Reviewing Self-Disclosure
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True/False: Self-Disclosure must involve
intentionality, choice, private information, and risk
Which is more personal/private? History or Story
True/False: Self-Disclosure is an objective process
How does reciprocity factor into self-disclosure?
What are some reasons individuals choose to selfdisclose?
What are some reasons individuals decide NOT to
self-disclose?
What does the Social Penetration Model/Theory say
about personal information and self-disclosure?
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
Communicating
Conflict
Chapter 9 Recap/Lecture
True or False?
 Conflict
is avoidable
 Conflict can be productive
Interpersonal Conflict
 “The
interaction of interdependent
people who perceive incompatible goals
and interference from each other in
achieving those goals” (p. 180)
Elements of Interpersonal
Conflict

Interaction
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
Interdependence
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Some relationship; need for each other
Perceptions
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Created/sustained through communication
….of incompatible goals
Also consider selective perceptions (in
interactions)
Conflict as Goal Oriented

Incompatible goals
Dark Side vs. Bright Side
Dark Side of Conflict
 Bullying
and
Aggression
Bright Side of Conflict

 Violence
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Managing conflict  part of
being a competent
communicator
Productive conflict
management  promotes
physical and mental health
Expressing feelings; learning
those of others
Relationship maintenance
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

Increasing confidence
Increasing depth
Improves decision making
skills
Types of Conflict

Image Conflicts


Content (Substantive) Conflicts

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
Issues about a relationship
Serial Conflicts

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
Addresses a question of right or wrong
Relational Conflicts


Public vs. Private
Revolves around an issue
Value Conflicts


Disagreement about self definition/image
Focuses on time frame; not subject (unlike other 4 types)
Recur over time; no resolution
Serial Conflicts  Meta-Conflicts
Overlapping?
Myths about Conflict
 All
conflict is a result of miscommunication
 Good communication resolves ALL
conflict
 Talking about conflict is always the best
strategy
 Additional:

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All conflict is negative
Conflict is avoidable
Role of Gender, Sex, and
Culture
 Gender


and Sex
Relational life vs. Public life
Collaborative vs. Competitive
 Culture


How we behave in conflict
What we have conflict about
Communication Patterns
 Symmetrical
Escalation
 Symmetrical Withdrawal
 Pursuit-Withdrawal vs. Withdrawal-Pursuit
 Symmetrical Negotiation
 Which of the patterns are positive?
Negative?
Explaining/Understanding
Conflict
The Four-Part Model
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Interdependence of Four Parts;
happen simultaneously
You and Me: Participants
Context: Emotional
background
Subject: Topic of the argument
Ignoring any part; unhealthy
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Placating (no “me”)
Pouncing (no “you”)
Computing (no “context”)
Distracting (no “subject”)
The Explanatory
Process Model
 Conflict
occurs in
episodes
 Distal Context
Background
 Proximal Context
 Conflict Interaction
 Proximal Outcomes
 Distal Outcomes
Power and Conflict



How do the two relate?
Power = ‘ability to control behavior of others’
Use of Power
 Direct application of power (e.g. spanking)
 Direct and virtual use of power (e.g. threatening to spank)
 Indirect application of power (e.g. “I’d like to see that room
clean asap”)

Hidden Power (e.g. Turning down date; mom won’t approve)
Power is relational
Most consider responses to power
Sex differences?
Empowerment

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Relational messages (e.g. “I’m your mother”)
Conflict Management
 Staying

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
calm (lightening up)
Stay in the present
Acknowledge other’s comments
Provide nonverbal and verbal feedback
Reframing
 Presume/express
goodwill; don’t expect the worst
 Ask
questions
 Listen

Consider active listening
 Practice
cultural sensitivity
Application Exercise




Create a skit about interpersonal conflict based on the type of
conflict you are assigned
Your skit should walk us through the conflict based on what
was discussed in the chapter
 Use an example of a communication pattern and/or the
use of power (as discussed in the chapter)
After each skit, groups will have to walk us through how the skit
served as a real life example of interpersonal conflict
 Using the Four Part Model or the Explanatory Model
(whichever you are assigned)
Cannot pull an example from the book; be creative!!!
Film Analysis
Project – Group
Meetings
Proposals Due – Oct. 23rd