:15 “See, I have set before you today life and prosperity, death and adversity.” What does the Catechism of the Catholic Church? CCC#2290- “The virtue of temperance disposes us to avoid every kind of excess: The abuses of food, alcohol, tobacco, or medicine. Those incur grave guilt who, by drunkenness or a love of speed, endanger their own and others’ safety on the road, at sea, or in the air.” CCC# “The education of the conscience is a lifelong task. From the earliest years, it awakens the child to the knowledge and practice of the inferior law recognize by conscience. Prudent education teaches virtue; it prevents or cures fears, selfishness and pride, resentment arising from guilt, and feelings of complacency, born of human weakness and faults. The education of the conscience guarantees freedom and engenders peace of heart.” Dating Strategies- Ways to Say No….. “You say ‘No’ before you ever go on a date. ‘No is a state of mind’; it is a definite decision. Strategies for Dating Begin with Group Dating Delay and minimize single dating ^ 91% of girls who began dating at age 12 lost their virginity by the time they graduated high school ^ 20% of girls who dated at age 16 lost theirs by the time they graduated high school Involve your parents Get the perspective and wisdom of someone who care about you and your future. Bring home the person to meet your parents Avoid temptations Avoid places that will tempt you- basements- being alone Avoid sexual stimuli- movies with sexual content, pornography Don’t drink or use drugs This lowers your sexual inhibitions, will make you more likely to give in to sexual temptations Remember there are people are waiting for you to drink more alcohol than you can handle Set strict limits on your expression of physical affectionwhen you set limits, you won’t find yourself fighting the temptation to go “a little big farther” the next time Go Slow Don’t let intense emotions build up too fast. When you ask someone, “How do you feel about me” that will artificially accelerate things Be careful when talking about “our relationship” “our future” Let the relationship fold naturally Tim: Don’t get involved with someone who is sexually experienced. That happened to me in school. She said sex, didn’t have to be part of our relationship, but it created as subtle pressure. I always felt as if I was disappointing her. Now I wouldn’t involve myself with someone whose convictions about how far to go are different from mine. Once you get involved in sexual activity at all, you’ll go farther than you want to go-maybe not right away, but eventually. There’s an old saying; “Sin will take you farther than you want to go, and keep you longer than you wanted to stay” So don’t even get started. Rachel: I believe that every person has a different point for selfcontrol. You have to be obedient to your opwn convictions, what you can handle. And you have to be really honest to keep from falling. You can’t fool yourself, and you have to be willing to discuss this issue with the person. – Sex, Love, and You- by Thomas and Judy Likona Practical Advice Choose friends who share your values Get the right kind of sex education Have and keep your high standards Wait for the right person Ask for God’s Help Keep your clothes on!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Remember- God places sex within marriage entirely for our own benefit. When you share your body with someone, you are giving part of yourself. If your partner walks out of your life, something of you goes with him or her. You’ll never get it back. Keeping sex within married love is your best protection against that. Within marriage, sex is a source of many blessings, outside of the marriage it is a source of many sufferings. *Sexual intimacy between a man and a woman is God’s gift to newlyweds. God’s gift is not meant to be opened early. ***Waiting for sex until marriage has never hurt anyone*** Worry about Pregnancy and STD’s Fear of getting pregnant or STDs is a source of real emotional stress for lots of young people Kids have sex and end up terrified, and never want to go through that experience again. Disappointment and Emptiness Sex is a poor substitute for intimacy Girls are more likely to see sex as a sign of “commitment” in the relationship Regret -more often than not kids regret losing their virginity - Regret over uncommitted sexual relationships can last for years Guilt -Guilt is a special form of regret- it’s your conscience telling you’ve done something morally wrong Guilt is a productive feeling when it reminds you of your values and gets you back on the right track. The best response to guilt is to accept God’s forgiveness and as for his grace to amend your life. God and religion may not be in the forefront of your mind right now but even if they’re somewhere in the background what you’ve been taught about God and sinful behavior is still part of you. Loss of Self-Respect and Self- Esteem Sex without commitment can lower the self-respect and self-esteem of both the user and the used. People aren’t things. They are not meant to be used then thrown away. People who exploit people in this way not only hurt others, they damage their own character and loss respect for themselves. Lack of Trust and Fear of Commitment –guys or girls who feel used or betrayed after a sexual relationship breaks us may experience difficulty with future relationships Depression and Suicide -kids who have had sex at younger ages have a higher risk of suicide and depression 8. Negative Effects on Sexual Intimacy in Marriage Comparison: if you have had sex with someone other than your spouse there will be a tendency to compare them to previous sexual partners What does the Bible says: Sir 6:33 “If you love to listen you will gain knowledge, and if you pay attention you will become wise” 1Cor “or you do not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, which you have from God, and that you are not on your own” Why are all the methods of preventing the conception of a child not equally good? The Church recommends the refined methods of self-observation and natural family planning (NFP) as methods