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Reflection Paper Learning Plan 7
Family Systems 550-150
Jennifer Dohl
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Family systems theory suggests that we can only understand an individual if we see
the individual in relation to the other members of their family system. Each individual
family member influences and is influenced by the other members (Becvar & Becvar,
1999).
Learning to use family systems theory to look at my own family of origin has helped
me to see who I am from a new perspective. I am able to look back at how I was raised
and can see the similarities and differences of how I raised my children. I can see the
way my family of origin interacted and how the boundaries and rules my family had in
place has influenced the way I interact with family and others. Constructing the family
genogram was very helpful for me to analyze where I came from. My family genogram
can’t tell me everything but it does shed light on some patterns of behaviors and
relationships in my family. Realizing that no individual becomes who they are without
the influence of their family system. Learning about my family by constructing a
genogram has helped me to be less judgmental of not only my family but of myself. It
has also taught me that change is not easy. Using the genogram can show generations
of the same pattern of behavior being taught and passed down from parent to child and
that behavior cannot be stopped or fixed easily. It will take patience, persistence and
consistency to alter a behavior pattern.
I believe the strengths of family systems theory outweigh the limitations. An important
strength of this theory is that it the counselor is able to get a better understanding of the
problem and how it can be treated most effectively when he is able to look at the whole
family system. The counselor is able to decipher how the family
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system is influencing the behavior of the identified patient (IP) and vice versa. With
the aid of the genogram the counselor can still obtain an understanding of the dynamics
and patterns of behavior in the family system even when only the identified patient in
present in the sessions. A limitation of family systems theory is that without the family
members being available for counseling the counselor may not always get the whole or
accurate picture of the family system. Family systems theory may tend to downplay the
beneficial aspects of family togetherness. In some cultures families remain fused their
entire lives and trying to have them develop a higher level of differentiation would not be
practical or helpful.
I feel that when dealing with substance use disorders as an AODA counselor, it is
impotant to gain knowledge about the identified patient’s family system. The IP as well
as their family will learn to identify family behavioral patterns, boundaries, roles and
rules and can begin to understand and adjust behaviors and feelings. I feel it is also
necessary for the IP to receive individual counseling which may include inpatient
therapy to deal with issues specific to the substance use. I feel family systems theory
will help not only the IP but also the family begin to heal.
I think what I learned about myself as a person from applying family systems theory to
my family of origin is that learned that I achieved a higher level of differentiation from my
family as I started my own family. My parents live 1,200 miles away from me but we still
talk weekly. My parents and I are still close but our relationship is more of a friendship
now that I am older. My family of origin went from having a close relationship with open
communication to almost detached when I was a teenager and them we
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became close again. I learned to recognize triangular relationships in my family of
origin and among my own children. As a professional I have learned that I must look
deeper than just the individual I will be counseling. I think involving the family whenever
possible will be beneficial to in AODA counseling. The changes I will make as a result of
family systems theory include looking at the bigger picture and l will try to learn about
where an individual came from to be better able to understand them.
When working with AODA clients I will be able to apply family systems theory by
using the strategies, techniques and skills I have learned while studying this theory. I
think it will be very beneficial to involve the family in counseling when possible. The
family and the IP can explore their familial behavioral patterns, boundaries, rules, each
members role in the family, the triangular patterns that exist, and circular causality (I act
like a child because you treat me like a child). I think that creating a genogram depicting
three generations of the family can show the family the patterns of behavior that have
been passed down from one generation to the next. Opening communication between
family members may be difficult in families with a closed system of communication
between its members and those outside the family system. Families may be very
resistant to change and want to maintain homeostasis instead of moving towards
morphostasis and morphogenesis to keep stability but also welcome change in the
family system.
This system has changed my thinking because I can now look at where I came from
and how the behaviors of generations before me have trickled down to shape who I am.
The genogram helped me to look at my family as part of a larger whole system. I have
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looked back at the triangular relationships between family members and roles we
each played in our family. My family system was able to change and adjust to changes
in our family. We were not rigid in the roles or rules or even boundaries in our family and
my family is still changing as my parents are getting older and my sister and I have
become adults with our own families.
I have shared my reflections of what I have learned about family systems theory with
my family of origin as well as my husband and children as I was learning about family
systems theory. It has sparked interesting conversations with my parents and sister. My
sister saw our child differently in some ways than I did. I will continue these
conversations with my family to make my learning more powerful.
The unfinished business I would like to work through will be with my children. My
children lived through my ex-husband and me getting divorced. I would like to hear their
reflections of that time in their lives. I think they could learn about themselves and each
other from their own family genogram and by looking at our boundaries, roles, and
rules. This won’t happen all at once but I would like to start the conversation with my
kids and see where it goes from there.