“COLLEGIALITY AND
THE PARADOX OF POWER”
Michael H. Crosby, OFMCap.
USG-UISG Commission on JPIC
Fratelli delle Scuole Christiane
20.03.14
Roma
“PARADOX”
1. An apparent contradiction: an ambiguity,
mystery, enigma. “Those who want to save
their lives must lose their lives:” Jesus
2. An actual contradiction: an absurdity,
inconsistency, nonsense. “If everything is
possible then nothing is possible. Nothing is
possible for the self because it is the object
that is possible.”
3. “Absolute power is impotence.” Jacques Ellul
THE PARADOX OF COLLEGIALITY
1. The Second Vatican Council dealt with collegiality in terms
of the power-relationship between the papacy and
episcopacy at its various levels. LG, #42.
2. Synods have been “one of the fruits of the Second Vatican
Council” which provided a structure “at the service of the
mission and communion of the church, as an expression of
collegiality.” Pope Francis, 03.07.13
3. “It is always indispensable to ensure the sovereignty of
God. The decisions [made by bishops] cannot be
conditioned by our claims for any groups, cliques or
hegemonies. To guarantee this sovereignty two
attitudes are fundamental: conscience before God and
collegiality.” Pope Francis, 27.02.14
COLLEGIALITY BEYOND PAPACY/EPISCOPACY
“When we say ‘We are Church,’ well, it is true; that is what
we are; we are not just anybody. But the ‘we’ is more
extensive than the group that says those words. The ‘we’ is
the whole community of believers today in all times and
places. So I always say: within the community of believers,
yes, there is as it were the voice of the valid majority, but
there can never be a majority against the apostles or
against the saints: that would be a false majority. We are
Church; let us be Church. Let us be Church precisely by
opening ourselves and stepping outside ourselves and
being Church with others.”
Pope Benedict XVI, 24 September, 2011
ZE11092601/http://www.zenit.org.article-33532?l=english
LEADERSHIP FROM/FOR COLLEGIALITY
CONSEQUENCE OF A NEW CONSCIOUSNESS
• “Faith in big units [of governance] has eroded—in all spheres
of life. Management hierarchies have been flattened. Today
people are more likely to believe that history is driven by
people gathering in the squares and not from the top down.
• “The real power in the world is not military or political. It is
the power of individuals to withdraw their consent .
• “We live in a country in which many people act as if history is
leaderless. Events emerge spontaneously from the ground
up. Such a society is very hard to lead and summon. It can be
governed only by someone who arouses intense moral
loyalty . . .”
David Brooks, “The Leaderless Doctrine,” 11.03.14
THE NEED FOR A NEW CONSCIOUSNESS
A human being is part of the whole called by us universe, a
part limited in time and space. We experience ourselves,
our thoughts and feelings as something separate from the
rest. A kind of optical delusion of consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal
desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us.
Our task must be to free ourselves from the prison
by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all
living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty. We shall require a substantially new manner of
thinking if humankind is to survive.
Albert Einstein 02.12.50
POWER =
“I AM”
Thinking
Feeling
Acting
Power is about Relationships
JUSTICE/RIGHTEOUSNESS/DIKAIOSÚNE
• In the Old Testament dikaiosúne addresses
the character of communal relationships.
• Justice is “fidelity to the demands of a relationship.”
John R. Donohue, SJ,
The Faith that Does justice: Examining the Christian Sources for Social Change, 68.
• In Matthew (7x) dikaiosúne is at the heart of
the Sermon on the Mount (5:6, 10, 20). It
envisions a new social ordering of power in
relationships moving from injustice to justice.
Power is “the ability to influence”
POWER =
“I AM”
Thinking
Feeling
Acting
Power is about Relationships
POWER: “The [his, her, their]
ability to influence”
JPIC ANIMATORS AS LEADERS
LEADERS AS INFLUENCERS
LEADERSHIP
AS
INFLUENCE-SHIP
CARE
Correction
• Challenge
Affirmation
• Respect
POSITIVE
WAYS OF
RELATING
+ FORCE / ENERGY
Power is “the ability to influence”
POWER =
“I AM”
Thinking
Feeling
Acting
Power is about Relationships
- FORCE / ENERGY
Coercion
Exploitation
Manipulation
Domination
CONTROL
NEGATIVE
WAYS OF
RELATING
PROBING MORE DEEPLY SOME
DYNAMICS OF CONTROL
IN RELATIONSHIPS
(Individual, Familial/Group, Institutional)
1. Coercion
2. Exploitation
3. Manipulation
4. Domination
COERCION
• The dynamics of a group (pressure) or more
powerful entity effectively deny the freedom
to disagree or dissent to its members or
others.
