BUSINESS
MESSAGES
EFFECTIVE
BUSINESS MESSAGES
Purposeful
Audience-Centered
Concise
REMEMBER TO HAVE
 The
right attitude
 The
right plan
PLAN FOR ROUTINE/POSITIVE/ GOOD
NEWS MESSAGES

Opening Paragraph: Tell the good news

Middle Paragraph: Give the details

Closing Paragraph: Your “Call for action”
OPENERS FOR ROUTINE MESSAGES

Weak:


Improved:


Please send me your free video describing your Webbuilding software.
Weak:


While reading WIRED magazine, I noticed an offer of a free
video describing your web-building software.
I am conducting a training class for students of photography
at the Lincoln Training center, I saw a picture we would like
to use in our program.
Improved:

What is the procedure for ordering a copy of a photograph to
be used for training purposes?
CLOSINGS FOR ROUTINE MESSAGES

Weak:


Improved:


We would appreciate receiving answers to these questions
before April 4 so that we will have plenty of time to plan our
conferences.
Weak:


Thanks for any information you provide.
Hoping to hear from you at your earliest convenience.
Improved:

Please send the video by August 15.
PLAN FOR
BAD NEWS MESSAGES
TWO APPROACHES
Direct
Approach
Indirect
Approach
• Bad news decision (with or
without buffer)
• Explanation/ Reasons
• Appropriate, courteous
ending
• Buffer
• Explanation/ Reasons
• Bad news decision
• Appropriate, courteous
ending
BUFFER
 buffers
 avoid
should be neutral in tone
misleading the reader into
thinking the news is good.
• We both know how hard it is to make profit in this industry
Agreement
• Your check for $127.17 arrived yesterday. Thank you.
Appreciation
Cooperation
Fairness
• Employee Services is here to assist all associates with
their health insurance, retirement planning, and
continuing education needs.
• For the past week we have carefully monitored those using the
photocopying machine to see whether we can detect any
pattern of use that might explain its frequent breakdowns
Good News
Praise
Understanding
•A replacement knob for your range is on its way,
shipped February 10 via UPS.
•The Stratford Group clearly has an impressive
record of accomplishment in helping clients
resolve financial reporting problems.
•So that you can more easily find the printer with
the features you need, we are enclosing a
brochure that describes all the Panasonic printers
currently available.
EXPLANATION AND ANALYSIS

Explanations, are often crucial to the
effectiveness of a negative message.
a. Try to convince the reader that you are
acting in their interest.
b. Explain courteously all relevant facts
behind the decision.
c. Show that the request has been
carefully considered.
DECISION, IMPLIED, OR EXRESSED
WITH RESALE AND/OR HELPFUL
SUGGESTIONS.
 If
the reasons are so clear that the reader
will conclude you must refuse the request
then don’t state the bad news.
 If
an implied decision might be
misunderstood, express your decision
clearly near the end of the explanation.
THE WORD “YOU” REALLY EFFECTS YOUR TONE

Congratulate & thank with “you”
 “Your

company always provides the best service”
Do not use “you” when giving bad or negative
information
 “Your
Shoddy work produced a bad toaster.”
Vs.
 “My
toaster no longer works”
NOT GOOD.
You must have
dropped the
engine. The
housing is
badly cracked.
BETTER
The badly cracked housing suggests that your
engine must have fallen onto a hard surface
from some height.
THE RIGHT ATTITUDE
Be Polite
 Instead of this:
You’ve been sitting on our order for two weeks. We
need it now!

Use this:
We are eager to receive our order. When can we
expect delivery?
THE RIGHT ATTITUDE

Be courteous and shield the reader’s pride
Instead of : If you had studied the instructions carefully,
you would have known not to put the garment in hot
water.
SAY: Water will not typically damage the garment.
However, hot water will discolor it, as is stated on the
label.
THE RIGHT ATTITUDE

Convince the reader that your decision,
although contrary to his/her request, is FAIR,
REASONABLE, NECESSARY, and possible even
ADVANTAGEOUS
THE RIGHT ATTITUDE
Emphasize the positive
 Instead of this:
It is impossible to repair your vacuum cleaner today.

Use this:
Your vacuum cleaner will be ready by Tuesday.
Instead of this:
-Cheap merchandise
-Toilet paper
-Elderly person
Use this:
-Bargain prices
-Bathroom tissue
-Senior citizen
THE RIGHT ATTITUDE

Avoid using company policy/ rules without further
explanation
For e.g.
It would be inconvenient for us…
It would be impossible for us….

Include, if possible, the customer benefit and reasons
behind your rules and policies
THE RIGHT ATTITUDE

Assume that the customer wants to do the
right thing
For e.g.
You have every right to expect high quality in
…
You are probably wondering how you can…
THE RIGHT ATTITUDE

Single out when you praise them
For e.g.
You made an astute choice Ms. Rehman.

Put them in a group when you criticize
For e.g.
People sometimes misinterpret the terms of the warranty.

Mention mistakes by using impersonal
construction
For e.g.
Some of these figures need to be rechecked.
POSITIVE PHRASING
Instead of this
 We have received
your broken clock.
I
cannot understand
what you mean.
 The
damage won’t
be fixed for a week.
 There
will be a delay
in your order.
Say this
 We have received
the clock you sent
us.
 Please clarify your
request.
 The item will be
repaired next week.
 We will ship your
order as soon as
possible.
FRIENDLY, POSITIVE CLOSE.

Endings should be positive




Offer assurances.
Invite future patronage
Make clear whatever action is required
Give alternatives.