Parenting our Children Online
(POCO)
Sarah Nicholson
Facilitators
Welcome
• Sarah Nicholson
• Parenting Our Children Online (POCO)
Facilitator
• How much do you know about internet
safety?
Aims of the Session
• Develop a greater understanding of how
children and young people use the internet
• Feel confident about discussing your child’s
online world with them
• Be more informed about what to do if you
have a worry about what your child is doing
online
Parenting dilemmas
• You find that your 10 year old son is playing games
online when he said he was doing is home work
• You 5 year old son and his cousin want to watch
Thomas the Tank on YouTube
• Your 14 year daughter tells you she has downloaded
a movie she hasn’t seen yet from an illegal file
sharing site
• Your 12 year old son has just started a new school
and tells you he wants a Facebook account
• Your daughter tells you her friend has been sharing
naked pictures of herself with her boyfriend
Parenting Spectrum
Controlling
Confident
Casual
• Controlling – stopping your child having access to
particular websites/internet completely
• Confident – feeling you have the knowledge and
confidence to discuss this and agree some rules
together
• Casual - not feeling confident about online activity so
ignoring what your child is doing, hope it will be ok
W–W-W
• WHAT do children and young people
do online?
• WHERE do they go online, what
websites do they use?
• WHO do they talk to online?
Who are your children talking
to online?
• Discuss with your child who they are friends
with online, have they met them in real life?
• Ask them what social networks they are on
• Ask what gaming sites they play on
• Ask them to show you their privacy settings
on their accounts
Where are children going
online?
• Ask your child to show you their
favourite websites
• Look at internet history – discuss setting
‘safe’ parameters of where children can
go
• Discuss with your child what they look
at online, e.g. Gaming forums, chat
rooms, video download sites etc.
What are your children doing
online?
• Ask your child what movies they watch online
or what music they download
• Think about what security settings you might
want to put on your devices e.g. Setting
safety modes
• Discuss starting a family internet Policy
• Remind them they can talk to you if they see
anything that upsets them online
Reporting Concerns online
Any illegal content should be reported
to the IWF (Internet Watch Foundation)
Any abuse online can be reported to
Click CEOP
If a child is being bullied online they can
receive help at www.cybermentors.org
Any problems online should be reported to the
website the child was on. If serious enough
concerns should also be reported to the Police.
WHAT do children use the
internet for?
• Internet Gaming
• Homework
• Social Networking
– Facebook, Instagram, Twitter
• Sharing videos, blogs, pictures
• Shopping
WHAT do children do online?
WHERE do children go online?
• Social Network Sites – Lots of sites are set up for
children of different ages, not all have moderators in
• Gaming Sites – Children can talk to different gamers
whilst playing online – these are not monitored
• Video Sharing Sites – e.g. YouTube, millions of videos
posted daily, many are not suitable for children
• Shopping Sites – Children may access inappropriate
products and services – cookies can also capture
information about your child's activity online to
target advertising towards them
WHERE do children go online?
• Chat Sites – Some sites encourage children to
talk to strangers online – allow to search for
those local to them – also can allow them to
be targeted easily
• Advice Sites - Some sites may provide
‘advice’ to children that is not appropriate
e.g. Dieting websites etc.
* Visit some sites you feel happy for your child
to use – put into internet safety agreement*
WHO do children talk to
online?
• Gamers - children can use sites such as
Minecraft to play against friends and
strangers online
• ‘Friends’ - Social networking sites allow
communication with friends or friends of
friends. Some children may have ‘friends’
they have never met in real life
• Avatars – Online characters on sites such as
Moshi monsters or Club penguin – check
moderation level
WHO do children talk to
online?
• Strangers – Some sites such as Twitter, BBM and KIK
allow children to ‘follow’ and send messages to
strangers
• Anonymous – Sites such as askfm allow users to ask
questions/talk to other anonymous strangers
randomly selected
• Video chat - Sites such as Omegle and Chat Roulette
allow webcams to be used to ‘chat’ to other strangers
How could you talk to your child about their online
friends........
What are you worried about your child doing online?