• Adolescence and the “need to belong.”
• When the group’s coercive power dominates,
the ultimate moral authority of a person’s
informed conscience is undermined.
EXPLOITATION
• The use of force to get someone to act against
his/her conscience
• The act of using something or someone in an
unjust or cruel manner for the benefit of some at
the expense of others.
• The objectification of human beings; using people
(persons) as a resource (things); human
exploitation.
• Arbitrary and/or abusive use of power in various
kinds of relationships.
MANIPULATION
• Mental manipulation: withholding facts or a fuller
truth from another to fulfill something desired.
• Emotional manipulation: used when honesty will
not work. The use of guilt. Victimization.
• Covert Aggression vs. Covert-Aggressive
Personalities (habitual dynamics of deceit; wolves
in sheep’s clothing). Victimization. Projection.
Selective Inattention.
• Reflect on the saying: “Secrecy is what gives
manipulators their power”
DOMINATION: (Dominari, Dominus)
• To control, govern or rule by overpowering
authority or power.
• To exert supreme influence on or over
• To have a commanding or controlling position
in relationship to others in your field
• Riane Eisler: western society reflects a system
of “domination” rather than partnership (i.e.
“collegiality”)
“What gives power its charge, positive or negative, is the quality of relationships. Those who
relate through coercion, or from a disregard for
the other person, create negative energy. Those
who are open to others and who see others in
their fullness create positive energy. Love in
organizations, then, is the most potent source
of power we have available. And all because we
inhabit a quantum universe that knows nothing
of itself, independent of its relationships.”
Margaret J. Wheatley, Leadership and the New Science, 39.
POWER AND AUTHORITY OF JESUS
VIS-A-VIS THE RELIGIOUS LEADERS
When Jesus had
TWO MAIN KINDS OF
finished saying these
words [giving voice],
he left the crowds
spellbound because he
taught with authority
DE JURE DE FACTO
[exousía], not like
Leaders Having It Jesus Given It
their religious leaders. by Their Law
by the Crowd
AUTHORITY
Matt. 7:28-29
Bishop: “My priests do not “When a particular
respect my authority.”
form of faith bePOWER: “the ability to
influence”
AUTHORITY: “the power
to elicit:
• respect
• trust
• and obedience”
comes a dominant
ideology, then it can
deceive itself into
believing that
outward conformity
means assent and
commitment.”
Archbishop Diarmuid Martin,
The Tablet, 14 March, 2009
CARE
Correction
• Challenge
Affirmation
• Respect
POSITIVE
WAYS OF
RELATING
+ FORCE / ENERGY
Power is “the ability to influence”
POWER =
“I AM”
Thinking
Feeling
Acting
Power is about Relationships
- FORCE / ENERGY
Coercion
Exploitation
Manipulation
Domination
Fear
CONTROL
Injury
ABUSE
Intimidation
Hurt
Suffering
Abuse is “any way one uses to control
another through fear and intimidation
NEGATIVE
WAYS OF
RELATING
“It is not power
that corrupts but
fear. Fear of losing
power corrupts
those who wield it,
and fear of the
scourge of power
corrupts those who
are subject to it.”