of deliberately regulating conception. These are keeping with the dignity of man and woman; they respect innate laws of the female body; they demand mutual affection and consideration and therefore are a school of love. The church pays careful attention to the order of nature and sees in it a deep meaning. For her it is therefore not a matter of indifference whether a couple manipulates the woman’s fertility or instead makes use of the natural alternation of fertile and infertile days. It is not accident that- Natural Family Planning is called NATURAL= it is ecological, holistic, healthy, and exercises in partnership. On the other hand, the Church rejects all artificial means of contraception- namely chemical methods (“the Pills), mechanical methods (for example, condom, intra-uterine device or IUD), and surgical, methods (sterilization)-since these attempt to separate the sexual act from its procreative potential and block the total self-giving of husband and wife. Such methods can even endanger the woman’s health, have an abortifacient effect (=cause a very early abortion), and in the long run be detrimental to the couple love life. Explore: The Anatomy from the perspective of the Catholic Church with the Male and Female parts along with the definitions. Urethra: a tube in which urine passes from the bladder to the outside of the body. Vagina: passageway from the uterus to outside the body; passage way for menstrual flow. Cervix: the mouth or opening into the uterus Uterus: a pear shape organ in which the beginning at puberty the lining sheds months during menstruation Fallopian tubes: passageway for the egg from the ovary to the uterus; place where fertilization occurs Ovaries: oval shaped structures which contain 300,000 to 500, 000 eggs at birth; produced the female sex hormones: estrogen and progesterone; release the egg Ovum or egg: size of pin head; if not fertilized. Dissolves and is absorbed; usually one is released monthly; if more than one egg is released, may result in the twins or multiple births Menstruation: Function: periodic shedding of the lining of the uterus that has formed for a fertilized egg Age of Onset: varies from 9-17 ends 45-55 Length Duration: varies 2-7 days Reproductive process: Ovulation: during ovulation an ovary releases a mature egg which then becomes available for fertilization: occurs approximately 4 days before the menstrual period begins but is frequently irregular in younger girls. Fertilization: the union of an egg with a perm in the fallopian tube; sperm are capable of fertilization up to 7 days after intercourse Fertility- the physical ability or power to give life, to procreate. A female fertility cycle is theme between the beginning of one period of menstruation and the beginning of the next period of menstruation. Most cycle last from three to five weeks and includes a short period of fertility and a longer period of infertility. Therefore, women are only fertile at certain, while men are fertile all the time. Menstruation is referred to as the beginning of the cycle. The lining of the uterus, which had developed in preparation for receiving a new life, is made up of cells and tiny blood vessels. When fertilization does not occur, this lining is integrates and flows out of the body through the vagina. This is called a women’s period. If an egg is fertilized, it results in conception and new life. Penis: the male sex organ Scrotum: the pouch located behind the penis which contains the testicles; provide protection to the testicles; control temperature necessary for sperm protection and survival. Testes: round glands which descend into the scrotum following birth; produce and store sperm starting in puberty; produce the male sex hormone, testosterone Vas Deferens: passageway for sperm leading from the testicle and joining the urethra. Seminal Vesicle: a sac-like structure lying behind the bladder; secretes a thick fluid that forms –part of the semen Prostate Gland: a gland located in the male pelvis secretes a thick, milky fluid that forms part of the semen. Cowper’s Gland: two glands that secrete a fluid that is released from the penis soon after erection; may contain sperm. Urethra: the tube which urine passed from the bladder to the outside of the body; closed to urine during ejaculation. Sperm: the make sex cells; too small to be seen without a microscope; shaped like tadpoles; movement aided by lashing their tails; production begin usually between age 12-14; total umber per ejaculation 200-500 million; may survive in the fallopian tubes for 7 days, but rarely cause fertilization after 72 hours. Ejaculation: the release of semen from the penis Semen: the sperm- containing fluid that passes out of the penis at the time of ejaculation; produced and stored in the seminal vesicles and prostate gland. Male Fertility -Male fertility doesn’t occur in cycles. Once males past puberty, their fertility is continuous. - Fertility begins in males with the production of sperm cells. The process usually starts when boys are between the ages of twelve and sixteen. - Sperm are first formed in tiny tubes inside the testicles. As sperm matures, they travel to a large tube, which is called the Vas Deferens. There are two of these larger tubes, one for each testicle. -The testicles are found outside of the make body. Why do you ask- is something so precious left outside the body where they are vulnerable to injury, The reason is that sperm production requires a temperature that is slight cooler than the rest of the body. The scrotum which is the sac of skin covering the testicle actually regulates the temperature of the testicles. . Chastity gives us freedom from worrying about pregnancy, sexually transmitted diseases, and maintaining our future relationships. Handout- Sexually Transmitted Disease Fact Sheet Article- “The Sex Degrees of Separation” Handout- Avoiding Pregnancy and Maintaining Good Sexual Health Outcome 9.13 A and Outcome 9.13B: The student will explore our Catholic teaching that human life must be respected and protected from the moment of our conception. The student will identify the responsibilities and