Concerning behaviour online
• Downloading/Streaming movies/images – a child
might be using illegal sites to do this without realising
• Creating and uploading videos – Posting videos of
themselves or others online e.g. through YouTube
(over 13yrs) that may pose a risk
• Sharing photos and videos – Sending sexualised
images of themselves or others can be referred to as
‘sexting’ – once it’s sent it’s “out there”
• Gambling – Children may falsely claim to be older
than they are to access online gambling sites
• In game purchases online – using credit card details
Concerning behaviour online
• Bullying or harassing others – This may be someone
they know via a social networking site or
anonymously e.g. Askfm or Omegle - this is
sometimes referred to as ‘trolling’
• Hacking - Where children ‘hack’ into others account
such as Facebook often called ‘Fraping’ (which many
feel is an offensive term)
• Dating – Children can often claim to be over 18 and
access online dating sites to talk to older people
online where they can often be groomed and incited
to send sexualised images of themselves
Where are the webcams in your house?
The next two slides are some
case examples of
inappropriate contact
online....
Think of something you do every day, at
home, that takes 20 – 25 minutes.....
..... When you are doing this activity,
where are your children?
12 year old girl on MSN messenger talking to an older boy in her
school....
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(19:47) Luceee:heyaaaaa
(19:47) Ben:lolage
(19:47) Luceee:u ok
(19:47) Ben:yh u... cn i see ur pussy thn bbe?
(19:47) Luceee:nopeee
(19:48) Ben:why?
(19:48) Luceee:becauseee
(19:48) Ben:because wat????
(19:49) Ben:tell me why?
(19:49) Luceee:errrrmmmm cz im to yound as u even said :
(19:50) Ben:haha yh but things cud change
(19:50) Luceee:haha
(19:50) Ben:they cud :/
(19:50) Luceee:haha they wunt n tht is just bribe or w.e
(19:50) Ben:no its not bbe
(19:51) Luceee:iss
(19:51) Ben:no its not bbe
(19:51) K Luceee :k then
(19:51) Ben:i mean it bbe
(19:53) Luceee:uno i like u but u said im too young sooo (
19:53) Ben:yh but feelins change
(19:54) Luceee:k
(19:54) Ben::L
(19:59) Luceee:okay then
(20:00) Ben:booobies!!!
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Adam to Laura Hi x
Adam to Laura Pic of Adam
Laura to Adam What is that
Laura to Adam Is that ur willy
Adam to Laura Yeah. U like?
Laura to Kik Admin Help me now and someone sent me a picture of there willy and I'm 8 years old
Kik Messenger Kik Admin to Laura Unfortunately, I'm a bot and not smart enough to help you. If you have a
question, visit help.kik.com
Laura to Adam I'm 8 years old dont send me rude photos
Adam to Laura How old r u?
Adam to Laura Pic of Adam
Laura to Adam 8
Adam to Laura Ok. You like my picture?
Laura to Adam No is it your willy
Adam to Laura Yes. Can I see you vagina?
Laura to Adam No
Adam to Laura Why?
Adam to Laura So? Please?
Laura to Adam Because I'm 8
Adam to Laura Ill send you more pictures.
Laura to Adam Ok wait there
Laura to Adam Pic of laura
Adam to Laura I can't see it properly.Do you have an iPhone?
Laura to Adam Ok hang on
Laura to Adam No I don't
Adam to Laura iPod?
Laura to Adam Yes
Adam to Laura Can you FaceTime?
Adam to Laura You wanna FaceTime instead and show me?
Adam then talks the child through the process of using her ipod on line and showing him self generated images of
herself!
An adult male sexually
grooms an 8 year old
girl he has just met
online....
Different safety measures
• Talking to your child about your concerns
• Agree sites you are happy for them to use
• Set up different security modes online e.g.
YouTube Safety mode and Google SafeSearch
to help filter content you don’t want your
child to see
• Turning off in-app purchasing on
smartphones/tablets
• Check privacy settings on accounts such as
Facebook etc.
Different Safety measures
• Ensure webcams are in a shared space
• Talk to your child about how they use the internet on
their phones/tablets/at school etc.
• Encourage children to recognise if they feel
uncomfortable about something to tell you or
another trusted adult
• If you have a concern about what your child is doing
online, decide whether you need to involve your
child’s school or even the Police
• Consider a FAMILY INTERNET CONTRACT that says
what children can do at what age, rules and
boundaries
Remember
• Millions of children access the internet everyday and
most do so in a safe secure way that enriches their
learning and social experience...
• However, there are risks out there and as parents we
need to have the knowledge and confidence to help
our children manage those risks to keep themselves
safe..... Netaware
• We all make mistakes. Chat about how you would
address something if it went wrong, you are setting a
safe way for them to connect to you.
• O2 will look at any device – parental settings
Any Questions???
Thank you
• Sarah Nicholson
• POCO Facilitator
• Any concerns about anything we have
discussed today please contact NSPCC
on 0808 800 5000