Aung San Suu Kyi
CARE
Correction
• Challenge
Affirmation
• Respect
POSITIVE
WAYS OF
RELATING
+ FORCE / ENERGY
Power is “the ability to influence”
POWER =
“I AM”
Thinking
Feeling
NEGATIVE
WAYS OF
RELATING
Acting
Power is about Relationships
- FORCE / ENERGY
Coercion
Exploitation
Manipulation
Domination
Fear
CONTROL
“Violence can never be justified”
“Violence in any form is sinful”
War
Injury
ABUSE
Intimidation
Hurt
Suffering
Abuse is “any way one uses to control
another through fear and intimidation
DESTRUCTIVE
CONFLICT
Misunderstanding
VIOLENCE
Divorce
BREAK
Walkout
Strike
HOW INDIVIDUALS/GROUPS/NATIONS
DEVELOP ATTITUDES LEADING TO WAR
Ralph K. White, Nobody Wanted War
1. Immediate cause that “starts” the war
2. Underlying attitudes that justify the war
•
•
•
•
•
Diabolical enemy image (the other is evil)
“Virile” self-image (has resources to win)
Moral self-image (righteousness)
Selective interpretation of reality (not all facts)
Lack of empathy (no real care for the other)
CARE
Correction
• Challenge
Affirmation
• Respect
POSITIVE
WAYS OF
RELATING
+ FORCE / ENERGY
Power is “the ability to influence”
POWER =
“I AM”
Thinking
Feeling
NEGATIVE
WAYS OF
RELATING
Acting
Power is about Relationships
- FORCE / ENERGY
Coercion
Exploitation
Manipulation
Domination
Fear
CONTROL
“Violence can never be justified”
“Violence in any form is sinful”
Injury
ABUSE
Intimidation
Hurt
Suffering
Abuse is “any way one uses to control
another through fear and intimidation
DESTRUCTIVE
CONFLICT
Misunderstanding
VIOLENCE
War
Don’t Care
Divorce
Apathy
BREAK
Walkout
Strike
HATE
INDIFFERENCE
Hardness of
Heart
“THE GLOBALIZATION OF INDIFFERENCE”
UNDERMINING THE POWER OF COMPASSION
“To sustain a lifestyle which excludes others,
or to sustain enthusiasm for that selfish ideal,
a globalization of indifference has developed.
Almost without being aware of it, we end up
being incapable of feeling compassion at the
outcry of the poor, weeping for other people’s
pain, and feeling a need to help them.”
Pope Francis, Evangelii Gaudium, 54.
CARE
Correction
• Challenge
Affirmation
• Respect
POSITIVE
WAYS OF
RELATING
+ FORCE / ENERGY
Power is “the ability to influence”
POWER =
“I AM”
Thinking
Feeling
Acting
ANGER
NEGATIVE
WAYS OF
RELATING
Power is about Relationships
- FORCE / ENERGY
Coercion
Exploitation
Manipulation
Domination
Fear
CONTROL
Injury
ABUSE
Intimidation
Hurt
Suffering
DESTRUCTIVE
CONFLICT
Misunderstanding
VIOLENCE
War
Don’t Care
Divorce
Apathy
BREAK
Walkout
Strike
HATE
INDIFFERENCE
Hardness of
Heart
THE SOURCES OF ANGER
1. Negative: A sense or feeling of having been hurt or
abused or violated in some way: made to suffer
2. Positive: A sense of feeling of having been denied some
legitimate need: affirmation, respect, care
3. A feeling of being powerless in the face of dynamics
beyond one’s control; angst in response to something
experienced as wrong or unjust.
THE EXPRESSIONS OF ANGER
1. Depression and/or indifference
2. Resentment and/or rage
3. Passion and/or zeal (for some cause)
FROM CONTROL TO ENLIGHTENMENT
• Entitlement vs. Abandonment
• Appropriation vs. Non-appropriation
• Possessiveness vs. “Nada”
• Dynamics of Control vs. Enlightenment
• Attachment vs. Detachment
• Addiction vs. “Letting Go”
• Running after vs. Seeking First
• Acquisitiveness vs. Renunciation
• Claiming vs. Surrender
• Clinging vs. Releasing
CARE
Correction
• Challenge
Affirmation
• Respect
POSITIVE
WAYS OF
RELATING
+ FORCE / ENERGY
Zeal / Passion
Power is “the ability to influence”
POWER =
“I AM”
Thinking
ANGER
Feeling
NEGATIVE
WAYS OF
RELATING
Acting
Power is about Relationships
Rage / Resentment
- FORCE / ENERGY
Coercion
Exploitation
Manipulation
Domination
Fear
CONTROL
Injury
ABUSE
Intimidation
Hurt
Suffering
DESTRUCTIVE
CONFLICT
Misunderstanding
VIOLENCE
War
Don’t Care
Divorce
Apathy
BREAK
Walkout
Strike
HATE
INDIFFERENCE
Hardness of
Heart
WHAT MAKES US CHOOSE TO CHANGE?