sources of support associated with pregnancy and parenting. What does the Bible say? Luke 1:41”When Elizabeth heard Mary’s greeting, the child leaped in her womb. And Elizabeth was filled with the Holy Spirit.” Is. 49:1 “Listen to me, O coastlands, pay attention, you peoples from far away! The LORD called me before I was born; while I was in my mother’s womb he named me.” Why is abortion unacceptable at any phase in the development of an embryo? God-given human life is God’s own property; it is sacred from the first moment of its existence and not under the control of any human being. “Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you, and before you born I consecrated you.” God alone is Lord over life and death. Not even “my” life belongs to me. Every child, from the moment of conception on, has a right to life. From his earliest beginnings an unborn human being is a separate person, and no one can infringe upon his rights, not the state, not the doctor, and not even the mother. The church’s clarify about this is not a lack of compassion, she means, rather, to point out the irreparable harm that is that is inflicted on the child who is killed in abortion and on his parents and on society as a whole. Protecting innocent human life is one of the noblest tasks of the State. If a State, evades this responsibility, it undermines the foundations of a rule of law. Sarah’s Story The Miracle at Christmas Choosing Life On Abortion Current Events about the Human Body Scripture Commentary: The following scripture passages describe to us how all of creation is charged with the grandeur of God. We stand in awe of gratitude at the complexity, diversity and beauty of our being. The fact that Jesus took on human form gives incredible dignity to all human beings. During the times in your lives when you are experiencing significant changes in your bodies, we are reminded that our lives unfold within a beautiful and infinite story. Gen 1:27-31“So God created humankind in his image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them. God blessed the,, and said to them, ‘Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth and subdue (conquer) it; and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds in the air and over every living thing that moves upon the earth” God said, ‘See, I have given you every plant yielding seed that is upon the face of and every tree with seed in its fruit; you shall have them for food. And to every beast of the earth, and to every bird of the air, and to everything that creeps on earth, everything that has the bread of life, I have given every green plant for food. And it was so. God saw everything that he had made, and indeed, it was very good. And there was evening and there was morning, the sixth day. all the earth. Mt. 7:7-11“Ask, and it will be given to you; search. And you will find; knock and the door will be opened for you. For everyone who asks receives, and everyone who searches finds, and for everyone who knocks, the door will be opened. Is there anyone among you who, if your child asks for bread, will give a stone? Or if the child asks for a fish, will give you a snake? If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good things to those who ask him! CCC # 2333 “Everyone, man and woman, should acknowledge and accept his sexual identity. Physical, moral, and spiritual difference and complementarity are oriented toward the goods of marriage and flourishing of family life. The harmony of the couple of society depends in part on the way in which the complementarity, needs, and mutual support between the sexes are lived out. CCC#1704 “The human person participates in the light and power of the divine Spirit. By his reason, he is capable of understanding the order of things established by the Creator. By freewill, he is capable of directing himself toward his true good. He finds his perfection in seeking and loving what is true and good” The Catechetical Focus: We marvel at the complexity if the human body and how God has created its part to work as a while. We accept that we are made in the image and likeness of God As Christians, we appreciate our uniqueness, demonstrate sensitivity toward diners, and understand that each person is worthy of love and respect. Catechetical Focus: We are called to respect the dignity and needs of others. We are called to make life-giving choices. 1Cor 12: 12-16 “For just as the body is one and has many members, and all the members of the body, though many, are one body, so it is with Christ. For in the one Spirit we were all baptized into one body- Jews or Greeks, slaves or free- and we were all made to drink od one Spirit. Indeed, the body does not consist of one member but of many. If the foot would say, ‘Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body,’ that would not make it any less a part of the body. And if the ear would say, ‘Because I am not an eye, I do not belong to body,’ that would not make it any less a part of the body. CCC 2270: Human life must be respected and protected absolutely from the moment of conception. From the first moment of his existence, a human being must be recognized as having the rights of the person, among which is the inviolable right of every innocent being to life. Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you. My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately wrought in the depths of the earth. Discuss (on the handout): Myths about Sexual Assault and What to Do in Case of Sexual Assault What are some ways that we can protect ourselves from sexual assault? Discussion: What are the other types of abuses? Emotional: not providing appropriate care, attention, and affection. Unsuitable demands may be placed on a person. A person may endure belittling comments. Neglect: Not providing adequate emotional and physical care. Physical: inappropriate physical force, resulting in injury. At times, injury is caused by over-discipline. Sexual: this includes exploitation, interference, invitation to touch, exposure, and assault. Brainstorm: What are the resources and support systems that other guidance to our victims of abuse?