SELF “PEER” EDITING YOU WILL USE THE FOLLOWING SLIDES AND MODEL TEXTS TO GUIDE YOU IN EDITING SPECIFIC ASPECTS OF YOUR WRITTEN ASSIGNMENT. INTRODUCTION: (DISCLAIMER, IF YOU HAVE A SMOOTH FLOWING INTRO THAT DOES NOT EXACTLY FOLLOW THIS FORMAT, STICK WITH YOURS.) You want to be sure you have included the following aspects: Work title (italicized of course!) Author’s name Some key plot info as it relates to the idea of your topic Killer thesis statement The introduction should be built like an inverted triangle to work from general ideas to the clear specificity of your thesis statement. General statement(s) about topic concept Connecting plot info Thesis SAMPLE INTRO: READ THIS SAMPLE AND USE IT TO REFLECT UPON AND IMPROVE YOUR INTO IF NEEDED. “In Shakespeare’s Macbeth, the tragedy follows the title character’s ascension to the Scottish throne through his ultimate demise. His intense ambition, along with the prophecies of the three witches, guides his actions throughout the plot. As he begins to implement many of his thoughts into action, Macbeth exemplifies changes in character until he is very unlike his original self. Shakespeare employs equivocation and a transition of tone in Macbeth in order to demonstrate the witches’ profound impact on Macbeth’s character.” BODY PARAGRAPHS There will typically be between 4-6 body paragraphs. The length and number will depend on your own topic and personal writing style. There are aspects that should be universal to all body paragraphs though. Universal elements of the strong body paragraph: Clear, argumentative claim. This should be the FIRST SENTENCE of the body paragraph. You might have a more complex claim that develops over two body paragraphs. This is ok, just make sure that the second body paragraph has a nice transitional sentence that alerts the reader to the fact that the paragraph is still working on that claim. Integrated quotes (typically at least 3 per paragraph) that are grammatically correct! Analysis that states the device or technique that extends for 2+ sentences. Really dig into the quote and your ideas about the quote. Don’t make is seem like you are rushing to another point too quickly. A concluding idea that proves how the quote work together as a whole to prove your claim. Never end on just analysis of your last quote of the paragraph. SAMPLE BODY PARAGRAPH THERE ARE ONLY TWO QUOTES USED, BUT THE FIRST IS BROKEN DOWN AND SEVERAL ASPECTS ARE EXAMINED. Innocent Santiago Nasar is victim of two conflicting definitions of honor and a desperate woman’s attempt to protect her lover. Angela Vicario was well aware that Santiago was not the man who stole her virginity, and when her brothers, in an attempt to uphold both their own and their sister’s honor, asked her who it was, she “Only took the time necessary to say the name. She looked for it in the shadows, she found it at first sight among the many, many easily confused names from this world and the other, and she nailed it to the wall with her well-aimed dart, like a butterfly with no will whose sentence has always been written. ‘Santiago Nasar’” (47). The tone of urgency in the initial phrase “only took the time necessary to say the name” shows the guilt she feels at blaming an innocent man. The diction ‘shadows’ evinces Santiago’s innocence because were he guilty, the name would not have been found hiding in the obscure darkness. The diction ‘easily confused’ also evidences his innocence because it adds a tone of uncertainty to Angela’s accusation. The butterfly is symbolic of Santiago Nasar’s innocence, because butterflies are delicate, innocent, and harmless. The imagery of nailing the butterfly to the wall is metaphorical of Jesus’ crucifixion and affirms Santiago’s status as an innocent victim. The Vicario brothers killed Santiago, who paid the price for “The brothers Vicario [proving] their status as men, and the seduced sister [possessing] her honor once more” (84). The diction in this statement illustrates the point of intersection of these two conflicting definitions of honor. The significance of honor in their society is evident through the tone of the statement. Angela’s need to defend herself for her loss of honor, and her brothers need to uphold their honor and the honor of their sister, resulted in the tragic murder of the young and innocent Santiago Nasar. CONCLUSION THESE ARE THINGS NOT TO DO I ALWAYS SAY THAT THIS PARAGRAPH IS NOT ALL THAT IMPORTANT. IT JUST NEEDS TO EXIST AND NOT BREAK ANY MAJOR RULES. Beginning with an unnecessary, overused phrase such as “in conclusion,” “in summary,” or “in closing.” Although these phrases can work in speeches, they come across as wooden and trite in writing. Stating the thesis for the very first time in the conclusion. Introducing a new idea or subtopic in your conclusion. Ending with a rephrased thesis statement without any substantive changes. Making sentimental, emotional appeals that are out of character with the rest of an analytical paper. Including evidence (quotations, statistics, etc.) that should be in the body of the paper. SAMPLE CONCLUSION Both male and female honor play a vital role in the lives of the characters in Marquez’s novel Chronicle of a Death Foretold. Honor is the most highly esteemed value in the society depicted in the novel, and it is achieved through maintaining virginity for females, and protecting women and their honor for males. Pablo and Pedro’s need to achieve honor, and Angela’s need to defend her honor, resulted in the murder of the innocent victim Santiago Nasar.