• A realization of our own powerlessness vis-à-vis
another reality.
• A realization that I have come under the control of
a force, dynamic or power outside my “self” (my “I
am”).
• A realization that, if I continue in this destruc-tive
path, I will destroy myself. Role of anger.
• A realization that I am “not doing unto others
what I would not want them to do unto me” (or
v.v.)
TOWARD COLLEGIAL LEADERSHIP
• The need for a “new mentality” (consciousness)
about collegiality/collaboration (Pope Benedict XVI, 28.05.09)
• Collegiality as a way to address the paradox of
power when it has been expressed as control.
• Collegial leadership contributes to the eradication
of incivility in groups http://www.magnapubs.com/catalog/collegialityfrom-a-positive-leadership-perspective/
• Collegial leadership contributes to the “emancipation” of people who help transform structures.
http://www.ajol.info/index.php/saje/article/viewFile/24980/20680
CARE: FOUNDATION OF HUMANE LIVING
1. Scientists generally acknowledge the connection
between altruism and healthy self-interest (contra
unhealthy self-preoccupation).
2. Such altruism has a genetic connection re: the survival
of the species: when an organism sacrifices its life to
save another, it helps perpetuate their shared genes.
3. Human altruism is reflected in empathy with those in
need or distress.
4. Women tend to be more empathetic because it is triggered by oxytocin, a hormone (birth and breast-feeding.
5. Both women and men evidence greater empathy when
oxytocin is administered to them.
HEALTHY SELF-ESTEEM & OTHER-CARE
“We now face the haunting prospect of approach-
ing global empathy in a highly energy-intensive,
interconnected world, riding on the back of an escalating entropy bill that now threatens catastrophic
climate change and our very existence. Resolving the
empathy/entropy paradox will likely be the critical
test of our species’ ability to survive and flourish on
Earth in the future. This will necessitate a fundamental rethinking of our philosophical, economic, and
social models”
Jeremy Rifkin, The Empathic Civilization:
The Race to Global Consciousness in a World in Crisis, 2.
LINKING EMPATHY AND ENTROPY
• Empathy (contra sympathy): the ability to enter into
the pain and suffering of another
• Entropy: the loss of energy that takes place in its use;
the loss of usable energy.
• “The recognition of another’s finite existence is what
connects empathic consciousness to entropic
awareness. When we identify with another’s plight, it’s
their will to live that we empathize with and seek to
support . . . When we empathize with another being,
there is an unconscious understanding that their very
existence, like our own, is a fragile affair, which is made
possible by the continuous flow of energy through
their being”
Jeremy Rifkin, 40-41
Freedom
CARE
HEALING
Trust Healthy
Correction
• Challenge
Affirmation
• Respect
POSITIVE
WAYS OF
RELATING
+ FORCE / ENERGY
Zeal / Passion
Power is “the ability to influence”
POWER =
“I AM”
Thinking
ANGER
Feeling
NEGATIVE
WAYS OF
RELATING
Acting
Power is about Relationships
Rage / Resentment
- FORCE / ENERGY
Coercion
Exploitation
Manipulation
Domination
Fear
CONTROL
Injury
ABUSE
Intimidation
Hurt
Suffering
DESTRUCTIVE
CONFLICT
Misunderstanding
VIOLENCE
War
Don’t Care
Divorce
Apathy
BREAK
Walkout
Strike
HATE
INDIFFERENCE
Hardness of
Heart
CREATING RELATIONSHIPS
AND COMMUNITIES
DEFINED BY THE
POWER/DYNAMICS
OF FAMILIAL TRUST
Given Its Placement on “The Power Chart”
TRUST IN RELATIONSHIPS
• Is possible to the degree that we become
FREE FROM the dynamics of fear, bully-ing
and intimidation
• Is possible when we empower the other and
also are empowered by the other TO SHARE
FREELY what is in our hearts (i.e. our thinking,
feeling and actions)
THE SPEED OF TRUST:
•
•
•
•
THE ONE THING THAT CHANGES EVERYTHING
Power = the ability to influence.
