The Cultural Differences in Stages of Life
Name: Arina Kartika Putri
Class: Aging and Wisdom (WF 1:00-3:00)
Subject: Stages of Life
Professor: Teddy Chocos
Date Due: 27th February 2013
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It is certain that as we live our lives we will go through stages of life. During
our life each of us will hit adulthood, maturity, and eventually death. Though, when
we will transition from one step to the other is unknown. Since our birth, each passing
day has impacted our lives in various ways, which eventually lead to the stages of life
we go through. How and where we are raised influences how and when we grow and
mature. When talking about stages of life, everyone grows differently. Though it all
starts from being born then developing into a toddler, into a child, into adolescence
then adulthood; these steps seem to be clear for most. However, it could be
accomplished in different ages. Some hit adulthood much later or sooner than others.
There are different ways one could be said to pass through these stages; biologically,
physically and mentally.
In Gail Sheehy’s article, “New passages”, she examines how stages of life
have evolved across decades. She has mentioned some of the age norms that have
shifted such as: nine-year-olds developing breasts and pubic hair; nine year old boys
carrying guns to school; thirty year old men still living at home and much more.
Sheehy explains the impact time has on stages of life, how the age norms are no
longer the same. She explains the three stages of adulthood we go through:
Provisional adulthood (18-30 years), first adulthood (30-45 years) and second
adulthood (45-85 years). Sheehy has also explained the ages, development and state
of mind they would go through in the years of the “flourishing forties”, the “flaming
fifties”, the “serene sixties” and the “sage seventies”. Sheehy has started from the
forties because she believes this is when adulthood really commences and it is also
when we start to really think about our lives.
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Development psychologist and psychoanalyst Erik Erikson has generated a
table on the development that occurs throughout an individual’s lifespan called the
psychosocial stages. An example of what this chart shows would be dealing with
initiative vs. guilt at the age of 3-5 years (the preschool stage). An important event in
a preschool-life would be starting school. This shows that a child at the age of 3 -5
must overcome their development of initiative versus guilt. Parents must support them
to initiate rather than letting their child feel guilty. The outcome if supported would be
that the child would begin to assert control and power over the environment and feel
that they have a sense of purpose. If failed they would result in a sense of guilt.
Indonesia is a country where the stage of life differs as to what Sheehy and
Erikson have mentioned, though in the country itself it is considered normal. It could
be called an exception. Indonesia is a country located above Australia, the population
stands at over two hundred million and is very much still a developing country.
Presently in Indonesia there are many that are still living with their parents at the age
of 30 and above. As stated above by Sheehy she considers this as age norm shift.
Though these ‘adults’ would have jobs, a family and they live a stable life; their
families would also join to live in their mother’s house. In a western view this would
seem odd, as these people should be sustainable enough to live on their own without
help from their parents. In Indonesia it is not about being independent or sustainable it
is about the respect they must return after their love and support. Usually only one of
their children would join to live in the mother’s house. This would typically be the
youngest child or the least sustainable child. The point of living with their parents is
to help them in many different ways. Such as helping them around the house with
simple chores and also in financial terms as retirement money is not always enough. It
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would also be company to have and to create bonds with their grandchildren. They
grow older and their spouses might have passed away so family is all they would need
and desire.
When comparing middle class families in a western country such as America
and in Indonesia, Indonesia would be seen as different because Indonesians children
and adolescence are not generally expected to do ‘chores’ or ‘work’. Americans have
believed that chores are compulsory at home as the children should help out the
family. Working to earn money for their own expenses is another example of
difference between these two countries as this is mainly to learn to be independent. In
Indonesia, as it is still a developing country, children would not be expected to work
due to the fact that companies would not accept them. There are more people outside
that are older and done with high school that would need the work more than these
kids. Chores are not usually done, as maids are common to have around the house to
clean up after them. College life in Indonesia is always paid for (assuming the parents
have the money), including studying abroad to live, food and shelter. They are to
learn to be independent and earn their own money after getting their degrees and even
then running back to their parents would be accepted behaviour. Whereas in America
some kids would have to earn the money or acquire a student loan to attend college.
Indonesia’s stages of life have evolved, thus supporting Sheehy’s theory on
how the stages of life have changed over the past decades. As indicated before the
way stages of life evolve in Indonesia is unusual if looked at in a western perspective.
In the early nineteen hundreds in Indonesia, families were starting when women or,
girls were only thirteen years of age. As soon as they are physically mature they are
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already expected to be able to provide for their husband, who are usually chosen for
them, and care for their children. Having children at such a young age has led them to
have more than 5 children. There was once a case that a baby boy could be breast fed
by both his mother and his grandmother as they were both lactating at the same time
because his grandmother was having another baby due to the early start of having
children. In a western view this would seem preposterous. Returning to Erikson’s list,
he has stated a thirteen year old is merely an adolescent who is going through identity
versus inferiority. They are in a stage where they need to develop a sense of self and
personal identity. Whereas in Indonesia in the early nineteen hundreds they are
already creating families.
In the present time Indonesia, women are also expected to have children at a
young age of about seventeen years old. It has developed since the nineteen hundreds
but women are still having children at a relatively young age. This would be common
for under privileged people that come from the rural areas of Indonesia. They would
start looking for their ‘mates’ at the age of seventeen to create a family already. Since
they are from rural locations, economically they are not financially stable they would
be working as maids or in factories. As soon as they create a family these women are
not expected to work anymore, only to care of their child. These families strongly
believe that their husbands are the man of the house and the women are to simply
obey the man’s demands. This shows the exception of rural people, the environment
that they were brought up in impacts greatly on the stages of life they will go through.
It might not be as severe as it was in the early nineteenth century but in this day
having a child at seventeen is still considered young as the body has just not fully
matured yet.
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The examples shown above were for the people who are in the ages to go
through a certain stage of life but they already have or are still in a past stage. The
difference should not create stereotypes, as they can be described as cultural
differences. The stage of life differs when we look at the background and culture of
each individual and these create exceptions in the various stages. Education,
economic status and race are prominent in creating differences in each individual’s
progression from one stage and onto the next. The exceptions to these stages of life
could be from the social norms, expectations from each culture. The differences
between of various cultural backgrounds can greatly affect the growing of the stages
of life and how each stage affects the individuals. Diversity in the 21st century can be
credited to the differences in each person’s backgrounds, which solely affect their
progression through life and its stages. There are obvious dissimilarities in the ways
that individuals develop in their home countries so thus differences in life progression
should not be seen negatively.
This is an important aspect as cultural difference shows how people of
different ethnicities and countries of the world go through their stages of life. Not
conforming to the “normal” way of progression through the stages of life would be
seen as weird and unusual to the people of one’s culture. The example of Indonesia’s
stages of life is only one country. Every country has a different way to grow and
mature through life and this is because of cultural differences. This makes considering
cultural differences an absolute must when evaluating how each person progresses
through their lives. Thus by saying this, each and every country has their own set of
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exceptions in life and these should be considered for when examining stages of life
around the world.
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References:
"Erikson's Psychosocial Stages Summary Chart." Erikson's Psychosocial Stages
Summary Chart. N.p., n.d. Web. 28 Feb. 2013.
Sheehy, Gail. New Passages. Random House: n.p., 1995. Print.
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