“Trust is the ultimate root and source of our
influence.”
Stephen M. R. Covey, The Speed of Trust, xxiv.
Therefore, at its core, trust involves power in every
relationship.
“Trust is like the aquifer—the huge water pool
under the earth that feeds all of the subsurface
wells.”
Covey, The Speed of Trust, xxv.
THE NEED TO NAME/ADDRESS OUR
FEAR[S] BEFORE WE CAN MOVE TO TRUST
“We all endure fear, but some of us are literally under its control, often without realizing
it. Our choices, actions, feelings and worldview can become hostage to this paralyzing
emotion, which then fuels the depression,
anxiety and worry that are more often
labeled as ‘the problem.’”
Philip Chard, “Fear Can Devour All Aspects of One’s Life,”
Out of My Mind Column, Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel 06.08.10
NAMING/ADDRESSING OUR FEARS
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
Fear of abandonment; being left alone
Fear of scarcity and insecurity
Fear of dying; fear of the unknown
Fear of hurting self or others
Fear of loss of assumed control
Fear of rejection (not being accepted)
Fear of failure (or success)
Fear of intimacy; deeper relationships
Fear of trusting
BUILDING A FOUNDATION OF TRUST
• Eliminating the power dynamics of control
(coercion, manipulation, domination, exploitation), fear and intimidation.
• Healing the hurts caused by the above ways of
relating through conflict resolution.
• Listening to and understanding each other in ways
that lead to mutual respect.
• Creating healthy “envelopes of care” that are
grounded in agreements around affirmation/
acceptance and correction/challenge
POWER = ABILITY TO INFLUENCE =
RELATIONSHIPS
LISTENING
UNDERSTANDING
RESPECT and APPRECIATION
AFFIRMATION and CORRECTION
ENVIRONMENT OF CARE
TRUST
TRUST AS CON-FIDERE
IDENTITY
FORMATION
FAITH /
MEANING
RELATIONAL
DYNAMICS
SelfAwareness
Personal
SelfDefined
SelfAcceptance
Relationships
SelfDirected
SelfDisclosure
Trust /
Trustworthiness
SelfEntrusting
SelfDonation
Commitment to
the Other
Collaboration
with the Other
Understanding
Freedom
CARE
HEALING
CONSTRUCTIVE
COLLABORATION
Trust Healthy
Correction
• Challenge
Affirmation
• Respect
POSITIVE
WAYS OF
RELATING
+ FORCE / ENERGY
Zeal / Passion
Power is “the ability to influence”
POWER =
“I AM”
Thinking
ANGER
Feeling
NEGATIVE
WAYS OF
RELATING
Acting
Power is about Relationships
Rage / Resentment
- FORCE / ENERGY
Coercion
Exploitation
Manipulation
Domination
Fear
CONTROL
Injury
ABUSE
Intimidation
Hurt
Suffering
DESTRUCTIVE
CONFLICT
Misunderstanding
VIOLENCE
War
Don’t Care
Divorce
Apathy
BREAK
Walkout
Strike
HATE
INDIFFERENCE
Hardness of
Heart
THE VIRTUE OF COLLEGIAL LEADERSHIP
There are two dimensions of collegiality when it is
understood as a professional virtue.
1. The first involves the fulfillment of obligations
that stem from memberships. In the case of a
school, it involves membership in the teaching
profession and in the school as a community.
2. The second dimension of collegiality has to do
with why one behaves collegially. What makes
people collegial is a common cause, shared
professional values, and a shared sense of
being stewards of a professional heritage.
MISUNDERSTANDING(S)
CONFLICT
COLLABORATION / COLLEGIALITY
PARTICIPATIVE COMMUNICATION
RESPECTFUL LISTENING
MUTUAL UNDERSTANDING
COMMON AGREEMENT(S)
Understanding
Freedom
CARE
HEALING
CONSTRUCTIVE
COLLABORATION
Trust Healthy
Gentle
NONVIOLENCE
Non-hurtful
Correction
• Challenge
Affirmation
• Respect
POSITIVE
WAYS OF
RELATING
+ FORCE / ENERGY
Zeal / Passion
Power is “the ability to influence”
POWER =
“I AM”
Thinking
ANGER
Feeling
NEGATIVE
WAYS OF
RELATING
Acting
Power is about Relationships
Rage / Resentment
- FORCE / ENERGY
Coercion
Exploitation
Manipulation
Domination
Fear
CONTROL
Injury
ABUSE
Intimidation
Hurt
Suffering
DESTRUCTIVE
CONFLICT
Misunderstanding
VIOLENCE
War
Don’t Care
Divorce
Apathy
BREAK
Walkout
Strike
HATE
INDIFFERENCE
Hardness of
Heart
© Michael H. Crosby 2009
THE “STRENGTH” OF NONVIOLENCE
• “Faith and violence are incompatible! Faith
and violence are incompatible! Faith and
strength go together. The Christian is not
violent, but he strong. And with what
strength? That of meekness, the force of
meekness, the force of love.”
Pope Francis, 08.18.13
• “Blessed are the praüs; they will inherit the
earth.“ Nonviolence for earth’s survival.
• Praüs as non-violence; the non-violent have
found a powerful way to live on earth.
ST. PAUL’S WAY OF
“PRACTICING THE TRUTH”
1.“Practice the truth . . .
2. in love . . .
3.in order to build up the body
[the relationship, the family, the
marriage, etc.]
NON-VIOLENT
COMMUNICATION
(Marshall Rosenberg, NonViolent Communication)
1. Stating what has been OBSERVED.
2. Stating how this made/makes me FEEL.
3. Stating how this reveals a human NEED.
4. REQUESTING some kind of action.
“Principled Leadership: Think Needs”
Loughlan Sofield and Carroll Juliano, Human Development 32.3 (Fall, 2011)
“Behaviors that seem erratic, illogical, or selfdefeating can be understood only when one
accepts that at some level these behaviors are
meeting human needs.”
“The challenge [for leaders] is not only to
refrain from reacting, but, more importantly, to
move to the level of cognition and try to understand the need that produced the behavior.”
“Principled Leadership: Think Needs”
Loughlan Sofield and Carroll Juliano, Human Development 32.3 (Fall, 2011)
“Human behavior often has its origin in
addressing and meeting human needs. If you
wish to understand a person or group’s
behavior, it is important to consi-der what
human needs are being met by that behavior.
Accepting this leadership principle helps to
make sense out of your own and others’
seemingly erratic behavior.”
Understanding
Freedom
CARE
HEALING
CONSTRUCTIVE
COLLABORATION
Trust Healthy
Gentle
NONVIOLENCE
PEACE
LOVE
Non-hurtful
Correction
• Challenge
Affirmation
• Respect
POSITIVE
WAYS OF
RELATING
+ FORCE / ENERGY
Zeal / Passion
Power is “the ability to influence”
POWER =
“I AM”
Thinking
ANGER
Feeling
NEGATIVE
WAYS OF
RELATING
Acting
Power is about Relationships
Rage / Resentment
- FORCE / ENERGY
Coercion
Exploitation
Manipulation
Domination
Fear
CONTROL
COMPASSION
Injury
ABUSE
Intimidation
Hurt
Suffering
DESTRUCTIVE
CONFLICT
Misunderstanding
VIOLENCE
War
Don’t Care
Divorce
Apathy
BREAK
Walkout
Strike
HATE
INDIFFERENCE
Hardness of
Heart
© Michael H. Crosby 2009
THE POWER OF COMPASSION
• “The sentiment of compassion and
humanity [is] inscribed in the heart of
every person.”
Pope Benedict XVI,
July 16, 2011
• In Tibetan, compassion = NOBLE HEART.
• “The quivering of the heart in response to
another’s suffering.” Mary Jo Meadows
• The goal of life: to cultivate a ♥ moved,
energized, empowered by compassion
JESUS’ TEACHING IN LUKE’S GOSPEL RE:
COMPASSION TOWARD THE ESTRANGED
• The Parable of the Good Samaritan = Jesus’
response to the query: “Who is my neighbor?”
• The culturally received notions about “reciprocity”
toward one’s own, one’s kin and one’s enemy that
colored the worldview of the religious leader
questioning Jesus.
• Why did the Priest and Levite “see him” and “pass
by” [i.e. not be moved by compassion]? Religious
duty demanded non-involvement with the “other.”
• How our position of privilege blinds us re: “other.”
The Incidents in Matthew’s Gospel Where
ONE’S ♥ IS MOVED WITH COMPASSION
• 9:36: Seeing the crowds harassed and helpless, Jesus
calls the Twelve and gives them exousia to heal . . .
• 14:14: Seeing the crowds with the sick, Jesus heals
them.
• 15:32: Knowing the crowd with him for three days had
nothing to eat, Jesus empowers the disciples to feed
them.
• 18:27: A “Kindom” Story: The ruler’s way of seeing
changed in the way he forgave the debtor owing
10,000,000 days; empowered him to do likewise.
• 20:34: Upon engaging the two blind men, they regain
their sight and follow Jesus.
CULTIVATING THE POWER OF COMPASSION
The Dynamic of Entering/Extending God’s Kindom
Found in the Five Matthean Passages
ONE
SEES
SEES
CARES
CARES
ACTS
ACTS
OTHER
OVERCOMING the OBSTACLES
to Having a ♥ Moved with Compassion
• Discovering what keeps us from SEEING the pain/
suffering among and around us?
• Addressing the obstacles that keep our hearts from
feeling CARE or COMPASSION at seeing the pain/
suffering among and around us.
• Giving expression to the power/impulse of CARE or
COMPASSION that makes us feel CALLED to do
something about the pain/suffering among and
around us.
MOVING TO COMPASSION
Our task must be to free ourselves
from the prison [of thinking we are
separated from others] by widening
our circle of compassion to embrace
all living creatures and the whole of
nature in its beauty. We shall require
a substantially new manner of thinking if humankind is to survive.
Albert Einstein, February 12, 1950
MISUNDERSTANDING(S)
CONFLICT
Unresolved Tensions
Unrealized Expectations
UnAGREEd-Upon Assumptions
RECEIVED UNCRITIQUED
CULTURAL BELIEFS
RECEIVED UNCRITIQUED
RELIGIOUS BELIEFS
MISUNDERSTANDING(S)
CONFLICT MANAGEMENT
CONFLICT RESOLUTION
1. At least one must want the conflicted relationship to
change; the other(s) must be open to go through the steps/
process to try to resolve the conflict.
2. Active listening. Each listens w/o interruption to the other[s]’
interpretation except to clarify. Then repeats it.
WHY ACTIVE LISTENING IS KEY TO THER
PROCESS OF OVERCOMING OUR
MISUNDERSTANDINGS
• At least 60% of misunderstandings in business
arise from “poor listening.”
• We listen selectively and primarily to opinions
that agree with our own.
• We interpret selectively, adapting what we “hear”
to our own preconceived ideas as to whether
they are “good” or “bad”
• We remember selectively. “Selective Inattention”
MISUNDERSTANDING(S)
CONFLICT MANAGEMENT
CONFLICT RESOLUTION
1. At least one must want the conflicted relationship to
change; the other(s) must be open to go through the steps/
process to try to resolve the conflict.
2. Active listening. Each listens w/o interruption to the other[s]’
interpretation except to clarify. Then repeats it.
3. Understanding (mutual) flowing from the “active listening.”
4. Acceptance of the one(s) who did “it,” even if the “it”
remains unacceptable.
5. Admission that one had an influence in creating the conflict.
MISUNDERSTANDING(S)
CONFLICT MANAGEMENT
CONFLICT RESOLUTION
1. At least one must want the conflicted relationship to change; in
response the other(s) must be open to go through the process/steps
to try to resolve the conflict.
2. Active listening. Each listens w/o interruption except to clarify. Then
repeats it.
3. Understanding (mutual) flowing from the “active listening.”
4. Acceptance of the one(s) who did “it,” even if the “it” remains
unacceptable.
5. Admission that one had an influence in creating the conflict.
RECONCILIATION
6. Repentance / Apology in words / actions.
7. Forgiveness / Release in words / actions.